^2>fct^^rx^-'

Dr. Andrew MeFarland,
Formerly Superintendent of Insane Asylum, Jacksonville, Illinois.

Modern Persecution,

jttsatu Isglttms itiDnhd,

AS DEMONSTRATED BY THE

Report of the Investigating Committee of the Legislature

of Illinois,

By Mrs. E. P. W. PACKARD.

" Ye Shall Know the Truth.*'

Published, by the Authoress.

Yol. I.

HARTIPORD:
CASE, LOCKWOOD & BRAINARD, PRINTERS AND BINDERS.

1874.

/S79*- *S >Vo

Entered according to act of Congress, in the year 1873, by

^RS. f,. f. Y' f ACKARD,

In the Office of the Librarian of Congress, at Washington, D. C

1 1918

PICTURE I.
The Insane Asylum at Jacksonville, Illinois,

PICTURE II.
Dr. Andrew MeFarland.

PICTURE III.
Kidnapping Mrs. Packard.

PICTURE IV.
"George, we have no Mother!"

PICTURE V.
"How can I Live without my Children!"

PICTURE VI.
Not Alienated.

PICTURE VII.
Popular Mode of Curing Insanity!

PICTURE VIII.

Enforcing the "Nonentity" principle of Common
Law for Married Women.

TO MY BELOVED CHILDREN

IS THIS BOOK

MOST AFFECTIONATELY DEDICATED

To you, my first-born son, Theophilus Packard, Jr., born
March 17, 1842 : and you, my second child, Isaac Ware
Packard, born June 24, 1844 ; and you, my third child,
Samuel Ware Packard, born November 29, 1847 ; and you,
my only daughter, Elizabeth Ware Packard, born May 10,
1850 ; and you, my fifth child, George Hastings Packard,
born July 18, 1853 ; and you, my sixth child, Arthur
D wight Packard, born December 18, 1858 ; — I dedicate this
Book, or a record of your mother's persecuted life — of that
life of which you are the sun, moon and stars. Yes, it is for
you, my jewels, I have lived — it is for you I have suffered the
agonies of Gethsemane's Garden — it is for you I have hung on
this cross of crucifixion ; and been entombed three years in a
living cemetery ; and oh ! it is for your sakes I hope to rise
again, to find my maternal joys immortalized.

Children dear, when all the world forsook me and fled, you
stood firm for right, firm for truth, firm for duty ; you, and
you alone, were true to the mother who bore you, for you knew
she was true to man, and true to God. Yes, your tender, lov-
ing hearts have writhed in secret agony over your mother's
sorrows — but you have been denied the boon of human sym-
pathy for yourselves ; and, what is harder still, you have not
been allowed to bestow it upon your persecuted mother, even,
while her lacerated heart was panting to receive it from you.

vj ' DEDICATION.

Yes, you, my first-born son, Theophilus, have been threat-
ened with disinheritance from our family and home, because
you loved your kind-hearted mother so well, that you sought
to visit her in her prison-home in defiance of your father's
edict. Oh, my son ! Thy Father, God, will not disinherit
thee for loving thy mother, even when the world forsook her.
Four times has thy hard-earned wages, my filial Theophilus,
been cheerfully expended to visit your mother in her dreary
cell.

And you, my Isaac, I have consented to lay upon the altar
of my country — a living sacrifice for its sin. God has accepted
the sacrifice and spared my Isaac ! In the army you toiled
early and late to accumulate a treasure, with which you could
visit your mother. God succeeded you — you paid me one
clandestine visit in my prison.

Your two clandestine letters are all the letters from my
children I have been permitted to receive. But oh ! I needed
no such proofs of your true love to assure me it was not dead
within you.

No, death and a living tomb cannot separate us. We are
one in Christ. Oh, my children ! Every earthly love has died
within me — but oh ! the death agonies of the maternal love
well nigh rent soul and body asunder. Yes, the mother has
died ! But she has risen again — the mother of her country—
and her sons and daughters are — The American Republic.

Children, it is for the service of your country your mother
has dedicated you, one and all. May you, my sons, be fitted
to adorn the garden of American freedom, " as plants," grown
up in your youth, from the rocky but luxuriant soil of family
persecution. And may you, my daughter, be as a " corner-
stone," in our new temple of American freedom — " polished
after the similitude of a palace."

CONTENTS

•-♦-•

Page.
Introduction 13

CHAPTER I.
The Bible Class 33

CHAPTER II.
Evil Forebodings 39

CHAPTER TIL
My Abduction 51

CHAPTER IV.
My Journey 64

CHAPTER V.
My Reception 73

CHAPTER VI.
My Eirst Day of Prison Life 75

CHAPTER VII.

The Parting Scene 84

CHAPTER VIII.
Disappointed Hopes 88

CHAPTER IX.
Sunny Side of my Prison Life 96

CHAPTER X.
Letters to my Husband and Children 104

CHAPTER XL
My Transition 110

CHAPTER XII.

My Removal from the Best Ward to the Worst 114

CHAPTER Xm.

My Reproof to Dr. McFarland for his Abuse of his Patients 120

CHAPTER XIV
My Occupation • • • • 138

Viil CONTENTS.

CHAPTER XV. Page.

Evidences ot My Insanity 144

CHAPTER XVI.
The Attendant who Abused Me 152

CHAPTER XVH.

" Let Dr. McFarland Bear his own Sins !" 156

CHAPTER XVIII.
Attempted Reconciliation with Mr. Packard 158

CHAPTER XIX.

Letter to My Children sent to the Wash-tub 164

CHAPTER XX.
How I Obtained my first Writing Paper 168

CHAPTER XXL
The Modern Mode of Subjugating Married Women 171

CHAPTER XXII.

My Life Imperilled 176

CHAPTER XXIII.
Self-Defense — Clandestine Letters 181

CHAPTER XXIV.
" You should Return to your Husband" 191

CHAPTER XXV.
Miss Mary Tomlin — A Model Attendant 195

CHAPTER XXVI.
Mrs. McFarland— The Matron 200

CHAPTER XXVII.

The Sane kept for the Doctor's Benefit 204

CHAPTER XXVHI.
Record of a Day 209

CHAPTER XXIX.
How I Bought and Retained some Paper 213

CHAPTER XXX.
How Mr. Packard gave me Paper, and how Dr. McFarland Stole it 219

CHAPTER XXXI.
My Family Relatives 222

CONTENTS. ix

CHAPTER XXXII. Page.

Old Mrs. Timmons Deserted by Her Children 227

CHAPTER XXXIII.

Mrs. Cheueworth's Suicide — Medical Abuse 231

CHAPTER XXXIV.

Changes and how brought about 240

CHAPTER XXXV.

My Battle with Despotism — No Surrender 244

CHAPTER XXXVI.

Reading Books and Papers 250

CHAPTER XXXVII.

Abusing Mrs. Stanley 254

CHAPTER XXXVIII.

Subduing a New Prisoner 258

CHAPTER XXXIX.

Treatment of the Sick 263

CHAPTER XL.

Mrs. Leonard's Visit to her Mother *. «... 266

CHAPTER XLI.

Mrs. Emeline Bridgman — or Nature's Laws Broken 271

CHAPTER XLII.

Sick Patients Driven off from their Beds 279

CHAPTER XLIII.

Interview with Mr. Wells, of Chicago — A Victim of Homesickness 284

CHAPTER XLIV.

An Asylum Sabbath 291

CHAPTER. XL V.

An Attendant put under My Charge 293

CHAPTER XLVL

A Scene in the Fifth Ward 296

CHAPTER XLVH.

Mrs. Olsen's Fifth Ward Experiences 300

CHAPTER XLV1TI.
Mrs. Olsen's Eighth Ward Experience 317

X CONTENTS.

CHAPTER XLIX. Pagb.

"Wives and Husbands There Must Part" 327

CHAPTER L.

How to make Incurables 330

CHAPTER LI.
I was Punished for Telling the Truth 338

CHAPTER LIL
The Prisoner who called Himself " Jesus Christ !" 344

CHAPTER LIII.
My First Opportunity for Self-Defense 349

CHAPTER LIV.
My Exposure of Calvinism and Defense of Christianity 357

CHAPTER LV.
The Dawning of a New Dispensation 364

CHAPTER LVI.
The Moral Barometer Indicates a Storm — A Hurricane 306

CHAPTER LVII.

The Clouds Disperse 377

CHAPTER LVTH.
My Oldest Son Obtains My Discharge 383

CHAPTER LIX.
The Trustees Force me into the Hands of Mr. Packard 386

CHAPTER LX.
An Appeal to the Government to Protect the Inmates of Insane Asylums
by Law 397

PREFACE

Providence hinges mighty events on pivots exceedingly
small. What men call accidents, are God's appointed inci-
dents. We are traitors to any truth when we suppress the
utterance of it, and allow the opposite error to go unrebuked.

High principles must be advanced as real laws. A desire to
elevate all mankind to the nobleness for which they are de-
signed, should manifest the depth and purity of our moral
convictions. We should meet evil with mildness, yet with
unfaltering firmness. We should aim to bring out a noble
spirit into daily intercourse, believing that a holy life is a more
precious offering to truth, than retired speculations and writ-
ings ; for he who leaves a holy life behind him, bequeaths to
the world a richer legacy than any book. The want of moral
courage to carry out great principles, and to act upon them at
all risks, is fatal to originality, because the faculties slumber
within, being weighed down by the chains of custom.

This habit of reliance upon principle should give us a buoy-
ant consciousness of superiority to every outward influence. A
far higher anticipation of great results from worthy deeds,
should make us strenuous in action, and fill us with a cheerful
trust. We must be palsied by no fear to offend, no desire to
please, no dependence upon the judgment of others. The con-
sciousness of self-subsistence, of disinterested conformity to
high principles, will command an open freedom to our utter-
ances, and will summon into our service a spiritual force that
will resist and overcome all obstacles.

xii PREFACE.

Under the inspiration of such sentiments have I penned the
following narrative of my experiences, beneath a dark cloud
of adverse events, whose silver lining is yet to be discovered
to my physical vision.

As the dyer uses mordants to set his colors, so my Heav-
enly Father has employed the mordant of adversity to individ-
ualize my sentiments of morality and virtuous action. And,
by my experiences, it would seem that my Father intended to
so capacitate me that I should be daunted and discouraged by
nothing, that true loyalty might be burned into my heart.
This loyalty demands that individual reason and conscience,
enlightened by revealed truth, be the guide of human actions.
It allows no oligarchy of creeds, sects, or customs to be a
standard, which ignores the individual as a sovereign over
himself. The God within is the monarch of this realm of
human freedom.

Mrs. E. P. W. Packard.

Chicago, Ills., January, 1873.

(1496 Prairie Avenue.)

INTRODUCTION

As an introduction to the dramatic tale contained in this
volume, I shall give my readers a full delineation of my most
radical opinions in the language in which I gave them to the
Bible-class in Manteno, Kankakee county, Illinois, since upon
these opinions, there expressed, rests the foundation of the
whole subsequent drama.

These opinions were given to the class in writing so as to
prevent misrepresentation. At the time I was kidnapped these
Bible-class papers were stolen from me, and were persistently
retained by my husband, Mr. Packard, until sometime after
my liberation, when I got possession of them in the following
manner:

Mr. Packard had for some time been trying to induce me to
sign a deed, so that he could sell some real estate, and I had
objected, unless he should give me some equivalent for what he
had already unjustly taken from me. This he would not do.
He therefore went to Esquire La Brie, and took an oath that
his wife was insane, so that he could sell the property without
my signature.

Finding my refusal was not going to save my right of
dower, or prevent his selling the property, I proposed to him
that I would sign the deed on condition that he would restore
to me my papers. He accordingly called in Esquire La Brie
to witness my signature, and in his presence he gave me my
papers, as I had proposed. This signature was acknowledged
as valid, although two days before Mr. Packard had taken an
oath on the Bible, that I was insane, and thereby incompetent
to sign a deed ! By means of this perjury, on his part, my
papers were restored to me.

xiv INTRODUCTION.

FREE DISCUSSION OF RELIGIOUS BELIEF.

Free discussion implies that both sides of a subject can be
investigated, and allows full liberty to each individual to ex-
press his honestly cherished opinions, and also give his reasons
in support of them. My classmates, we have nothing to fear
in applying the scales of free discussion to our religious belief,
for truth will sustain itself; the scales of free discussion, in-
telligently used, always preponderate on the side of the truth —
that is, the weightiest reasons always bear upon that side, and
indicate a balance in its favor.

For instance, should we wish to test the existence of a God
in the scales of free discussion, what have we to fear in the
use of the scales on this point ? If we are not prepared to
support His existence by such arguments as will make the
scales preponderate right, is it not best for us to bestow study
on that point sufficient to defend it with intelligent reason,
since this is confidently assumed to be a truth in our creed ?
Then we shall be prepared to defend as well as assert our
belief. It is not respectful for us to say to our opponents on
this or any other point, " I know your side is the wrong one,
and you ought to take our positive assertion as authority suffi-
cient to condemn you as a heretic, simply because you believe
contrary to my honestly cherished opinions."

No, my classmates, the religion of authority has had its day ;
a reasonable religion, such as will bear the infallible tests of
truth, based on arguments drawn from God's word and works,
is the religion for us.

Truth should be indorsed by us through our reasoning
faculties alone, and therefore should not conflict with our
common sense and enlightened reason. And it is my
opinion, that the religion God sent to man, is so peculiarly
adapted to man's nature, as not to conflict with the common-

INTRODUCTION. xv

sense views of the common mass ot minds. And ere the bright
millennial day dawns upon us, I believe that theologically
sectarian views will give place to the common-sense views of
mankind, and that this is to be the way there is to be " but
one Lord, one faith, one baptism."

Now, what can be the harm, dear classmates, in our trying
to hasten this day, by bringing our educated belief to this test,
by kindly using the scales of free discussion ? For myself, I
feel willing to have all my opinions tested by these scales, and
I am willing to yield any point of belief to a weightier invin-
cible argument in the opposite scale — that is, those views which
seem best supported by sound argument and candid reasoning
I willingly indorse, although they may conflict with some of
my preconceived ideas, or my educated belief, or even with our
sectarian creeds. For it is not impossible but that some simple
moral truth may have become perverted by educational influ-
ences. And candor and honesty, it seems to me, compel us to
admit that there is a mixture of truth and error in the creeds
of all denominations of Christians, not even excepting the
creed of the Presbyterian church ; and what can be the harm
in thus testing these views, and thereby separating the precious
from the vile, rather than by trying to defend our sectarian
creeds by arguments and reasons which are not based in truth
for their support, thus perpetuating falsehood or errors.

It is my desire, dear classmates, that this social Bible-class
be employed as a means to fit us to become valiant defenders
of our faith — that we here capacitate ourselves to defend all
points of our belief by rational and intelligent reasons, that
we may be able to meet the common enemy of our holy religion
with arguments " such as he cannot gainsay or resist." The
truth never suffers by agitation and free discussion. It is error
alone that fears the light and shrinks before the scales. Let us
dare to judge for ourselves what is right, and let us know what

xvi INTRODUCTION.

right and truth are, by bringing our religious belief to this test
of reason and common sense. Let us throw off the blinding
influence of prejudice and sectarian zeal, and come up upon
the nobler, higher platform of being simple, sincere, charitable,
honest seekers after the real, simple, naked truth.

Having obtained permission from our teacher, Deacon Smith,
to read the above article oefore the class, I commenced read-
ing ; but finding it to be a defense of what he had determined
to stop — free discussion — he interrupted me, by forbidding
my reading any farther. Of course I quietly submitted to this
mandate with unanswering obedience.

RIGHTS OF PRIVATE JUDGMENT.

I profess to be no theologian, or to have adopted the creed
of any sect or denomination of Christians as infallible. But I
do profess to take the works and word of God, or facts and re-
velation as our only infallible guide in our search for truth,
and a " thus saith the Lord," as a settling ot all controversy.
But since I know it to be a fact that equally sincere and honest
Christians put a very different construction upon the same
event of Providence, and the same text of Scripture, I feel
that we are compelled to assume the responsibility of private
judgment. And in so doing, I believe we are obeying Christ's
directions in the fifty-seventh verse of the twelfth chapter of
Luke, viz. : " And why, even of yourselves, judge ye not what
is right ?"

I regard this Bible-class as having reached that state of de-
velopment where God holds us individually responsible for our
belief. I therefore esteem it a great privilege to be in a Bible-
class where our opinions are called for, rather than the opin-
ions of commentators. Not that I wish to disregard the
opinions of commentators or learned theologians in my search
for Bible truth ; for I do think that their opinions are entitled

INTRODUCTION, xvii

to great deference and respect. While I at the same time
believe that a Bible is a book so peculiar in its nature, that
learning and talent are not indispensable to a correct inter-
pretation of it, any more than experience and education are
indispensably necessary to our judging correctly of the wants
of nature.

For instance, because an adult may choose strong drink to
allay his thirst, and the child prefer cold water, I do not
think we are justified in concluding that strong drink is the
best adapted to meet the wants of nature, simply because a
mature man chooses it ; for this adult may have perverted
his natural appetite, so that his choice may not be so much in
accordance with nature as the instincts of the child. As in our
physical, so in our moral nature, there may be a liability that
a simple moral truth may have been perverted by educational
influences. Therefore, I do not think that because a talented
and learned theologian advances an opinion, that he is cer-
tainly correct ; neither because an illiterate layman holds a
different opinion, do I think he is certainly wrong. But in
both cases we should judge of the opinion upon its own intrin-
sic merits, independent of the source or medium through
which it comes to us.

Now, dear classmates, conscious that I am alone and per-
sonally responsible to God for my religious belief, I do not
want to embrace an error. Therefore I will be very thankful
to be shown wherein my opinions are unsound, or my reason-
ing inconclusive. Just consider my views, not as those of a
theologian, but as one who is searching for truth on the same
common plane with yourselves ; and I ask you to give my
opinions no more credence than you think truth entitles them
to as you view it. For it is the common sense of common
men and common women that I so much covet as my tribunal
of judgment, rather than learned commentators, or popular
theologians, or venerable doctors of divinity.

xviii INTRODUCTION,

"TOTAL DEPRAVITY."

It is the authority of creeds, echoed by the theologians and
ministers of the Presbyterian pulpit, not excepting our own
pastor, that human nature is necessarily a sinful nature.

Now, I ask the privilege of presenting to our class this
question " If human, nature is necessarily a sinful nature, how
could Christ take upon himself human nature, and know no
sin?" This question was referred to their pastor for an
answer. Mr. Packard gave it as his opinion that a " Holy
God might make a holy human nature for Christ, and a sinful
nature for the rest of the human family." Upon this, one of
the class inquired, " Can a holy God make sin ? "

These questions troubled both our teacher, Deacon Smith,
and their pastor. They could not answer them satisfactorily
to themselves or the class ; and it was to extricate themselves
from this unpleasant dilemma that they at once agreed that
this question was the result of a diseased brain, from whence
it had emanated, and therefore it was unworthy of their con-
sideration ! Thus their reputation for intelligence and ability
was placed beyond question, and the infallibility of their creed
remained inviolate ! And their "poor afflicted Christian sister "
must be kindly cared for within the massive walls of a prison,
lest her diseased brain communicate its contagion to other
brains, and then what will become of our creed ! for we cannot
afford to follow the example of this " Man of God," and sacri-
fice our wives and mothers to save our creed !

INTRODUCTION. xix

SPARE THE CREED f

Though the mother's heart do bleed,
Spare ! O, spare our trembling creed !
Though her tender infants cry,
Though they pine, and droop, and die,
Though her daily care they need,
Spare ! O, spare our trembling creed !

Force the mother from her home !
That once pure and peaceful dome ;
Bind her fast with maniacs, where
None will heed her yearning prayer;
Let cold bars and bolts and keys
Fetter mothers such as these !
Iron manacles we need
To protect our darling creed.

What are homes or children's claims ?

What a doting mother's aims ?

What were life, love, liberty,

If our creed imperilled be !

Nothing in this world we heed,

Like our dear endangered creed.

Thus State power august hath wrought

Fetters for too daring thought !

Souls thus bold Asylums need, ^

To protect our precious creed.

—Mrs. S. N. B. 0.

This was the pivot on which my reputation for sanity was
suspended ; for I could not be made to confess that God made
a bad or sinful article when He made human nature ; but on
the contrary, I claimed that all which God made was " good "
— that is, was just as He intended it to be ; and I furthermore
argued, that to be natural was to be just as God had made
me to be — that to be unnatural, was to be wrong or sinful. I

xx MODERN PERSECUTION.

claimed that God's work, as He made it, was perfect — it
needed no regeneration to make it right — that regeneration
was necessary only when we had become unnatural or different
from what God had made us.

I willingly acknowledged that our natures in their present
state were perverted or depraved, in many instances to a
painful degree ; but that none are entirely lost to all traces
of the divine image. For example, the drunkard is depraved
in his appetite for drink, and the regeneration he needs is
not a new appetite, but a restoration of it to its natural,
original, unperverted state. Then he would have only a natur-
al appetite for food and drink, which is in itself no sin ; but the
sin consists in his abuse of a natural instinct, not in the natural
use of it. So that the natural exercise of our faculties, as
God has made them, is not wrong, but only the unnatural or
abusive use of them is wrong or sinful.

THE UNLIMITED ATONEMENT.

The professedly orthodox pulpit says, that " God intended
all mankind for a life of purity, virtue and happiness." Now
I wish to ask if God's intentions can be thwarted ? If they
cannot be thwarted, and God intended all mankind for happi-
ness, will not all men be saved ? If God intended it, and does
not accomplish it, is He omnipotent ? I believe God is omni-
potent— that He intends nothing but good — and He will carry
out all his intentions. I believe the devil is not omnipotent —
that he intends nothing but evil — and he will ultimately fail
in all his intentions.

Therefore, God's intention in sending His Son into the world
to redeem and save it, cannot be defeated ; and when He as-
sures us in His word, that He " would that all men be saved,"
I believe that He is sincere, and thereby intends to bring all
men ultimately to repentance and faith in Christ. And when

INTRODUCTION. Kx{

He assures us that " death and hell shall be destroyed," I
believe it. And therefore there must ultimately be a time
when sin and punishment must cease to be ; and as sin and
punishment had a beginning, they must have an end. But as
God never had a beginning, so will He never have an end,
but is destined, ultimately, to be the mighty conqueror and
head over all.

god's immutability.

While Deacon Smith was our teacher, I once asked him this
question, viz. : " Did God change His purpose towards Nineveh,
when he said He would destroy Nineveh and afterward saved
it, as Jonah seemed to think He did, and expostulated with
him to this effect ? "

Deacon Smith replied, " He did not. God never changes
His purposes." This I considered as a correct answer ; but his
attempt to reconcile the two facts, viz. : His attribute of un-
changeableness, and His change toward Nineveh, was not
satisfactory. He simply remarked, " God was not obliged to
explain His plans and operations of government to Jonah's
satisfaction." This reason seemed to my mind to reflect a
degree of dishonor upon the perfect character of our God. I
believe we have a right to inquire, like Jonah, into a knowl-
edge of his ways concerning us, and that we canr and ought,
so to interpret His providences as not to reflect dishonor upon
His character for justice and veracity, either in word or action ;
and I believe He is willing thus to manifest Himself to us, and
thereby convict us of our unreasonable complaints against His
providences toward us. I say this suggestion from Deacon
Smith did not satisfy me, but the suggestion of Mrs. Smith
and Mrs. Dixon did fully satisfy me.

They said, " The Ninevites repented, as a reason why God's
actions toward them changed." Here was the key which un-

xxii INTRODUCTION.

locked all the mystery. It is we that change — not God. He
has unchangeably decreed that sin and sinners shall be punish-
ed. And He has unchangeably decreed to extend pardon and
forgiveness to the repentant sinner. These two eternal pur-
poses are His unchangeable decrees thus to act in all future
time. The Ninevites knew it was so, and therefore they
resorted to the only possible way they could resort to and be
saved. They repented — God's immutable purpose stood un-
changed. They were forgiven, and thus saved.

WHAT IS IT TO BE A CHRISTIAN?

It is not to cease to be a sinner. " No man liveth and sin-
neth not." All come short of perfect obedience to God's laws.
To be a Christian is to be like Christ — that is, to live in accord-
ance with the laws of our being, both physical and moral and
spiritual ; but as our knowledge of these laws is limited, we
are liable to transgress ignorantly ; but the Christian is willing
to put on Christ's righteousness, by repenting of his wrong-
doing, and thus living like him. By obeying God's laws, he
becomes like Christ, and thus puts on his righteousness.

It is one part of my Christianity, as I view it, to obey the
laws of health, and thus live a healthy, natural life, believing
that is the best foundation on which to build up my spiritual
nature. I cannot conceive of a symmetrical spiritual body
without a healthy natural body to sustain it, any more than I
can expect to build a cupola without a house to rest it upon.
" First the natural, then the spiritual," seems to be the order
God has established to develop human beings and make them
like Christ. The human nature must be sublimated into the
divine nature ; or in other words, the lower, animal propensi-
ties must become only the servants of the higher, spiritual
faculties, instead of being their masters as they now are, in
their present depraved or unnatural condition.

INTRODUCTION. xxiii

FREEDOM OP CONSCIENCE.

Conscience is God's vicegerent in the soul. To heed the
voice of conscience is to heed the voice of God. I never dare
to do what I conscientiously believe to be wrong ; neither will
I be deterred from doing what I conscientiously believe to be
right, impossibilities of course excepted, for God never re-
quires of us impossibilities.

I regard my conscience as a safe guide for myself, therefore
I allow it so to others ; while at the same time I believe it is
only safe when it is based upon truth ; and to me, the truth
must be based upon God's revealed will, as I view it in God's
word and works, and is thereby identified with the Bible. But
I do not regard my views of truth as a standard for any other
human being but myself ; therefore I do not feel at liberty to
judge any other's conscience than my own. I cheerfully as-
sume the entire responsibility of my own actions, viewed from
my own standpoint ; but I am not willing to take the respon-
sibility of any other's actions, viewed from their standpoint.
We must all stand or fall for ourselves in judgment. There-
fore, I claim Freedom of Conscience for all the human family
equally with myself.

SPIRITUAL GIFTS.

The following article was prepared for the class, but was
refused a hearing lest it be found to favor Spiritualism :

I differ from Deacon Merrick in the opinion that those
spiritual gifts mentioned in the 12th chapter of 1st Corin-
thians— viz. : " the gifts of healing, working of miracles, pro-
phecying, discerning of spirits, interpretation of tongues, the
word of wisdom, and the word of knowledge," etc., were con-
fined to the apostolic age. But it is my opinion that they are
the legitimate fruits of pure Christianity, and attendant upon

xxiv INTRODUCTION.

it to the end of time. Christ says, " these signs shall follow
them that believe. " Faith is evidently the stock on which
these gifts are grafted, and I believe this is a kind of faith
which it is our duty to cultivate and exercise to the same
degree that the apostles did. And my reasons for this belief
are supported by facts and revelation, as I view it.

First. — The Bible supports this opinion. Christ instructed
us to exercise a kind of faith, which he compares in power to
that of " removing mountains," and also, " if ye had faith as
a grain of mustard seed ye might say to this sycamore tree, be
thou plucked up by the roots, and be thou cast into the sea,
and it shall obey you." Now these illustrations evidently
seem to teach that in the exercise of this faith we may expect
effects to be produced beyond what our reason alone would
justify us in expecting. Again, in James it is said " the prayer
of faith shall save the sick." And again, " all things whatso-
ever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."

Now will it be uncharitable in me to suggest that the faith
of the orthodox churches of the present day may be like unto
the faith of the woman who was told she could have whatever
she asked for, believing she should have it. Shortly after she
wanted something very much, and so prayed for it to get it ;
but it did not come. Chagrined at her failure, she remarked
indignantly, " I knew it would not come when I asked for it !"
Now, may not Christians ask like this woman, ^believing,
instead of believing they shall have them ?

Second. — The proof of facts that this faith was not confined
to the apostles — first, the Bible fact. James directs the churches
to call for the elders of the church " to come and anoint the sick
man with oil, and to pray over him, and the prayer of faith
shall save the sick." These elders who had this power were
not the apostles. And Joel prophesies of the last clay, " your
sons and daughters shall prophesy." From this it seems there
is to be a time in the future when pure, simple Christianity,

INTRODUCTION,

XXV

like that which the apostles taught, is to prevail again upon
the earth, and then these gifts are to follow as the fruits of this
simple faith ; thus showing that this faith was not to be con-
fined to the apostles, but was intended to be the natural her-
itage of the church whenever she became pure enough to
produce this vigorous growth of faith required to ensure these
manifestations. This faith was taught by Christ and exem-
plified by himself and the apostles.

Again, all the Christian fathers, certainly down to the end
of the third century, affirm the continuation of these gifts ;
and they maintain their assertion by well authenticated facts
in church history. But in succeeding ages, when the mass of
Christians had become corrupted by worldly materialism and
carnal-mindedness, these gifts became more and more rarely
manifested, and were mostly confined to the humble few who
adhered more tenaciously to the primitive faith and practice.

Yet instances have occurred among some distinguished teach-
ers of Christianity. So late as the year 1821 Rev. Prince
Hohenlohe, of Wurtenberg, Germany, a distinguished divine,
after preaching to immense crowds, commenced to perform mir-
acles. To the astonishment of the populace, he made the blind
to see, the deaf to hear, the lame to walk, and the paralytics to
be cured ; and in a short time no less than thirty-six persons
were restored to health, from a state of hopeless infirmity.
This he did by his prayers and a firm confidence in God's
power.

Another tact nearer home. About twenty years since I
heard ot a woman in Chesterfield, New Hampshire, who ex-
hibited the power of discerning spirits, by telling at first sight
the true character of entire strangers, as correctly as if she had
always known them. But to come still nearer home. Have
we not seen those who could instinctively read persons at first
sight ? and others who have a kind of prevision of what is
2

sxvi INTRODUCTION.

about to take place, and they even act upon it with a kind of
certainty that it would take place, for their experience had
assured them that it could be relied upon as prophetic.

I once heard of a physician who had this foresight to such a
degree as enabled him, in many instances, to save life, by acting
in accordance with it. For instance, he once, while riding
home, felt an impression that he was needed in a certain street;
and following the impression, he went directly there, and found
a man who had just been thrown from his horse/and in such a
situation that unless surgical help were immediately applied,
he must have died. And many times he had left his bed at
midnight to visit his patients, guided only by these impressions,
and thus saved the lives of many of his patients.

This kind of discernment is a gift higher than reason ; and
may it not be possible that they are of the nature of these
spiritual gifts, and are but the incipient developments of a law
of our spiritual nature as yet undeveloped, on which these
gifts are founded, which is to be the fulfillment of Joel's
prophecy ?

Objection First. — Mrs. Dixon objected that since the power
of working miracles is included among these gifts, she con-
cluded they must be confined to the apostolic age, since the
day of miracles is past. I reply, if the term miracle must mean
only a suspension of a law of nature, or contrary to nature, I
think with her, that the day is past for such manifestations.
But, if it may bear the interpretation which men of talent and
ability put upon it — viz : that a miracle signifies, and implies a
supernatural power, meaning a power acting in harmony with
a higher than natural law, I think they may, and still do con-
tinue. The law by which these supernatural events take place
is unknown to us, and may be beyond our present ability to
comprehend. For example, had we never seen or known that
a caterpillar could be changed into a butterfly, we should call

INTRODUCTION. xxvji

it a miracle. The facts occurring daily on the telegraphic
wires would have been considered miracles to past generations.
So of eclipses, which were regarded as miracles, until the law of
eclipses was discovered. And I think it will continue to be a
fact, that supernatural events will continue to take place, be-
cause they are the result of laws on a plane of which we are as
yet ignorant. I believe these spiritual gifts are all controlled
by established laws of our spiritual existence, of which we are
at present comparatively ignorant. I fully believe God never
acts except in harmony with established laws, and is never
compelled to break these laws to bring about his purposes.

Objection Second. — Deacon Merrick objected,that if this was
the true view, all who believe must have this power ; and since
none do have it as he thought, therefore there can be no true
Christianity in the church.

I reply, that I do not think this a legitimate conclusion —
that because all do not have this power, therefore none do.
Would Deacon Merrick say that because all the blossoms of the
apple-tree do not perfect into perfect, sound, ripe apples, there-
fore none do ; or that there are no apples at all ? Or would he
rather say, that each blossom has in it the germ of the mature,
sound apple, which will naturally be developed into fruit, un-
less some accident occurs to prevent it ? So all who have any
degree of saving faith, have that in them which will ultimately
perfect into this vigorous faith, and bring forth some of these
perfected fruits or spiritual gifts. This faith is the natural
outgrowth of human nature — that is, it has that universal
principle of human nature, viz : trust or confidence, for its
foundation to rest upon. We can no more get faith without
this principle of human nature to build it upon, than we can
get apples without soil to support the tree ; and no more is the
soil a sinful article because it is natural, than is human nature
sinful because it is natural. Both the nature, and the precious

Xxviii INTRODUCTION.

germinated spiritual fruits upon it, are part of God's well done
work, and therefore are both equally good in their places. But
for lack of proper cultivation this kind of fruit is rarely
brought to perfection in this life.

Another illustration. I once heard the J£ev. Joseph Cooper,
a Congregational minister, of Salem, Iowa,, relate the follow-
ing fact, which took place when he served on board a vessel,
on the coast of Norway. His captain found himselt utterly
unable to navigate the ship through a very dangerous channel
between an island and the main land. A pilot on board see-
ing the very dangerous condition they were in, volunteered his
services to the captain, assuring him he could take the ship
safely through. The captain accepted the offer, although not
without some misgivings as to the ability of this stranger pilot.
But confident he could not guide it himself, he felt compelled
to accept the offer. Consequently he resigned his ship entirely
to this pilot's control, and directed his men to follow ail this
new pilot's directions.

The pilot accepted his charge, and commenced by reversing
all the captain's orders, and headed the ship towards the break-
ers on shore. This aroused the captain's fears. Still he could
do nothing but submit. But very soon his fears became so
much aroused, in view of their approach towards the breakers,
that he ventured to tell his pilot that they were going into the
breakers. "I know it!" was his only reply, and still ap-
proached the breakers. The captain expostulated with him
three times, and each time received the same answer, " I know
it ! " For a time the captain paced the deck in agony, wring-
ing his hands, until at length becoming desperate, he deter-
mined to take the ship into his own hands, confident that
his professed pilot was unworthy of confidence, and was just in
the act of doing so, when, behold ! the pilot turned the ship
about, and soon brought it out of all danger.

INTRODUCTION. xxix

He afterwards found that the pilot had turned ihe ship at
just the point, and the only point, where it could he done with-
out being wrecked, for there was a narrow channel of rocks
beneath, which the pilot knew how to follow ; but the least
deviation from that course would have been destruction to the
ship, and an attempt to turn before the right point was
reached would have been not only impossible, but certain
destruction.

Now this captain had only just faith enough in his pilot to
save him. He did not have that degree of faith needed to
raise him entirely above his fears, in view of dangers so ap-
parent to his reason. This degree of faith demanded the
exercise of even a higher faculty than his reason, for it appar-
ently conflicted with reason. But gospel faith, in its highest
exercise, never conflicts with reason, although it sometimes
transcends reason. But the different gradations of faith, from
the mere saving faith to that all-conquering faith, which al-
lays all anxiety and solicitude, under the most adverse circum-
stances, depends upon the different organizations and sur-
roundings which determine its development and growth. And
all these manifold variations and gradations are ultimately to
perfect into that sound and vigorous faith which Christ incul-
cated, and is the stock upon which all these spiritual gifts
germinate into natural fruit.

QUESTIONS FOR THE CLASS.

The following are some of the questions I proposed to the
class for discussion, some of which were allowed to be dis-
cussed, and many were not :

1. Do true Christians ever die with unrepented sins upon
them ?

2. Does death, which is merely a natural law of the body,

£XX INTRODUCTION.

affect the spirit ; or does the extinction of merely animal life
produce any change in our spiritual life ?

3. Is it not the spirit that repents ?

4. Why then cannot the spirit repent when disconnected
from the body ?

5. Does the truth ever change ?

6. Can people have a difference of opinion on the same sub-
ject, and yet all be correct ?

7. What causes this diversity of belief?

8. Will all equally good people see the truth in just the
same light ?

9. How ought we to treat those who we think teach error?

10. Should we accede to the errorist the same right of
opinion we do the advocates of truth ?

11. Are we to expect new moral truths to be developed at
the present day, since the canon of scripture is complete ?

12. Does progress in knowledge necessarily imply a change
of views ?

13. Is not the platform ol common sense the platform for
a common religion to stand upon ?

14. Are bigotry and intolerance confined to any one church,
or is this " Great Beast" found in all churches ?

15. Can there be " one Lord, one faith, one baptism," with-
out a mutual yielding ot sectarian views among all denomina-
tions of Christians ?

16. Have we any reason to expect that a Christian farmer,
as a Christian, will be any more successful in his farming op-
erations than an impenitent sinner ? or, in other words, does
the motive with which we prosecute our secular business, have
anything to do with the pecuniary results ? And if not, how
is godliness profitable ?

If any of my readers would like to see my answer to the
sixteenth question, I could refer them to my second volume,

INTRODUCTION. xxxi

where they will find it in connection with a full account of
my jury trial before Judge Starr, of Kankakee city, where my
sanity was vindicated : and my persecution is there demon-
strated to be the triumph of bigotry over the republican prin-
ciples of free religious toleration.

This trial was not allowed me until after an imprisonment
of three years, when, by the decision of the court, it was found
that I had not been insane, and thereby had been falsely im-
prisoned all this time. The way in which my incarceration
was secured will be found in the following narrative of facts.

The First Volume delineates the facts of this Persecution
from the time I was kidnapped — through the period of my
incarceration — until I was returned an involuntary victim into
the hands of my husband, with the prospect of being again
imprisoned for life in an Asylum in Massachusetts.

It may be a satisfaction to the readers of this volume to
know, that the facts herein stated have been authenticated and
corroborated by the Illinois Investigating Committee, ap-
pointed by the Legislature of 1867, to investigate and report
the result to the Governor ; which they did on the 2d of De-
cember following. In this Report, the writer, with others,
were acknowledged as competent witnesses in the following
language, viz. :

" The Committee have entire confidence in the belief, that
all these witnesses had a clear understanding, and compre-
hended, when examined, the obligations of the oath adminis-
tered to them ; and in an unusually intelligent manner testi-
fied to matters within their recollection, and were prudent and
entirely honest, and testified to facts as they believed them to
exist. Neither of them exhibited any appearance of a disor-
dered intellect, moral obliquity, or defective memory ; and,

xxxii INTRODUCTION,

therefore, to reject their testimony, appeared to the Commit-
tee as calculated to defeat an investigation after the truth,
and possibly subvert the ends of public justice."

The object of the First Volume is to delineate the internal
management of Insane Asylums on their present basis, for the
purpose of educating the public mind into the imperative ne-
cessity of a radical change in the treatment of the insane. And
this effort is to be followed by an appeal to the State Legisla-
tures for laws to meet and remedy the evils herein portrayed.

The Secoud Volume continues this narrative of events, by
detailing my imprisonment at my own house — my escape by
the application of the Habeas Corpus — my loss of home, prop-
erty and children — my attempts to defend my own rights —
the success of my struggle in getting the laws of those States
so changed that the personal liberty, property and children of
married women are now protected by law in Massachusetts,
Illinois and Iowa — the nine years work of getting my child-
ren— the re-united family — bringing the narrative down to the
present time, when the family are again dispersed, leaving
me free to prosecute the work of securing such laws in all the
States as will protect the inmates of Insane Asylums, and
Married Women from the abuse of autocratic power.

This entire narrative affords a striking illustration of the
legal disabilities of the insane and married women, both of
which are caused by the legalized use of an autocratic power.
They therefore both require the same remedy, which is —
legislation — such as will hold the Husband and Superintendent
both amenable to the laws of this Republic in the exercise. of
their legal power over the wife and the insane patient.

Let the Government but remove this legalized usurpation
of human rights, and the great cause of Modern Persecution,
as delineated in the subsequent narrative, will be effectually
removed.

Modern Persecution

CHAPTER I.
The Bible-Class.

I am a native of Massachusetts, the only daughter of an
orthodox clergyman of the congregational denomination, and
the wife of a congregational clergyman, who was preaching to
a Presbyterian church in Manteno, Kankakee County, Illinois,
at the time my legal prosecution commenced. At this time
my husband's name became enrolled among the Chicago Pres-
bytery as a Presbyterian clergyman.

My maiden name was Elizabeth Parsons Ware, born Decem-
ber 28, 1816, at Ware, Hampshire County, Massachusetts.
My husband, Eev. Theophilus Packard, born February 1, 1802,
at Shelburne, Franklin County, Massachusetts. We were
married May 21, 1839.

At the time I was kidnapped I had lived with my husband
twenty-one years. We had six children, five of whom were
boys, and one girl. Our oldest child, Theophilus, was at this
time eighteen years of age, and our youngest, Arthur, an infant
of eighteen months. All of the children, except the oldest,
were living at home at the time their mother was kidnapped.

I have been educated a Calvinist after . the strictest sect ;
but as my reasoning faculties have been developed by a
thorough scientific education, I have been led, by the simple
exercise of my own reason and common sense, to endorse
theological views in conflict with my educated belief and the
creed of the church with which I am connected.

In short, from my present standpoint, I cannot but believe

34 MODERN PERSECUTION.

that the doctrine of total depravity conflicts with the dictates
of reason, common sense and the Bible. And the only offence
my persecutors claim I have committed, is, that I have dared
to be true to these my honest convictions, and to give utter-
ance to these views in a Bible-class in Manteno, Kankakee
County, Illinois.

But their popular endorsement by this class, and the com-
munity generally, led my husband and his calvinistic church
to fear lest their church creed might suffer serious detriment
by this license of private judgment and free inquiry ; and as
these liberal views emanated from his own family, and he, de-
clining to meet me upon the open arena of argument and free
discussion, chose rather to use the marital power which the
common law of marriage licenses him to use over my identity,
and under a very unjust statute law in Illinois, then in force,
he got me imprisoned in Jacksonville Insane Asylum without
evidence of insanity and without any trial, hoping, as he told
me, that by this means he could destroy my moral influence
and thereby defend the cause of Christ as he felt bound to do.

About four months previous to my incarceration for religious
belief, I received a most cordial invitation from Deacon Dole,
the teacher of this Bible-class, that I join his class and present
my views for their consideration ; for, said he :

" I find it impossible to awaken any interest in the study of
the Bible ; and since you, Sister Packard, have some views a
little different from our own, I wish you would bring them
forward, and see if we can't get up an interest in our class."

As Mr. Packard was present, I referred this request to him
for a reply, and he remarked, " I think you had better go, wife,
and see if you can help him — I will take care of the babe
during the intermission, so you can be free to go."

I accordingly consented, and the next Sabbath I was found
among his pupils, who then numbered only six men in all. I

THE BIBLE-CLASS. 35

had not the least suspicion of danger or harm arising in any
way, either to myself or others, from thus complying with hib
wishes, and thus uttering some of my honestly cherished
opinions. I regarded the principle of religious toleration as
the vital principle on which our government was based, and
I, in my ignorance, supposed this right was protected to all
American citizens, even to the wives of clergymen. But, alas !
my own sad experience has taught me the danger of believing
a lie on so vital a question.

Mr. Pole allowed his pupils to be regarded as mutual teach-
ers, so that all were allowed to ask questions and offer sugges-
tions. Availing myself of this license, others were encouraged
to follow my example, so that our class soon became the place
of animating discussions, and as our tolerant teacher allowed
both sides of a question to be discussed I found it became to
me a great source of pleasure and profit. Indeed, I never
can recollect a time when my mind grew into a knowledge of
religious truths faster, than under the influence of these free
and animated discussions.

The effect of these debates was felt throughout the whole
community, so that our class of seven soon increased to forty-
six, including the most influential members of the community.

About this time a latent suspicion seemed to be aroused, lest
the church creed be endangered by this license of free inquiry
and fair discussion ; and a meeting of some of the leading
church members was called, wherein this Bible-class was
represented as being a dangerous influence, involving the ex-
posure of the creed to the charge of fallibility.

To prevent this, it was agreed that the tolerant Deacon
Dole must be exchanged for the intolerant Deacon Smith, in
order that free discussion might be effectually put down.
And Deacon Smith suggested, that the way to put down free
discussion was, to put doivn Mrs. Packard !

36 MODERN PERSECUTION.

This lie engaged to do, in case they would install him as
teacher. This being done, the battle commenced, and I found
our license had expired with our kind teacher's resignation.
Ignorant as I was of this conspiracy against the right of pri-
vate opinions, I continued to use this God-given right, as my
judgment and conscience dictated, until I found, by open op-
position, that it was the express object of the change, to
abolish all expression of any views which did not harmonize
with the Presbyterian Church creed. I knew and felt that it
was their determination to fetter me, and bring me into un-
questioning acknowledgment of their doctrines, as the sum
total of all important truths.

Of course I could not do this, and be honest to myself; but
from this point, I had the precaution to put into a written
form, every idea I uttered in conflict with what Deacon Smith
thought orthodox views, so as to avoid being misrepresented ;
and I almost uniformly read these papers to Mr. Packard,
before presenting them to the class, and secured from him his
consent to my reading them.

This digested form of presenting my ideas, tended to in-
crease rather than diminish the interest in favor of my new
views, so that finally after Mr. Packard had given his consent
to my reading my articles, Mr. Smith would refuse to have
them read.

Up to this point, Mr. Packard acted the man, and the
Christian, in his treatment of me. But now came the fatal
crisis when evil influences overcame him !

One afternoon Deacon Smith visited him in his study, and
held a secret interview with him of two hours length, when
he left him a different man. That evening just before retiring
to rest, he remarked in a very pleasant tone :

" Wife, I want to talk with you a little while, come here ! "

I went into his extended arms, and sat upon his lap, and

THE BIBLE CLASS. 37

encircled his neck with my arm, when he remarked in a very
mild tone of voice :

" Now, wife, hadn' t you better give up these Bible-class
discussions ? Deacon Smith thinks you had better, and so do
some others, and I think you had better too."

" Husband, I should be very glad to get rid of the responsi-
bility if I can do so honorably, but I do not like to yield a
natural right to the dictation of bigotry and intolerance, as
Deacon Smith demands ; but I am willing to say to the class
that as Deacon Smith, and Mr. Packard, and others, have
expressed a wish that I withdraw my discussions from the
class, I do so, at their request, not from any* desire to shrink
from investigation on my part, but for the sake of peace, as
they view it."

" No, wife, that won't do — you must resign yourself."
" Won't that be resigning, and that too on a truthful basis ?"
"No, you must tell them it is your choice to give them up."
" But, dear, it is not my choice ! "
" But you can make it so, under the circumstances."
" Yes, I can make it so, by stating the truth ; but I can't
by telling a lie."

" Well, you must do it ! "

" O husband ! how can you yield to such an evil influence ?
Only think ! Here you have pledged before God and man that
you will be my protector, until death part us, and now you are
tempted to become my persecutor ! Do be a man, and go to
the class, in defiance of Deacon Smith, and say to the class :
" My wife has just as good a right to her opinions as you
have to yours, and I shall protect her in that right. You
need not believe her opinions unless you choose ; but she has
a right to defend her honest opinions as well as yourselves.
I shall not suffer her to be molested in this right.

" Then you will be a man — a protector of your wile — and you

gg . MODERN PERSECUTION.

will deserve honor, and you will have it. But if you become
my persecutor and go against me, as Deacon Smith desires,
you will deserve dishonor, and you will surely get it. Don't
l*all into this fatal snare, which the evil one has surely laid
for you."

He construed my earnestness into anger, and thrust me
from him, determining to risk this result at all hazards.

From that fatal time, all good influences seemed to have
forsaken him, and he left to pursue his downward way, with no
power to resist evil or flee from the tempter. Season, con-
science, judgment, prudence, consistency and affection, all, all
directly sunk into the fatal sleep of stupidity or death.

From that point, I have never had a protector in my hus-
band. He has only been my persecutor ! In a few weeks from
that time, he forcibly entombed me within the massive walls
of Jacksonville Asylum prison, to rise no more, if he could
prevent it. He told me he did this, to give the impression
that I was insane, so that my opinions need not be believed,
for, said he, " I must protect the cause of Christ ! "

CHAPTER II.

Evil Forebodings.

About three weeks before my incarceration, Mr. Pacfcaru
came to my room and made me a proposition for withdrawing
from the class. Said he :

" Wife, wouldn't you like to visit your brother in Batavia?"

" I should like it very well, if it is not running from my
post of duty."

" You have not only a perfect right to go, but I think it is
your duty to go and get recruited."

" Very well, then, I will go with the greatest pleasure. But
how long do you think I had better make my visit ? "

" Three months."

" Three months ! Can you get along without me three
months ? and what will the children do for their summer
clothes without me to make them ? "

" I will see to that matter; you must stay three months, or
not go at all."

" Well, I am sure I can stand it to rest that length of time,
if you can stand it without my services. So I will go. But I
must take my baby and daughter with me, as they have not
fully recovered from their influenzas, and I should not dare
to trust them away from me."

" Yes, you may take them."

" I will then prepare myself and them to go just as soon as
you see fit to send us. Another thing, husband. I shall
want ten dollars of my patrimoney money to take with me
for spending money."

40 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" That you can't have."

" Why not ? I shall need as much as that, to be absent
three months with two sick children. I may need to call a
doctor to them ; and besides, my brother is poor, and I am
rich, comparatively, and I might need some extra food, such
as a beefsteak, or something of the kind, and I should not
like to ask him for it. And besides, I have your written
promise that I may have my own money whenever I want it,
and I do want ten dollars of it now ; and I think it is no
unreasonable amount to take with me."

" I don't think it is best to let you have any. I shan't trust
you with money."

"Shan't trust me with money! Why not? Have I ever
abused this trust ? Do not I always give you an exact
account of every cent I spend ? And I will this time do so ;
and besides, it you cannot trust me, I will put it into brother's
hands as soon as I get there, and not spend a cent but by his
permission."

" No, I shall not consent to that."

" One thing more I will suggest. You know the Batavia
people owe you twelve dollars for preaching one Sabbath, and
you can't get your pay. Now, supposing brother i duns ' and
gets it, may I use this money if I should chance to need it in
an emergency ? and if I should not need any, I won't use a
cent of it. Or, I will write home to you and ask permission
of you before spending a dollar of it."

"No, you shall neither have any money, nor have the con-
trol of any, for I can't'trust you with any."

" Well, husband, if I can't be trusted with ten dollars of
my own money under these circumstances, I should not think
I was capable of being trusted with two sick children three
months away from home, wholly dependent on a poor brother's
charities. Indeed I had rather stay at home and not go at
all, than go under such circumstances."

EVIL FOREBODINGS. 41

" You shall not go at all ! " replied he, in a most excited,
angry tone of voice. " You shall go into an asylum."

" Why, husband, I did not suspect such an alternative. I
had rather go to him penniless and clotheless even, than go
into an asylum ! "

" You have lost your last chance. You shall go into an
asylum ! "

Knowing the inflexibility of purpose which characterized
my husband, I knew there was no refuge for me in an appeal
to his humanity, his reason or his affection, for a commutation
of my sentence. I therefore laid my case before our kind
neighbor, Mr. Comstock, who professed to be a kind of lawyer,
and sought his counsel and advice.

Said he : " Mrs. Packard, you have nothing to fear. It is
impossible for your husband to get you into any insane asylum ;
for before he can do this, you must have a jury trial ; and 1
can assure you there is no jury in the country who would pro-
nounce you to be an insane person, for you give every evidence
of intelligence that any person can give."

As this Mr. Comstock had been a constant attendant at our
Bible-class for some time past, and had thereby heard and
seen all the evidence which could be brought against me ; and
as he professed to understand the law on this point, this un-
qualified and positive assertion served to quiet my fears and
anxious forebodings to a considerable degree. But had Mr.
Comstock known the law as it then was, he could not have
made this assertion. He probably took it for granted that
the common principles of justice characterized the Illinois
statute laws, viz : that all its citizens should be allowed a trial
before imprisonment ; but being mistaken on this point, he
blindly led me astray from the truth.

Had I known what Mr. Packard knew, of the legal power
which the law gave the husband to control the identity of the
wife, I "should not have been thus deceived. I did not then

42 MODERN PERSECUTION.

know what I now do, that married women and infants were
excepted in the application of this principle of common justice.
This class were not only allowed to be imprisoned by their
husbands or guardians without any trial, or without any chance
at self-defence whatever, but were also expressly licensed
to imprison them in an insane asylum without evidence of
insanity !

Not knowing that Illinois had legalized this mode of kid-
napping the married women of their State, I had no idea that
my personal liberty depended entirely upon the will or wishes
of my husband.

I therefore returned home with "a feeling of comparative
security, trusting and supposing that upon the principles
of our free government of religious toleration, my rights
of conscience, and rights of opinion were respected and pro-
tected by law, in common with those of other American
citizens.

Still, believing that a most strenuous effort would be made
to fasten the stigma of insanity upon me, by my opponents
in religious belief, I now began to consider what my plea of
self-defence must be when arraigned for trial on insanity,
based upon what they regarded as heresy.

But while my mind was cogitating my plea, and my hands
were busily employed in my domestic duties, I could not help
noticing many singular manifestations in Mr. Packard's con-
duct towards me.

One was from the time my sentence was pronounced, Mr.
Packard left my bed without giving me any reason for this
singular act, and he seemed peculiarly determined to evade all,
and every inquiry into his. reasons for so doing. Still I in-
sisted upon knowing whether it was because of anything I
had done which led him thus to forsake me.

He assured me it was not — adding :

" You have always been kind, and true and faithful to me.';

EVIL FOREBODINGS, 43

While this truthful acknowledgment afforded a kind of
relief to my feelings, it only served to increase the mystery of
the affair still more, and even to this day this mystery has
never been solved in my mind. The only reason he ever
gave me was, " I think it is best ! "

Another thing, he removed my medicine box containing our
family herbs and cordials, from my nursery into his sleeping
apartment, and when I found it necessary one night to give
my little Georgie some lobelia to relieve him from spasmodic
croup, I was obliged to seek for it, and finding it under his bed
instead of its accustomed place, I inquired why he had made
that arrangement, and received the same mysterious reply, " I
think it is best ! "

Another thing, he seemed unaccountably considerate of my
health, insisting upon it that I should have a hired girl to help
me. This arrangement surprised me, all the more, because
I had so often been refused this favor, when I had asked for
it at times when I thought I needed it within a few past
years.

I however found it very easy and pleasant to concur with
this arrangement, which afforded me more uninterrupted time
and thought to devote to my plea.

But there was one thing about it which I did not like, and
that was, to dismiss my girl, just when I had got her well
learned how to do my work, without giving any reason what-
ever, either to me or my girl, for this strange conduct.
But I afterwards found out the reason for dismissing her was,
because she had remarked to a neighbor of ours that :

" I can't see what Mr. Packard does mean by calling his
wife insane ; for she is the kindest and best woman I ever saw
• I never worked for so kind a mistress."

But his summary manner of disposing of my good, kind,
faithful French Catholic girl, and supplying her place with one
of his own church members, an opponent to me in argument,

44 MODERN PERSECUTION.

and she the eldest daughter of the most aristocratic family
in the place, was very peculiar.

This aristocratic Miss Sarah Rumsey, was introduced into
my family as a dinner guest, on whom I bestowed all the at-
tention of the hostess until after dinner, when my girl came
to the parlor to bid me " good bye," saying with tears :

" Mr. Packard has dismissed me."

" Dismissed you ! For what ? "

" I don't know — he simply told me to get my things and
leave, that my services were no longer wanted in his family."

While I was trying to comfort her under this uncivil dis-
charge, Miss Rumsey stepped up and volunteered her services
as " my help."

" My help ! have you come here to be my hired girl ? " said
I, in amazement.

" Yes, I am willing to help you."

" But I wish to understand you — has Mr. Packard secured
your services as my hired servant ? "

"Yes, Mrs. Packard, I have come for that purpose."

" Yery well, then, I will set you to work, and you may look
to him for your wages."

She then followed me into the kitchen, where I gave her my
instructions, and then I retired to my parlor, leaving her to
take her first lesson in practical service in her beloved pastor's
kitchen.

During her term of service, which lasted until I was kid-
napped, about one week from this time, I frequently caught
Mr. Packard and Miss Rumsey and Mrs. Sybil Dole, his sister,
in most earnest conversation, which was always carried on in a
whisper whenever I was within hearing distance, and my pre-
sence seemed always to evoke manifestations of guilt on their
part. I think the theme of conversation at these clandestine
interviews was, my abduction and how it should be secured.

My children now became almost my only companions and

EVIL FOREBODINGS. 45

counselors. The three youngest slept with me, so that I had
their company both night as well as day. I expressed to them
my fears that I might yet be forced away from them, always
assuring them that no power but force should separate me
from them.

They always responded " they will have to break my arms
to get them loose from their grasp upon you, Mother, if they
try to steal our dear mamma from us ! "

Fidelity to the truth requires me to state, however, that Mr.
Packard did succeed in gaining a temporary influence over the
mind of my son, Samuel, ol thirteen years, so far as to induce
him to go against me — taking his own confession as proof —
for his conduct towards me, and mine towards him, remained
unchanged. At this age, his impulses rather than his reason
controlled his actions. He was a very impulsive, and still a
very affectionate child, of a very nervous and excitable temper-
ament. The heart ol this dear child, at this age, was at times
the chosen battlefield for severe contests between the extremes
of good and evil influences. Thus was he sadly exposed to be-
come victimized by the great psychological power of his father.

Three times during the last few weeks preceding my kid-
napping were my slumbers disturbed, by this darling child
coming in his night-clothes to my bedside, about midnight,
and, while pressing his tearful cheek against my own, with his
arms encircling my neck, amid his sobbing and tears, would
whisper in the softest tones :

" Mother, won't you forgive me ? I have been doing wrong
— 1 have been telling lies about you — and I can't sleep till
you forgive me."

" Why did you do so, my child ? "

" Because father hired me to say so — and he said it was not
wrong — but when I think of it alone, I know it is wrong —
and I can't sleep until you kiss me, and say you forgive me."

" Yes, darling, mother will forgive you, most cheerfully, for

46 MODERN PERSECUTION.

I see you are sorry, and are willing to promise me you won't
do so any more, are you not ? "

" Yes, mother, I will promise I won't do so any more."

" Now, darling, dry up your tears — and quiet your little
feelings — and go to sleep, with mother's blessing."

With a light heart would he then imprint his good-night
kiss upon my cheek, and with an elastic step would he grope
his way back up stairs to his bed-chamber to sleep the calm,
quiet sleep of the penitent child, now that his conscience was
relieved of its heavy burden.

When he came the third time, I asked him why he had
broken his promise again.

He replied, " father paid me more money to-day ; and
made me think it was not wrong to do as he told me to do."

" What did he tell you to do ? "

" To tell lies about you, mother."

The mother is thankful that the truth will allow her to add,
that, as the moral faculties of Samuel developed his individu-
ality of character, the good influences secured an almost un-
disputed possession of the citadel of his fond heart, and he has
long since become the noble champion of his mother's cause.

But the filial influence Mr. Packard most feared to cope with,
was my second son, Isaac, then sixteen years old. My oldest
son, Theophilus, was then at Mt. Pleasant, Iowa. Isaac com-
municated to Theophilus the dangers he feared impending over
his mother. Theophilus responded, pledging himself that
should his dear mother ever be put into an Insane Asylum, he
should never rest until he had liberated her. Isaac agreed to this
same pledge of untiring devotion to his dear mother's welfare.

During these ominous days of solicitude and painful fore-
bodings, this tender hearted and devoted son would never
leave for his work in Mr. Comstock's store, without first com-
ing to my room, and, as he would imprint a most loving kiss
upon my lips, he would whisper :

EVIL FOREBODINGS. 47

" Don't feel bad, mother ! keep up good courage — I shall do
all I can for you."

And he did do all he could to stem the rising current, by
rallying influences in my defence. Quite a number of volun-
teers gave him their pledge that his mother never should leave
that depot for an Insane Asylum ; but unfortunately, his father
became acquainted with this fact, and to prevent any co-op-
eration with his mother in the execution of any of his plans
for my deliverance, he issued his mandate that Isaac should
not speak to his mother for one week.

Not knowing that such an injunction had been laid upon
him, I accosted him from my window on his return from his
store, and as usual, inquired after his health. He had been
my patient for some weeks past, having spit blood several
times during this time, and of course I felt a deep solicitude
for his health ; and now when he answered me only by the press-
ure of his fore-finger upon his closed lips, and a significant
shake of his head, I became alarmed, and anxiously inquired :

" Can't you speak ? "

A shake of the head was his only response.

I rushed to the door to meet him, to ascertain what had
happened, where we met my only darling daughter of ten
years, whom we all called " Sister," to whom he said :

" Sister, I want you should tell mother that father has for-
bid my speaking to her for one week, and that is the reason
I can't answer her questions."

" But how is your breast, my son ? "

" Sister, I want you should tell mother it is worse ; I have
spit more blood to-day.

In this manner, with my daughter for our medium, I ad-
ministered to his physical wants and spiritual comfort for one
week, which term expired one day before my abduction. Dur-
this time he never failed to come to my room or to the win-
dow, before leaving, to bestow upon my lips his loving kiss
of silent, undying affection.

48 MODERN PERSECUTION.

A few days previous to my seizure, Mrs. Dole and Mr.
Packard tried to prevail upon me to let her take my darling
babe home with her for a few days, to rest me from my night
watches with my sick children, to which I foolishly consented,
supposing this offer was only dictated by affection and sym-
pathy for me. I soon became impatient for my babe, and Mr.
Packard allowed me to go to Mr. Dole's with him to see Ar-
thur, but would not allow me to bring him home with me.
They must keep him a day or two longer ! I must consent to
take a few more nights of good sound sleep before I could
embrace my darling babe once more !

Alas ! this was the final parting with my precious darling
infant, weaned from the breast but three months before.

His little arms could hardly be unclasped from my neck,
to which he seemed to cling instinctively ; with the tender-
est affection he would press his soft cheek against mine, and
say:

" Dear mamma ! Dear mamma ! "

These were the only words he could articulate. 0 ! little
did I suspect this was a treacherous act of false affection, to
steal from me my darling babe.

But so it proved to be !

This was Saturday. On Sabbath they stole from me my
only daughter, by a similar act of nypocrisy. After meeting
Sabbath evening, the Rumsey carriage called at our door and
claimed the privilege of taking my daughter home with them
to visit her intimate friend and school-mate, the youngest
Rumsey. They plead that her health needed a change, and
she could come home any day I chose ; and in answer to my
inquiry :

" Has this anything to do with my being taken off? "

They all with united voices, insisted that it had not, adding :

" This is not our most distant thought."

I at length reluctantly consented to her going, and we too,

EVIL FOREBODINGS. 49

parted for the last time before my abduction, little suspecting
it to be so. But as we were embracing each other for the last
time, she whispered in my ear :

" Mother, if there are any signs of taking you away, you
will let me know, won't you ? "

" Certainly I will, my daughter, you may rely upon your
mother's promise in this thing. So set your heart at rest, and
enjoy yourself as best you can."

And we parted !

That night I had no one to caress but my darling Georgie,
of seven years, who was now nearly recovered from his lung
fever. But from some unknown cause, sleep was not easily
courted that night. Usually my sleep was sound, quiet and
refreshing. Sleepless, wakeful nights were unknown to me.
But now some evil forebodings assured me all was not right.

About midnight I arose and silently sought Mr. Packard's
room, to see if I could make any discoveries as to the aspect
of things. Here instead of being in his bed, I found him
noiselessly searching through all my trunks and bandboxes.
What could this mean ? Without his observing me, I went
back to my bed, there to consider this question.

Before morning my suspicions assumed a tangible form. I
summoned Isaac early to my bedside, to tell him I was sure
arrangements were being made to carry me oif somewhere, and
therefore I wished him without delay to go and get " Sister"
home, as I promised to send for her in case of any appear-
ances of this kind.

He replied, " Mother, I will do so ; but I must first go of an
errand on to the prairie for Mr. Comstock, and then I will
return to the house and take you to ride with me to Mr. Rum-
sey's and get Sister."

" Yes, that will do : we will go by brother Dole's too, and
get my baby. I will be all ready when you return, to go with

you."

3

50 MODERN PERSECUTION,

" One thing more, my son, Imay'need your assistance in pre-
serving my Bible-class papers. Last night I put them into a
small box, and hid them in the wardrobe of my room, where
they now are. Now, my son, these papers may be your
mother's only means of self-defence, and unless we can evade
Mr. Packard's search, he may deprive your mother of this last
and only means of vindicating her sanity. If, my son, I am
ever kidnapped and you cannot defend me, be sure that you
protect these papers, for they are next to defending me, so far
as my reputation for sanity is concerned. I intend to-day to
put a pocket into my underskirt and carry them about my
person."

" I will certainly regard your request and protect your
papers."

Saying this, he kissed me and left, reassuring me he would
soon be back and take me to ride to Mr. Rumsey's.

This was our parting 1

Little George, ever ready to serve me, ran out into the dewy
grass and picked a saucer of ripe strawberries and bi ought
them to my room, saying as he handed them to me :

" I have picked some strawberries for your breakfast,
mother ; " and he had hardly time to receive his mother's
thanks, when his father called him out to the door, and with
extended hand said :

" Come, George, won't you go with father to the store and
get some sugar-plums ? "

Glad as any boy of his age to get sugar-plums, he, of course,
readily went with his father to get his plums, and also to get
a ride too with his brother off on the prairie !

This was our parting scene !

Thus had my children been abducted, to prepare the way
for the mother's abduction. And now the fatal hour had come
that I must be transported into my living tomb.

CHAPTER in.

My Abduction.

Early on the morning of the 18th of June, 1860, as I arose
from my bed, preparing to take my morning bath, I saw my
husband approaching my door with our two physicians, both
members of his church and our Bible-class — and a stranger
gentleman, Sheriff Burgess.

Fearing exposure, I hastily locked my door, and proceeded
with the greatest despatch to dress myself. But before I had
hardly commenced, my husband forced an entrance into my
room through the window with an axe ! And I, for shelter
and protection against an exposure in a state of entire nudity,
sprang into bed, just in time to receive my unexpected guests.

The trio approached my bed, and each doctor felt my pulse,
and without asking a single question both pronounced me
insane ! Of course, my pulse was bounding at the time from
excessive fright ; and I ask, what lady of refinement and fine
and tender sensibilities would not have a quickened pulse by
such an untimely, unexpected, unmanly, and even outrageous
entrance into her private sleeping room ? I say it would be
impossible for any woman, unless she was either insane or in-
sensible to her surroundings, not to be agitated under such
circumstances.

This was the only medical examination I had. This was the
only trial of any kind I was allowed to have, to prove the
charge of insanity brought against me by my husband to be a
false charge. I had no chance for self-defence whatever.

My husband then informed me that the " forms of law"
were all complied with, and he now wished me to dress for a
ride to Jacksonville insane asylum !

52 MODERN PERSECUTION,

I then asked the privilege of having my room vacated so that
I might bathe myself, as usual, before dressing ; intending to
then secure about my person, secretly, my Bible-class documents,
as all I had said in defence of my opinions was in writing, lest
I be misrepresented. I therefore regarded these documents as
my only means of defence, and had resorted to this innocent
stratagem to secure them ; that is, I did not tell Mr. Packard
that I had any other reason for being left alone in my room
than the one I gave him.

But he refused me this request, saying :

" I do not think it is best to leave you alone in your room."

He doubtless had the same documents in veiw, intending
thus to keep me from getting them, for he ordered Miss
Rumsey to be my lady's maid, as a spy upon my actions. I
dared not attempt to get them with her eye upon me lest she
take them from me, or report me to Mr. Packard, and thus
not only defeat my attempt, but also by revealing their place
of concealment, would prevent Isaac from securing them for
me, as he had promised to do in case I should be kidnapped.

I resolved upon one more strategy as my last and only hope,
and this was, to ask to be left alone long enough to pray in my
own room once more before being forced from it into my
prison. When, therefore, I was all dressed, ready to be kid-
napped, I asked to see my dear little ones to bestow upon them
my parting kiss.

But he denied me this favor also.

" Then," said I, can I bear such trials as these without
God's help ? May I not be allowed, husband, to ask this favor of
God alone in my room before being thus exiled from it ? "

"No," said he, " I don't think it is best to let you be alone
in your room."

" 0 ! husband," said I, " you have allowed me no chance for
my secret devotions this morning ; can't I be allowed this one
last request ? "

MY ABDUCTION. 53

"No; I do not think it is best. But you may pray with
your door open."

I asked the Sheriff if I might not be alone in my room a
few minutes.

He replied, " I do not think it is best."

I then kneeled down in my room, with my bonnet and
shawl on, and in the presence and the hearing of the sheriff
and the conspirators, I offered up my petition in an audible
voice, wherein I laid my burdens before my sympathizing
Saviour, as I would have done in secret. Miss Rumsey
reports that the burden of my prayer was for Mr. Packard's
forgiveness. In fact, if I know anything of my own heart,
I do know that it did not cherish a single feeling of resent-
ment towards him. But my soul was burdened with a sense
of his guilt, and only desired his pardon and forgiveness.

My husband then ordered two of his church members to
take me up in their arms and carry me to the wagon, and
thence to the cars, in spite of my lady-like protests, and
regardless of all my entreaties for some sort of trial before
commitment.

I made no physical resistance to this order, but told my hus-
band I should not go voluntarily into an asylum, and leave my
six children, and my precious babe, without some kind of trial.

He replied, "I am doing as the laws of Illinois allow me to
do. You have no protection in law but myself, and I am
protecting you now ! It is for your good I am doing this ; I
want to save your soul ! You don't believe in total depravity,
and I want to make you right."

" Husband, have I not a right to my opinion ? "

" Yes ; you have a right to your opinions if you think right."

" But does not the Constitution defend the right of private
judgment to all American citizens ? "

" Yes, to all citizens it does defend this right. But you are
not a citizen ; while a married woman, you are a legal

54 MODERN PERSECUTION.

nonentity, without even a soul in law. In short, you are dead
as to any legal existence, while a married woman, and there-
fore have no legal protection as a married woman."

I could not then credit this statement, but now know it to be
too sadly true, for the statute of Illinois expressly states that a
man may put his wife into an insane asylum without evidence
of insanity. The law now stands on 96th page, section 10,
of Illinois statute-book, under the general head of " Charities !"
It was passed Feb. 15th, 1851, and reads thus :

" Married women and infants, who, in the judgment of the
medical superintendent (meaning the Superintendent of the
Illinois State Hospital for the Insane) are evidently insane or
distracted, may be entered or detained in the hospital on the
request of the husband of the woman or the guardian of the
infant, without the evidence of insanity required in other cases."

Hon. S. S. Jones, of St. Charles, Illinois, thus remarks upon
this Act : " Thus we see a corrupt husband, with money
enough to corrupt a Superintendent, can get rid of a wife as
effectually as was ever done in a more barbarous age. The
Superintendent may be corrupted either with money or
influence, that he thinks will give him position, place or emol-
uments. Is not this a pretty statute to be incorporated into
our laws no more than thirteen years ago ? Why not confine
the husband at the instance of the wife, as well as the wife at
the instance of the husband? The wife evidently had no
voice in making the law.

" Who, being a man, and seeing this section in the Statute
Book of Illinois, under the general head of ' Charities,' does
not blush and hang his head for very shame at legislative
perversion of so holy a term ? I have no doubt, if the truth
of the matter were known, this act was passed at the special
instance of the Superintendent. A desire for power, I do
not know why it has not been noted by me and others before.

" And we would also venture to inquire, what is a married

MY ABDUCTION. 55

woman's protection under such a Statute law ? Is she not al-
lowed counter testimony from a physician of her own choice,
or can she not demand a trial of some kind, to show whether
the charge of insanity brought against her is true or false ?

" Nay, verily. The statute expressly states that the judgment
of the medical Superintendent, to whom the husband's request
is made, is all that is required for him to incarcerate his wife
for any indefinite period of time. Neither she, her children,
nor her relatives have any voice at all in the matter. Her im-
prisonment may be life-long, for anything she or her friends
can do for her to prevent it. If the husband has money or
influence enough to corrupt the officials, he can carry out his
single wishes concerning her life-destiny.

u Are not the ' Divorce Laws' of Illinois made a necessity, to
meet the demands of the wife, as her only refuge from this ex-
posure to ' false imprisonment ' for life in an insane asylum ?"

This statute law thus coinciding with the nonentity princi-
ple of the common law, demonstrates the truth of Mr. Pack-
ard's statement.

Thus I learned my first lesson in that chapter of common
law, which denies to married women a legal right to her own
identity or individuality.

The scenes transpiring at the parsonage, were circulated
like wild-fire throughout the village of Manteno, and crowds
of men and boys were rapidly congregating at the depot, about
one hundred rods distant from our house, not only to witness
the scene, but fully determined to stand by their pledge to my
son Isaac, that his mother should never leave Manteno depot
for an insane asylum.

The long two-horse lumber wagon in which I was conveyed
from my house to the depot, was filled with strong men as my
body guard, including Mr. Packard, his deacons, and Sheriff
Burgess, of Kankakee city, among their number. When our
team arrived at the depot, Mr. Packard said to me :

56 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" Now, wife, you will get out of the wagon yourself, won't
you ? You won't compel us to lift you out before such a large
crowd, will you ? "

" No, Mr. Packard, I shall not help myself into an asylum.
It is you who are putting me there. I do not go willingly,
nor with my own consent — I am being forced into it against
my protests to the contrary. Therefore, I shall let you show
yourself to this crowd, just as you are — my persecutor, instead
of my protector. I shall make no resistance to your brute
force claims upon my personal liberty — I shall simply remain
a passive victim, helpless in your power."

He then ordered his men to transport me from the wagon
to the depot in their arms.

Before this order was executed, I addressed the sheriff in
these words :

" Mr. Burgess, won't you please have the kindness to see that
my person is handled gently, for I am easily hurt, and also see
that my clothing is so adjusted as not to expose me immod-
estly, which with my hoops I fear you will find some difficulty
in doing."

" I will heed your requests, Mrs. Packard," he kindly re-
plied.

He then ordered two men into the wagon, to lift me from
the board seat, which was placed across the top of the wagon,
and hand me over the wheel, gently down into the arms of two
men, who stood with outstretched arms below to receive me,
and transport me into the " Ladies'-Room " at the depot.

This order was executed in as gentle and gentlemanly a
manner as it could be done, while the faithful sheriff carefully
adjusted my clothing as best he could, and I was landed upon
a seat in the " Ladies'-Room."

I then thanked Mr. Burgess and my carriers for the kind
manner in which they had executed my husband's order ; and
they left me, alone ! to join the crowd on the platform.

I then arose, adjusted my dress and walked to the window,

MY ABDUCTION. 5f

to sco who were there assembled. I saw they were my friends
and foes both, about equally divided, the countenances of all
equally indicating great earnestness and deep emotion.

Soon Mr. Packard came alone into the room, and I resumed
my seat when, bending over me, he addressed me in tones the
most bland and gentle, as follows :

" Now, wife, my dear ! you will not make us carry you into
the cars, will you ? Do please just walk into them when they
come, won't you, to please me ! Do now, please me this once ;
won't you ? "

Looking him full in the face, I said :

" Mr. Packard, I shall not. It is your own chosen work
you are doing. I shall not help you do it. If I am put into
the cars, it will not be my act that puts me there."

He then left me, and soon returned with Mr Comstock at
his side, when he said :

" Now, wife, Mr. Comstock thinks you had better walk into
the cars, and you know you think a good deal of him ; you
will follow his advice, won't you ? "

" Mr. Comstock is too much of a man to advise me to leave
my dear little children, to go and be locked up in a prison with-
out any trial. I know he would not advise any such thing."

Mr. Comstock then, without having spoken one word, left
the room.

While these scenes in the Ladies'-room were being enacted,
Deacon Dole was acting his part on the platform outside.
Finding the crowd had assembled to defend me, and that they
were determined I should never be forced into the cars, his
conscience allowed him to be the bearer of a lie from Mr.
Packard to the company, on the plea that the interests of his
beloved pastor and the cause of the church required it as an
act of self-defence. He therefore positively told them that
Mr. Packard was pursuing a legal 'course in putting his wife
into an Asylum — that the sheriff had legal papers with him to

58 MODERN PERSECUTION.

defend the proceeding, and if they resisted the sheriff, they
would be liable to imprisonment themselves.

The crowd did not know that Deacon Dole was lying to
them, when he said the sheriff had legal papers, for he had
none at all, as the sheriff afterwards confessed — adding :

" I went to the Probate Court to take out my legal papers,
and they would not give me any, because I could not bring
forward any proof of insanity which could satisfy them that
Mrs. Packard was insane. Therefore, I ventured to carry out
Mr. Packard's wishes without any papers ! "

Thus the " majesty of the law," added to the sacred dig-
nity of the pulpit, so over-awed this feeling of manliness in
these Mantenoites, that they dared not make a single effort in
defence of me.

Therefore, when the engine whistle was heard, Deacon Dole
found no obstacle in the way of taking me up in his arms, with
the help of another man, and carrying me from the depot to
my seat in the cars, except the difficulty of knowing how to
take hold of me in a modest and gentlemanly manner.

I, however, soon solved this difficulty for him, by suggesting
that two men make a " saddle-seat " with their four hands so
united, that I could sit erect and easily upon it, between them
both. This, with my assistance, they promptly did, and I
quietly seated myself, while Mr. Burgess kindly arranged my
wardrobe for me. While borne along on this human vehicle,
by my manly ( ! ) body guard, my elevated position afforded
me a fine view of the sea of heads below me, and —

" What did I see ? "

Ah ! there was one little boy of thirteen years, with his
straw hat drawn down over his face, as if to hide this spectacle
from his sight, and with both hands to his face, crying piteously :

"Oh ! Mother ! Mother ! do forgive me ! "

It was my darling Samuel, the only one of my precious
group whom his father was not compelled to abduct, to pre-
vent his physical resistance in kidnapping his mother.

MY ABDUCTION. 59

And while I imploringly and silently looked towards this
crowd for that protection and help they had so confidently
volunteered should be extended to me if needed, I looked in
vain ! " No man cared for my soul ! "

Although Mrs. Blessing was walking the platform, wringing
her hands in agony at the spectacle I presented , and in a loud
voice, while the tears were streaming down her cheeks, she
was imploring them to extend to me the help I needed, in
these expressive words :

"Is there no man in this crowd to protect this woman?
Will you let this mother be torn from her children and thrust
into a prison in this style, with none to help her ? 0 ! is there
no man among you ? If I were a man, I would seize hold
upon her ! "

Mrs. Blessing's Lament.

One, one alone, stood by my side,

With pleading hands and voice she cried,

"Is there no help ? Can no one here

Aid now our suffering sister dear ?

Breathes there not here one mother's son

Who dares to aid this injured one1?

Must she from her own sons he torn,

Her darling children left to mourn ?

Crying in vain for mother dear

To wipe away the scalding tear.

Are love and honor both, all dead ?

Oh neighbors ! has your reason fled1?

Can you look on and see her go ,

To the dark maniac's house of woe ? >

Yet raise no voice, no hand, no eye,

To stay that dread calamity !

Throbs here no heart of sympathy 1

Can no one say she shall be free ?

Oh ! in the sacred name of love,

Of liberty, of God above,

By all the tender ties of life,

Spare ! spare ! that deeply suffering wife,

Recording Angel ! can't thou see

A blacker shade of cruelty ? "—Mrs. S. N. B. O.

60 MODERN PERSECUTION.

As soon as I was landed in the cars, the car door was quickly
locked, to guard against any possible reaction of the public,
manly pulse, in my defence. Mr. Packard, Deacon Dole, and
Sheriff Burgess seated themselves near me, and the cars quietly
moved on towards my prison tomb, leaving behind me, child-
ren, home, liberty and an untarnished reputation. In short,
all, all, which had rendered life desirable, or tolerable.

Up to this point, I had not shed a tear. All my nervous
energy was needed to enable me to maintain that dignified
self-possession, which was indispensably necessary for a sensi-
tive womanly nature like my own, to carry me becomingly
through scenes, such as I have described. But now that these
scenes were past, my hitherto pent up maternal feelings burst
their confines, and with a deep gush of emotion, I exclaimed :

"0 ! what will become of my dear chileren ! "

I rested my head upon the back of the seat in front of me,
and deliberately yielded myself up to a shower of tears.

0 ! thought I, " What will my dear little ones do, when
they return to their desolate home, to find no mother there !
0 ! their tender, loving hearts will die of grief, at the story
of their mother's wrongs ! "

Yes, it did well nigh rend each heart in twain, when the
fact was announced to them, that they were motherless !

My sons Isaac and George were just about this time return-
ing from their prairie errand, and this fact was now being
communicated to them, by a gentleman whom they met return-
ing from the depot. When within speaking distance, the first
salutation they heard was :

" Well, your mother has gone."

" What! " said Isaac, thinking he had misunderstood.

" Your mother has gone ! "

Supposing this was only an old rumor revived, lie carelessly
replied :

" No she isn't, she is at home, where I just left her, and T
am now on the way there to take her to ride with me."

MY ABDUCTION. 61

" But she has gone — I just came from the depot, and saw
her start."

Now, for the first time, the terrible truth flashed upon his
mind, that this is the reason George and I have been sent off
on this errand, and this accounts also, for the attentions so
lavishly bestowed upon us this morning by my groom, by my
father, and by Mr. Comstock. Yes, this awful fact at last
found a lodgment in his sensitive heart, when he, amid his
choking and tears could just articulate :

" George ! We have no mother !

Now, George, too, knew why he had been so generously
treated to sugar-plums that morning, and he too burst into
loud crying, exclaiming :

" They shall not carry off my mother ! "

" But they have carried her off! "We have no mother ! "

Here they both lifted up their voices and wept aloud, and
as the team entered the village all eyes were upon them, and
others wept to see them weep, and to listen to their plaintive
exclamations :

" We have no mother ! We have no mother ! "

As they drew near the front of Mr. Comstock's store, see-
ing the crowd settling there, Isaac felt his indignation welling
up within him, as he espied among this crowd some of his
volunteer soldiers in his mother's defence, and having learned
from his informant that no one had taken his dear mother's
part, he reproachfully exclaimed, as he leaped from his
wagon —

" And this is the protection you promised my mother f
What is your gas worth to me ! "

They felt the reproaches of a guilty conscience, and dared
not attempt to console him. Mr. Comstock was the only one
who ventured a response in words. He said :

" You must excuse me, Isaac, for I did what I thought
would be best for you. I knew your father was determined,

62 MODERN PERSECUTION.

and he would put her in at any rate ; and I knew too, that
your opposition would do no good, and would only torment
you to witness the scene. So I had you go for your good ! "

" For my good ! " thought he, "I think I should like to be
my own judge in that matter ! "

He spoke not one reproachful word in reply ; but true to
his promise to protect his mother's papers, he quickly sought
her room to get the box. But lo ! it was gone ! and never
was he allowed to know who took these papers, nor where
they were hidden. Among them was my will and a note of
six hundred dollars, which Mr. Packard had given me for that
amount of my patrimony which my father had sent me a few
years before. This note I have never seen, nor have I ever
had one cent of the money it secured to me.

But George, knowing the direction the cars went with his
mother, ran* on the track after them, determined he never
would return until he could return with his mother rescued
from prison ! He was not missed until he was far out of
hearing, and almost out of sight — he only looked like a small
speck on the distant track. They followed after him ; but he
most persistently refused to return, crying :

" I will get my dear mamma out of prison ! My mamma
shan't be locked up in a prison ! I will not go home without
my mother ! "

He was of course forced back, but not to stay — only until
he could make another escape. They finally had to imprison
him — my little manly boy of seven years — to keep him from
running two hundred miles on the track to Jacksonville, to
liberate his imprisoned mother !

But 0, my daughter! no pen can delineate thy sorrow, to
find thy mother gone ! perhaps, forever gone ! from thy com-
panionship, counsel, care and sympathy! She wept both
night and day, almost unceasingly, and her plaintive moans
could be heard at quite a distance from home.

MY ABDUCTION. 63

"0! mother! mother! mother! " was her almost constant,
unceasing call.

Her sorrow almost cost her her reason and her life.

And so it was. with Isaac. He grieved himself into a settled
fever, which he did but just survive ; and during its height,
he moaned incessantly for his mother, not knowing what he
said. His reason for a time was lost in delirium.

But my babe, thank God ! was too young to realize his loss.
For him, I suffered enough for two human beings.

Here we leave these scenes of human anguish, to speak one
word of comfort for the wives and mothers of Illinois.

Conscious that there had already been innocent victims
enough offered in sacrifice on this altar of injustice, in conse-
quence of these cruel laws of Illinois against my own sex, I
determined to appeal, single-handed and alone, if necessary,
to their Legislature, to have them repealed, and thereby have
the personal liberty of married women protected by law, as
well as by the marital power.

This effort was a complete success, and is fully detailed in
the second volume.

CHAPTER IV.

My Journey.

Sheriff Burgess left our company at Kankakee City ,. twelve
miles distant from Manteno, where he then resided. Not
knowing at that time but that he had the legal papers Deacon
Dole claimed for him, I thanked him, on taking leave, for the
kind and gentlemanly manner he had discharged his duties
as a sheriff in this transaction, adding :

"You have only discharged your duty as a sheriff, therefore,
as a man, I shall claim you as a friend."

And six months from this date, when he called upon me in
my Asylum prison, and inquired so kindly and tenderly after
my comfort and surroundings, I felt confirmed in my opinion
that I had not misjudged him.

Not long after he died, but not until after he had frankly
confessed his breach of trust, as a public officer, in this trans-
action.

As my wounded heart still sought the relief of tears, I con-
tinued to weep on and at length I ventured to express my sincere,
deep anxiety, lest my children would not be able to survive
their bereavement. Mr. Packard and Mr. Dole then both tried
to console me, by assuring me they were left with kind friends
who would take good care of them ; and Mr. Packard said he
had left a written document for each of them, which he thought
would satisfy them, so that they would " soon get over it."

" 0," thought I, " soon get over it! what consolation! to be
told that your children would soon forget you ! "

Nay, verily I am too indelibly united to their heart's tender-
est, deepest affections, to suffer an easy or rapid alienation.

And so it proved — for three years this cruel wound in their
sensitive hearts remained unhealed — they instinctively and pe;\

No. 1.

No. 2.

B£A/£, D£§. Ca/cago

Kidnapping Mrs. Packard.
"Is there no man in this crowd to protect this woman ! " See page 59.
No. 1. — "And this is the protection I No. 2. — "I will get my dear Mamma
you promised my Mother ! What is your out of prison ! My Mamma shan't he
gas worth to me !" See pnge 61. | locked up in a prison !" See page 62.

MY JOURNEY. 65

sistently spurned the mollient he offered to heal it, viz : " their
mother was insane, and therefore must be locked up for her
good ! "

I have been told they would give expression to their feelings
in language like the following, and it being so characteristic of
their natures,, I have no doubt of its truth.

" No," Georgie would say, " mother is good enough now !
and havn't I a right to my mother ? "

" No," Elizabeth would say, " mother is not crazy, and you
know she is not ! I do think father is possessed with a devil,
to treat our good, dear, kind mother as he does. We know our
dear mother is good, for she has never done anything wrong —
she is kind to you, and she is kind to everybody."

The natural, unsophisticated natures of my children, ren-
dered it very difficult for them to see the necessity of locking
up a person, while they were doing good, and had never done
anything wrong !

The philosophy of that kind of insanity, which requires this
to be done, was beyond their comprehension. And even the
maturer minds of my oldest sons, Theophilus, then eighteen,
and Isaac, sixteen, were equally slow in discovering this neces-
sity. In fact, three years was too short a time for their father
to convince these children of this painful necessity.

At length, wearied with these fruitless efforts to get my
children to sanction his course, he finally resorted to the author-
ity of the father to silence them into acquiescence to his views.
He therefore forbade their talking upon the subject, and made it
an act of disobedience on their part to talk about their mother.

This taught them to use hypocrisy and deceit, for Isaac and
Elizabeth would watch their opportunity, in the absence of
their father, to talk upon their favorite theme ; and when Eliza-
beth and Georgie could not evade this order by day, they would
take the hours of sleep and talk in a whisper about me, after
they had retired to bed.

qq MODERN PERSECUTION.

Another agency he employed to wean them from me, was,
he would not allow me to be spoken of in their presence, except
as an insane person, and in terms of derision, ridicule or con-
tempt. But notwithstanding all these combined agencies, he
could not wean them from me, or lessen their confidence in
me, according to his own statement, which he made to Mrs.
Page on one of his yearly visits to the Asylum.

" I never saw children so attached to a mother, as Mrs.
Packard's are to her — I cannot by any means wean them from
her nor lead them to disregard her authority in the least thing,
even now. I cannot even induce them to eat anything which
they think she would disapprove ol. She seems by some means
to hold them in obedience to her wishes, just as much in her
absence as in her presence. This influence or power is more
than I can understand."

Yes, I knew full well that Mr. Packard did not understand
the nature and disposition of my children, and therefore I felt
unwilling to trust them with him.

" But how could I avert this fate ? In no way. I had not
chosen this separation — God's providence had permitted it
against my wishes, and regardless of my prayers to the con-
trary.

" Now, what shall I do ? Shall I murmur and complain at
what I cannot help, and when I know it will do no good ? or,
must I silently submit to this inevitable fate, and trust to the
future developments of providence to unravel this great mys-
tery ?

" Yes, I must submit. I must not complain, while at the
same time, I have a right to use all suitable means for a res-
toration to my family and duties."

Therefore, as the result of this soliloquy, I concluded to
avail myself of the advice given me by my Manteno friends
at the depot, viz :

MY JOURNEY. 67

" Be sure, Mrs. Packard, and tell every one you see that you
are on your way to the Insane Asylum — and for what — for pos-
sibly by this means you may come in contact with some influ
ence that may rescue you."

Knowing that duties were mine and events God's, I deter-
mined to dry up my tears and address myself to this duty.

I announced this determination to Deacon Dole in these
words :

" Mr. Dole, I am not going to cry any more. Crying is not
going to help me. I am going to put on a cheerful counten-
ance, and cultivate the acquaintance of my fellow travelers, and
enjoy my ride the best I can. I may as well laugh as cry, for I
have 'as good a right to be happy as any other person."

" That is right, Sister Packard ; you have as good a right to
be happy as any one, and I am glad to see you smile again."

After changing a few remarks respecting the beauty of the
country through which we were passing, and the delightfully
calm and clear atmosphere, so tranquilizing in its influence
over one's disturbed feelings, I looked about to see who were my
companions, when I met the eye of a young lady, a stranger to
me, whose eyes seemed to fasten upon me with such a penetra-
ting look, that I could hardly. withdraw my own without be-
stowing upon her a smile of recognition. Upon this she bent
forward and extended her hand, saying :

" I am very sorry for you. I see they are carrying you to the
Insane Asylum, and you do not wish to go."

" Yes, that is so, and I thank you for your sympathy ; but I
have concluded not to weep any more about it, as I shall need
all my nervous energies to meet my fate with dignity and self-
possession."

" But you arc not insane ! why do they put you there ? "

" No, I am not insane, but my husband is trying to put this
brand upon me, to destroy my moral influence."

" But why does he wish to destroy your influence ? "

6g MODERN PERSECUTION.

" Because I have defended some opinions in a Bible-class
where he is the minister, which he cannot overthrow by argu-
ment, and now he tells me he is going to make the world be-
lieve that I am insane, so that my opinions need not be believed,
for he says he must 'protect the cause of Christ. ' "

" Don't he think it his duty to protect his wife ? "

" He thinks it his duty to protect her from injuring the
cause of Christ, by locking her up in a prison ! "

" I heard you speak of your children ; how many have you ? "

" Six — five boys and one girl."

" Six children ! and he, their father, taking from them their
mother, simply because you differ from him in opinion ! 0,
'tis too bad ! How I pity you ! "

At this point, she burst into tears, and resting her head upon
the back of my seat, she cried and sobbed, until she had com-
pletely drenched her pocket-handkerchief, when I handed her
one of my own, and she drenched that also.

"0," she said, " you must not go ! You are too good a
woman to be locked up in an Insane Asylum."

I tried to console her, by telling her I felt it would all come
out right at last — that all I had to do was, to be patient and do
right.

She then put her arm around my neck and kissed me, saying :
" How I wish I could help you ! I will do all I can for you."

She then left her seat and brought back another lady, whom
she introduced as one who wished to talk with me.

From her I learned that the sympathy of the passengers was
with me — that some had thought of volunteering in my de-
fence, and this feeling was now gaining strength by the influence
of my first friend's conversation among them. I saw groups
of gentlemen evidently talking together about me — some con-
versed with me, and I had my hopes somewhat raised that
something would be done to restore me to my children, and by
the time the cars reached Tolona, I felt that I was amongst
friends, instead of strangers.

MY JOURNEY. 69

Mr. Packard could not but see that the tide was against him,
for he sat by my side and listened most attentively to every
word, and when opportunity presented, he aimed by self-vin-
dication to counteract every hopeful influence from taking
possession of my mind, by such remarks as these :

" You say, wife, that the Lord prospers those whose ways
please him ; now, judging by this test, who is prospered in their
plans, you or I ? You see I succeed in all I undertake, while
all your efforts are defeated. Now, isn't the Lord on my side?"

" The time hasn't come to decide that question by this test ;
this is only the beginning not the end of this sad drama. You
may be prospered by having your way for a time, only to make
your defeat all the more signal. I do not think it is certain the
Lord is not on my side, simply because I am not now delivered
out of your power. God has a plan to be accomplished, which
requires all this to take place in order to its ultimate success.
But I can't see what that plan is, nor why my sufferings are
necessary to its accomplishment. But God does, and that
faith or trust in the rectitude of his plans, keeps my mind in
peace even now. Neither do I think it is certain the Lord is on
your side, because you have been permitted to have your own
way in getting me imprisoned. The end will settle this
question."

Another attempt at self-vindication appeared in the follow-
ing conversation. Said he :

"You think a great deal of your father, and that what he
does is right ; now, I want to show you that he upholds me in
doing as I now am, and approves of the course I am now pur-
suing, and here is a letter from your own dear father, con-
firming: all I have said."

As he said this, he Handed me an open letter in my father's
own hand-writing, saying :

" Read for yourself, and see what your father says about it."

" No," said I, shaking my head, " I do not wish to read such

70 MODERN PERSECUTION.

a letter from my father, for it would be a libel upon his revered
memory. I know, too, that if he has written such a letter as
you represent, he has had a false view of the case presented
to him. My father would never approve of the course you
are pursuing, if he knew what the truth is respecting it. You
have told him lies about me, or you never would have had his
approval in putting me into an asylum."

Still he persistently urged me to read the letter, so I could
judge for myself. But I would not. This was the only kind
of consolation he attempted to offer me.

We dined at Tolona, where I had the good fortune to be
seated by the side of a very intelligent gentleman, at the head
of the table, whom I afterwards found to be the general freight
agent, who boarded there at that time. He sat at the end of
the table, I sat next him on the side, and Mr. Packard next
to me. This gentleman, in a polite, gentlemanly manner,
drew me into a free and easy conversation with himself,
wherein I freely avowed some of my obnoxious views and my
progressive reform principles, respecting the law of health,
physical development, etc.

He expressed his high appreciation of my views and princi-
ples, and remarked :

" These have been exactly my views for a long time, and
now I am happy to find one woman who is willing to endorse
and defend them, and who can do so with so much ability."

The entire attention of our table guests seemed centred
upon our conversation, for all appeared to be silent listeners,
and none seemed to be in any haste to withdraw — the cars
giving us ample time for a full and leisurely taken meal.

I noticed one of the female waiters, a very intelligent-look-
ing lady, seemed almost to forget her duties, so eager was she
to listen to every word of our conversation.

After retiring with my husband to the sitting-room, I recol-
lected the instructions given me to tell all where I was going

MY JOURNEY. 71

had been disregarded at the table, where I ought to have re-
plied to the gentleman's compliment, by saying :

" I am happy to have your approval, sir, for it is for avow-
ing these views and principles that I am called insane, and am
now on my way to Jacksonville, to be entered as an inmate,
to suffer the penalty of indefinite imprisonment for this daring
act ; and this, sir, is my husband, Rev. Theophilus Packard,
of Manteno, who is now attending me there."

This thought did flit across my mind at the table, but the
habitual practice I had acquired of shielding, instead of ex-
posing my husband, led me to resist this suggestion of self-
defence and wise counsel. I saw now my error in yielding
thus foolishly, to this feminine weakness, and I, like Peter,
went out not " to weep bitterly," but to seek to make the best
atonement I could for this sin.

I sought and found that listening female waiter, and asked
her who that gentleman was with whom I held my conversa-
tion at the table. She told me.

" Will you please deliver this message to him ? Tell him
the lady with whom he conversed at the table is Mrs. Packard,
and that the gentleman by her side was her husband, a minis-
ter, who is taking her to Jacksonville, to imprison her for
advancing such ideas as he had so publicly endorsed and ap-
proved at the table."

The woman looked at me in amazement, and exclaimed :
" You are not going into the asylum ! "

" Yes, I am. This very night I shall be a prisoner there."

" But you must not go ! You shall not go ! Come and con-
sult the landlady — she may hide you."

As she said this, she took me by the hand, and led me to an
open door, where, from the threshold she introduced me to a
very kind-looking lady, in these words :

" This is the lady I told you about, and her husband is tak-
ing her to the insane asylum ; can't you help her ? "

72 MODERN PERSECUTION.

Looking at me for a moment in amazement, she said :

" Yes, I will. Come with me and I will hide you."

" No, my kind friend, it will be of no avail. My husband
has the law on his side, and you cannot protect me."

" But I will try. You must not go into an insane asylum.
Come ! and I will shield you."

As she said this, she extended to me her hand, while the tears
of real sympathy were coursing down her cheek. I replied :

" 0 ! sister, I thank you for your kindness and sympathy.
But don't distress yourself for me. I shall be sustained. I
feel that God's providence overrules all, and I know God will
take care of me and my children."

Just as 1 finished this sentence, Mr. Packard stood by my
side, and he with a most respectful bow said :

"Wife, will you go with me to the parlor ? "

I quietly took his arm and bowing to my would-be-protector,
walked with him to the parlor, where I remained seated by
his side until the train arrived.

On the cars I met again my Valiant female defender, who
informed me that her advisers had decided that there was no
way to rescue me from my husband's hands ; but that it was
certain that a lady like myself would be retained at the asylum
but a very short time, and would soon be restored to my
children and liberty again.

After thanking her most cordially for her help and sympa-
thy, we kissed and parted, never to meet again, unless in the
unknown future.

Now my last hope died within me, and as the gloomy walls
of my prison could be but indistinctly defined by the gray twi-
light of a summer evening, I held on to my husband's arm,
as he guided my footsteps up the massive stone steps, into my
dreary prison, where by gas-light he introduced me to Dr.
Tenny, the Assistant Superintendent, to be conducted by him
to my lonely, solitary cell.

CHAPTER V.

My Reception.

Yes, here within these prison walls, my husband and I
parted, as companions, forever. He was escorted to the " guest
chamber," while I, his constant companion for twenty-one
years, was entrusted to the hands of my prison keeper to be
led by him to find my bed and lodging, he knew not where,
and to be subject to insults, he knew not what.

While he was resting on his wide, capacious, soft, luxurious
bed, in the stately airy apartment of the Asylum guests, he
did not know that the only place of repose provided for his
weary wife was a hard narrow settee, with no soft pillows to
rest her weary head upon.

But he did know I had no darling babe at my side, but, sol-
itary and alone, I must compose myself to sleep, not knowing
at what hour of the night my room might be entered, nor by
whom, or for what purpose — for the key of my room was no
longer in my own, nor my husband's hands, but in the hands
of stranger men, and his wife entirely at their mercy.

Yes, this is all the protection I got from the one, for whom I
left all to love, cherish and make happy, in return for his prom-
ised protection. With all the trusting confidence of woman, I
never doubted but he would protect my virtue and my innocence.

Yes, I trusted too he would be the protector of my right of
maternity also, for the dear children I had borne him.

0, could I sleep amid these turbid waters, whose surging bil-
lows so mercilessly swept over my soul thoughts such as these !

But one thought there was, more dreadful to my sensitive
feelings than all others — now these dear children, these dear
fragments of myself, must be exposed to bear the dismal, dread-
ful taint of hereditary insanity, for their mother now lodges
amid the hated walls of an Insane Asylum, as an inmate !
4

74 MODERN PERS ECUTION.

And oh! to whom can their mother now look for protection ?
To whom shall I make complaint if insulted ? Oh, to whom ?

I cannot write a letter unless it is inspected by my men
keepers. Why is this ?

Is it because they intend to insult me and deprive me of my
post-office rights to shield and hide their own guilt ?

But can I not hand a letter clandestinely to the trustees, as
they pass through ? If I could do such a thing, and entered a
charge against their superintendent, would this be heeded ?
Would not this superintendent deny the truth, and defend his
lie by the plea, that his accuser is insane, and this is only one
of the fancies of her diseased brain.

Yes, yes, there is no man, woman, or child, or law, who
now can care for my soul, or protect my virtue !

And yet, while I am an American citizen, I am excluded,
without trial, from society, and then denied any protection by
law of one of my inalienable rights. I am not only outlawed,
but I am absolutely denied all and every means of self-defence,
no matter how criminal, nor how aggravated the offence maybe.

My womanly nature does call for, and need some refuge to
flee to, either to the law, or to man. But here, I have neither.
Should my keeper chance to be a bad man, I have no refuge
but my God to flee to — therefore into Thy hands do I commit
my body for safe keeping this night.

My spirit, and the future of my earthly destiny, I have long
since committed to Thy care, and now protect my body from
harm, and give me the sleep my tired nature so much needs,
and thus prepare me to bear the trials of to-morrow, as well
as I have those of to-day, and Thou shalt have the honor of
delivering me from the power of my adversaries. May no sin
be ever suffered to have dominion over me.

With these thoughts, I fell into a quiet sleep, from which I
awoke not until the morning of my first day in the Asylum
dawned upon me.

CHAPTER VI.

'My First Day of Prison Life.

At an early hour, I arose from my settee-bed, first kneeled
"before it, and thanked my kind Father in Heaven for the re-
freshing sleep I had enjoyed, and asked for sustaining grace
for the duties of the day. To prepare myself for these duties
I took my sponge bath, as usual, since Mrs. De La Hay, my
attendant, had, at my request, furnished me a bowl from her
own room, towels, etc., so that I could take my bath in my
room, as this had long been a habit I very much wished to re-
tain while there. I soon found that she had especially favored
me in granting this request, since it is the general custom
there, to have all the ladies perform their morning ablutions
in the bath-room, and I could not learn that any, except my
attendant, approved of washing all over, daily in cold water,
as I did. And, as a general thing, their toilet had to be pre-
pared before the same common mirror in the bath-room.

Therefore I requested Mr. Packard to furnish my room with
a bowl and pitcher, and a mirror, which he accordingly did,
and before another night, I had a bed prepared like the other
prisoners, which was a comfortable, narrow mattress bed, on
a narrow bedstead. Mrs. De La Hay had done the best she
could the night before, to accommodate me, since the beds in
the seventh ward were all occupied when I arrived.

After finishing my toilet in my room, with the aid of my
own brushes and combs and small mirror, which my traveling
basket contained, I was invited out to my breakfast with the
other prisoners.

At my request my attendants introduced me to my com-
panions, most of whom returned my salutation with lady-like
civility.

Our fare was plain and coarse, consisting almost entirely

76 MODERN PERSECUTION.

of bolted bread and meat, and tea and coffee. But as I drank
neither tea nor coffee, I found it rather dry without any kind
of vegetables, not even potatoes, and sauce or fruits of any
kind. As my diet had consisted of Graham bread, fruits and
vegetables, to a great extent, I felt quite apprehensive lest my
health would materially suffer from so great a change.

Mr. Packard did not, however, now seem to care any more
what his wife had to eat, than where she had to sleep, for so
long as he stayed at the Asylum he was the guest of Dr. Mc-
Farland, whose table was always spread with the most tempt-
ing viands and luxuries the season or the markets could
afford. Mr. Packard did not even allow me the honor of an
invitation to sit with him at this table ; although the night
before, a special meal had to be ordered for us both, he took
his at the Doctor's table, while I had to be sent to the ward,
to eat my warm biscuits and butter there alone.

I felt these indignities, these neglects, these inattentions,
just as any other affectionate, sensitive wife would naturally
feel under such circumstances. But, for twenty-one years I
had been schooling myself to keep under subjection to my
reason and conscience, the manifestation of those indignant
emotions which are the natural, spontaneous feelings which
such actions must inevitably germinate in a true, confiding
wife. Therefore, I made no manifestation of them under these
provocations.

At a very early period in my married life, had I learned
the sad truth that it was impossible for Mr. Packard to appre-
ciate or understand my womanly nature ; therefore I had
habituated myself to the exercise of charitable feelings towards
him in my interpretation of such manifestations. I had tried
to school myself to believe that his heart was not so much at
fault as his education, and, therefore, I could sincerely pray
the Lord to forgive him, for he knows not what he does — he
does not know how to treat a woman.

MY FIRST DAY OF PRISON LIFE. 77

I knew that the least manifestation of these indignant
emotions would be misconstrued by him into feelings of anger,
instead of a natural, praiseworthy resentment of wrong doing.
And the laudable manifestation of these feelings under such
circumstances, would tend to lessen, instead of increasing my
self-respect.

He held me in such relation towards himself as my father
did towards himself, so that any resistance of his authority was
attended with the same feeling of guilt which I would have
felt in resisting my father's authority. And I, like a natural
child, had always felt an almost reverential respect for my
father's authority, and nothing to me seemed a greater sin than
an act of disobedience to his commands ; my conscience even
demanded that I yield unquestioning submission to even the
denial of my most fondly cherished hopes and anticipations.

Mr. Packard had been introduced into our family when I
was but ten years old, and he had been my father's ministerial
companion for eleven years, and when I married him he had
been my lover or suitor for only a few months. Previous to
this time I had only looked upon him as my father's com-
panion and guest, but never as even a social companion of
his daughter, who had always been taught to be a silent
listener to her father's social guests.

This parental training of reverential feeling towards my
father's ministerial guests, had capacitated me to become an
unresisting victim to Mr. Packard's marital power or author-
ity. And as Mr. Packard's education had led him to feel that
this marital authority was the foundation stone of the marriage
union, he, of course, conscientiously claimed, what I was too
willing to grant, viz. : subjection to his will and wishes.

But undeveloped as I then was, my true nature instinctively
revolted at this principle as wrong ; but wherein, it was then
difficult for me to demonstrate, even to my own satisfaction.
But I can now see that my nature was only claiming its just

78 MODERN PERSECUTION.

rights, by this instinctive resistance to this marital authority.
It was the protection of my identity or individuality which I
was thus claiming from my husband, instead of its subjection,
as he claimed. The parental authority, I admit, has a sub-
jective claim, to a degree ; but the marital has only the
authority of protection.

I believe that the moment a husband begins to subject his
wife, that moment the fundamental law of the marriage union
is violated. Both parties are injured by this act — the husband
has taken the first step towards tyranny, and the injured wife
has inevitably taken her first step towards losing her natural
feeling of reverence towards her husband. Slavish fear is con-
jugal love's antagonistic foe — the purest and most devoted
woman's love vanishes before it, as surely as the gentle dew
vanishes before the sun's burning rays. Fortify this love
ever so strongly, this principle of slavish subjection will
undermine and overthrow the most impenetrable fortresses,
and take the victim captive at its will.

So had my conjugal love been led into a most unwilling
captivity by my husband's tyranny, and all the charitable
framework which woman's forgiving nature could throw around
it, could not prevent this captivity, nor redeem the precious
captive, so long as the tyranny of subjection claimed its victim !

But to the triumph of God's grace I can say it, that during
these twenty-one years of spiritual captivity, I do not know
that I ever spoke a disrespectful word to my husband. I
endured the soul agonies of this blighting, love strangling
process silently, and for the most part uncomplainingly. I
could, and cheerfully did do my duty to this usurper, as I
would have done to a husband. But these duties had to be
done from the dictates of settled principle, rather than from
the impulse of true conjugal love.

I hope my impulsive readers will now be prepared to under-
stand that it is not because I did not feel these insults that

MY FIRST DAY OF PRISON LIFE. 79

I did not resent them ; but I had not then reached that stage
of womanly development where I had the moral courage to de-
fend myself by asserting my own rights. This stage of growth
was indeed just dawning upon me ; but 0 ! the dense clouds
attending this dawning of my individual existence !

I had indeed practically asserted one of these inalienable
rights, by not yielding my conscience and opinion to the dic-
tates of creeds or church tyranny.

Yes, I had maintained my rights of conscience in defiance
of the marital power also. And this, too, had been the very
hinge on which my reputation for sanity had been suspended.
As Mr. Packard expressed himself :

" Never before had Elizabeth persistently resisted his will or
wishes — a few kind words and a little coaxing would always
before set her right ; but now she seems strangely determined
to have her own way, and it must be she is insane."

Thus, in my first struggle after my independence, I lost
my personal liberty.

Sad beginning ! Had it not been better for me to submit to
oppression and spiritual bondage, rather than have attempted
to break the fetters of marital and religious despotism ?

No, I cannot feel that I have done either myself or others
the least wrong, in the course I have thus far taken ; there-
fore, I have no recantations to make, and can give no pledges
of future subjection to either of these powers, where their claims
demand the surrender of my conscience to their dictation.

And this is what they call my insanity, and for which I was
sent to the asylum to be cured. I think it will be a long time
before this cure will be effected. God grant me the quietude of
patient endurance, come what will, in the stand I have taken.
While these and similar reflections were passing through my
mind, the door of my cell was opened by a fine-looking gentle-
man in company with Mr. Packard, to whom he introduced me
as Dr. McFarland, the Superintendent. He had but just re-

80 MODERN PERSECUTION.

turned from a journey east, so that Dr. Tenny, the Assistant,
received me.

Dr. McFarland politely invited me to accompany them to
the " reception-room."

I gladly accepted this invitation to be restored to the civili-
ties of civilization, even temporarily.

I seated myself upon the sofa by Mr. Packard's side, and the
Doctor took the big rocking-chair directly in front of us, and
opened a pleasant and interesting conversation, by narrating
incidents of his eastern journey. In a very easy and polite
manner, he led on the conversation to other points and topics
of interest at the present day, and finally to the progressive
ideas of the age, even to religion and politics. He very gal-
lantly allowed me a full share of the time to express my own
thoughts, while Mr. Packard sat entirely speechless.

As the tone and spirit of the conversation rendered it proper,
I recollect I made a remark something like this :

" I don't know why it is, Doctor, it may be merely a foolish
pride which prompts the feeling, but I can't help feeling an in-
stinctive aversion to being called insane. There seems to be
a kind of disparagement of intellect attending this idea,
which seems to stain the purity and darken the lustre of the
reputation forever after."

" No, Mrs. Packard, this is not necessarily so; even some
of the most renowned and gifted minds in the world have
been insane, and their reputation and character are still
revered and respected, such as Cowper and Tasso, the greatest
poets in the world, and many others."

I made no plea of defence in favor of my sanity, and particu-
larly avoided any disparaging or criminating remarks respect-
ing Mr. Packard, but simply let the conversation take the di-
rection the Doctor dictated. But, as 1 then thought fortu-
nately for me, he introduced no topic where I felt at any loss
what to say, to keep up an intelligent interchange of thought

MY FIRST DAY OF PRISON LIFE. 81

and expression. In short, this interview of an hour or more,
was to me a feast of reason and a flow of soul, and it seemed
to be equally so to the Doctor, unless my womanly instincts
very much deceived me.

When I was returned to my ward, and behind the fatal dead
lock, dining with the insane, I must confess I did feel more out
of my proper place, than I did while in the reception room of
refined society.

After noticing the manner in which the institution was con-
ducted for the three succeeding years, I found that the inter-
view I had had with the Doctor was a most uncommon occur-
rence. Indeed, I never knew of a single instance where any
other patient ever had so fair an opportunity of self-represen-
tation, by a personal interview upon their reception into the
Asylum, as he had thus allowed me. They are usually taken,
forthwith, from their friends in the reception-room, and led
directly into the ward, as Dr. Tenny had done by me the night
before. But unlike my case afterwards, there they were left
to remain indefinitely, so far as an interview with the Doctor
was concerned.

Many patients were received and discharged, while I was
there, who never had five minutes conversation with the
Doctors while in the Asylum. Often the new arrival would
come to me and inquire :

" When am I to have an examination ? "

I would reply, " You never have an examination after you
get here, for the Doctor receives you on the representation of
those who want you should stay here."

" But I never had any examination before I came, and even
did not know where I was being brought, until I got here, and
then my friends told me I should have an examination after I
arrived.' '

" I believe you are speaking the truth ; for public sentiment
seems to allow, that one whom we wish to regard as insane,
4*

32 MODERN PERSECUTION.

may be deceived and lied to to any extent with impunity ;
and besides the blinded public generally suppose that the in-
mates do all have to pass an examination here before they are
received, which is not the fact. They take it for granted that
all are of course insane, or they would not be brought here, as
Dr. Tenny said of me to Mrs. Waldo, in reply to her inquiry:

"Dr. Tenny, do you call Mrs. Packard an insane person? "

" Of course I do, or she would not be brought here," was
his reply.

And then the outsiders say, " Of course they are insane, or
they would not have been received."

Thus our insanity is demonstrated beyond a question !

After dinner I saw from the grated window of my cell, the
Asylum carriage drive up in front of the steps, when Mr.
Packard was politely handed in, and the carriage drove off.
Upon inquiry, I found he had gone to ride, to see the beauties
of the scenery about Jacksonville, and the public buildings
and handsome residences.

" Oh," thought I, " why could he not have invited me to ride
with him ? And how could he seek comfort for himself, while
he left his wife amid scenes of such wretchedness ? "

Not long after, my attendant came to my room and invited
me to take a walk. I most gladly accepted the invitation,
struggling and panting as my spirit was, for freedom ; and I
found that the pure air alone exerted an exhilarating influence
over my feelings, and I with another prisoner, proposed to
walk about the buildings, to see the grounds, etc.

But we soon found ourselves followed by our watchful
attendant, to see if we were not trying to run off!

uOh," said I, " is this the vigilance that I am subjected to?
Is there no more freedom outside of our bolts and bars, than
within them ? Are we not allowed to be paroled like prisoners ?"

" No, no. No parole of honor is allowed these prisoners, for
not one moment are we allowed to be out of sight and hearing
of our vigilant attendant. And these are the walks and cir

MY FIRST DAY OF PRISON LIFE. 83

cumscribed limits Mr. Packard has assigned his wife, while
he can roam where he pleases, with none to molest or make
him afraid."

It is my opinion that this institution receives and retains
many sane persons, of whose sanity Dr. McFarland is as well
assured as he was of my own. I do believe that he became
fully convinced in his heart that I was not insane, before our
interview terminated, for he once plainly intimated he never
should have received me had be been at home. But since I
had been already received by his assistant, he did not like to
revoke his decision so abruptly as to return me directly into
my husband's hands ; neither did he wish to disappoint the
wishes nor thwart the plans of a very respectable and popular
minister of high standing in the Presbyterian church, for by
this act he might possibly alienate some popular influences
from his support ; and one other thought may have had some
influence over this decision (and will not my reader pardon
my vanity if I mention it ?) namely, I think the intelligent
Doctor thought he would like to become better acquainted
with me.

By thus retaining me for a few days, he felt that I could
then be returned to the satisfaction of all parties.

His subsequent polite attentions, and the remark he made
to me at one of these interviews, viz. : " Mrs. Packard, you
will not remain here many days," in connection with a remark
he made Mrs. Judge Thomas, of Jacksonville, respecting me,
has led me to feel that I did not then misjudge him. The re-
mark was this :

" Mrs. Thomas, we have a very remarkable patient now in
our Asylum. It is a Mrs. Packard, a clergyman's wife, from
Massachusetts. She has a high order of talent, has a very su-
perior education, is polished and refined in her manners, having
ever moved in the best society, and is the most intelligent lady
I ever saw. I think you would like to make her acquaintance."

CHAPTER VII.

The Parting Scene.

The next day I had a brief interview with the Doctor alone
in my room, which was very pleasant and satisfactory to me —
that is, I thought he could not think I was an insane person,
therefore I had a little ray of hope to cling to, as Mr. Packard
had not yet left. Dr. McFarland did not exchange a word
with me upon this subject. But this dying hope was destined
very soon to go out in utter darkness.

About three o'clock in the afternoon, Mr. Packard came the
second time to my room, and as he had allowed me to be in
his company only during the interview I had with the Doctor,
during the two days and nights he had been in the Asylum, I
felt it to be a privilege to accept of his invitation to go to the
reception-room and have a talk with him there.

I accordingly took his arm, without its being offered, and
walked out of the hall. As we passed on, I heard some one
remark :

" See ! that lady is not alienated from her husband. See
how kindly she takes her husband's arm."

I seated myself by his side on the sofa, when ne said :

" I am going to leave for Manteno in about one hour, and I
did not know but that you would like to have a talk with me
before I left."

" Then you are determined to leave your wife in an Insane
Asylum ! Oh, husband ! how can you do so ? "

I then burst into tears.

"I hoped we should have a pleasant interview before we
parted."

m " Pleasant ! How could it be pleasant to leave me in such a
place ? And do you think it will be pleasant for me to be left ?
Only think of those dear motherless children ! "

How can I Live without my Children ! " See page 85.

No. 2. — Abducting my Daughter. See

No. 1. — Abducting my Babe. See p. 48.
No. 3. — My Isaac's parting kiss. See
page 50.

page 40.
No. 4.-- Abducting my George. See p. 50.

THE PARTING SCENE. 85

" I shall see that they are well taken care of."

" But 7011 cannot give them a mother's care. Oh how can
my children live without their mother ! And how can I live
without my children ! "

As this strong maternal feeling of my nature came welling
up into such a high pitch of intensity, it seemed as if my heart
would burst with anguish, at this hitherto unaccepted thought.
I arose, and, with my handkerchief to my face, I walked the
room back and forth, at the same time begging and pleading
in the most plaintive, expressive terms, that he would com-
mute my sentence of banishment, so far as not to separate me
from my children.

" Oh, do be entreated in some way, to allow me this one favor,
and my grateful, thankful heart will bless you forever. Oh, it
will kill me to be separated from those dear ones ! My babe !
Oh, what will become of him ! and what will become of me
without my babe ? Oh, husband, do ! do ! let me return with you
to my children ! You know I have always been a kind and
faithful mother and wife, too, and now, how can you treat me
so?"

For some time I walked the room, giving utterance to such
and similar expressions, without raising my eyes, or noticing
the effect my plea was having upon him ; but after a long-
pause, and vainly watching for his reply for some time, I looked
up to see why he did not speak to me, when lo ! what did I
see?

My husband sound asleep on the sofa, nodding his head !

In astonishment, I indignantly exclaimed :

" Oh husband ! Are you asleep ? Can you sleep when
your wife is in such agony ? "

The emphatic tones of my voice brought him back to con-
sciousness, when he raised his head, and opening his eyes,
replied :

" I can't keep awake ; I have been broken of my rest."

86 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" I see it is of no use to say anything more — it will avail
nothing. We may as well part now as ever."

Saying this, I walked up to him and extended to him my
hand, and as I did so, I said :

" Farewell, husband, forever ! May our next meeting be in
the spirit land ; and if there you find yourself in need of help
to rise to a higher plane, remember there is one spirit in the
universe, who is willing to descend to any depth of misery, to
help you on to a higher plane, if this can be done — and this
spirit is your Elizabeth. Farewell, husband, forever ! "

"lam sorry to hear you talk so ; I hoped we should have a
pleasant parting."

This was our parting scene !

Now, let me introduce to my reader a scene in the Doctor's
office, which succeeded this. Leaving me in the reception
room, he repaired to the office, to take his leave of the Doctor.

Now, it was his turn to cry !

Availing himself of this right, he now burst into a flood of
tears, which so choked his utterance, it was some minutes be-
fore he could articulate at all, when he at length exclaimed :

" How I pity my wife ! How hard it is to leave her here !
Oh, if I only were not obliged to do so, how gladly I would take
her home ! She is such a good wife, how can I part with her ?
But I must do so, hard as it is, for her good."

Thus he went on, acting this part of the drama to perfec-
tion. Indeed, so well, and adroitly did he act the husband,
that the intelligent Dr. McFarland himself was deluded into
the belief that he was sincere, and that these were the tears
of true sorrow and affection.

Alluding to this scene months afterwards, he remarked :

" I never saw a man so deeply afflicted, and even heart-
broken, as Mr. Packard was at parting with you. He was the
most heart-broken man I ever saw. If ever a man manifested
true affection for his wife, it was Mr. Packard."

THE PARTING SCENE. 87

Yes, he so completely psychologized the Doctor into the
feeling that he loved me most devotedly, and was compelled,
in spite of himself, to incarcerate me, that the Doctor felt
certain there had been a justifiable cause for my having been
brought there.

Satisfied that his work was now well done, he took his leave
of the Doctor, and his tears at the same time ! and with a light
heart and quick step, passed out on to the porch, where he
stopped to give me one look of satisfied delight, that he had
finally completely triumphed, in getting me imprisoned beyond
all hope of deliverance.

Never had I seen his face more radiant with joy, than when
he looked up to me, as I stood before the open window of
the reception room and threw me his kisses from the ends of
his fingers, and bowed to me his happy adieu.

Yes, happy that his conspiracy against my personal liberty
had so completely triumphed over all opposition.

Having secured the entombment of the mother, he had now
naught to do but to teach her children to despise their mother,
and treat her name and memory with contempt and derision.

CHAPTER VIII.

Disappointed Hopes.

Mr. Packard has gone ! My last hope of deliverance through
him, has now sunk into a rayless night of despair. Yes, utter
despair of ever being liberated and reinstated in my family
again. He has not so much as even uttered one syllable on
which I could build such a hope. I never have heard him even
say, he hoped I should ever get better, so as to be with him
once more. What can this mean ? Has he buried me for life ?

Yes, so his conduct speaks, and no word or act contradicts
it. Hopeless imprisonment ! Oh, may my reader never know
what these terms signify. I know what it is to endure endless
torment, and hopeless bondage ! And it is a terrible doom.

I did try to build a faint hope upon the fact that he had
brought only a small satchel of things with me, and these could
not last me long ; but before he left, he dashed this hope to the
ground by telling me he should send me my trunk, after he got
home. In about three weeks, there did arrive a monstrous sized
trunk directed to Mrs. Packard, which led the patients to
exclaim :

"Is Mr. Packard going to keep his wife here for life ? "

And how did my sad heart echo this fearful question.

But even amid this gloom, one ray of comfort gleamed forth
at the thought, now I shall hear from my dear children. They
surely will send some token of love, and affection to their im-
prisoned mother. And to enjoy this comfort to its fullest
extent, I asked the Doctor to allow me to unpack it in my own
room, with the door locked. He kindly locked me in himself,
seemingly rejoicing in my anticipated joy.

My first surprise on opening it, was to see so few articles of
clothing, and these of the very poorest kind, and in a state of
the most tangled confusion, with rotten lemons and cans of

DISAPPOINTED HOPES. 89

fruit scattered amongst them to their detriment, poor as they
were. The whole contents would not fill one-third of the
trunk, and this caused the confusion. And why he should
send so large a trunk to carry so few articles, has always been
an unsolved mystery to me.

But this feeling was soon lost in the bright thought of soon
finding my children's love tokens. Each and every article
was most carefully searched, to find what would be next
to finding my child, for his own fingers must have held it
and kissed it for his mother.

But ah ! must I utter the sad truth, that no token, no letter
could be found, on which my fond heart could rest its loving
impulses ? Yes, so it was ; and being alone, I wept in deepest
anguish at this disappointed hope.

My sons afterwards told me that they all expressed a wish to
send me a letter and many tokens, but their father had refused
to let them do so unless he should dictate the letters. Isaac
said he knew that to get such a letter as his father would
dictate, would pain me more than it would to get none at all.

And so it would have been, for on a narrow strip of paper,
four inches long and two wide, I found penciled :

" We are glad to hear you are getting better ; hope you will
soon get well. Your daughter Elizabeth."

This her father made her write to make me feel that she
believed me insane ; and he knew nothing would torment me
so much as this thought from her. Indeed, I found that what
Isaac had said was too true. I was more pained to get this
line from my daughter than I would have been to get none at
all ; for not knowing the truth, I did fear she was coming
under the influence of this delusion.

I think the Doctor pitied me under this trial, for the next
day, when, in reply to his questions, I told him I found no
letters, or love tokens, or messages from my children, be
seemed astonished, and said :

90 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" I thought you would find many letters. I wonder they
did not write to their mother."

Another disappointment. I had especially requested Mr.
Packard that my nice black silk dress and white crape shawl
be sent, so that I could go to church decently dressed. But
not only these, but all my other good articles of clothing were
kept from me, not only while I was in the asylum, but long
after I was liberated ; and then he was forced to give them
up upon my father's authority.

Now my only hope cf deliverance lay in the Mantenoites
fulfilling their promise to get me out in a few days. Every
carriage and man was watched, hoping to find in him my de-
liverer. But none came, until several weeks, when I was called
from Mrs. McFarland's parlor into the reception-room, to see
Mr. and Mrs. Blessing, from Manteno, and a stranger, to
whom they introduced me as Dr. Shirley, of Jacksonville.

Dr. Shirley took the lead in the conversation, and I was de-
lighted at the compliment he paid me in introducing subjects
such as required intelligence and scientific knowledge to con-
verse upon. Our pleasure in sustaining such an interchange
of thoughts seemed to be mutually reciprocated, and I think
we both parted feeling that we were wiser than when we met.

In reply to their inquiry :

" Is she insane ? "

" She is the sanest person I ever , saw. I wish -the world
was full of such women."

Now that my sanity was established beyond question, the
Mantenoites resolved to liberate me, and therefore appointed
a public indignation meeting for this purpose, to see what
could be done to effect it.

Mr. Packard hearing of this proposed meeting to liberate his
imprisoned wife, sent to Chicago and obtained Rev. A. D. Eddy,
D. D., and Mr. Cooley, of the firm of Cooley & Farwell, to come
to Manteno and help him to withstand and defeat this

DISAPPOINTED HOPES. 91

philanthropic plan. They both came and did their work up
thoroughly and successfully, in that they browbeat the Man-
tenoites, and silenced them into submission to the dictates
of this ministerial and church influence.

Thus this plan was defeated, and I was destined to another
disappointment.

Mr. Blessing told me clandestinely, he had come to effect
my liberation if possible.

But these Mantenoites determined that their defeat should
not be a failure, and therefore they determined to try the habeas
corpus act, and thus secure me a fair trial at least.

But to their surprise, they found it exceedingly difficult, if
not impossible, to extend this act to a legal " nonentity," un-
less by the consent of Mr. Packard, who stood for me in law,
and of course he would not consent to any step which would
allow me any chance at self-defence.

Therefore, with the encouragement and assistance of his
brother ministers, and the church, he learned how to ward
off this attempt successfully.

Again the Mantenoites assembled, and by their generous
contributions raised a liberal purse of money, to be used in my
defence. They sent a delegation to the asylum, to inform me
of this fact, which they did, by carefully noting the time the
Doctor's back was turned, to inform me as they walked
through the prison halls. Said they :

" Any amount of money you can have, if money can help
you. Send to your son, Theophilus, to take you out."

I simply had time to reply, " I can't send letters out."

This was all we could say clandestinely. Although I could
see no hope of deliverance through this source, yet the thought
that I was being cared for by any one outside my prison, was
a great consolation to me.

Through the influence of friends, my oldest son, Theophilus,
visited the asylum, and obtained an interview with me.

92 MODERN PERSECUTION.

When I was incarcerated in my prison, Theophilus was
in the post-office in Mount Pleasant, Iowa, as clerk, and had
not seen me for two years. His regard for me was excessive.
He had been uniformly filial, and very kind to me, and
therefore when he learned that his loving mother was a
prisoner in a lunatic asylum, he felt an unconquerable desire
to see me, and judge for himself, whether I was really insane,
or whether I was the victim of his father's despotism.

His father, aware of this feeling, and fearing he might
ascertain the truth respecting me by some means, sent him a
letter, commanding him not to write to his mother now in the
asylum, and by no means visit her there, adding, if he did so,
he should disinherit him !

Theophilus was now eighteen years of age, and, as yet, had
never known what it was to disobey either his father's or moth-
er's express commands. But now his love for his mother led
him to question the justice of this seemingly arbitrary com-
mand, and he, fearful of trusting to his own judgment in this
matter, sought advice from those who had once been Mr.
Packard's church members and deacons in Mount Pleasant,
and from all he got the same opinion strongly defended, that
he had a right to disobey such a command.

He therefore ventured to visit his mother in her lonely
prison home in defiance of his father's edict.

I was called from my ward to meet my darling first-born son
in the reception-room, when I had been in my prison about
two months. After embracing and kissing me with all the
fondness of a most loving child, and while shedding our mu-
tual tears of ecstasy at being allowed to meet once more on
earth, he remarked :

" Mother, I don't know as I have done right in coming to
see you as I have, for father has forbidden my coming, and you
have always taught me never to disobey my father."

" Disobeyed your father !" said I. " Yes, I have always taught

DISAPPOINTED HOPES. 93

you it was a sin to disobey him, and I do fear you have done
wrong, if you have come to see me in defiance of your father's
command. You know we can never claim God's blessing in
doing wrong, and I fear our interview will not be a blessing
to either of us, if it has been secured at the price of disobe-
dience to your father's command."

Here his tears began to flow anew, while he exclaimed :

" I was afraid it would prove so ! I was afraid you would
not approve of my coming ! But, mother, I could not bear to
feel that you had become insane, and I could not believe it, and
would not, until I had seen you myself; and now I see it is
just as I expected, you are not insane, but are the same kind
mother as ever. But I am sorry if I have done wrong by coming. ' '

I wept — he wept — I could not bear to blame my darling boy.

"And must I ? " was the great question to be settled.

" My son, let us ask God to settle this question for us,"
and down we both kneeled by the sofa, and with my arm
around my darling boy, I asked God if I should blame him
for coming to see me in defiance of his father's order. While
asking for heavenly wisdom to guide us in the right way, the
thought came to me, " go and ask Dr. McFarland."

I accordingly went to the Doctor's parlor, where I found
him alone, reading his paper. I said to him :

" Doctor, I have a question of conscience to settle, and I
have sought your help in settling it, namely, has my son done
wrong to visit me, when his father has forbidden his coming,
and has threatened to disinherit him if he did ? He has the
letter with him showing this to be the case."

After thinking a moment, the Doctor simply replied :

" Your son has a right to visit his mother ! "

Oh, the joy I felt at this announcement ! It seemed as if a
mountain had been lifted from me, so relieved was I of my
burden. "With a light heart I sought my sobbing boy, and
encircling my arms about his neck, exclaimed :

94 MODERN PERSECUTION.

"Cheer up ! my dear child, you had a right to visit your
mother ! so says the Doctor."

Why was this struggle with our consciences ? Was it not
that we had trained them to respect paternal authority ?

At this interview, Dr. McFarland fairly promised to co-ope-
rate with my son, in doing all in his power to get me out, and
afterwards refused to do the least thing towards it, not even
to send my letters to my son, nor would he deliver his to me.
I know he received letters from him, for shortly after I saw
one on his office table from him, directed to me, and I took it
up to read it, and he took it from me, refusing to let me know
its contents.

Now I found I was destined to another disappointment, for
the Doctor had not only refused to co-operate, but was evi-
dently defeating my son's filial attempts to rescue his mother.
The agony of this disappointment was increased by the fact
that the Doctor had deceived us both, in this transaction,
therefore his word could no longer be trusted.

I was very sorry to be obliged to come to this conclusion,
for until this development I had regarded him as a man of
honor, whose word could be trusted.

Another effort my friends made was to go the Governor on
my behalf, but he replied :

" I cannot repeal laws, nor enact laws, I can only execute
laws, and if there is no law by which she can have a trial, or
be liberated, I do not know of anything that I can do for her.
It is her husband's business to take her out, and if he refuses,
there is no law to force him, so long as Dr. McFarland claims
she is insane."

After all these sore disappointments, I found that my per-
sonal liberty, and personal identity, were entirely at the mercy
of Mr. Packard and Dr. McFarland ; that no law of the Insti-
tution or of the State, recognized my identity while a married
woman ; therefore, no protection, not even the criminal's right

DISAPPOINTED HOPES. 95

of self-defence, could be extended to me ; and therefore I must
intelligently yield up all hopes of my personal liberty, so long
as Mr. Packard and Dr. McFarland lived and agreed in keep-
ing me imprisoned !

With such an institution in every State what is there now
to prevent any kind of persecution a depraved nature may in-
stigate against the innocent and unsuspecting? especially
against a married woman, who, upon the principle of common
law, has no legal protection whatever, if her husband chooses
to use the power the law gives him to prevent it !

Had I lived in the sixteenth instead of the nineteenth cen-
tury my husband would have used the laws of that day to
punish me as a heretic for this departure from the established
creed — while under the influence of the same intolerant spirit,
he now uses this autocratic institution as a means of torture
to bring about the same result — namely : a recantation of my
faith.

In other words, instead of calling me by the obsolete title
of heretic he modernizes his phrase by substituting insanity
instead of heresy as the crime for which I am now sentenced
to endless imprisonment in one of our Modern Inquisitions.

Much that is now called insanity will be looked upon by
future ages, with a feeling similar to what we feel towards
those who suffered as witches, in Salem, Massachusetts. That
persecution went so far, that the government was obliged to
make a law, that all who accused others of witchcraft, must
themselves suffer the punishment they had designed to secure
to the witch. This law and its execution put a speedy stop
to these false accusations.

Possibly, our government will be obliged to put a stop to
these false accusations of insanity, in the same manner. If
all those who falsely accused another of insanity, were com-
pelled to be treated as insane themselves, I think the number
of those brought before a jury for trial, on the charge of in-
sanity, would be greatly lessened.

CHAPTER IX.

Sunny Side of My Prison Life.

For the first four months of my prison life, Dr. McFarland
treated me himself, and caused me to be treated, with all the
respect of a hotel boarder, so far as lay in his power.

As to medical treatment, I received none at all, either from
himself, or his subordinates. And the same may be said with
equal truth, of all the inmates. This is the general rule ; those
few cases where they receive any kind of medical treatment,
are the exceptions.

A little ale occasionally, is the principal part of the medical
treatment which these patients receive, unless his medical
treatment consists in the " laying on of hands," for this treat-
ment is almost universally bestowed. But the manner in which
this was practised, varied very much in different cases.

For the first four months the Doctor "laid his hands" very
gently upon me, except that the pressure of my hand in his
was sometimes quite perceptible, and sometimes, as I thought,
longer continued than this healing process demanded !

Still, as I was then quite a novice in this mode of cure, I
might not have been a proper judge.

But after these four months he laid his hands upon me in a
different manner, and as I then thought and still do think, far
too violently. There was no mistaking the character of these
grips — no duplicity after this period, rendered this modern
mode of treatment of doubtful interpretation to me.

To Dr. McFarland's credit I must say, that if shaking
hands with his patients is his mode of medical treatment, I
must give him the credit of paying no respect of persons in
administering it. For indeed there was seldom an occupant
of the seventh ward who did not daily feel the grip of the
Superintendent's hand.

SUNNY SIDE OF MY PRISON LIFE. 97

And I have no doubt but that this mode of imparting mag-
netism was in many instances beneficial to the patient.

So far as its influence upon me was concerned, I cheerfully
admit that I considered myself benefited by it. My nervous
system had been severely taxed, my sympathies had been
stifled, and these heavy draughts on the vital forces ol my
nature had left me in a condition to be easily strengthened and
benefited by the magnetic influence of a strong and sympa-
thizing man. The affectionate pressure ol his great hand
seemed to impart a kind of vitality to my nervous system,
which did help me bear my spiritual tortures with greater for-
titude and composure. Up to this date I had reason to believe
that he did pity me, and really wished to be a true friend to
me and my interests.

Many thanks are due to Dr. McFarland for the courteous,
manly treatment I received from him during this favored
period. I did not then think, neither do I now cherish the
thought, that Dr. McFarland intended to manifest himself
towards me in any manner inconsistent with the principles of
a high-toned, manly gentleman.

Only one impulsive act of this kind did he allow himself to
commit during my entire prison life, which I think his reason
would not approve, so far as his personal treatment of me was
concerned.

One day I was entrusted with the care of some of the Seventh
ward patients, to recreate ourselves in the court-yard. Avail-
ing myself of the sources of amusement there furnished, 1
seated myself upon a swing, and also politely accepted the offer
of a gentleman, who was reclining upon the grass under the
shady tree to swing me. After allowing him to do so for a
while, I asked him to allow me to get off and let another take
my place. But instead of receiving their thanks for this offer,
Mrs. Gassaway, one of the prisoners, a wife, and mother of
several children, bestowed upon me a most severe reprimand,
5

98 MODERN PERSECUTION.

not only for swinging myselfvbut also for allowing a " male
patient," as she called my gallant, to swing me.

Instead, therefore, of accepting this offer herself, or allow-
ing any other one to accept it, she started with a quick step
towards the ward, to report my misdemeanors to Miss Eagle,
our attendant, as she threatened to do.

I, of course, followed with my paroled prisoners after her,
as I had been instructed to keep an eye upon them all ; but
instead of following them into the ward, I went alone into the
Doctor's office to report my misdemeanors at head quarters.

I found Dr. McFarland standing at his writing desk, alone
in his office. I rushed up in front of him, and in a very en-
thusiastic, amusing manner, made a frank and full confession
of what Mrs. Gassaway termed my " great improprieties ! "

With his eyes upon me, the Doctor listened with the most
profound attention to my confessions and plea for pardon, and
as I finished by inquiring :

" What shall I say to Miss Eagle in extenuation of Mrs.
Gassaway's charge against me ?

" Say nothing ; I will see that you are protected ! "

And as he made this remark, he stooped and bestowed a kiss
upon my forehead.

Although I regarded this as a mere impulsive act, dictated
by no corrupt motives, yet as I afterwards told him, I con-
sidered it an indiscreet act for a man in his position :

" For, Dr. McFarland, men do not send their wives, nor
fathers their daughters here, expecting that you will manifest
your regard for them in this manner ■, and by doing so, you
render yourself liable to just censure from the patrons of this
Institution."

The Doctor listened with silent attention to this reproof, and
only remarked :

" It was only a kiss of charity."

Here I will venture the remark, that had I been discharged

SUNNY SIDE OF MY PRISON LIFE. 99

at any time during these four months, I should doubtless
have identified myself with that class of discharged prisoners
who represent Dr. McFarland as no other than an honorable
gentleman. And I am prepared to believe there are many
whose experience would lead them to thus represent him, for,
from their standpoint, he had been only the gentlemanly
Superintendent.

The greatest fault I could see in the Doctor's conduct during
this period was, his receiving so many who were not insane, and
in retaining those who had recovered their sanity so long after
they were able to be at home. I saw several such sink back
into a state of hopeless imbecility from this cause alone. Hope
too long deferred made them so sick of life that they yielded
themselves up to desperation as a natural, inevitable result.

It was a matter of great surprise to me to find so many in
the Seventh ward, who, like myself, had never shown any in-
sanity while there, and these were almost uniformly married
women, who were put there either by strategy or by force.
None of these unfortunate sane prisoners had had any trial or
any chance for self-defence.

And I could not force myself to believe that so sensible a
man as the Doctor, could really believe they were insane,
without a shadow of evidence in their own conduct. But
sadly foolish and weak as it was, he professed to believe they
were, on simple hearsay testimony, in defiance of positive,
tangible proof to the contrary.

I once asked the Doctor iiow long he had to keep a person
imprisoned, to determine whether they were insane or not.

His reply was, " Sometimes six months, and sometimes a
year I "

Another fact I noticed, that he invariably kept these sane
wives until they begged to be sent home. This led me to sus-
pect that there was a secret understanding between the hus-
band and the Doctor ; that the subjection of the wife was the

100 MODERN PERSECUTION.

cure the husband was seeking to effect under the specious
plea of insanity ; and when they began to express a wish to
go home, the Doctor would encourage these tyrannical hus-
bands that -they were " improving."

Time after time have I seen these defenceless women sent
home only to be sent back again and again, for the sole pur-
pose of making them the unresisting willing slaves of their
cruel husbands.

I do not blame Dr. McFarland for the sins of these un-
natural husbands, but I do blame him for letting the institu-
tion be used by them as a place of punishment to married
women — as a prison, where they could appeal to none for help
or deliverance — but to themselves.

These husbands, like Mr. Packard, knew that no law could
protect the wife from their despotic power, and they knew too,
that the simple word of Dr. McFarland, that they were insane,
would legally entitle them to the use of this State's Prison as a
calaboose, where their wives could be subjected to their hus-
bands' will! I think that Dr. McFarland, even while he treated
these subjected women with decent, gentlemanly respect, was
at the same time", inflicting upon them a most cruel wrong, in
keeping them imprisoned, when he knew they were not insane.

This is the only wrong I complain of from him, during
those four months. He ought to have had the moral courage
to say to Mr. Packard :

" Your wife is not insane, and I see no reason why her per-
sonal liberty should be taken from her. Therefore, I shall
discharge her upon my own responsibility, to take care of
herself unless you choose to do so. I am sure she is capable
of assuming a self-reliant position, and therefore ought not to
be imprisoned."

But he dared not do right and justice by me, or my associates,
in this particular, but chose the cowardly course of comprom-
ising with this mean man ; and thus he trampled the highest,

SUNNY SIDE OF MY PRISON LIFE. Id

noblest instincts of his manly nature in the dust. By thus
oppressing the weak, instead of protecting them, he ruined
himself — his manliness suffered strangulation under this pro-
cess,— as the sequel will demonstrate.

But with this exception, no Superintendent could have
treated a prisoner with more consideration than he did me. I
was allowed to go into the parlor and visit with his wife or her
guests, when I pleased. I was occasionally invited to eat at
the Doctor's table. He instructed my attendants to let me go
out whenever I pleased. He allowed my room to be furnished
with the toilet comforts of any good boarding house. He
allowed me to have a trunk in my room, and all the articles
of my wardrobe that I needed.

I was allowed my gold watch and gold spectacles, my three
bladed pocket knife and scissors ; in fact, everything a hotel
boarder could desire. He furnished me books and papers to
read. I could read, knit and sew, ride or walk, when I pleased,
and to add to the feeling of trust and confidence he reposed in
me, he gave me the entire charge of a carriage load of patients,
and gave also the reins of the horse into my hands, to ride as
far as I pleased, and return when I pleased.

This he did fourteen times, with no one to care for the horse
or the patients, but myself.

He gave me money to go to the city and trade for myself,
and his wife has sent me to trade for her, and for the house.
His wife has employed me for weeks in succession, to cut and
make dresses for herself and daughters, and the matron em-
ployed me to cut and plan work for the house. I cut and made
twelve comforts for the house, and tied them myself, in my
room, made pants and vests and cut twelve dresses for the
patients.

Indeed, there was always something to do, for the comfort
of others, and my own amusement. I was allowed to visit with
most of the guests of the house.

102 MODERN PERSECUTION.

In short, but for the grated windows, and bolted doors of
prison life, I should hardly have known but I was a boarder,
whose identity and capacities were recognized, in common with
other intelligent guests.

My companions in the Seventh ward, were a very pleasant
source of social enjoyment. Among them, I found some of
the most original thinkers I ever saw ; and among this class,
some of the best teachers I had ever had.

Some of them were Spiritualists, and they taught me many
new ideas, and set me on to a new track of exploration. They
told me their visions, and trances and prophecies, many of
which have been already fulfilled, in the events of the war.

One lady had a prevision of the war, and was sent to the
Asylum because she told of it ! Another had a vision of the
same, under different imagery, and she had to lose her personal
liberty for telling of it. Both of these prophetesses, Mrs. Neff
and Mrs. Clarke, have lived to see the exact fulfillment of their
visions, and like Jeremiah, they both had to be imprisoned for
foretelling future events.

And sad as is the fact, these inspired women were compelled
even under the folds of the American flag of religious tolera-
tion, to either be false to these true inspirations, or" Hide
their light under a bushel," in order to obtain their personal
liberty. Both of them told me, they were obliged to stop
talking about it, before any one would admit they were getting
over their insanity.

But they had to endure the horrors of a Lunatic Asylum
for months, and even years, before they could be induced to
love the defence of the truth, less than their personal liberty.
But neither of these prophetesses ever did, to my knowledge,
deny the truth of these visions, nor would they own it to be
insanity. They merely yielded to be gagged, on condition
that they could be liberated by so doing.

Such manifestations as these, are what the Asylum calls

SUNNY SIDE OF MY PRISON LIFE. 103

very insane cases, so they had to be subjected to very severe
punishments, and tortures, to bring them into this condition !

They both said to me clandestinely, the night before they
left:

"My views are not changed at all, in regard to these pro-
phetic truths, yet I dare not own it aloud, lest Dr. McFarland
hear of it, and I be thereby doomed to endless torment within
these prison walls. If my attendants should know that I have
uttered these views to you, they will report me to the Doctor,
and he will order my friends to leave to-morrow without me,
as he will tell them I am not fit to go, for my insanity has re-
turned. Therefore be entreated Mrs. Packard, not to betray
me by reporting this conversation, until I am safely away from
this horrid Inquisition."

Of course I did not report them to their tormentors, but I
consider it to be my duty, to report this inquisition to the
American people, and thus appeal to their intelligence, to de-
stroy these Inquisitions, which they are now blindly sustaining,
under the popular name of charitable, humanitarian institu-
tions.

If the truth were known, I believe that much that is called
insanity at the present day, is only a higher development of
Christianity than the perverted theology of the pulpit is willing
to recognize.

CHAPTER X.

Letters to My Husband and Children.

Jacksonville, July Uth, 1860, Sabbath, P. M.

My Dear Husband and Children :

Your letter of July eleventh arrived yesterday. It was the
third I have received from home, and, indeed, is all I have re-
ceived from any source since I came to the Asylum. And the
one you received from me is all I have sent from here. I thank
you for writing so often. I shall be happy to answer all letters
from you, if you desire it, as I see you do, by your last. I like
anything to relieve the monotny of my daily routine. * * *

Dr. McFarland told me, after I had been here one week, " I
do not think you will remain but a few days longer." I suspect
he found me an unfit subject, upon a personal acquaintance.
Still, unfit as I consider myself, to be numbered amongst the
insane, I am so numbered at my husband's request. And for
his sake, I must, until my death, carry about with me, " This
thorn in the flesh — this messenger of Satan to buffet me,"
and probably, to keep me humble, and in my proper place.

God grant it may be a sanctified affliction to me ! I do try
to bear it, uncomplainingly, and submissively. But, Oh ! 'tis
hard — 'tis very hard.

May you never know what it is to be numbered with the
insane, within the walls of an asylum, not knowing your
friends will ever regard you as a fit companion or associate for
them again.

Oh ! the bitter, bitter cup, I have been called to drink, even
to its very dregs, just because I choose to obey God rather than
man ! But, as my Saviour said, " the cup which my Father
hath given me, shall I not drink it ? " Oh ! yes, for thy sake, kind

LETTERS TO MY HUSBAND AND CHILDREN. 105

Saviour, I rejoice, that I am counted worthy to suffer the loss
of all things. And thou hast made me worthy, by thine own
free and sovereign grace. Yes, dear Jesus, I am trying to
learn the lesson thou art teaching me, that " in whatsoever
state I am, therewith to be content."

Yes, content, to sit at a table with twenty-four maniacs, three
times a day, and eat my bread and meat, and drink my milk
and water, while I remember, almost each time, how many
vegetables and berries are upon my own dear table at home,
and I not allowed to taste, because my husband counts me un-
worthy, or unfit, or unsafe, to be an inmate at his fireside and
table. I eat, and retire, and pray God to keep me from com-
plaining. My fare does not agree with my health, and so I
have begged of our kind attendants, to furnish me some poor,
shriveled wheat, to eat raw, in order to promote digestion.
This morning, after asking a blessing at the table, I retired
to my own room, to eat my raw, hard wheat alone, with my
pine-apple to soften it, or rather to moisten it going down.

Yes, the berries I toiled so very hard to get for our health
and comfort, I only must be deprived of them at my husband's
appointment.

The past — Oh ! the sad past ! together with the present, and
the unknown future ! Let oblivion cover the past — let no
record of my wrongs be ever made, for posterity to see, for
your sake, my own lawful husband.

Oh ! my dear precious children ! how I pity you ! My heart
aches for you. Bnt I can do nothing for you. I am your
father's victim, and cannot escape from my prison to help you,
even you — my own flesh and blood — my heart's treasure, my
jewels, my honor and rejoicing.

For I do believe you remain true to the mother who loves
you so tenderly, that she would die to save you from the dis-
grace your father has brought upon your fair names, by being
stigmatised as the children of an insane mother, whom he
5*

106 MODERN PERSECUTION.

said he regarded as unsafe, as an inmate of your own quiet
home, and, therefore, has confined me within these awful en-
closures !

May you never know what it is to go to sleep within the
hearing of such unearthly sounds as can be heard here almost
at any hour of the night ! I can sleep in the hearing of it,
for " so he giveth his beloved sleep."

Children dear, do not be discouraged at my sad fate, for
well doing ; but be assured that, although you may suffer in
this world for it, you may be sure your reward will come in
the -next. "For, if we suffer with him, we shall also reign
with him."

Do commit your souls to him in well-doing for my sake, if
you dare not for your own sake, for I do entreat you to let me
be with you in heaven, if your father prevents it on earth.

I may not have much longer to suffer here on earth.
Several in our ward are now sick in bed, and I give them more
of my fruit than I eat myseli, hoping that, when my turn
comes to be sick, some one may thus serve me. But if not, I
can bear it, perhaps better than they can, to be without any
solace or comfort in sickness here, such as a friend needs.

Do be kind to your father, and make him as happy as possi-
ble. Yes, honor your father, if he has brought such dishonor
upon your name and reputation.

I will devote my energies to these distressed objects around
me, instead of attending to your wants, as a mother should be
allowed to do, at least, so long as she could do so, as well as I
could, and did, when I was taken from you. I know I could
not, for lack of physical strength, do as much for you as I
once could, still I was willing, and did do all I could for you.
Indeed, I find I am almost worn out by my sufferings. I am
very weak and feeble. Still I make no complaints, for I am
so much better off than many others here.

Do bring my poor lifeless body home when my spirit has

LETTERS TO MY HUSBAND AND CHILDREN. 107

fled to Jesus' arms for protection, and lay me by my asparagus
bed, so you can visit my grave and weep over my sad fate in
this world. I do not wish to be buried in Shelburne, but let
me rise where I suffered so much for Christ's sake.

Oh ! do not, do not, be weary in well-doing, for, did I not
hope to meet you in heaven, it seems as though my heart
would break !

I am useful here, I hope. Some of our patients say, it is a
paradise here now, compared with what it was before I came.
The authorities assure me, that I am doing a great work for
the institution.

When I had the prospect of returning home in a few days,
as I told you, I begged with tears not to send me, as my
husband would have the same reason for sending me back as
he had for bringing me here. For the will of God is still my
law and guide, so I cannot do wrong, and until I become
insane, I can take no other guide for my conduct. Here I
can exercise my rights of conscience, without offending any
one.

Yes, I am getting friends, from high and low, rich and poor.
I am loved and respected here by all that know me. I am
their confidant, their counsellor, their bosom friend. Oh ! how
I love this new circle of friends ! There are several patients
here who are no more insane than I am ; but are put here,
like me, to get rid of them. But here we can work for God,
and here die for him.

Love to all my children, and yourself also. I thank you for
the fruit and mirror. It came safe.- I had bought one before.

I am at rest — and my mind enjoys that peace the world can-
not give or take away. When I am gone to rest, rejoice for
me. Weep not for me, I am, and must be forever happy in
God's love.

The questions are often asked me.

" Why were you sent here ? you are not insane. Did you

108 MODERN PERSECUTION.

injure any one ? Did you give up, and neglect your duties ?
Did you tear your clothes, and destroy your things ? What
did you do that made your friends treat such a good woman
so?"

Let silence be my only reply, for your sake, my husband.

Now, my husband, do repent, and secure forgiveness from
God, and me, before it is too late. Indeed, I pity you ; my
soul weeps on your account. But God is merciful, and his
mercies are great above the heavens. Therefore, do not
despair ; by speedy repentance secure gospel peace to your
tempest-tossed soul. So prays your loving wife,

Elizabeth.

Extract from Another Letter.

My Dear Husband :

I thank you kindly for writing, and thus relieving my
burdened heart, by assuring me that my dear children are
alive and well. I have been sadly burdened at the thought of
what they are called to suffer on their mother's account.

Yes, the mother's heart has wept for them every moment ;
yet my heart has rejoiced in God my Saviour, for to suffer as
well as to do his holy. will, is my highest delight, my chief
joy.

Yes, my dear husband, I can say in all sincerity and honesty,
" The will of the Lord be done." I can still by this abundant
grace utter the true emotions of my full heart, in the words
of my favorite verse, which you all know has been my solace
in times of doubt, perplexity and trial. It is this :

" With cheerful feet thy path of duty run,
God nothing does, nor suffers to be done,
But what thou wouldst thyself, eouldst thou hut see,
Through all events of things as well as He."

r,E TTERS TO MY HUSBAND AND CHILDREN. 109

Oh ! the consolation the tempest-tossed spirit feels in the
thought that our Father is at the helm, and that no real harm
can befall us with such a pilot to direct our course.

And let me assure you all for your encouragement, that my
own experience bears honest, practical testimony that great
peace they have who make God their shield, their trust, their
refuge ; and I can even add that this insane asylum has been
to me the gate to Heaven. * * *

By Dr. McFarland's leave, I have established family wor-
ship in our hall ; and we never have less than twelve, and
sometimes eighteen or more, quite quiet and orderly, while I
read and explain a chapter — then join in singing a hymn —
then kneeling down, I offer a prayer, as long as I usually did
at our own family altar.

I also implore the blessing of God at the table at every
meal, while twenty-nine maniacs, as we are called, silently
join with me.

Our conversation, for the most part, is intelligent, and to
me most instructive. At first, quite a spirit of discord seemed
to pervade our circle. But now it is quiet and even cheerful.
I find that we as individuals hold the happiness of others to
a great degree in our own keeping, and that "A merry heart
doeth good like medicine.' ' * * *

If God so permit, I should rejoice to join the dear circle at
home, and serve them to the best of my ability. "Neverthe-
less, not as I will, but as Thou wilt." I thank you, husband,
for your kindness, both past and prospective. Do forgive me,
wherein I have ever wronged you, or needlessly injured your
feelings, and believe me your Elizabeth.

P. S. — Tell the dear children to trust God, by doing right.

CHAPTER XL

My Transition.

During the sunny days of my prison life I was allowed to
have the free and unrestricted use of my pen, with all the
paper and stationery I wished. My right to my letters, jour-
nal and private papers, was as freely acceded to me as any
other inalienable right of an American citizen. And Dr.
McFarland even respected my post-office right so much as not
to read my letters to my husband, nor do I think he read his
to me.

This, I found, was an almost unexampled practical acknowl-
edgement of this sacred right of an American citizen, while
under the locks and keys of one of its humanitarian institu-
tions.

Before I entered an insane asylum and learned its hidden
life from the standpoint of a patient, I had not supposed that
the inmates were outlaws, in the sense that the law did not
protect them in any of their inalienable rights. I had igno-
rantly supposed that their right to " life, liberty, and the pur-
suit of happiness," was recognized and respected as human
beings.

But now I have learned it is not the case ; but on the con-
trary, the law and society have so regulated this principle,
that the insane are permitted to be treated and regarded as
having no rights that any one is bound to respect — no, not
even so much as the slaves are, for they have the rights of
their master's selfish interests to shield their own rights.

But the rights of the insane are not even shielded by the
principle of selfishness. What does the keeper of this class
care for the rights of the menials beneath him ?

Nothing. His salary is secured by law, whether there be
few or many under the roof which shelters him. Unlike the

MY TRANSITION. HI

slaveholder, he can torment and abuse unto death, and his in-
terests are not impaired by this wreck of human faculties and
human life.

Indeed this wreck is oftentimes made a necessity to the Su-
perintendent, to prevent the exposure of his criminal acts.

And since there is no law to shield the insane person, he is,
by law, subject to an absolute despotism. Thus the despot is
protected in his despotism, no matter how severe and rigorous
he may become.

Now since the object of government should be to protect
the rights of its citizens, it seems to me that the insane have
rights which the government ought to respect, acknowledge,
and protect.

And one of these human rights is to write letters to whom
and when they please, as this would serve to restrain, in some
degree, the absolute despotism which rules supreme behind
the curtain.

So long as the superintendent was upright, and acted accord-
ing to his highest sense of right, he would not care what his
patients said or wrote about him. But when selfishness and
wicked policy controlled his actions, he would fear his wicked-
ness would be exposed if the patients were allowed to write
what they pleased. I think it is because the deeds of dark-
ness and cruelty are so common, instead of deeds of kindness,
forbearance and justice, that render the superintendents so
harmonious in the opinion that it is best to deprive their pa-
tients of their post-office rights, when they are deprived of
their personal liberty.

In my own experience I find this principle demonstrated, as
the sequel will show.

While I was treated with propriety, there were no strictures
put upon my correspondence ; but as soon as he began to pass
on to the plane of injustice, he became jealous at once of the
use I made ol this right.

112 MODERN PERSECUTION.

I do not think any letters I wrote during these sunny days
would have excited his jealousy if he did read them all ; but
there was one document I wrote which did arouse all the evil
influences of his nature into energetic action against me, and
this was a written reproof I gave him.

It may be a matter of surprise to my readers that I should
deem it my duty to reprove one who was acting so gentlemanly
a part towards me.

It was a surprise to myself, almost, that I should dare to
risk myself in such an encounter, knowing as I did, that all
my favors, rights and privileges, were suspended entirely upon
the will of the superintendent, and therefore, subject to his
dictation. But motives higher than those of self-interest act-
uated me, or I could not have done it. I know that I was a
rare exception in the respectful treatment he was bestowing
upon me ; no other prisoner had been so much favored before
me, if the testimony of his employees could be relied upon,
and my eligible position had become the great topic of discus-
sion among the prisoners and employees.

But by the omnipotent power of God's grace I was inspired
with moral courage sufficient to espouse the cause of the op-
pressed and the defenceless, even at the risk of becoming one
of their number by so doing.

I plainly saw and felt that on the part of their oppressors
there was power, but that they had no comforter. I felt con-
scious that I held an influence and power over Dr. McFarland,
and I deliberately determined this influence should be felt in
their behalf. And, like Queen Esther, I felt willing to cast
in my lot with these despised captives, if necessary, to be their
deliverer.

I therefore depicted their wrongs, oppression and received
cruelties, in the most expressive terms I could command, and
on this statement of awful facts I based an appeal to his intel-
ligence, his humanity, and his conscience, to become their
protector and deliverer.

MY TRANSITION . 113

I furthermore added, that unless he did treat them with
more justice, I should expose his criminal conduct publicly,
when I got out ; but if he would repent of these sins against
humanity, he would have nothing to fear, for we would all
forgive the past if he would repent now, and do us justice in
the future.

This document cast the die for my future destiny.

The transition time had fully come, when comfort, attention,
respect, privilege, all, all, were in the dead past, and discom-
fort, inattention, disrespect, contempt, wrong and deprivation
are to mark the future of my prison life.

It was for others' interests I plead — it was of others' wrongs
and woes I complained. It was for them and their sakes I
deliberately laid down my position as the asylum favorite, and
became henceforth the asylum prisoner.

From this time, for two years and eight months, was I made
a close prisoner, and never after, with but one exception,
allowed to step my foot outside the asylum walls, and I fully
believe it was the Doctor's purpose to make a maniac of me,
by the skillful use of the asylum tortures.

But, thank God ! the mouths of the Asylum Lions were
kept shut, so that they could not hurt me, and like Shadrach,
Meshach and Abednego, the Lord brought me out of this fiery
furnace without the taint of insanity upon me. I did not fear
to trust the Lord in the line of my duty — he did not forsake
me in my captivity.

Although henceforth I became one with my fellow captives
in suffering, yet never for one moment have I regretted the
step I then took in their defence, nor the transition it assigned
me.

CHAPTER XII.

My Removal from the Best "Ward
to the Worst.

One Saturday evening, after chapel prayers, Dr. McFarland
took me by the arm and led me from the chapel into the eighth
ward, and as he left me "behind the dead lock, said :

" You may occupy this ward, Mrs. Packard."

This was the first manifestation ol the change in the Doctor's
feelings towards me. As he left, I said to my attendant :

" Miss Tenny, what does this mean ? "

" I don't know ; all he said to me was, ' I wish you not to
allow Mrs. Packard to leave the ward, and give her a dor-
mitory bed, and treat her as you do the maniacs.' "

" I don't know what it means either, he has never
reproved me for anything, neither have I broken any rules
that I know of. I wonder if ' my reproof has not offended
him?"

" I presume it has ; I have heard there was quite a stir
about it."

I found it was generally known that I was preparing a
document in defence of the prisoners' rights, and several had
heard me read it ; and although they insisted upon its truth
in every particular, yet they all seemed to think I had no
idea of the Doctor's power over us, or I should not dare to
utter the truth so plainly to him.

Some said, " We have often told him the same thing, but he
takes no notice of it whatever, unless he gets mad about it,
then he will send us to some bad ward to be punished for it."
Others would say, " Mrs. Packard, you had better not give
the Doctor that document, unless you wish to be sent to a
dungeon, where you could never see daylight again 1"

MY REMOVAL TO THE WORST WARD. H5

Another would say, " I will stand by you, Mrs. Packard,
if you will give him that document, if he kills me for doing
so ! for it is the truth."

Fearing some of these predictions might prove true, I took
the precaution to take an exact copy of the document, and
sewed it up in a cloth, and hid it between the glass and the
board back of my mirror, where it remained, undisturbed and
unknown, to any one except myself, until I took it out after I
was liberated. I did this, thinking that if I should be killed
there, it might some time be found, and tell the cause of my
sudden or mysterious death ; or if ever I should be liberated,
it might be a vindication of my sanity, and explain the reason
for my being retained so long. Since my liberation I have
printed and sold several thousand copies of this reproof.

I also put every article of my wardrobe in perfect order,
before going to chapel prayers that night, feeling a kind of
presentiment of coming evil. I also told my friends in this
seventh ward, that I hoped they would save my things from
destruction, if they could not help me, in case of an encounter
with the Doctor. •

As it proved, I went to the chapel as well prepared, for the
event as I could have been, had I known what was to happen.
My attendant, Miss Eagle, of the seventh ward, told me that
the Doctor came directly to my room after he had disposed of
me, and shut himself in there alone, a long time, while he
searched my things all over to find every manuscript I had in
my possession, which he took from me. Knowing that I
had a duplicate of my reproof, he determined to find and
destroy it. But in this attempted robbery he failed.

He then ordered Miss Eagle to send all my things to the
trunk room, and not allow me to take my bowl and pitcher
and mirror, although they were my own.

He ordered my new attendant, Miss Tenny, to treat me just
as she did the maniacs, who were now my sole companions — to

116 MODERN PERSECUTION.

let me have nothing to amuse myself with, by way of sewing,
reading, or writing.

My associates in this ward occupied themselves in screaming,
fighting, running, hallooing, sitting on the floor when they sat
at all in their own rooms, as chairs were not allowed in this
ward. There was scarcely a patient in the whole ward who
could ask or answer a question in a rational manner.

This ward was then considered the worst in the house,
inasmuch as it then contained some of the most dangerous
class of patients, even worse than the fifth in this respect, and
in respect to filth and pollution it surpassed the fifth at that
time. It is not possible for me to conceive of a more fetid
smell, than the atmosphere of this hall exhaled. An occupant
of this hall, would inevitably become so completely saturated
with this most offensive effluvia, that the odor of the eighth
ward patients could be distinctly recognised at a great dis-
tance, even in the open air.

I could, in a few moments after the Doctor put me in among
them, even taste this most fetid scent at the pit of my stomach.
Even our food and drink were so contaminated with it, we
could taste nothing else, sometimes. It at first seemed to
me, I must soon become nothing less than a heap of putre-
faction. But I have found out that I can live, move, breathe,
and have a being, where I once thought I could not !

This awful scent was owing to neglect in the management
of the Institution. This was not the visitor's ward. Seldom
any, but the asylum occupants, found their entrance into this
sink of human pollution.

The patients were never washed all over, although they were
the lowest, filthiest class of prisoners. They could not wait
upon themselves any more than an infant, in many instances,
and none took the trouble to wait upon them. The accumula-
tion of this defilement about their persons, their beds, their
rooms, and the unfragrant puddles of water through which

MY REMOVAL TO THE WORST WARD. H7

they would delight to wade and wallow, rendered the exhala-
tions in every part of the hall almost intolerable.

To endure this contamination, I felt certain my daily cold
water bath must be continued ; but how could it be done, with
only one tin wash basin for eighteen persons ? I found that
we all could hardly find time to wash even our hands and face,
before breakfast, in this single dish, much less could it be
spared long enough for one to take a full bath.

My attendant tried to get my bowl and pitcher from the
Seventh ward, to accommodate me, but the Doctor forbid it.

I asked him for it. He refused me.

I then claimed the right to take a new chamber vessel, that
was brought into the ward for another purpose, and tied a
scarlet string around the handle to distinguish it, and kept it
under my bed for my washbowl. By this means I was able to
continue my daily bath, although I found my feelings of deli-
cacy revolted from the gaze of from four to six room-mates,
who occupied the same dormitory with myself.

The Doctor expressly forbid my having a room by myself,
but compelled me to sleep in this dormitory for one year,
where, each night, my life was exposed, by the violent hands
of these maniacs. I have been obliged to call up my attend-
ant, some nights, to save being killed by them. Still the
Doctor would not let her give me a room by myself.

I have sometimes thought the Doctor put me there for the
very purpose of getting me killed by these maniacs.

I have been nearly killed several times, and I have appealed
most earnestly to Dr. McFarland to save my life, but he would
simply turn speechless away from me ! I have also asked him
to remove some of the most dangerous ones for my safety, and
the only response would be, to bring in a more dangerous one !

I made no complaints, never expostulated with him, nor
spoke a disrespectful or reproachful word to him, in vindica-
tion of my own rights. I never made any confession to him

118 MODERN PERSECUTION:

of wrong doing on my part, nor presented any plea'for pardon
or forgiveness.

Neither did he ever ntter one word of explanation to me,
why he was pursuing this course of treatment towards me.
Neither could any one about the building ever get him to give
them any reason for this change towards me, except :

" It is all for her good."

But to the credit of my attendants, the two sisters, Misses
Tenny, and Mrs. Waldo, the matron, I am happy to add, they
did not feel bound to co-operate in all the Doctor's plans to
abuse and torment me. Indeed, the oldest Miss Tenny, openly
and boldly refused to treat me as she did the maniacs. In her
own language I can vindicate her, for her conduct correspond-
ed with her words.

One day, after sympathizing with me in my privations, she
said:

"Mrs. Packard, I shall not treat you as I do the other
patients, notwithstanding the Doctor has ordered me to. I
shall use my own judgment, and treat you as I think you de-
serve to be treated."

And indeed, she did treat me like a sister. I do not now
see how she could have done better by me than she did ; and
to her kindness, and tender sympathy, do I owe much under
God, for being able to escape the many dangers and trials
which enveloped me, and come out from among them un-
harmed.

The two Misses Tenny deserve much credit also, for the
reasonable and judicious treatment they bestowed upon the
other patients in this ward. In fact, they were the first truly
kind attendants I had then seen in the Asylum. They were
the first I had found, who seemed to fear God more than they
did Dr. McFarland.

Even the day following the Doctor's order to not let me leave
the ward on any account, she took me to the trunk room

MY REMOVAL TO THE WORST WARD. H9

herself, and asked me to select any articles from my wardrobe I
wished, and let me take my sewing box, containing my knife,
scissors, and spectacles, etc., and gave me a drawer in the dor-
mitory table to keep them in, and put the key of it into my
own pocket. This was a marked act of confidence on her part,
for there were strict rules in this ward, that no knife or scissors
be allowed in the ward, even in the hands of the attendants.

Mrs. "\Yaldo, our matron, extended to me her practical sym-
pathy, by doing many things for my comfort, which the Doctor
forbid. She allowed me to use a covered box with a cushioned
seat upon it, as a substitute for my trunk, and she bought me
a metallic wash bowl after a while, which I used for nearly two
years, for myself alone, and by a little strategy, she and Miss
Tenny secured my mirror for our dormitory, as there was no
mirror of any kind in the ward.

But this dauntless act well nigh cost me my document, for
we had hardly got it hung on to its nail, when one of the wild
patients seemed to be seized with a furious spite against it, and
rushing up to the table beneath it, took article after article
upon the table, and threw against it with almost incredible
rapidity; but just before she had time to hurl the tumbler and
pitcher against it, one of my room-mates seized the mirror
from the nail, and rushed with it into another room, while
the fragments of the tumbler and pitcher were flying in all
directions, and the table upset with terrible violence.

After this, I kept my mirror hid between my beds, except
when I wished to use it, or let others use it. But I occasion-
ally found some of the maniacs had taken it from its hiding
place, and were using it as they pleased ; but by the most
gentle and adroit coaxing, I got it back again, safely. I once
recollect of getting one to give it to me in exchange for an apple.

But this mirror, like myself, seemed destined to elude all
attacks upon its destruction. The document within it, and
the spirit^within me, seemed alike invulnerable '

CHAPTER Xni.

My Reproof to Dr. MeFarland for his
Abuse of his Patients.

Dr. McFarland : From the effect of my former document
(my defence*), I plainly see that my work here is not yet done.
The office of a Reprover is put upon me ; and this to me, the
hardest of all crosses, I bear for Christ's sake.

Christ is now my only Master, and his will, not my own, is
now my only choice. Oh ! my Master, help me to do this
duty under thy special guidance and dictation.

In Christ's own expressive language, I say, " Come let us
reason together."

I do not approve of publishing your faults to the world until
you have had an opportunity first, to amend your ways and
your doings, by being faithfully, candidly and honestly in-
formed of the true position in which you stand as Superin-
tendent of this institution.

Dr. McFarland, it is my honest opinion that the principles
upon which you treat the inmates of this institution, are con-
trary to reason, to justice, to humanity. They are treated in
a very insane manner — in a manner the best calculated to
make maniacs that human ingenuity could devise. No human
being can be subjected to the process to which you subject
them here, without being in great danger of becoming insane ;
especially, if their physical or mental constitution is in the
least degree impaired.

Your discipline is invariably calculated to increase their dif-
ficulties, and make them worse rather than better. And even a

* A document I had previously given him in defence of my sanity, with the
request that I be discharged as a sane person.

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND. 121

person with a sound mind, and a sound body, could hardly
pass through a course here and come out unharmed, without
faith, and such faith as is needed to sustain the soul in
passing through its deepest earthly trials.

Indeed put your wives or your daughters through such a
discipline as you put others' wives and daughters through
here, and I believe they could not come out unharmed.

Again, you are constantly breaking the insane laws of the
State, by the course you are pursuing ; and it would not re-
quire a person of more than a common share of intelligence
to make this apparent to the Legislature. It is even a s,elf-
evident proposition.

Again, a person is very apt to become what they are taken
to be. You may take the sanest person in the world, and tell
him he is insane and treat him as you do here, it is the most
trying ordeal a person can pass through, and not really become
insane.

You seem to regard insanity as a crime ! — a capital crime !
— to be punished with death, by slow torture.

And I really think the world ought to know of the fact by
a public notice that :

" Those guilty of the crime ot insanity should be sent to
Jocksonville, Asylum, under the care of Dr. McFarland, and
his ally Dr. Tenny. Here it will be sure to receive its con-
dign punishment."

The only way a person can secure, or have the least reason
to expect decent treatment here, is one who has been educated
to observe with the utmost strictness, all the proprieties of
conduct expected from the most genteel society — and be such
a Christian, as can bear abuse silently and meekly — must be
entirely non-resistant.

In short must have a perfect symmetry of development in
the manifestation of his organization, however unfortunately
unbalanced by nature ; and they must say they are insane when
6

122 MODERN PERSECUTION.

they know they are not ; and they must believe that others are
better judges of their motives and intentions than themselves.
In short, they must give up their identity to the Superinten-
dent, for him to judge whether they are fit to live free to serve
God according to the dictates of their own conscience, or not.

With each and even all these qualifications, he must expect
that the exhibition of practical godliness, in the form of com-
passion for the suffering, or pity for the sick or unfortunate,
is to be regarded as insanity, and attributed to a religious
monomania.

Indeed it seems to me that the age has become degenerate
to that degree, that a person cannot live a true natural life
without being regarded as insane . And I do believe that much
of what is called insanity at the present age, is only a speci-
men of true, pure, simple Christianity, such as the present cor-
rupt age fails to recognize — so different is it from the educated
Christianity of creeds, sects, and denominational religion.

I believe that many in this asylum are such specimens of
martyrdom for Christ and principle as the age produces, and
that they are yet to be some of the brightest purest, noblest
saints and angels around God's throne in heaven.

I fully believe that some of those whom you have placed on
the lowest plane in this asylum, God will exalt to the highest
among His sons and daughters in His Kingdom. Yes, there
is strong reason to believe that the first in this institution
<< shall be last and the last first."

Yea, in our insane asylums may be fomid the only real sane
beings in the world, who, like the righteous of Sodom, are to
become the world's saviours.

Dr. McFarland, compassion and its natural manifestation,
is not insanity — it is Christianity. Sympathy is not insanity
— it is Christianity. Humanity is not insanity — it is Chris-
tianity. Rational, reasonable conduct is not insanity — it is
Christianity. The true instincts of human nature, in man or

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND. 123

woman are not insanity — they are Christian developments.
Neither is an unbalanced organization insanity. Physical
agony and its natural expression, are not insanity.

But, sir, each and all these, you treat as insanity, and you
also treat them as a crime, deserving death, if you cannot
subdue the patient without or short of death !

I fully believe there are martyrs, whom you have murdered
here, whose souls from under God's altar are now crying to
God to avenge on you their wrongs. I have heard one of
your favorite attendants say to, and of, a patient :

"You deserve to die if you wont stop crying!" and, "it
would have been only good enough for her if I had killed
her!!"

I have proof from a personal observation of your own actions,
and I am not afraid to meet the charge before any jury in the
world, in 1860, that you, sir, have exhibited more evidence of
insanity on your part, than I have seen on any person since I
entered this institution ! and I think your insanity deserves,
and merits, imprisonment for life, in a state of extreme torture ;
and unless you do speedily repent, I believe that you like
Nebuchadnezzar will really become insane — that is, devoid of
reason like the beasts, and you will receive the same punish-
ment for it that you have inflicted upon your helpless victims.

You have merited the reputation of a Nero, and that repu-
tation you will yet have, unless you repent.

You must receive according to our deeds, like all God's
other accountable agents.

I feel called of God, and I shall obey this call, to expose your
character by exposing your actions, to the light of 1861, unless
you repent. I have ability — I have influence — I have friends —
I have money — I have God's promised aid, on which I rely
more confidently than on each and all other instrumentalities
combined to aid me in doing this. I have powerful friends of
freedom who will help me to break the chains, with which you

124 MODERN PERSECUTION.

bind your slaves here in a slavery, worse than Southern slavery.

I cannot believe that there is any class of convicts or crimi-
nals in our land, who are not treated with more humanity —
with more decency — with less of utter contempt and abuse,
than you treat your insane patients here. Most criminals
have some sort of a trial before they are punished ; but here,
all that is required, is the misrepresentation of an angry at-
tendant, who thus secures to her helpless victim the punish-
ment, which her own conduct justly merits upon herself.

And besides, if one of their number — the criminals — has
the moral courage to carry out the humane instincts of her
God -given nature, by espousing the cause of the innocent
victim of their cruelties, she must expect to do so at the ex-
pense oi receiving the like punishment inflicted upon herself,
for this desperate act of insanity on her part !

Horrible! But true — true as facts — numberless facts —
can make it.

And what is worse for you, sir, is the fact that this is known
— and known by those who are determined, by God's help, to
have your character exposed and your insanity punished, as it
should be, and will be unless you repent, and that speedily —
for, " The end is near and hasteth greatly."

The sword ol God Almighty is already unsheathed. The
work of destruction has commenced and " a quick work will
the Lord make on the earth." Justice, humanity, and truth,
will reign on the earth, henceforth ; and whoever and what-
ever opposes these principles will be overthrown and destroy-
ed ; or they will repent by doing right, by acting as well as
speaking honestly, truthfully ; or, in other words, by doing unto
others as they would wish to be done by.

You seem determined not to do so. If you carry out this
determination, you will meet as you deserve to receive, Pha-
raoh's destruction.

You can, like him, try to ease your troubled conscience by

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND 125

the sophism- — these are only the ravings of insanity. But, sir,
they are not. They are the words of " truth and soberness,"
such as you will have to meet at God's bar ; and I shall there
witness against you, that I did faithfully warn you of your
coming certain doom.

If I felt there was any hope, by appealing to your humanity,
I might plead that, if you could be so reckless to your own
interests, as to disregard this appeal, could you not, out of pity
to your humane wife, and your innocent children, spare them
the disgrace of your own iniquities being visited upon them.

Repentance — dealing justly — returning to their friends, the
many, many individuals here, whom you unjustly, illegally re-
tain, years and years, when you have no right to them a sin-
gle day, is your only refuge.

Oh ! the agonies of bereavement, hopeless — which you are
alone responsible for in God's sight, and will soon be found to
be in man's sight also !

Your prison-bound captives, now objects of your contempt
and utter criminal indifference, you are destined to see rising
and applauded as the world's reformers — while you are des-
tined to sink into oblivion, and your name to rot, unless you
repent.

The little stone of truth, cut out of the mountain without
hands, and wielded by one, whom you may try to stigmatize
as insane, will cause your overthrow, unless you repent.

I defy all your attempts to make me out an insane person.
You cannot do it. My life is hid with Christ in God, where
neither you nor devils can harm it. It is absolutely beyond
your power to harm me. And all your attempts to do so, will
be only working out your more speedy destruction.

Dr. Samington, the Methodist minister, in Manteno, is not
the only person who will decide upon your qualifications for
your position, by your decision respecting me. As he inti-
mated, the man who would call me an insane person was not

126 MODERN PERSECUTION.

fit for his place. Perhaps it was for this very thing I was sent
here, to let the State see that Dr. McFarland has yet to learn
the very alphabet of his profession. To let the fact appear,
that you are so insane yourself, that you cannot tell a sane
from an insane person !

Now just test your transcendental machinery and power to
make out a case of insanity, of so occult a nature, that no
being in the universe has ever had any evidence of its exist-
ence on any plane whatever, either physical, mental, moral or
spiritual.

I make my boast of a sound mind, in as nearly as sound a
physical organization, as the civilized world can produce. I
am a monument for the age, that a healthy organization can
be maintained, by a strict conformity to the laws of nature.

I am also a monument for the age — a standing miracle,
almost — of the power of faith to shield one from insanity, by
having come out unharmed, through a series of trials, such as
would crush into a level with the beasts, I may say, any one,
who did not freely use this antidote.

Besides, Dr. McFarland, there are others in this institution,
that have now become alike invulnerable. They are protected
by a spiritual power that is invincible, and all your skillfully
worked machinery for making maniacs, cannot make maniacs
of them. As your friend, I advise you to beware ! There be
more for us, than there are against us.

You are the weak party. You had better make us your
friends, by deserving our friendship. There is an influence
indicated by the " wrath of the Lamb," which is dreadful to
cope with. Let pure spiritual woman become exasperated
beyond her powers of endurance, yea, until forbearance ceases
to be a virtue, and I pity her adversary then.

We are merciful and forgiving in our natures ; but, Dr.
McFarland, there is a point beyond which our forgiveness is
impossible. Then is the time for you to fear her artillery. Let
the prayer of the righteous be offered, that God will verify

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND 127

his promise contained in these words, " Yengeance is mine, I
will repay," and woe then to that power, which has Omnipo-
tence for its adversary !

Dr. McFarland, you may think I am severe. But they are
only the " wounds of a friend." I do want to respect and
love you. But I cannot, unless you will exhibit some human-
ity. I cannot love an mhuman man. I do not think you are,
now, altogether inhuman. But I do think you are fast becom-
ing so, by restraining all manifestations of sympathy and
humanity towards your patients-.

You not only seem to feel that it is wrong to treat us with
the least degree of humanity, but even unreasonable, irra-
tional, unnatural, and even the most uncivil conduct seems to
you, as the most likely course to awaken the opposite virtue,
in us. It appears to us, that the more unnatural, the more
perverted, the more insane treatment you can secure to us,
the more reason we have to expect to become sane and rea
sonable ourselves.

The principle has just flashed upon my mind by which you
expect to cure insanity, and this principle is faithfully applied
to your patients, viz. :

" Evil of the like kind must be used to correct an evil," that
is, you act as though the more insane the treatment bestowed,
the more likely to effect a cure of insanity ! You seem entirely
averse to even meeting us on the plane of rationality.

I cannot hold converse with any one who will not manifest
more rationality and common sense than you do in these
wards.

For example, last Saturday night, I could not talk with you
in response to those " beats of your hand! " I do not know
how to meet you on so low a plane of rationality or intellect
as you come about us with, and seem to expect our response
as insane as your introduction ; and there is not one in our
hall (if I except Mrs. Fisher, and even she expresses more

128 MODERN PERSECUTION.

when she does speak) but shows more intelligence in their in-
tercourse with me, than you do, in our wards.

Even when I, in as lady-like a manner as I possibly could
do it, went to your parlor, Sabbath afternoon, and asked you
if you did not pity us, ior our disappointment in not having
chapel service ; your only response was :

"Oh ! you must read to them."

But, at the same time, must have nothing to read !

Indeed, this is a more insane act than I know how to per-
form for your patients.

But, by pressing my suit, I did get some old papers to read,
plainly saying :

"Good enough for insane beings."

And, if I attempt to manifest even intelligence enough to
express a preference for the news as found in the late papers,
I must only expect some renewed expression of insult and
indignity, derision and scorn.

Again, when I told you, in as lady-like manner as I could,
that my room was so cold that a cloth would freeze in it, and
I was obliged to go to bed to keep sufficiently warm, not to
expose my health ; you simply turned speechless away, as
much as to say :

" Insane people don't know whether they are cold ror hot,
neither do I care ! "

No wonder, Dr. McFarland, that I do not seek you as a
comforter, a friend, a brother. I do avoid you, out of respect
to my feelings as a human being .

Oh ! Dr. McFarland, it is hard for me, with my intellect and
my Christianity, to put up with such treatment, from a human
being, who has a form like God. I can't understand you, I
can't see what you can mean to treat me so.

I used, at first, when I heard complaints of wrongs, to tell
the patients ■

"Go with them to Dr. McFarland, he is our friend, we can
confide in him."

"George, we have no Mother 1" See page 61.

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND. 129

But they would reply, " it is of no use, he will turn from
us in disdain, speechless!"

And now I know, from both sad experience and observation,
that it is too true, you are not our friend. You are our tor-
mentor, and we avoid you to save our feelings.

What is it that causes such a wail of horror to pervade this
house, at the intelligence of a new arrival ?

And what causes the thrill of joy at the discharge of a
patient, when they leave exclaiming :

" I am thankful to get away from this place with my life ? "

What means the oft repeated expression on the part of both
the patients and the employees :

" If there is any hell in the universe, I believe it is here ? "

" It is almost impossible to do right here — no encouragement
whatever."

" If it is possible to do right in hell, we can do right here,"
&c, &c.

Oh ! Dr. McFarland, can you cause such a state of things
and not be an insane man ?

I really fear that Nebuchadnezzar's punishment has already
so far been felt, by you, that you are past the power of reason
to move you. I have even now tried this, my last appeal upon
you, in defiance of the oft repeated instruction :

" It is of no use — you cannot affect the doctor — he is ada-
mant itself."

Yes, your own wife has told me : " Writing will be of no use,
whatever."

" But it will be of use — it will clear my skirts of the guilt
of your own lost soul — lost, in spite of warning and rebuke.
And I shall receive from my Saviour the plaudit, " she hath
done what she could" for suffering humanity under Dr. Mc-
Farland's charge.

And, although I speak no more to you upon the subject, I
shall not relinquish my purpose, until both the Trustees and
6*

130 MODERN PERSECUTION.

the Legislature are importuned, by facts, to trust no more
human beings under your care, until you have been disciplined
in an insane asylum, yourself, until you can claim to give
evidence of being a sane man, by your own actions.

You need not sneer at this. I have hundreds on my side,
already ; such men as the one who told me himself, that he
believed this Asylum was conducted more like a penitentiary
than an insane asylum. He has had a wife here for years, and
made no better by your punishments.

Many men have had wives and daughters here, whose testi-
mony is credited in spite of your calling it "their insanity."

The world are no longer to give more credit to testimony
than to their own observation. Those that you call insane,
others do not. You have stood upon your position, now you
must stand upon your own acts.

And of one thing you may rest assured, the time for down-
trodden and oppressed women to have their rights, has come.
Her voice and her pen are going to move the world ; and if you
wish to be popular, despise her not !

Listen to your wife's instinctive teachings of humanity and
kindness. Her character is being appreciated here, because her
actions show, she pities us, and seems to think, how would I
like to have my Hatty treated as other Hatties are ?

You cannot stop her. She has begun the Christ-like work of
ameliorating the condition of your patients, and God is with
her, and her work will prosper. If you oppose it, all the worse
for you : for it is of God, and you cannot overthrow it. She
is destined to rule this Hospital, and to rule it with kindness
and sympathy. Her well begun work will end gloriously.

I say again, gain woman's friendship if you want to be popu-
lar now. But if you will not, God will dispose of you. We will
leave you, for some more hopeful field on which to bestow our
labors of kindness and love. We have nothing to do to our
enemies but to do them good, and God does our avenging/or us.

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND. 131

This message is a kind act from a kind friend and sister.
She longs to have the act appreciated ; for your manly nature
cannot understand the effort it has cost my feelings, to write
this message to you. For I know it must cost you mental
agony, if you are not past hope. And Oh ! it is hard for woman
to see or know that another heart suffers. Her nature is sensi-
tive to the highest degree to suffering, especially in others. I
really believe some women had rather suffer themselves, than
see others suffer.

But I am forgetting my office — the office of a Reprover —
my nature tempts me astray.

Oh! Dr. McFarland, you are really losing the manifestation
of your reason, if you are not losing it entirely. And, as for
your humanity, I have no hope, since you propose sending me
back to my tyrannical, brutal husband.

Indeed, I tell my fellow captives, I will stay with them, and
cast in my lot with them, and I will spare no pains, until I
work their deliverance out of your hands. For you are inca-
pacitated for your office, and I shall so make it appear to the
world, unless I see some reason for changing my purpose.

I will not suffer humanity to be so abused, as you do here,
without lifting my voice against it — and it will be heard !
There are men of influence in the world who believe me to be
a true woman, as well as a Christian, and all the transcendental
powers you may choose to employ to make me out insane, will
not be believed, in face of myself — my own words and acts.

And you are not always to be allowed to hold me as your
prisoner. My cla}rs are numbered nere, and you cannot add
one to that number. I shall soon be free — free to serve God
according to the dictates of my own conscience, with none to
make me afraid any more. The lions about me are all chained ;
they cannot go beyond their chains. The highway upon
which I tread is beyond their reach longer to worry or deter
me from duty.

132 MODERN PERSECUTION.

I came here a sane person — I shall leave a sane person — I
shall make a sane report of my sane observations here, since it
now seems my duty, from appearances, to present.

Remember, Dr. McFarland, " The earth helped the woman."

I shall be protected in exposing your character to the world,
by publishing the volume of facts I have already collected
from competent legal testimony.

You just imprison me another three months, and I engage
to transfer the records of the adamantine pen, with the steel
pen, for the iron pen of the press of 1861.

It shall be a volume prefaced by both this and my former
document, and it shall contain a record of truths, such as I am
willing to meet at the bar of final judgment, and such as will
place you, where you deserve to be placed, on a level with the
beasts.

I express no opinions, especially on paper, but what I can
support by sound argument. The opinions herein expressed,
I stand ready to prove, if proof is called for, from facts — stub-
born facts.

Dr. McFarland, you have employees here, in this building,
who have given such testimony as the following. It is ready
for use, viz : —

" Dr. McFarland keeps persons here, that are not insane to
my certain knowledge."

" He keeps them after they are able to go home, for months
and years, and in some cases, insanity is caused, by hope too
long deferred for nature to endure."

" I never was in a place so inhuman in all my life."

" A person might work here until they drop down dead, and
no one cares."

" Dr. McFarland seems to require more of insane persons
than he would expect from sane ones."

" The patients are so badly treated here, that I could never
think of having a friend of mine ever come here for treatment."

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND. 133

" I have seen patients choked nearly to death, so that their
faces were black and their tongues hung out of their mouths."

"If it were not for losing my place here, I would expose
Dr. McFarland to the world, for the cruelty he practices upon
his patients.

This is but a specimen of the kind of testimony I have on
hand, in sad abundance, and which, with my own eye and ear,
witness testimony would make a ponderous volume.

How would you like to see such facts as these in print ?

A lady of refinement — of pure and virtuous character — of
kind and nobly generous sympathies and of a nature remark-
ably true to the instincts of a true woman, before being here
thirty-six hours, was stripped of all her clothing, except a torn
chemise, and laid upon her back on the floor, while Dr. Tenny
sat astride her naked body to hold her down, while four attend-
ants could strap their sister, under these circumstances, as if
she were a tiger ! !

Must not a person possess an uncommon elasticity of tem-
perament, ever to rise above the degrading influence of such
an outrage upon her womanly nature I

From whom is repentance and forgiveness demanded — from
you, her tormentor — or from her, your innocent victim ?

Again, would you like to have it known, that this same lady
was subjected to the torture of the straps one whole night,
for simply insisting that the request of a dying woman should
be granted, viz., that a cat should not be locked up in her
room all night with her alone, lest she would gnaw her ema-
ciated limbs before life was extinct ?

Because she saved the disgrace of having such a stigma
brought upon the State, of a patient being eaten alive by a
cat, she must be strapped as her punishment ! !

Another aggravation of your guilt is this — that you put
upon our merciful sex the credit of the inhumanity of your
acts, and claim for yourself the humanity, by compelling them

134 MODERN PERSECUTION.

to do, what you, in your boasted humanity, in words, claim the
privilege of undoing. They must be called to hear the dis-
grace of locking the straps, while you claim the credit of un-
locking them, to show your humanity to your patients ! !

Dr. McFarland, your patients are too sane for you to shield
your true character from them by such subterfuges. And, how
can you expect, that a heart-searching God will not see
through this covert of lies, and not bring you to justice ?

He does ! — He will ! —

Dr. McFarland, Bell Norton is no more insane than Peter
was, when he cursed and swore and denied his Master. Satan
entered into him, tempted by the barbarity of the soldier's
treatment of his loving Master.

Satan enters Bell Norton, tempted by your barbarous
treatment of her and her kindred associates.

Did Christ, your pattern, torture Peter with straps to punish
him, because he, true to the noble impulses of his generous,
self-sacrificing impulsive nature, threatened and even tried to
kill in sell-defence of his own and others' rights ?

No. He " looked upon him," a look of compassion — of pity.

It subdued him. Straps never would have done it. Straps
and torture ol the most savage kind can never subdue Bell
Norton.

But sympathy will, and that alone.

Yes, Bell has, through this influence alone, like Peter,
wept bitterly, and she has with Peter, an equal claim to the
Lord's forgiveness ; for she has like him, manifested her
repentance in the same manner which Peter did ; and it is
not for me to judge whether her repentance is not equal to
Peter's in sincerity.

How can you be so insane as to act as though you expected
to make a new organization of Bell by torture ?

You may and have already done enough of this kind of busi-
ness to kill or make insane for life, any ordinary individual.

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND. 135

But she, I am satisfied, is proof against your demoniacal
powers. God, himself, has fitted her to cope with this devil in
human form, and she has, through his power alone, come oft"
conqueror. Yes, the victor's crown awaits her, for she has won
it. She has maintained her right to her own instinctive nature,
inviolate, in spite of your vain attempts to wrest them from her.

Yes, Bell is the same " woman of nature " which God made
her to be, as a model for the age. You may yet vainly regret
what you have made Bell suffer on your account, by seeing
your lovely Hattie subjected to a similar process to make her
organization like Bell Norton's.

But Hattie' s tormentors will find, like Bell's tormentors,
that Hattie can only be the being God has made her, as Bell
can be only Bell.

But these, their tormentors, will find to their sorrow, that
an indignant God is their adversary, for their trying to mar
his image by striving to undo his own well done works.

Why are you not willing that Bell should be just the true
woman of nature which God has, for his own benevolent pur-
pose sent to our world, at a time when a true woman is such
an anomaly, that she is hardly recognized or owned as a sane
person, so insane and perverted has the character of woman
become ?

Dr. McFarland, if you see many more years on this earth,
I fully believe that you would be proud to see your Hattie
just such a simple, natural, true woman as Bell is.

Dr. McFarland, my work for you is nearly done. I there-
fore, here present you my bill of five dollars, for services
performed for your family, viz. : for twelve days' work of
cutting, fitting and making dresses for your wife and daughters,
at forty- two cents a day, I charge you five dollars as a just
debt. I claim it as a debt of honor. If you do not choose to
meet the claim on this ground, you may expect to see it
presented as a legal claim — such as will collect it.

136 MODERN PERSECUTION.

And let me assure you, this is not the only claim on your
purse, which your patients are yet to demand, in behalf of the
State, for retaining us illegally here, when we ought to be
supporting ourselves. And, I assure you, this draft upon
your finances will not be a light one. You will need your
eight dollars a day to meet all our claims, and your family
may suffer for want of the eight dollar a day stream with
which your garden is now watered.

This eight dollar stream is to be dried up, and your garden
to wither in consequence.

And so is your great oak of popularity to become leafless
without affording you a protection. Your high-sounding
words of honor are mere empty bubbles without the acts of
honor.

Honorable acts, not honorable words merely, is all than can
now save you.

Your faithful Eva's unrequited services are not your only out-
standing debts. You have had, and still have, many, many
faithful, unappreciated, unrequited services performed for you,
while their hearts are almost bursting with indignation at
your selfish indifference to their interests.

Again, Dr. McFarland, there was an eye-witness to that
kiss which you bestowed upon me in your office, when you
thought we were alone !

Your true friend, E. P. W. Packard, now takes her final
leave of you in your present detestable character. Men and
women are henceforth to be my chosen associates. And when
all traces of humanity are obliterated from a human form, I
shall regard that form only as a personified demon, whom I
am in duty bound to avoid, by holding no fellowship whatever
with him afterwards. t

Farewell, Dr. McFarland,

Your true friend,

Jacksonville, Nov. 12, 1860. E. P. W. Packaed.

MY REPROOF TO DR. McFARLAND. 137

*

p. S. — There are those in this ward, who have given me
their own voluntary pledge, in view of this document in these
words, viz:

" Mrs. Packard, I will stand by you in defence of that doc-
ument if it costs me my life."

" I will back that up, Mrs. Packard, if I die in doing it."

" If there is a hole or a dungeon in this building where Dr.
McFarland can put you as a punishment for your writing that
document, I will go with you and there die with you, before I
will recant one word of all you have said there, for it is the
truth, just as true as truth can make it."

Dr. McFarland, I say to you, beware!

The use of our God-given rights of opinion and rights of
speech are now to be protected to us by our only protector —
our Master — our Husband. And we are not afraid of this
Husband proving recreant to His high, noble office of protect-
ing His spouse, as the weaker vessel, who claims such protec-
tion.

You, our boasted protectors, have proved yourselves despots,
whom we can only despise.

Remember, Dr. McFarland, this is your last chance. The
fatal dyke is but a few moments ahead of you. Repentance
or exposure !

E. P. W. P.

CHAPTER XIV.

My Occupation.

As my readers now find me located in my new position, they
may, perhaps, like to know how I occupied myself. As it was
in consequence of my defence of others' rights and privileges
that I had lost my own, I now felt impelled by the same spirit,
to make others' wants my care, rather than care for myself,
by neglecting them. Indeed, I have found that the exercise
of this spirit, is, in reality, the best antidote I can find for an
oppressed spirit.

Paradoxical as it may seem, I think the best way to train
ourselves to bear heavy burdens, is to bear the burdens of
others.

It now seems to me, that unless I had known how to prac-
tically apply this principle, I must have inevitably sunk under
my burdens ; but the elasticity of spirit which benevolent acts
alone inspire, capacitates the spirit to rebound, where it would
otherwise be crushed by the pressure put upon it

And moreover, I summoned the will-power also to my rescue.
I determined not to be crushed, neither would I submit to see
others crushed. In other language, I determined to be a liv-
ing reprover ot tne evils existing here.

I did not intend to defend one line of conduct with my
tongue and pen, and endorse a different line by my actions. I
knew that preaching godliness had far less potency for good,
than practical godliness.

My sermon had already been preached ; now, all that I had
to do, was to put its principles into practice. I had asked
Dr. McFarland to ameliorate the condition of his patients ;
and now determined to aid him in this good work, to the
fullest extent ol my ability. Theretore, for months and years
from this date, 1 worked for this object almost exclusively.

MY OCCUPATION. 139

The attendants were very negligent in their duties ; still,
I did not feel disposed to blame or reprove them for these
neglects. Feeling that this duty fell on the Superintendent,
and having already given him the reproof which was his due,
I felt that 1 had no right to teach his attendants, only by the
silent influence of example. In short, I tried to fill up on my
part the defects of theirs.

I commenced this line of conduct on the Sabbath morning
succeeding my removal. As I have said, the patients were
in an exceedingly filthy condition, and therefore their personal
cleanliness was plainly my first most obvious duty.

This morning I commenced by coaxing as many of the pa-
tients as I could, to allow me to wash their face, neck and
hands in a bowl of warm, clean, soft suds ; and then sham-
pooed as many of their filthy "live" heads as I could find
time to do before chapel service.

When the Doctor visited the ward that morning, I cannot
forget the look of surprise he cast upon the row of clean faces
and combed hair he witnessed on the side seats of the hall.
Simply this process alone so changed their personal appear-
ance, that it is no wonder he had to gaze upon them to recog-
nize them. Their rough, tangled, flying and streaming hair
looked, when I began, as if a comb had never touched them.
He simply bowed to me and said:

" Good morning, Mrs. Packard ! "

And then seated himself upon one of these seats, and si-
lently watched my movements while I pursued this my own
chosen calling.

Without even alluding to the losses he had subjected me to,
I simply remarked :

" Doctor, I find there is always something that can be done
for the benefit of others, and you have now assigned me quite
a missionary field to cultivate ! "

" Yes," was his only response.

140 MODERN PERSECUTION.

He did not so much as ask me how I liked my new room,
or my new associates ! but after seeing me shampoo one or
two of his patients, he arose and left the hall, speechless.

The next day, Monday morning, I commenced the slow work
of reconstruction and recuperation of the human faculties in
sober earnest. I first obtained from my accommodating at-
tendant, a bowl of warm saleratus water and a quantity of
castile soap, a soft cloth and two towels, and a bowl of clear
soft water. I then took one patient at a time into her room
alone, and there gently stripped her and gave her a thorough
sponge bath of this saleratus and water and soap, and then
rinsed her well off with the pure water. I then laid aside all
her wet, filthy, saturated and offensive garments, and put clean
ones on in their place.

After combing her hair, I would introduce her into the ward
as a neat, clean, tidy lady, who was going to be an example in
these virtues to all others ! being careful, however, to prove
the truth of these compliments by tending upon her as I
would my cleanly dressed inlant. By vigilance on my part,
her clothes might be kept comparatively clean and dry for two
or three days, before another change would be necessary.

Having thus cleaned the occupant oi a room, I then cleaned
the room in the same manner, with the aid of a pail of strong
saleratus and water and scrubbing brush I would at length
succeed in finding the coat of paint I was seeking for, which
had to be done by dint of patient perseverance equal to that
required to find the skin of its occupant.

It is no exaggeration to say that I never before saw human
beings whose skins were so deeply embedded beneath so many
layers of dirt as those were. The part cleaned would contrast
so strikingly with the part not cleaned, that it would be diffi-
cult to believe they belonged to the same race, if on different
individuals.

But the scrubbing of the walls and the floor was not the only

MY OCCUPATION. 141

portion of the room to be cleaned, by any means. It was no
insignificant task to put the bedstead and the bed into a suit-
able condition for a human being to occupy. In many in-
stances, the husk mattress I found completely rotted through
with constantly repeated showers upon it, and this rot had in
most instances become a black as soot, and retained an effluvia
most difficult to tolerate.

With the aid of the Misses Tenny I had all these rotten beds
removed and emptied, and the ticks washed ; then I cut out
the mouldied part, and supplied its place with new cloth, and
had it filled again with fresh straw or husks, which completed
this part of the business. The sheets and blankets the passed
through the cleaning process ; but the white counterpanes
which covered up these filthy nets did not need cleaning.

They were kept white and clean, by being folded up every
nights and laid upon the seats in the hall, and in the day time
they were displayed upon the beds to advertise the neatness
and comfort of the house and beds !

But if a sick patient should chance to lie down upon one of
these advertisers of neatness, the white spreads, she was liable
to receive some of the severest punishments of this inquisitorial
prison, for this great offence against the " display of the house."

The cleaning of one patient and one room, together with
the waiting upon those I had cleaned, took one day's labor.
And this I continued, day after day, for about three weeks,
before I got these eighteen patients and their rooms all cleaned ;
and by this time the process needed to be repeated.

This I continued to do for nearly one year, until others
began to wake up to the necessity of doing likewise in their
wards, as ours was by this time reported to be the neatest
and best kept ward in the whole house ; even the odor of
which could not be surpassed in purity.

This contagion for amelioration extended even to the
Trustees, and as the result, at Dr. McFarland's suggestion,

142 MODERN PERSECUTION.

each ward was subsequently furnished with a nice bathing
tub, which the Trustees designed only for the comfort of the
patients, as the Doctor urged the need now of the weekly
bathing of all the patients.

But I am sorry to add, this great luxui , _ike ^ne institution
itself, has degenerated into the greatest torment to the patient.
The bath-room is regarded by the prisoners there as the
" calaboose " used to be by the slaves at the South.

The Doctor visited this ward almost every day, but never ^o
ameliorate my condition, or that of any other prisoner, so far
as I could see. He would see the great drops of sweat rolling
off from my face, Irom the excessive exercise this scrubbing
and mopping afforded me, but I do not recollect that he ever
advised me to desist. But Miss Tenny has told me that he
had said to her :

" You must not let Mrs. Packard work too hard, for I am
afraid her husband won't like it."

I do not think the Doctor cared for this ameliorated condi-
tion of his prisoners ; but he dared not oppose it directly,
since the filthiness of the Eighth ward had become so prover-
bial, it became a source of apprehension lest these mephitic
exhalations might breed a pestilence in the Hospital.

The typhoid fever had raged there during the summer
months preceding this expurgating process. During this
sickness, the Doctor had assigned to my care some of these
typhoid patients, whom I nursed and tended night and day.

I made the shroud for Mrs. Hart, from Chicago, who died
of this epidemic -here. Mrs. Hart had been a most unwilling
prisoner for seven long years, and from all I can learn, sincerely
believe she has been a victim of marital cruelty, and never was
insane. Her husband put her in without trial, and the Doc-
tor took her on his testimony, and kept her to please him, all
the while knowing, as I believe, that she was not insane.

This is only one of many of those innocent victims who

MY OCCUPATION. 14&

have been falsely imprisoned for life, under that most barbar-
ous law of Illinois, which suspends the personal liberty of mar-
ried women, entirely upon the capricious will of her husband.

I saw Mr. Hart, her husband, who came simply for appear-
ance, as it seemed to me, to see her during her last sickness,
but who became so very impatient for her death, that he could
not stay to see her die, although it was almost certain she could
not live two days longer, when he left.

Thus, his wife, whom his will alone had deprived of her
children, home, and liberty for seven years, could not have her
dying request granted, that he stay by her to close her eyes,
but left, and cooly ordered her body to be sent home to Chi-
cago, by express, in a decent coffin when she did die. I
helped to dress the corpse of the unfortunate victim. I saw
her passed into the hands of four stranger men in the dead
of night, and carried mournerless, and alone, to the depot, to
be sent to her children and husband, at Chicago.

Oh ! what reckless sundering of human ties are caused by
this Insane Asylum system !

These children are taught to regard their mother as a worth-
less being, because she had the cruel brand of insanity placed
upon her by her husband, signed and sealed by a corrupt pub-
lic servant, whom a blinded public were regarding as an
almost infallible man. Thus have the holiest ties of nature
been most ruthlessly sundered by the perfidy of this perverted
Institution.

As I witnessed the sum of all our social evils culminating
in this most corrupt Institution, I resolved that henceforth,
and for ever, my occupation should be, to eradicate, expose,
and destroy this sum of all human abominations — the Insane
Asylum system, on its present basis.

CHAPTER XV.

Evidences of My Insanity.

When a person is once accused of being insane, the reflective
mind naturally inquires, how is their insanity manifested?

This question was often put to Mr. Packard, and knowing
all would not be satisfied by his simple assertion, he was obliged
to manufacture his proof or evidence to satisfy this class.

One evidence on which he placed great reliance was, "that
his wife invited Universalist ministers to his house for enter-
tainment during a convention."

Yes, I do plead guilty to this charge. I did offer the hos-
pitalities of our house to ministers of this class under these
circumstances.

It was at Mount Pleasant, Iowa, that this convention met
and dedicated anew church, located a few rods from our house.
To my great surprise Mr. Packard proposed to attend this
dedication, which he did, and I accompanied him, and listened
to a sermon of high literary merit, and to me, a morally sound
and logical argument was for the first time presented to my
mind, that God's infinite love and wisdom were sure guarantees
of the world's redemption. The position was this : " Where
there is both will and power to cure, no evil can endure."

The church was crowded to overflowing, and the conven-
tion being larger in numbers than their own people could con-
veniently accommodate, the chairman of the committee of
arrangements presented this fact to the congregation, and very
kindly solicited their neighbors and friends, who could do so,
to take them into their families, and all such were asked to
leave their names at the stand as they passed out.

Since but a short time previous, the Congregationalist
society had so large an association they had been obliged to

EVIDENCES OF MY INSANIT 145

solicit the hospitalities of other denominations, and as I had
called upon our Universalist neighbors to accommodate us, I
instinctively felt that it was only a just acknowledgment of
civility, to extend to ministers of their denomination the same
hospitality.

Therefore, as I passed down the aisle by my husband's side
I whispered to him that I could accommodate two.

" Shall I give in our names for two ? "

He paid no attention to me or my inquiry, but passed on by
the stand without speaking to any one.

Seeing it devolved upon me to make the offer, if made at all,
I stepped up and gave in my name for two and passed on and
overtook Mr. Packard a few steps from the door, and taking
his arm said:

" I have offered to take two, and I must now hasten home
and prepare for them."

He made no reply whatever, but his silence said :

" I don't approve of it."

Therefore I reasoned in defence of the act as one of justice,
Btc. ; and besides, as all the labor of serving the tables,
as well as the services of the maid of all work devolved upon
me, I felt that if I was willing to do all this extra work, no
one could reasonably object.

But fortunately for me, I had hardly commenced my prepa-
rations when the chairman called and informed me that their
friends were all provided for, so that my services were not
needed ; and after kindly thanking me for my hospitable offer
he left me, with the feeling on my part of having done my
duty, and here the subject was dropped.

But years after, to my surprise and horror, Mr. Packard
brought this act up as evidence of my insanity ! and his argu-
ment against me was, that if they had come, he might, in
courtesy , have been obliged to have asked a Universalist minister
to ask a blessing at his table, or even to lead in family prayers !
7

146 MODERN PERSECUTION.

and, only think ! this too, in the presence of his children !
Another evidence of insanity, as he claims is, that I asked
for a letter of dismission from our church, and recommenda-
tion to the Methodist church in Manteno.

As our church refused me. a letter, my request for admis-
sion into the Methodist church was granted, by receiving me
as a candidate on six months probation. Within two weeks
from this time I was kidnapped, and as my six months proba-
tion expired during my incarceration, I, of course, could not
be received into full fellowship while there.

And when after three years I returned to Manteno and
found my family dispersed, and satisfied it was to be no longer
a home for me, I decided not to present myself to the
Methodist church as a probationary candidate, and having
never been dismissed from my own church, remained, of course,
still a member of the Congregational church. The church in
Manteno was Congregational when I joined it, and became
Presbyterian after I left it. Therefore I claim to be a member
of the Congregational church at the present time, since to my
knowledge my membership has never been suspended or
removed.

Another evidence of insanity he alleged against me, was,
that I gave a dollar towards building a Catholic church in
Manteno.

I plead guilty to this charge also. We had a very kind
Christian neighbor in Mr. La Brie, who was a Catholic from
principle, in the same sense that Mr. Packard was a Presbyte-
rian from principle ; that is, both had been educated to feel
that their own was the true church, and therefore both were
conscientious in sustaining them. Mr. Packard was trying to
build up Presbyterianism by his efforts, and he, of course, ex-
pected to be paid for doing this work; but the society was
new and feeble, and therefore in their struggles to raise his
salary, the collector, Deacon Smith, called on Mr. La Brie to

EVIDENCES OF MY INSANITY. 147

help them, and he with true Christian charity, contributed
yearly to Mr. Packard's support.

One evening I called on Mr. La Brie, to ask his opinion re-
specting my article on " Spiritual Gifts," which our Bible-class
had refused to hear, and he very patiently listened and com-
mented upon it. He expressed his opinion that it was a
sound, logical, and invincible argument in favor of what the
Catholics had always considered the true view.

This assertion very much surprised me, as I had always been
taught to believe that the Catholics were a deluded people, be-
lieving nothing but absurdities ; but now, when I found
that I had alone studied out a view of truth which they had
always endorsed, and one to which our church would not so
much as listen, lest it might be found to be heretical, I began
to ask where religious toleration is to be found, in the Presby-
terian or the Catholic church ? I had here found the Chris-
tian spirit of charity and religious toleration manifested to a
far higher degree in Mr. La Brie, the Catholic, than in Deacon
Smith, the Presbyterian.

I therefore came to the conclusion that there were not only
truths in the Catholic church, but good Christians also.

As the scales of bigotry thus fell from my own eyes, I could
see that the Catholics were just as conscientious in sustaining
their church, as we were in sustaining ours ; and finding what
struggles they were making to pay their debts, I felt moved
to manifest my new feeling of toleration, by giving him one
dollar towards helping them liquidate their debt. And now,
for this act of toleration I am called insane ! for Mr. Packard
argues that I should not thus be building up this " mother of
all abominations," this " seat of bigotry and intolerance,"
unless I had lost my reason.

The reason which remains in exercise in my organization
teaches me that there are truths and errors in all denomina-
tions and parties, and our reason is only normally exercised,

148 MODERN PERSECUTION.

in my opinion, when we use it in separating the good and
true, from the evil and false.

Again, he says I call him the " son of perdition."

I shall not plead guilty to this charge, for it is not strictly
true.

I have oftentimes tried to convince Mr. Packard that he
was not a " totally depraved " man. But all in vain. He
seems strangely determined to cling to this crowning virtue
of his Christian character, with a death-like grapple ! It
seems that all his hopes of heaven are built upon this founda-
tion stone ! In his creed, there can be no real virtue without
it. So tenaciously does he cling to this position as the only
redeeming trait of his character, that I have sometimes been
tempted to say :

" Well, Mr. Packard, I do not know but that you are what
you claim to be, a totally depraved man, or the ' son of per-
dition,' for whom there is not found a ransom."

When I come to admit his own position, and express an
agreement of opinion with him, on this point, then he uses
this concession as a weapon against me, as though I had
accused him of being the " son of perdition."

Again, he accuses me of punishing the children for obeying
their father.

This is not true.

I never did punish a child for obeying their father, but I
have sometimes been compelled to enforce obedience to their
father's authority, by interposing my own. Indeed, I think
my children could never have reverenced their father's
authority, without the maternal influence to inspire it, by
requiring subjection to it ; for the fitful, unstable, and arbi-
trary government he exercised over them, was only fitted,
naturally, to inspire contempt, rather than reverence.

But Mr. Packard has tried to undermine my authority, by
telling the children they need not obey their mother, and I

EVIDENCES OF MY INSANITY. 149

have been obliged to counteract this influence, by enforcing
obedience, sometimes, where he has interposed and forbid their
obeying me.

This is what he calls punishing the children, for obeying
their father, whereas, it is only requiring them to obey their
mother.

Another evidence, and one which his sister, Mrs. Dole, pre-
sented to the jury on my trial, was, that I once made biscuit
for dinner, when I had unexpected company call, and had not
bread enough for the table.

The reason why this was mentioned, was because the coun-
sel insisted on evidence being produced from my own actions,
independent of opinions that I was insane, and she having been
more intimate in our family than any other person, was com-
pelled, under oath, to state what she saw. Being unwilling to
own she had seen nothing insane in my conduct, and being
bound to speak only the truth, she told this circumstance as
the greatest act of insanity she had noticed.

But I trust my readers will be satisfied with this array of
evidence which my persecutors brought against me, if I only
add the sum total of proof as produced by Dr. Brown, an M. D.
of Kankakee city, whom Mr. Packard bought to say I was in-
sane, for the purpose of getting me incarcerated again for life
in Northampton Asylum, Mass. This Doctor had left the
wheelwright business and studied just long enough to ex-
perience the sophomorical feeling that his opinion would be
entitled to infallibility, especially if given in the high-flown
language of an expert ; therefore, the last of fifteen reasons
why he considered me insane, was in these words, as taken
down by the reporter at the time, viz :

" I have founded my opinion that she is insane, from her
viewing the subject of religion from the osteric standpoint of
Christian exegetical analysis, and agglutinating the polsyn-
thetical ectoblasts of homogeneous asceticism ! "

150 MODERN PERSECUTION.

The basis on which Dr. McFarland's argument rests can be
best given in his own language, as given to members of the
Legislature when called upon "to prove Mrs. Packard's in-
sanity. "

Said he, " in the first place, everybody is insane — the degrees
are as various as the individuals of the human family. But in
Mrs. Packard's case, the variation from sanity to insanity is so
very slight, it can only be discerned by a thoroughly educated
expert ! There is not one in a thousand who can possibly
detect it. In fact, the variation in her case is the slightest
there can possibly be. Nevertheless, the slighter the variation
the more hopeless the case ! "

Thus, according to the opinion of this celebrated expert, I
am the sanest of all human beings, since it is impossible for
any one to be less insane than the " slightest there can possibly
be ! " If I am the " slightest," of course, every other human
being is more so. And the sanest person in the world is the
most hopeless case of Insanity !

The age would do well to immortalize Dr. Brown and Dr.
McFarland, for their profound logic and sound common sense !

However, charity to this poor sinner compels me to add the
testimony of one of the most intelligent employers in that in-
stitution, as a true index of Dr. McFarland's honest convictions
on this subject, viz :

" Mrs. Packard, I can assure you, that there is not a single
individual in this house who believes you are an insane person ;
and as for Dr. McFarland he knows you are not ? "

Another gentleman in Jacksonville, after having become per-
sonally acquainted with me, remarked to another, "that man
who will call Mrs. Packard an insane person, is not fit to live."

It is a great satisfaction to me to believe that all who knew
me personally in the Asylum, have entire confidence in my
sanity, not even excepting D r . McFarland . And I fully believe
that Miss Mary Lynch, the supervisoress, expressed this heart-
fccling of them all, when she said to me :

EVIDENCES OF MY INSANITY. \^\

" Mrs. Packard, I believe you to be in the full exercise of all
your mental faculties, with a sound mind, and no single act of
yours have I ever known to contradict or invalidate this testi-
mony."

In addition to this I will only add the testimony of Mrs.
Hosmer, the sewing-room directress, as given to Rev. A. D.
Eddy, D. D., in reply to his question:

" How is Mrs. Packard at times ?

" You have seen Mrs. Packard once — you have seen her
always."

CHAPTER XVI.

The Attendant who Abused Me.

Mrs. De La Ha}', wife of Dr. De La Hay, of Jacksonville, was
the only one of all the employees at the Asylum whom the
Doctor could influence to treat me like an insane person.

She has threatened me with the screen-room, and this threat
has been accompanied with the flourish of the butcher knife
over my head, for simply passing a piece of Johnny cake
through a crevice under my door, to a hungry patient who was
locked in her room to suffer starvation, as her discipline for
her insanity.

Besides threatening me with the screen-room, she threatened
to jacket me for speaking at the table.

I will here describe a screen-room and a straight-jacket. A
screen-room is simply one of the ordinary sleeping rooms or
cells, with an inside blind or screen, made of perforated tin,
covering the window, which can be opened or closed by a key,
to keep fractious patients from breaking it.

A straight-jacket is a strong closely fitting waist, with sleeves
coming below the hand and sewed up, with a loop-hole through
which can be passed a strong cord. Their arms are then
crossed in front with their hands tied tightly behind them,
thus depriving them of all use of their arms or hands.

One day, after she had been treating her patients with great
injustice and cruelty, I addressed Mrs. McKonkey, who sat
next to me at the table, and in an undertone remarked :

" I am thankful there is a recording angel present, noting
what is going on in these wards."

When Mrs. De La Hay, overhearing my remark, exclaimed,
in a very angry tone :

THE ATTENDANT WHO ABUSED ME. 153

" Mrs. Packard, stop your voice ! if you speak another
word at the table I shall put a straight-jacket on you ! "

Mrs. Lovel, one of the prisoners, replied :

" Mrs. De La Hay, did you ever have a straight-jacket on
yourself?"

" No, my position protects me ! But I would as soon put
one on Mrs. Packard as. any other patient, ' recording angel '
or no ' recording angel ! ' And Dr. McFarland will protect
me in doing so, too."

On another occasion, hearing the sound of conflict in our
ward, I opened my door, and saw Mrs. De La Hay seize Miss
Mary Rollins, a patient, by her throat, and Mary pulled the
hair ol Mrs. De La Hay with as firm a grip as she held on to
her victim's throat. I, fearing the result, rallied help and
parted them, when I lound poor Mary's throat bleeding from
an opening Mrs. De La Hay had made in it with her linger
nails.

I took a piece of my own linen, and bound it up, wet in
cold water ; and this cloth I still retain, red with the blood of
this innocent girl, as proof of this kind of abuse in Jackson-
ville Insane Asylum:

It was my deience of the patients from Mrs. De La Hay's
unreasonable abuse which led her to treat me as she did.

It was not long after this deience of Mary Rollins, that I
heard loud screams and groans issuing from a dormitory,
when I and my associates rushed into the room to see what
was the matter. There we found one of the patients lying
upon her back, with Mrs. De La Hay over her, trying' to put
on a straight-jacket.

The lady was screaming from physical agony, on account
of an injury Mrs. De La Hay had inflicted upon her a few
days before, when she burst a blood vessel on her lungs, by
strangling her under the water. The plunging she had in-
flicted as her punishment for not obeying her when she told
7*

154 MODERN PERSECUTION.

her to stop talking. And now this wounded spot on her lungs
had become so inflamed, that the pressure of Mrs. De La Hay's
hands upon it, together with the stricture of the straight-
jacket, caused her to scream from agony. I inquired :

" "What is the matter ? Why are you putting the straight-
jacket on that woman ? "

Without answering my question, she exclaimed in a loud
voice :

" Mrs. Packard, Leave this room ! "

I backed out over the threshold, still looking towards her
victim and repeated my question :

" Why are you putting her into the straight-jacket ? What
has she done ? "

This time, she left her victim, and came at me in a great
rage, and seizing my arm she said :

" Go to your room ! "

As she was leading me unresistingly along, one of the
patients took hold of her arm, and exclaimed :

" Mrs. De La Hay, do you know what you are about ? Do
you know that it is Mrs. Packard you are locking up ? "

" Yes, I do, and I am obeying Dr. McFarland in what I
am doing. He tells me not to let Mrs. Packard interfere with
the management of the patients."

She led me to my room, where I was locked up until the
next morning. While there, I heard the Doctor's footsteps
in the hall, and heard Mrs. De La Hay tell him why she had
locked me up, and he sanctioned the act by leaving me locked
up, without coming to my room at all.

The next day I ascertained, that she was disciplining this
dormitory patient with the straight-jacket, because she had
found her upon her bed, trying to rest herself from the pain
this rupture on her lungs was causing her.

So far as Mrs. De La Hay's treatment of me was concerned,
I did not consider her so much to blame, as Dr. McFarland

THE ATTENDANT WHO ABUSED ME. 155

was. Unlike my other attendants, she was too weak to resist
the Doctor's influence, and therefore carried out his wishes,
while the others would not. Had the other attendants carried
out his wishes, my asylum discipline would have been as
severe as that of the other prisoners.

It was a very noticeable fact, that the very means Mrs. De
La Hay used to secure and retain the Doctor's favor, byabus
ing me, was the very excuse the Doctor made for discharging
her ; and the boast that her " position " protected her from
the straight-jacket, did not prove a very defensive armor, for
in a few months from the time she uttered it, she became in-
sane and a tenant of the Jacksonville Poor-House !

CHAPTER XVII.

" Let Dr. MeFarland Bear his own Sins ! "

One day while in my room, I heard an uncommon noise in
our ward, when, on suddenly opening the door, I saw nearly
opposite, Dr. MeFarland just as he had released his grasp of
Bridget's throat, who had been struggling for her life, to avoid
strangulation from his grasp. I did not see the Doctor's
hand upon her throat, but I did see what she said were the
marks of his thumb on one side of her throat, and of his fin-
gers upon the other, and Bridget had a sore neck for some
days afterwards, in consequence of it. Bridget's, the patient,
account of the matter is this :

"The Doctor entered the ward just after a patient had
broken a chair, and the pieces were still lying upon the floor.
I stood by while Mrs. De La Hay explained the case to the
Doctor, simply as a listener. I had had nothing to do with
breaking the chair. Mrs. DeLaHay also stood by, waiting the
Doctor's orders. The Doctor turned to me and said :

' Pick up those pieces, Bridget ! '

" I shan't do it ! I didn't come here to work. It is your
attendant's business to do the work. He then, without saying
a word, seized me by the throat, and the noise you heard was
my struggle for deliverance."

" Why, Bridget ! How dare you speak so to the Doctor ?
Why didn't you obey him ? "

" I wouldn't have done it if he had killed me ! I didn't
come here to do his work, and I wont do it ! "

This was Bridget's account, and it was confirmed, not only
by all the witnessing patients, but also by Mrs. De La Hay
Herself.

Bridget was a quiet, inoffensive patient. I never saw her

LET DR. McFARLAND BEAR HIS. OWN SINS. 157

evince anything but reasonable conduct, when she was reason-
ably dealt by, and she was one of my dormitory companions
for many months. She was always obedient to reasonable
commands ; but, like human beings generally, she felt that she
had rights of her own which ought to be respected.

Bridget has immortalized herself in my memory, by the
lesson in theology she taught me the first night I occupied the
room with her. It was under these circumstances. As was
my uniform practice, I kneeled in front of my bed that night,
before I got into it, to offer my silent prayer for protection
and help, when Bridget, from the opposite bed, exclaimed :

" Pray aloud ! "

I obeyed.

This being the first night of my consignment to this loath-
some place, I had to struggle mentally, against the indulgence
of revengeful feelings towards the Doctor, for the injustice of
the act ; therefore, to crush them out, I tried to pray for his
forgiveness, and in doing so I made use of the expression :

" Lord, I am willing to even bear his punishment for him,
if, by this means he can be forgiven for this act of injustice
towards me."

Just at this point, Bridget interrupted me by exclaiming
with great vehemence :

" Let Dr. McFarland bear his own sins ! "

I am now of Bridget's mind entirely. Her sermon con-
verted me from the theological error of vicarious suffering. I
have never since asked my Father to let me bear the punish-
ment of any other brother or sister, due them for their own
sins ; neither have I asked any other intelligence to bear the
punishment due me for my own sins.

CHAPTER XVIII.

Attempted Reconciliation "with Mr.
Packard.

The last letter I wrote to Mr. Packard, I told him plainly
on what conditions I would return to him. But it seems Dr.
McFarland was not willing we should be reconciled on such a
basis, for he would not send the letter although Mr. Packard
was calling most persistently for letters from me.

But he called in vain, as I said in this letter, I should never
answer any more of his letters, nor write to him again until
this letter was answered.

He begged of the Superintendent to get me to write, and
he would show me these letters, when I would tell him :

" When I get a reply to my last letter I will write, but not
before, and if you, Doctor, ever wish me to write to him again,
send that letter first ! "

But like the deaf adder, he heard as though he heard not,
and that ever repeated question would come :

" Why don't you write to Mr. Packard ? "

" If you cannot understand my reason, and will not report
it to Mr. Packard, he must ever remain in ignorance of the
reason I do not write to him."

But it seems he never communicated these messages, nor
would he send the letter, but simply told him :

" I cannot persuade her to write to you."

Finally, Dr. Sturtevant informed me, that Mr. Packard had
wished him to try to persuade me to write to him, and he asked
me why I could not grant his request. I told him I had writ-
ten, and the Doctor had the letter but he would not send it,
and just as soon as that letter was satisfactorily answered, I
would open a free correspondence with him.

ATTEMPTED RECONCILIATION. 159

Whether the Doctor allowed him to report my only true
reason I know not, but after that, the Doctor told me he had
burned my letter because he considered it " worthless."

I know not whether this was the letter he thus disposed of,
or some of my many others I had given him to send to other
friends. This fact I do know, that so long as my letters were
sent through this post-office, my friends never received them,
with one or two exceptions. My journal contains copies of
all these letters, which I have shown to those family friends
to whom they were written, and they tell me they never re-
ceived them.

Now here is a branch of the United States mail established
within this public Institution, and the mail carrier transports
it regularly, protected by lock and key, and yet I could not
get a letter into it, nor get one from it, although directed
directly to me.

Indeed, I felt most keenly the truth of the remark the mail
carrier made me, when I once met him and inquired if he had
any letters for me.

Said he, " Mrs. Packard, you have just as good a right to
your mail as any other citizen of the United States."

" Why then is not this right granted me?"

Because one man chooses to say :

" I will superintend this inalienable right, and usurp it when
I please, and no one can harm me in so doing."

I ask this Republican Government, is this protecting the
post-office rights of all its citizens ?

Who has a right to say, while I am not a criminal :

" You shall be restricted in this right. You shall have this
right usurped and ignored to any extent, as a punishment for
being numbered among the most afflicted class of American
citizens ! "

These terrible despotisms would be a far less dangerous in-
stitution, were the boarders allowed their post-office rights.

160 MODERN PERSECUTION.

If this right had not been usurped, in my case, it might
have saved one family from the wreck of disunion. But Dr.
McFarland would not allow a reasonable basis of reconcilia-
tion to be even presented for his consideration.

Why was this ? Was he unwilling there should be a recon-
ciliation ? Why should he wish to stand between me and my
husband ?

These questions I leave my readers to answer.

He talked as though he wished I would go to my husband,
but he acted as though he had determined to make an im-
passable gulf between us.

Well, if my husband will voluntarily resign his right to be
the protector of his own wife, exclusively into the hands of
a stranger man, can he blame this man for misusing this
irresponsible trust ?

This voluntary resignation of the marital right into the
absolute, irresponsible control of another, is an unnatural act,
and therefore must be deleterious in its consequence. Dr.
McFarland had become an adept in this nefarious work, and
therefore he found ways and means of disbanding this hitherto
happy family, forever.

Although Mr. Packard is not responsible for Dr. McFarland's
sins, yet, like the drunkard, he is responsible for allowing this
exposure to exist. He should have exercised some sort of
supervision over his own wife's destiny, so far, at least, as to
retain his own rights unmolested.

So should the State exercise such a supervision over their
own institution as not to allow their own State rights to be
trampled under foot by it, as it now does, in thus suffering
the dearest of all human rights to be utterly ignored.

The following are the terms I tried to send to my husband
as the basis of a just union — the only kind of union that
would ever receive my sanction again.

" 1st. Mr. Packard must make the confession as public as he

ATTEMPTED RECONCILIATION. 161

had made the offence, that his wife has never given him any
cause for regarding, or treating her as an insane person.

"2d. He must allow me the unmolested exercise of my own
rights of opinion, and conscience, and post-office rights.

" 3d. He must allow me to hold my own property in my own
name, and subject to my own control.

" 4th. He must allow me to control my own children with a
mother's authority, so far as the mother's province extends.

" 5th. He must allow me to be the head of my own house-
hold duties, and the mistress of my own hired girl.

" 6th. The attempted usurpation of either of these inalien-
able rights of a married woman, shall be considered as a
dissolution of the Union."

I know such stipulations serve rather to ignore a husband's
protection, as indeed they do ; but where neither love nor
reason will hold a man to be the protector of these, his wife's
rights, what can the wife of such a man do, without some
such stipulation, or laws, by which her identity, as a woman,
can be maintained ?

The first is only virtually acknowledging my identity or
accountability ; that is, I am not a chattel, or an insane per-
son, but a being, after I am married, as well as before ; and
unless a man can hold me upon a higher plane than the prin-
ciple of common law places me upon, I am not willing to
enter the marriage union.

The law says I am a non-existent being after marriage, but
God says I am an existent and accountable one still ; therefore
I claim the recognition of this higher law principle, or I com-
promise with this injustice by this act of disloyalty to myself.

The conclusion of my last letter to Mr. Packard, dated April
28, 1861, ends thus :

" And ere we finally part, allow me to call to your recollec-
tion that most important period of your life, when, at the altar
of your God, in the presence of your fellow witnesses, you sol-

162 MODERN PERSECUTION.

enmly vowed to love your wife, to comfort her. to honor her,
and keep her in sickness and in health, for better and for
worse, in poverty and riches, and forsaking all others, to keep
thou only unto her, so long as both should live. Let me ask
you, have you kept this solemn vow ? Your lost Elizabeth."

About this time I had a letter from Mr. Packard,. wherein
he lays his plans before me, and asks my advice !

His plans were to break up the family and put out the
children, and asks me to whom he shall give my babe, and to
whom he shall give my daughter to bring up, and such like
questions !

But not a single intimation is expressed that the mother
would ever be allowed the right to rear her own offspring.
No, not even a wish that he hoped I might ever be able or
capable of doing so ; yet he could ask the counsel and advice
of this non compos on these most important matters of vital
interest !

He then portrays the present condition of my family in
facts like these. He says :

" Elizabeth has had a fall and hurt her side, so that it pains
her most of the time, and yet does all the work for the family ?
except when her Aunt Dole comes and helps a day
occasionally."

Poor child! how her mother longs to embrace her, and
sympathize with her as she used to in my sorrows. How can
a father put upon this child of eleven years, the cares of a
woman— the care of a babe, in addition to the care of a
family, while she needs to attend school !

Oh ! how much inconvenience some men will almost cheer-
fully endure, to crush a married woman into that position of
nonentity, which the common law of marriage assigns her.

Isaac too is feeling almost discouraged. He is so gentle in
his disposition, he can not live without his mother's sympathy.

Oh ! my darling boy, be patient. God's time to help us is not

ATTEMPTED RECONCILIATION . \§§

yet come. I know it is hard for thy tender heart to wait so
long. I can hardly bear it myself.

Patient waiting is the hardest virtue for me to exercise. I
had much rather work and toil than wait. But I will sur-
mount all obstacles, and conquer all my impulsive feelings,
by schooling them into entire submission to all God's appoint-
ments. If we could see all God's plans as God sees them, we
should be satisfied.

While these reflections were passing through my mind,
Dr. McFarland called at my room and remarked :

" Well, Mrs. Packard, what of the Manteno letter ? "

" The family are all going to destruction ; and his plan is
to present such a view to my mind, as will induce me, for my
children's sake, to plead to go home. He is trying to make
me say :

" Oh ! husband do take me home ! if you only will, I will
think, speak and act just as you please to have me, and will
never venture to think for myself again ! " But this plan
fails entirely. I shall never give him a chance to put me off
a second time."

Then came his usual inquiry :

" Have you a letter to send ? "

I then told him :

" Sir, do you think I shall submit to be thus trifled with ?
you know you will not send the letter I want you to send ?

CHAPTER XIX.

Letter to my Children sent to the
Wash-tub.

Among my asylum papers I find a copy of a letter I wrote
to my children on some cotton underwaists, which I tried to
send by Miss Wilson, of Kankakee city. As all communica-
tion with my children was cut off by the authority of Dr.
McFarland, I was led to resort to strategy to secure this end.

Therefore I procured some nicely dressed bleached cotton,
and embroidered for my daughter some double underwaists,
on which I could easily and legibly pencil a long communica-
tion, such as my feelings prompted, hoping thus to bring
myself to their recollection, so that I might not become an
object of indifference to them.

The Doctor knew that I was making these waists for her,
and it seems he suspected the plan which might thus open
some kind of communication between us. Therefore as Miss
Wilson was leaving, as a discharged patient, for her home in
Kankakee, he, knowing that my Manteno home was only
twelve miles from there, took her aside and asked her if she
had any letter from me with her.

She replied that she had no letter.

" Have you anything from Mrs. Packard to her children ?"

"Yes, I have some waists for her daughter, which I
promised to take to her."

" Let me see them ! "

She then took them from *,er bosom, where she had placed
them for concealment, and handed them to the doctor. He
unfolded them and saw the penciling on the inside, and after
reading it, ordered them to the laundry to be washed and
ironed before they could be sent ! thus thinking he had swept
the letter into oblivion.

LETTER SENT TO THE WASHTUB. 165

But his sagacity was outwitted by his prisoner this time,
for if the exultant Doctor felt that all traces of my intelli-
gence and sanity had been obliterated by the destruction of my
letters, he will now see he was mistaken, when he sees this
printed copy was preserved to be my passport to the world, of
the state of this prisoner's mind while behind his dead-locks,
and numbered among his " hopelessly insane maniacs."

Insane Asylum, June 20, 1861.

My Beloved Children : — So long as we are sure we have
conscience and God on our side, we have nothing to fear, al-
though we are maligned by those who deny that conscience is
designed as our guide. Let these who dare to disregard this
silent monitor do so ; but you, my children, will with me, dare
to " serve the Lord," won't you ? For it is only fidelity to its
dictates which the Lord requires as his service.

You are in danger of losing your souls by contact with those
who encourage you to set aside conscience as your guide to
heavenly happiness. In this net of false doctrines, Satan is
ensnaring guileless souls, and leading them unawares into
captivity to himself. Do, children, be warned, and escape
this snare before it is too late.

But, children, since we cannot secure the safety of any
soul in opposition to their freedom, I rejoice that God does
not hold us absolutely responsible for any soul but our own.

To save ourselves depends upon ourselves ; and he who is
fully determined to " work out his own salvation with fear and
trembling," is the only one who will experience this salvation.

Children, do right in everything whether you are praised
or blamed, and you will certainly secure a crown of righte-
ousness, and so long as you continue to do right, no one can
take it from you.

But one sin, one wrong act, may forfeit it forever ; as only
a small stream may drown one if he lies prostrate in it.

IQQ MODERN PERSECUTION.

Oh ! beware of little sins, little deviations from rectitude,
truth, honesty, uprightness, from kindness, from forbearance,
from patience, from forgiveness, from charity.

Encourage the very incipient beginnings of repentance on
the part of offenders, by showing that your heart yearns and
longs to meet it with forgiveness, with God-like forgiveness,
bestowed on the gospel ground of repentance.

But, children, I fear you will think mother is preaching you
a sermon instead of writing a letter. Pardon me, if I have
burdened you thus, for you know this is not your mother's
way to teach you Christ's religion. Her way has been to
practice godliness, and thus endeavor to be a " living epistle
known and read of all men." But being absent, I am under
the necessity of taking this method of instructing you.

Your mother is doing here as she did at home, trying to
secure her happiness in doing right ; although by so doing, I
often offend others by becoming thus a " terror to the evil
doer, as well as a praise of them that do well."

I cannot express how much I regret the course your father
has taken in separating me from your society and sympathy.
But he is alone responsible for a great wrong by so doing.

Oh ! how I do rejoice now that I never wronged that man !
I beg of you to do the same.

Keep clear of guilt, however much he may tempt you. Re-
member, that to be angry, is but to punish yourself for
another's fault. Love yourselves too well to do it, for you
cannot be really happy if you sin in the leak thing.

I do feel deeply sorry you have so desolate a home. But
be patient, and all will be right some time.

Never do the least thing but what you would be willing the
whole world should know of it, for even your motives will all
be revealed and exposed, either to your. shame or glory.

This fact rejoices my heart ; for could the world see my
heart as it is, as God sees it, naught but love and good will to

LETTER SENT TO THE WASHTUB . 167

all mankind, to every individual, could be found there. Time
will develop that even my persecutors cannot find a truer
friend to them than I am — none more ready and impatient to
forgive them, if they will but repent.

Don't be discouraged or disheartened, although the dark-
ness which envelopes us is so dense as to be felt, for these
clouds are about to break in blessings upon our heads.
" Behind a frowning Providence he hides a smiling face."

Do your routine of duties faithfully, as you used to do when
I was your guardian, and God will take care of our destiny.
I do fully believe he is now working for us in the best possible
manner.

When we do meet, shan't we have enough to talk about ?
Won't we have " good talking times" as you used to say,
when you sat in a circle about me, to hear me tell you true
stories about my childhood ? But good by, for the present.
Your Loving Mother,

E. P. W. P.

CHAPTER XX.

How I Obtained my first Writing Paper.

On March 9th, 1861, I was allowed to pack the trunk of
one of my most intimate associates in our Ward, Mrs. Betsey
Clarke, who was to leave the next morning with her son, who
had come for her. While packing it I had the good fortune
to find four sheets of letter paper which had escaped the
supervisor's notice.

My good friend readily consented to let me have it in ex-
change for some articles of my wardrobe which she needed,
and thus I, an asylum prisoner, became the honest owner of
four sheets of paper ! A prize almost invaluable to me.

Hitherto all my efforts to obtain a sheet of paper had been
futile, since the Doctor had given a general order to all the
employees not to let me have paper or stationery of any kind
after he had consigned me to this maniac's hall.

I had written before this time on tissue paper, margin of
newspapers, cotton cloth, or brown paper and such like, and
had handed clandestinely letters written on these materials to
the trustees and Dr. Sturtevant, our chaplain, and retained
copies of the same on the materials where I now find them.

With these helps I had kept a private journal, too, from
which the facts of this book are compiled.

Now, with these three sheets, I felt, under the circumstances,
richer than any fortune could have made me. With a very
fine pencil, I was enabled to write two or three times the
number of lines that were ruled, so that I put a wonderful
amount of matter on a very small surface.

Mrs. Hosmer, the sewing room directress, knowing how
eagerly I watched her sewing room to get such writing ma-
terials, ventured to try an experiment to gratify this wish or

MY FIRST WRITING PAPER. 169

my part. Being a strict observer of all the rules of the
house, she could not aid me in this desire without the Doctor's
consent.

She therefore bought a pocket diary, and asked Dr. McFar-
land's permission to make me a present of it on " New Year's."

He consented, and I thus came into possession of another
treasure of inestimable value.

I used this most faithfully for one entire year, and had just
written my final entry for the last day of December, and was
just returning it into my bosom, its safe hiding place for one
whole year, when lo ! my door was suddenly and unexpectedly
pushed open by the Doctor in his velvet slippers; he thus
caught me, before my treasure was out of sight.

He sprang towards me and seized it forcibly from my hand,
before I could get it into my bosom, and sitting down began
to read aloud from it, in spite ol my protests against his seeing
my private meditations.

He made fun of some portions ; others he tore spitefully
from the book, saying as he did so, " that is a lie f"

I begged that he would return it without tearing it. But he
heeded nothing I said, either in defence of its truth, or of my
claim to it, as by his consent I had obtained it.

But instead, put it into his vest pocket, and walked off
with it.

This is the last I ever saw of this part of my asylum diary.
My journal covering this period is complete.

It may be gratifying to my readers to know how I preserved
my journal and private papers. The greatest part of my
asylum journal, up to this date, I secured by hiding it behind
a false lining in my band-box.

One day I found a piece of wall paper, and I clandestinely
sewed this into my band-box for a lining, behind which and
around the box I concealed my papers.

Some of them I hid between the black cloth and the board
8

170 MODERN PERSECUTION.

on the bottom of my satchel. I cut open the edge and scaled
it off with a case-knife, and after filling the pocket thus made,
I sewed it up, where they were kept undiscovered.

Some I placed between the millinet crown and the outside
covering of my traveling bonnet. I encircled this crown with
so many thicknesses of paper that it sometimes caused the
exclamation, " How heavy this bonnet is ! "

I never told until I got out of the asylum in what the
weight consisted !

The balance, accumulated after this date, which was the
largest part of the whole, passed through the Doctor's fingers
twice when in search of it, but he knew it not, as will be seen
in its proper place.

CHAPTER XXI.

The Modern Mode of Subjugating
Married Women.

Mrs. Sullivan, a sane woman, was put in here by her
drunken husband, on the plea of insanity. She was brought
handcuffed, and half of the hair pulled out of her head. 01
course the husband's testimony must be credited, for who
could desire more to protect a woman than he ?

Yes, Mr. Sullivan, the warm-hearted Irishman, showed his
regard for his wife in the same manner that Mr. Packard,
and many other husbands do, by legally committing her to
Dr. McFarland's protection, who, so far as my knowledge
extends, has never yet been true to this sacred trust.

This quick-tempered Irishman had a quarrel with his wife,
because she asserted her inalienable right to a pair of new
shoes, and he being the stronger of the two in physical force,
got her handcuffed, and pulled out the hair from half her
head with his own hand, and forced her in here as soon as
the " forms of law " could be gone through with.

And what could Mrs. Sullivan do in self-defence ?

All her representations would be listened to as the ravings
of a maniac !

"What is her testimony worth after the "forms of law"
have been gone through with, proving her insanity ?

Mrs. Sullivan is legally entered as an insane person, on
legal testimony; and now the Doctor is shielded in doing
what he pleases with her, for what is an insane person's
testimony worth ?

Nothing !

Thus shielded, he applies his instruments of torture to this
oppressed, bleeding heart, for the benevolent purpose of making

172 MODERN PERSECUTION.

her willing to return to her husband, and yield unanswering
obedience to this marital subjection !

Yes, his benevolent plan is at length achieved, and he soon
succeeds in making her so much more wretched and forlorn
than before, that her former woes and wrongs sink into obliv-
ion in comparison, and she begins to cry and beg to go home.

" Oh, take me back to my children and husband, and I will
bless you forever."

Now his patient is recovering ! Oh, what an astonishing
cure !

" How much that great Dr. McFarland knows more than
any other man, the secret of curing the insane wife ! "

But the cure must be sure and permanent, before her case
is represented as fit for removal. She has not yet performed
her share of unrequited labor for the State of Illinois, as its
slave ; and if she is a good and efficient workman, there may
be weeks, months, years of imprisonment yet before her, ere
her cure is complete !

Now the Doctor is the only competent one to report her
case to her friends or husband. No attendant's report can
be relied upon, much less the prisoner herself.

All communication is cut off, and the slave has naught to
do but to work and suffer in silent, mute submission to her
prison keepers. She dare not utter a complaint, lest the
tortures be again resumed. Her children may sicken and
die, but she must know nothing about them. Indeed, she
must be dead as to earth life, until her share of slave toil is
completed. And if very useful as a slave, she may possibly
get the diploma of " hopelessly insane " attached to her name
as an offset for these many years of slavery !

And then the friends solace themselves, that the very best
means of cure have been used, since none so skillful as the
learned Dr. McFarland can be found anywhere. And although
they deplore the fate of an all-wise Providence, yet, to Dr.

SUBJUGATING MARRIED WOMEN. £73

McFarland their heartfelt gratitude will be most signally due,
for the kind, humane treatment he bestowed upon her, by hav-
ing done all that human ingenuity could devise, to cure her !

A true and faithful picture of many a real case in this
Asylum.

But how did Mrs. Sullivan's case come out ?

After a time, the thought of her poor, defenceless, unpro-
tected children, with none but a drunken father to care for
them, pressed so fearfully upon her maternal sympathies, that
she ventured to plead to go back to them again.

But in vain !

No plea can compassionate the heart of her present pro-
tector. Her tears, her sighs, her entreaties, her arguments,
fall unheeded and apparently unheard upon his ear, for he
will not stop to hear a patient's story, however rational or con-
sistent— yea, the more rational the more unheeded, apparently.

She is then sent to- the wash-room or ironing-room, and
sewing-room, and compelled to work to drown her sorrow or
stifle its utterance.

But what if her children do need her services more than the
State ?

What does Dr. McFarland care for her children, or for the
fate of a mother who has been cast off by her husband ?

Nothing !

He cares for his own selfish interests, and nothing else. If
to his view his advantage is gained, he will send her home ;
if not, he will keep her at work for the State ; for the laws
of his own suggesting protect him from all harm, no matter
how much he harms the prisoners.

After months of faithful labor, he found the tide ot the
house was setting against him, by keeping this sane woman so
long from her family, and when he dared not resist this influ-
ence longer, he sent to her husband to take her home ; but he
would not come for her.

174 MODERN PERSECUTION.

And now comes one honorable act on the part of the Doc-
tor. He lent her money and sent her home alone.

A few days after, I ventured to congratulate the Doctor on
doing so noble a deed, adding :

" If what I have been told is true, you have represented her
in the discharge as one who has been falsely represented as
insane."

This creditable part of the representation he indignantly
denied, saying :

" No, she came here insane — was cured — and sent home ! "

" No, Dr. McFarland, she did not come here insane ; she
came here an abused woman — shamefully abused by a drunken
husband. She needed protection but not punishment, such
as you have bestowed upon her."

But no, the " lords of creation" must be protected ! or op-
pressed woman will rise and assert her rights, and man then
will fail to keep her down.

What will men do, when this Government protect the mar-
ried women in their right to themselves ?

Oh, when this great Woman Subjector, Dr. McFarland, is
exposed, where will these men send their wives to get them
" broke in ? " Oh ! where ?

I came here in defence of the same principle that Mrs. Sul-
livan did, with this difference ; she used her right of self-de-
fence in a different manner from what I did. She used physi-
cal force in resisting usurpation ; I did not.

I never did, nor never will quarrel with any one. I have
followed Christ's directions, " If thy brother smite thee on
the one cheek, turn to him the other also."

Mrs. Sullivan pursued a different mode of self-defence, but
the issue is just the same in both cases. Our husbands both
succeeded in getting us entered here on the plea of insanity,
and I, although so perfectly harmless in my mode of self-
defence, am required to stay three or four times her term of

SUBJUGATING MARRIED WOMEN. 175

imprisonment ! But, Oh, for woman's sake I suffer it. I will
try to continue to suffer on, patiently and uncomplainingly,
confidently hoping that my case will lead community to in-
vestigate for themselves, and see why it is, that so many sane
women are thus persecuted at this period of the Christian era.

The sad truth that man has fallen from his noble position
of woman's protector, and become her subjector, when appre-
hended, may lead our government to give protection to the
identity of the married woman, so that she can be as sure of
legal protection, where she does not receive the marital, as if
she were single. When, therefore, she needs legal protection
from marital usurpation, she can obtain it directly from her
government, as other citizens now can.

This period of subjection through which woman is passing,
is developing her self-reliant character, by compelling her to
defend herself, in order to secure the safety of her own soul.

That class of men who wish to rule woman, seem intent on
destroying her reason, to secure her subjection. If they can
not really put out this light in her, which so much annoys
them, they will credit this work as done, by falsely accusing
her of insanity, and when once branded by Dr. McFarland's
diploma of " hopelessly insane," they fondly think they can
keep her under their feet.

And this has actually been done in many instances, by the
help of the Illinois Insane Asylum.

Yes, the modern mode of subjugating married women, is,
to send her off to an insane asylum and get her publicly
branded as " hopelessly insane." Thus, instead of the hus-
band whipping his own wife with a " stick as large round as
his little finger," as the old common- law allowed him to do,
he sends her off to an insane asylum to get the officials of that
institution to whip her for him !

CHAPTER XXII. '

My Life Imperilled.

My life was almost daily and hourly endangered. For ex-
ample :

"I was one morning sitting in a side room by myself, for
the purpose of enjoying my secret devotions undisturbed,
which privilege the matron had kindly granted, as my own
dormitory had too many occupants to allow me any opportu-
nity of praying in secret, and being compelled, however, by
Dr. MeFarland's special order, to have the door of this closet
wide open, while I occupied it for this purpose, I was compelled
to submit to any such intruders as might chance to walk in.

Miss Jenny Haslett was one of the two maniacs who came
in this morning, and seated herself on a low stool at my feet.

I was always obliged to carry my chair and footstool with
me wherever I sat down, and by this arrangement I had my
asylum writing-table, my lap, always with me, and at these
times I made my entries into my journal and diary. The
other maniac sat on the floor under the window.

I quietly read my chapter, while Jenny amused herself play-
ing with the trimming on the front of my morning dress. I
closed my Bible, and resting my eyes upon her, reflected upon
the sad condition of this human wreck of existence before me.

She was a handsome delicate girl of eighteen years, who was
made insane by disappointed affection, and although generally
harmless, yet at times, liable to sudden frenzies, from causes
unknown. I could often hear her crying in the dead of night
for:

" Willie, oh ! my dear Willie ! do, do, come back to me —
oh ! Willie ! Willie ! I do love you ! "

It may be that I aroused some antagonistic feeling, and dis-

MY LIFE IMPERILLED. Uf

turbed some pleasant reverie of hers, when I bent forward and
with my hands parted the short hair which fell over her fine
forehead, and then bestowed upon it a gentle kiss of tender
pity.

In an instant the response came, in a blow from her
clenched fist upon my left temple, of such stunning force, that
for a moment I was lost to consciousness ; for the blow seemed
more like the kick of a horse, than the hand of a human
being. My spectacles were thrown across the room by the
blow, but I was not thrown from my seat.

As soon as I realized what had happened, I returned her
fiendish gaze with a look of pity, and exclaimed :

" Why Jenny, you have struck me!"

" Yes, and I am going to knock your brains out ! " said she,
with furious emphasis, and clenched fists.

Without speaking again, I quietly and calmly withdrew into
the hall, where I found my kind attendant, Miss Minerva
Tenny, whose quick perception read the tale, and without my
speaking a word, she exclaimed :

" Oh ! Mrs. Packard, what a wound you have got upon your
temple ! What has happened ? "

" Jenny has struck me. Please get me some cold water to
bathe it in."

" You will need something more than water, it is a terrible
blow ! I will go for Dr. Tenny."

After bringing me the water, she went for him, and he, like
a tender brother, came and pitied me, and while I rested my
throbbing head against his strong manly arm, I wept for joy
at the comfort his words of pity brought with them to my for-
saken heart.

" Dr. Tenny, can you protect my life ? "

" Mrs. Packard, I would protect you if I could, but, like you,
I am a subordinate — my power is limited."

" Will not the State be held responsible for these exposures

178 MODERN PERSECUTION.

of my life, to which Dr. McFarland subjects me ? I think
this appeal ought to be made."

Without answering this question he assured me he would
do all he could to help and protect me. And he did do so. I
think Dr. McFarland was restrained by his manly interfer-
ence. Still, the citadel of his heart was not reached either
by Dr. Tenny's or my son's appeals, to remove me to some
safer ward.

And never shall I forget the heartless response he made, as
the next day, when for the first time, he beheld my swollen
face and throbbing temples, as I lay in agony upon my bed,
from the effects of this injury, after I had told him all the cir-
cumstances, how I simply bestowed upon her forehead a loving
kiss as the only provocation, he simply remarked, as he turned
away :

"It is no uncommon thing to receive a blow for a kiss ! "
These were the only words either of sympathy or regret I
got from the Doctor, although the wound was then in such a
state of great inflammation that Mrs. McFarland expressed
herself :

" You may consider yourself fortunate, Mrs. Packard, if
you do not now lose your eye as the result."

For weeks I carried the marks of this blow, by a deep black
temple and eyes, so that a stranger would hardly have recog-
nized me during this period.

But instead of shielding me better after this, he not only let
Jenny remain in the ward, but he afterwards brought up Mrs.
Triplet from the Fifth ward, and from this time she, the most
dangerous patient in the whole female wards, was. seated by
my side at the table. I seldom seated myself at the table
after this, without hearing the threat from Mrs. Triplet :
" I shall kill you ! "

And I considered myself very fortunate if I left the table
without being spit upon by her, or by having her tea, or coffee,
or gravy, or sauce thrown upon my dress.

MY LIFE IMPERILLED. 179

At one time my right hand companion was suddenly
aroused to the attitude of self-defence, by having a knife
hurled at her temples or eyes, by one of our insane companions
opposite.

This aroused others to seize their knives and forks and
chairs, in self-defence, and there is no knowing what a scene
might have ensued, had not our attendants been on hand to
confine the infuriated ones.

There is no knowing at what instant these scenes may occur,
for I have often seen them, without the least apparent provo-
cation, suddenly seize the tumblers, salt cellars, plates, bowls,
and pitchers, and hurl them about in demoniacal frenzy, so
that the broken glass and china would fly about our face and
eyes like hail stones.

The defence which maniacs resort to, is, rendering evil for
evil, abuse for abuse, so that at the beginning of a scene among
twenty-five or thirty of them it is impossible to tell what the
end may be.

And yet this institution receives such, and puts them all
into one room, while the family plead that one is too dangerous
to trust in a family !

What would they think to have twenty-five in one family ?

For more than two years has Dr. McFarland imperilled my
life, by compelling me to occupy a ward among twenty-five of
this class, not knowing at what moment my life might be
taken away, or I receive some distressing injury.

Many times have I made the most touching appeals to him
to save my life ; but even before I could finish my sentence, he
would turn and walk indifferently away, without uttering one
syllable.

Once alone do I find recorded, that he deigned a reply,
which was under these circumstances.

Lena, a stage actress, who had become insane from a fall
through the stage platform, had been dragging me around the

180 MODERN PERSECUTION.

ward by the hair of my head, and unless the attendant had
been near to aid me, I might not have been able to extricate
myself from her grasp at all.

Lena had, like Jenny, always seemed pleased to have me
notice and caress her, as was my habit with them all who
would allow it, until this time, when she turned upon me and
treated me as I have described. After stating these facts, I
added :

" Now, Doctor, I think a sane person is more in danger than
the maniacs, for they will fight back, while I will not."

" Supposing," said he, "a person should enter your room
with a loaded pistol and aim it at you, and you had one near
which, by your using first, could save your own life, would you
not shoot to save yourself? "

" No, Doctor, I would not ; because my nature does not
prompt me to defend myself in this manner. I have such an
instinctive dread of taking the life of another, that I would
rather die myself than kill another."

" I should, and I think every one would do the same in self-
defence."

" I presume you would, and so would most men, for they
were made to be the protectors and defenders of the weaker
sex, and the man who would not do it in defence of a defence-
less woman, is less than a man."

However, I could not convince the Superintendent that he
was under any obligation to defend my life, and unless I had
strength and courage enough to defend it my sell, I must die ;
for so far as convincing him that he had any responsibility
about the case, it was impossible to make him comprehend it.

In view of such facts I should not be at all surprised, if,
when the thoughts of the heart are revealed, it will then be
manifest that he placed my life thus in jeopardy among mani-
acs, hoping they might kill me ! !

CHAPTER XXm.

Self-defence. — Clandestine Letters.

The oppressor's guilt renders him peculiarly sensitive to any
action on the part of the injured one, by way of self-defence.

Therefore, in order to practice this duty, we are always
compelled to use what some would regard as unjustifiable
means. And yet, in exchange of circumstances, these com-
plainers would feel no scruple in doing the same thing of
which they complain.

Here I am literally entombed alive by fraudulent means,
for a wicked purpose. The walls of my sepulcher are the
walls of this asylum. I am allowed no communication with
the outside world. No one inside these walls can aid me in
doing so, without proving recreant to his trust as an employee.
And no visitor is allowed to take out a letter from a patient
in a public institution, without the Superintendent's knowl-
edge or consent.

Now what shall I do ?

Shall I quietly submit to these unjust laws, framed for the
very purpose of perpetuating an absolute despotism ?

I am a law defender ; I do not like to be a law breaker,
and God is never compelled to violate law to bring about His
purposes, neither does He allow us to transgress any moral
or natural law, to accomplish our own purposes, however
desirable.

When we see no way of getting out of a sad dilemma,
except that of wrong doing, we are directed to " Wait, wait
on the Lord," that is, wait until Providence opens a way for
us. As the traveler, in pursuing his onward course, coming
in contact with the moving train, has nothing to do but to
stop and wait until it passes by ; so Providence clears His
track without any law being broken.

182 MODERN PERSECUTION.

Therefore, however desirable it may seem to me, to be free
to care for, and communicate with my precious children, yet,
although this vision tarries long, I must wait until the train,
however long, passes by, before I can possibly behold this
prospect.

Again, I must not murmur nor complain, although x am
most keenly sensitive to the humiliation of my circumstances.
But I will not bow down to wickedness. I do as well as
I know how, and will continue to do so, knowing that im-
possibilities are not required of me by my righteous Judge,
for I know that every good act is an investment in the bank
of faith, and its dividends never fall short.

I believe, too, that God requires me not only to pray that
wrong doing be stopped, but also to act in concert with this
prayer, and the wrong doing, wnich it is my duty to stop, are
the sins against myself. I must begin at home, being unable
to defend others until I can defend myself ; for how can a
mother defend her children, unless she can defend herself?

I must defend myself not only for their sake, but also for
the sake of society where I belong.

I have already tried the force of argument, reason, and
entreaty, to induce Dr. McFarland to allow me some chance
for self-defence, but all in vain.

I cannot get his consent in this matter, therefore, the act
being right in itself, and a duty also, I must act not only
without his consent, but without his knowledge. Therefore,
under the circumstances, a clandestine act of self-defence is
not a sinful act because of its secrecy.

But to whom shall I apply ? And how ? are the next
questions to be settled.

I will first appeal to the Trustees, as they are the power to
whom my earthly destiny is now committed, and they have the
first right to superintend Dr. McFarland's actions, in regard to
the prisoners under his charge ; and I feel morally bound to try

CLANDESTINE LETTERS. 183

to get the Trustees to compel their Superintendent to act
justly towards me.

Under the influence of such feelings I wrote the subjoined
letter to the Trustees, on a piece of tissue paper, which when
folded compactly, occupied a space no larger than a silver
quarter. I knew they were to hold a session at the asylum
in March next, 1861, and it was to be my business to get this
letter to them at this meeting. But here was the difficulty.

Since hiding me among the maniacs, the-Doctor had evinced
a peculiar sensitiveness at my being seen there, which was
never manifested while I was an occupant of the seventh
ward. And he had even led the Trustees past this ward,
without even allowing them to enter it, since he had con-
signed me to it. Now how could I give them my letter,
either openly or secretly ? No employee would do it for me,
lest Dr. MeFarland's displeasure be incurred, and then, of
course, a " discharge " awaited them.

Still watching and praying constantly, while they were in
the house, I carried my little note in my pocket, hoping by
some good fortune, I might yet get it into their hands.

At length my name was announced as wanted in the
dining-room. I gladly responded to the call, where I found
Mrs. McFarland and Mrs. Miner waiting to receive me to
hold an interview with me.

Finding it too dangerous to take my callers into the hall
which I now occupied, I was then allowed the exposure of my
own life to be suspended long enough to entertain them in
the dining-room.

Happy beyond measure to find myself in the presence of a
trustee's wife, my whole mental powers were centered upon
knowing how to employ her as the confidential medium of my
letter to the Trustees. But the fact was self-evident to me,
that Mrs. McFarland had come as a spy upon me, lest I should,
in some manner, either by word or look or letter, communicate

184 MODERN PERSECUTION,

to her some intimation of the injustice I was experiencing at
her husband's hands.

And so complete was the espionage she exercised, that I
began to fear that this hope must expire in its bud. When
they arose to leave, and as Mrs. McFarland's back was towards
us as she opened the dining-room door, I watched my chance
and buried this little note in the palm of Mrs. Miner's hand,
and closing her hand upon it, I gave it a significant pressure,
as much as to say :

" Don't betray me — but do your duty."

And at the same time kissing her, so that the transfer
seemed a perfect and satisfactory success ; that is, I felt sure
she understood my meaning, and was willing to aid me in
doing anything right and consistent.

Of course, she could and would read the open note before
assuming any further responsibility. And from the impression
I received of her feelings, I was satisfied that she would do
right about it. But whether I then misjudged her, I cannot
tell, or whether her husband kept the letter himself, or com-
municated it to the Trustees, I know not. But this I do
know, I never heard from the note, or from its influence.

That seed, though thus buried for eleven long years, now rises
to a tangible influence, and by its mute appeal to the law-
makers who read this letter, it may lead them to see the neces-
sity of demanding fidelity in their public officers, to whom
they have entrusted the sacred right of their personal liberty.

To the Trustees of Jacksonville Insane Asylum, in session at
their March meeting, 1861 :

Gentlemen: — Here under your inspection, a Christian
mother, and an Illinois citizen, has been imprisoned nearly
nine months for simply exercising the God-given rights of
opinion and conscience ; and this, too, in only a lady-like
and Christian manner. Nothing else !

CLANDESTINE LETTERS. 185

Now, can you be guiltless and let this persecution go on
under your jurisdiction ?

Do remember, and be" warned by God's unchangeable law,
viz : " With what measure ye mete withal, it shall be measured
to you again."

Do allow me to live a natural life in America, so long as my
own actions allow me a claim to my own freedom. Do deliver
me out of the hands of Dr. McFarland, for he has claimed to
be better than God to me, in that he says to me that his judg-
ment is a safer guide for me than my own conscience !

And yet I am in the absolute power of such a man. Do, I
beg of you, deliver me from this fear of evil !

Do but give me the opportunity, and I will give you my
pledge, if necessary, that America need no longer be burdened
with me, as a citizen, than until I can get under the protection
of the English crown, where I can hope to enjoy my rights of
opinion and conscience unmolested.

0 ! America ! My country, when will you erase the stigma
you now carry, of having imprisoned an unprotected minister's
wife, for simply obeying God, by trying to live a life of practi-
cal godliness ?

Shall a woman of America, when she consents to become a
wife, and to her sorrow finds that the man whom she chose to
be her protector, has instead, become the subjector of her
womanly rights, be compelled to leave her offspring mother-
less, and be entombed alive, in an Insane Asylum, simply oe-
cause there is no power in the laws of the land to protect her
against the despotic will of her husband ?

When will my countrymen fear God, more than they do
the oppressor ?

Gentlemen, action, investigation, is demanded of you, by
"this appeal, in order that your souls maybe found guiltless in this
matter. Dare to do your duty, and God will bless you.

Your Suffering Sister, E. P. W. Packard

186 MODERN PERSECUTION.

After receiving the above letter, I think a failure to inves-
tigate into the merits of the case was in itself a criminal act.
Ignorance of the state of my mental faculties could no longer
shield them, for the letter contains a sufficient degree of intel-
ligence to arouse an investigation to see if what I claimed was
true or false.

But merely " doing not" did not extenuate their guilt, for
the perpetuating of a wrong. It enhanced it ; for the post-
ponement of a difficult crisis only renders a settlement more
difficult, and the evil consequences more inevitable and un-
avoidably certain.

Guilt was daily accumulating by each added day of most
wearisome imprisonment, and that tender babe was being thus
deprived of its right to its mother's care, and. that little flock
of tender lambs were daily and hourly in suffering need of a
mother's care and sympathy.

Yes, the quicker the settlement, the easier and the better,
both for them and the injured victims of this most cruel con-
spiracy.

Now, they cannot clear themselves of guilt, if, Pilate like,
they do try to throw the responsibility off themselves upon Dr.
McFarland. For they know that for his act they will be held
justly responsible, in the same sense that the Superintendent is
held responsible for the acts of his employees.

For my aggravated and enhanced sufferings from this time, I
hold the Trustees responsible ; for it seemed that the Doctor's
story was heeded and mine rejected, thus delegating an in-
creased power to the Doctor to abuse me, just as his uphold-
ing Lizzy Bonner in her barbarities, only enhanced her power
to harm still more.

Indeed, I suffered so much from his tyranny, for nine months
from this time, that even the sight of the man, or the sound
or sight of his name, was instinctively and inseparably associ-
ated with horror in my mind.

CLANDESTINE LETTERS. 187

But the details of this period of purgatorial mental anguish,
as I find it delineated in my journal, it will be impossible for
me to give within the limits of this volume. I did propose
when I projected the plan of this book, to give the history of
these wrongs in detail to the world ; but I shrink from the
task.

The record of the adamantine pen God himself will give in
his own way and time in complete detail. This record can
never be obliterated, except by repentance on Dr. McFarland's
part for the wrongs I have suffered at his hands.

I am determined, by God's help, now to write my own his-
tory in chapters indelible and indestructible in my own honest
deeds.

The following letter to Dr. Shirley, of Jacksonville, written
during these days of anguish, on some cloth, or tissue tea-
paper which I obtained from the sewing-room, I handed to Dr.
Sturtevant after chapel service in a manner similar to what I
did my note to Mrs. Miner, except that I confined my saluta-
tion to a shake of his hand as I slipped the note into it.

But I am sorry to say I have more reason to think he be-
trayed me to the Doctor, than I have that Mrs. Miner did, for
the Doctor told me himself that he had destroyed a " worthless
letter" Dr. Sturtevant had given him from me.

I doubt not he spoke a truth in making that confession to
me, and I think it was uttered under the influence of an exul-
tant feeling which said :

" So you see, Mrs. Packard, I can head you anywhere ! You
are my helpless victim."

" Never mind, Dr. McFarland, you did then hold me, and
the letter too, in your power, but now I hold that letter in my
power, to publish to the world, that my readers may see in
what its " worthlessness" consisted ; and I now hold myself
and you too, where the verdict of public sentiment will compel
us both to stand just where our own actions will place us."

188 MODERN PERSECUTION.

And Dr. Shirley can also see in what estimate I then held
him. This opinion I based upon an interview I had with him
in the Doctor's parlor, in company with Mr. and Mrs. Blessing,
and as I was personally acquainted with no other man in
Jacksonville, of course, made application to him as a dernier
resort.

Insane Asylum, March 20, 1861.

Dr. Shirley — Kind Sir : Constrained by the law of self-
preservation, I feel compelled to make an appeal to your
humanity for help. Yes, help for me, a helpless victim of
severe persecution.

I am sick, and need some human helper, for on the side of
my oppressors there is power ; yes, power to harm too, yet I
have no protection save Omnipotence.

My heart turns instinctively .to you, kind Sir, hoping and
trusting that the God-like principle of manhood has not be-
come extinct in you, and therefore, I have a foundation on
which to make my appeal.

Dr. Shirley, I am indeed an injured woman, and my case
ought to arouse and command an investigation ; at least, so
far as to grant me some kind of trial, before perpetuating my
imprisonment any longer. Can you not do something to secure

me one ?

I do beg and entreat, with all the power of woman's elo-
quence, that you do deliver me out of Dr. McFarland's hands.

He is my oppressor, my unjust and cruel persecutor. He
claims that " his judgment is a safer guide for me than my
conscience."

These are his own words ; and I am in the absolute power
of such a man.

What protection have I under a man who ignores the con-
science of his victim? Do deliver me from this fear of evil,
and my soul shall bless you ierever.

And I have given this usurper my written pledge, that I

CLANDESTINE LETTERS. 189

shall expose him to the world whenever I get out, unless he
repents of his inhumanities to the patients. And he knows,
too, that I am a truthful woman, and can never break this
pledge.

Ask wisdom — do your duty — and do not yield to the temp
tation to fear to cope with the great Dr. McFarland in defence
of the injured. Omnipotence will shield you in doing your
duty. My heart is full, but by means of communication are
entirely cut off, so far as the Doctor can prevent it.

If possible, come to me, and I will tell you what I cannot,
and dare not write. Do let a God-fearing humanity, not a
man-fearing despotism, control your actions, and I trust
Heaven will protect you.

In the name of justice, humanity, and of the State, I have
requested a meeting of the trustees on my account.

But Dr. McFarland' s reply leaves me nothing to hope for in
that direction.

Still, duties are mine, and events God's.

I know my life is worth preserving, for the sake of my six
children, if for no other purpose, and " For me to live is
Christ, and to die, gain." Still all lawful means I feel bound to
use, to preserve life, and then I can say, God's will be done.
Your humble, earnest petitioner,

E. P. W. Packard.

Insane Asylum, May 10, 1862.

To the Trustees. — G-entlemen: Dr. McFarland has in-
formed me that the State, not my husband, supports me here.

I deem it my duty to protest against this act of injustice.

Although I fully appreciate your intended kindness to me
and mine, by placing me on the charity list ; yet it is the in-
justice of the act against which my nature instinctively revolts.

My children have no claim upon the charities of this State
for their education. God has provided them with ways and

190 MODERN PERSECUTION.

means of being educated far superior to many children of the
poor tax payers.

If these indigent tax payers choose, voluntarily to deprive
their own children of the means of education, for the benefit
of my more favored ones, there would be no injustice in my
receiving their gifts in this way.

But to claim it of them, without their consent or knowledge,
simply as a legal right, is unjust ; for it plainly conflicts with
the dictates of the moral law,- which is, doing to others as I
would wish them to do to me.

I am not required to love my neighbor's interests better than
my own. My own children have a prior claim to my regard
than my neighbor's. Still I have no right to seek their inter-
ests at my neighbor's expense, without his knowledge or con-
sent.

Since my husband has broken his marriage covenant, and
failed to protect me in my duties as a wife and mother, de-
priving me not only of my marriage rights, but also of all my
rights as an American citizen, thereby depriving his children
of their natural guardian and instructor, I feel that he has no
right to seek to make pecuniary profits from the specious plea
thus formed for educating his children.

You know not what you are doing, in supporting this man
in his wicked plan of wronging the innocent without cause.
God grant that your eyes may be opened to see your guilt in
thus doing, so that you may repent this life, where you can be
forgiven, on the ground of making due restitution for the
multiplied wrongs you have inflicted upon me and mine.
Respectfully yours,

Mrs. E. P. W. Packard.

CHAPTER XXIV.

"You Should Return to Your Husband."

One day in my extreme distress, and finding every refuge
for deliverance failing me, in a state of desperation almost, I
concluded as a dernier resort, to make one direct appeal to the
doctor himself, as a professed follower of Christ, in the Pres-
byterian Church, hoping even against hope, that some sort of
relief might possibly reach me through this avenue.

When, therefore, he called at my room, I said to him, " Doc-
tor, I am suffering a temptation from the powers of darkness
to swerve from my purpose of holy obedience to God's revealed
will. Is there no help for me in my deep affliction ? "

" What do you mean by your temptation ? "

" I feel tempted to complain of my lot, and to impatiently
wish to be delivered out of the power of my persecutors.
Doctor, I do so want my freedom ! But 1 am not tempted to
desire it at the expense of my conscience, that is, I am not
tempted in the least by a desire to return to my husband, nor
could any influence tempt me to do this deed, since for me it
would be a sin against God to do so."

" Well, what can I do for you ? "

" Do right ; by letting me have my liberty to support myself
as other wives do who cannot live with their husbands."

" The only right course for you is to return to your husband
and do as a true woman should do ; be to him a true and lov-
ing wife, as you promised to be by your marriage vow, unto
death, and until you do consent to do so, there is no prospect
of your getting out of this place ! For until you will give up
this insane, unreasonable notion of your duty forbidding it, I
consider this institution the proper place for you to spend your
days in, for you must be maintained somewhere, by charity, if

192 MODERN P ERSE CUTION .

it is not true, as you pretend, that you have helpers outside
who promise you pecuniary aid, but give neither you nor me
a guarantee to that effect."

" I do not feel that I am an object of charity so long as I
have health and abilities to render me self-reliant ; although I
know my situation is a very unpleasant one for a woman, re-
ported to be lost to reason, to contend with. For who will
desire or employ an insane person as housekeeper, cook, nurse
or teacher ; still I could try, and if I did not succeed I could
drop into a poor-house, such as the laws of the State provide
for the indigent to die in."

" What poor-house ? "

" Jacksonville, if I could get no further."

"No, you have no claim there."

" Manteno, then."

" No, you are not a woman who can be trusted, for your
own conduct here has proved you to be entirely unworthy of
trust or confidence. You have abused the trust I have re-
posed in you, and betrayed me in every possible way by mis-
representation and abuse. You have proved to me that you
are all that your husband represents you to be, that he is an in-
jured and abused man, and you are a worthless woman, for it
is impossible for your husband to be such a man as you re-
present him to be and sustain the spotless character, as a
minister, which he does and always has."

" Don't I know, Doctor, a little more of his private charac-
ter, as a husband, than any other one ? and is it not possible
for one to assume a false character abroad ? Has not the fall
of many good man, reported above censure, proved that it is
sometimes the case ? "

" No, I think it is impossible for your account of him to oe
a true one, and I regard this institution as the only fit place
for you, so long as you are not willing to return to him."

" Is it right, here in America to coerce a woman's conscience,

Not Alienated.

" See! That lady is not alienated from her husband! See how kindly she takes his
arm! " See page 84

No. 1. — Mr. Packard taking leave No. 2. — Mr. Packard throwing kiss-

of Dr. McFnrland! See pnge 86. es to his wife! See page 87

"RETURN TO YOUR HUSBAND." 193

compelling her to do what she believes to be wrong ? My
views of my personal duty are the rule for me, as your views
are for you. I regard it as persecuting Christianity thus to
treat me, and that the cloak of insanity is the only legalized
popular mode of doing it at the present day."

" No, Mrs. Packard, you are talking unreasonably, in an
insane manner, and all reasonable people will call it so, for
you to so represent duty ; and so long as you hold on to these
views, there is no hope for a change that I can see."

"Now I understand you. Now I am satisfied — for the
reality, however painful, is far less unbearable than suspense.
I now know what Mrs. Hosmer told me is true, although I
was loth to believe you were so entirely lost to justice and
honor. She said there was no hope of my getting out of this
institution so long as you superintended it." -

" Did Mrs. Hosmer say so ? "

" She did."

He then tried to qualify what he had said. He did not
seem to like to have me cherish that view exactly, but how he
meant to qualify it I could not understand.

I know that the utterance of simple unqualified truth is the
hardest language which can be employed. But on this simple
weapon of naked truth I intend to rely for my own defence
and protection. The world may credit or discredit my state- '
ments, just as they please ; my responsibility is done with the
utterance of the simple truth.

The superintendence of another's conscience is not my
work. God forbid that I ever put forth my hand, Uzzah like,
to steady the conscience of another, since I know that God
alone claims the right to protect his own sacred ark. I in-
tend no man or woman shall ever steady my own. This is
God's exclusive work.

My journal, two weeks after, says :

" 1 have been in bed for a few days to rest my brain by sleep
9

194 MODERN PERSECUTION,

and sitz-baths. The means have been blessed and I am better.
For about two weeks I have been afflicted with a headache
most of the time.

This is something new for me. I scarcely ever had a head-
ache in all my life. Indeed I hardly know what pain of body
is, I am so blessed with such sound and vigorous health. But
when the doctor told me I must return to my husband or die
here, it cost me a mental struggle which has prostrated me
upon this sick bed.

It is these spiritual wrongs which cause woman so much
feeble health, and break down the strongest constitutions.

Knowing this, I must try to fortify nature in every possible
manner within my reach, so that the citadel of my health need
not suffer detriment ; for if that should fail, I fear my courage
would fail with it.

The degree of faith, trust and confidence I am able to sum-
mon into this field of action, depends much upon the health-
ful vigor and nervous energy I can command. Therefore to
keep my faith strong, I must keep my health good."

CHAPTER XXV.

Miss Mary Tomlin — A Model Attendant.

I never saw Miss Mary Tomlin abuse a patient, and she was
my attendant for nearly one year.

She^ unlike most attendants, did not seem to become
callous and indifferent towards them, because she would not
allow herself to do the first unkind act.

It is very noticeable here that the beginning of wrong doing
is like the letting out of water, over the edge of a fountain.
When the first few drops have trickled over, there is apt to be
a few more, and a few more, until a deep and broad channel
is soon formed through which the waters of human kindness
are allowed to pass into a state of annihilation.

When this groove was once made, it was never closed up
under the Asylum influence.

The only security an employee or boarder could have of
maintaining their integrity, lay in their not doing the first
wrong act. This was the secret of her triumph over the con-
tagion of that most corrupt house.

She was entered in my ward, and although initiated under
our most unexemplary attendant, Mrs. De La Hay, she seemed
to have moral courage enough to allow her own principles to
control her.

Miss Tomlin exercised the utmost forbearance and kind en-,
durance of the patient's weakness and frailties, such as I
think was never surpassed by any attendant. She may justly
be called a model attendant, so far as the treatment of the pa^
tients was concerned. Should asylums secure such, and only
such attendants, they might justly be called asylums, so far
as the attendants' duties are concerned.

I never feared for the fate of a patient when Miss Tomlin

196 MODERN PERSECUTION.

was in sight ; even Miss Bonner's fierce spirit seemed subdued
by her silent, gentle, but irresistible magnetism of kindness
and tenderness.

I recollect once how I pitied her when she called me to see
the condition of Miss Sallie Low, a filthy patient, occupying a
screen-room at the time, while passing through one of her
" spells" of excessive fury, where she had divested herself of
all her clothing, and was standing nude when I saw her, with
her hands both raised, with all her fingers spread, with her
mouth wide open in laughter, and her large black eyes show-
ing the white on the upper side in wildness — her short, heavy,
curly black hair standing all about her head in bristles, from
the salve with which she had anointed both it and herself com-
pletely over, so that her flesh was about the color of a monkey.

Besides, she had written her marks upon the wall, as high
as her fingers could reach. My kind attendant instead of
being angry at her exulting patient, in view of the labor she
had caused in cleaning her and her room, only laughed in re-
turn, as she exclaimed :

" Did you ever see a human being so much resemble a mon-
key!"

With the help of another attendant she took her to the bath-
room, and after patiently soaking her for a while in the bath-
tub of warm water, she finally cleaned and dressed her, and
introduced her into our dormitory as a woman who deserved
our pity, instead of our censure, for —

" She is not to blame for causing me this trouble, and this
is what I came here to do, to take care of those who cannot
take care of themselves."

" Even her bath was administered in such a gentle manner
that Miss Low, instead of offering resistance, enjoyed the fun
first-rate and came from it refreshed and invigorated, instead
of being exhausted from death struggles such as Miss Bonner
and such like attendants administered.

A MODEL ATTENDANT. 197

In contrast to Miss Tomlin's method of administering the
bath, I will here give Mrs. J. C. Coe's* description of one
which Miss Jane Smith gave Mrs. Commonsforth, as a speci-
men of what is common there. She says :

"Even modesty as well as sympathy and all the other
Christian virtues are punished as insanity. For example,
Mrs. Commonsforth, who had so far recovered her natural
state as to feel a reluctance at being stripped naked in the
presence of her attendant, Miss Jane Smith, ventured to ask
her to let her take her bath alone.

" But instead of gratifying her, she became enraged at this
request of her patient, and not only denied her wish, but com-
menced immediately to use violence in stripping her, and even
got her down upon her back upon the floor, and literally tore
her clothes from off her, with her own hands.

" Then, as if to punish her for trying to resist this brute
force, she made the bath scalding hot, and forced her into it
and held her down under the water with the back of her neck
over where the hot water came bubbling up, so that it was
literally scalded so deep as to leave a raw sore for weeks after-
wards.

"And, as if to punish her for feeling pain by this applica-
tion of scalding water, she ordered her to go naked to a screen-
room where she locked her in and kept her in that condition
in the depth of winter for more than a whole day, without a
mouthful of food to eat and nothing to wrap about her body
except a piece of an old comfort.

" The next day as Dr. McFarland came round on his daily
visits, she heard Miss Smith say to him:

4 " Mrs. Commonsforth has had a very exciting time, and
has torn all her clothes from off her, so she has nothing to
wear, and therefore I keep her locked up ! "

" The Doctor believes the statements of his attendants and

* The Cook's Wife.

198 MODERN PERSECUTION .

without question or investigation acts upon them. Of course,
he would not look in upon a naked woman and thus her scalds
would escape his notice. When Mrs. Commonsforth after-
wards was telling me these facts, I asked her :

" ' Why did you not halloo to the Doctor and tell him she
was lying about you ? '

" ' If I did, I knewl should have to suffer for it when he
was out of hearing, and the Doctor would not be likely to take
any notice of what I said.' "

It does seem as if the State ought to attach a penalty to this
perversion of the bath-tub in this prison house. Only let the
law-makers take but one bath here, under the hands of these
furies, and I think they would vote for some penalty to their
tormentors.

Miss Tomlin told me of one act of her's which reflects much
credit upon her moral courage and integrity. On Sunday
morning the Doctor ordered Miss Goodrich from off her bed,
as he passed through, and when out of hearing, Miss Tomlin
ordered her back again, for she felt that she knew better than
he did what her health demanded.

She said she had concluded to pursue this independent
course, without talking much about it, hoping thus to evade
the rule without opposition. If she was complained of, she
said, she would then give her reasons, and she thought any
intelligent person would be satisfied.

I assured her this was the right course : still, I was sure it
would awaken decided opposition, for the more reasonable, the
more virulent the opposition it would arouse.

And so it proved. Instead of promoting her, as she de-
served to be, they willingly allowed her to resign her trusts to
others far less fitted to honor them. And in defence of this
course, I heard one of the authorities say :

" Miss Tomlin is insane, in some respects, like Mrs. Pack-
ard!"

A MODEL ATTENDANT. 199

Her insanity, like my own, consisted in her immovable de-
fence of the principles of uniform kindness to the unfortunate.

Another most kind and faithful employee, Mrs. Hosmer, was
accused of this same charge of insanity, for the same reason.
Indeed, one of these authorities remarked :

" If we could but get Mrs. Hosmer into the wards as a
patient, we would treat her as we do the maniacs ! "

This is doubtless true, for her persistent regard for the
patients' interests, was a constant reproof to their own in-
difference, and aroused the same antagonistic feelings towards
her, which my course has elicited towards me ; and the posi-
tion of a patient here affords a noble opportunity for seeking
their revenge in full measure.

I will close this chapter by inserting here a beautiful para-
phrase on a passage in Psalms, which Miss Tomlin wrote her-
self, and handed me for my solace.

" I shall be satisfied when I awake in thy likeness."

In this dreary vale of sorrow,

Oft my heart is sick and sore,
Waiting- for a brighter morrow,

Waiting, waiting evermore.

Hope deferred my heart is breaking,

And I long to be at rest —
Aye ! the sleep that knows no waking,

Would be welcome to this breast.

Did I say, " that knows no waking 1 "

Nay, I would not have it so,
Better far to bear this aching,

Than to sleep forevermore.

But I would awake like Jesus —

Like unto the crucified —
When I'm fashioned in His image,

Then shall I be satisfied.

Affectionately your friend, M. Tomlin.

CHAPTER XXVI.

Mrs. MeFarland— The Matron.

It is due Mrs. MeFarland to say, that after I gave my writ-
ten reproof to her husband, she seemed to be induced by its
influence, to see the debased condition the prisoners were in,
and expressed this feeling in these words :

" Mrs. Packard, I never realized, until I read your Reproof,
what a condition we were in. It has led me to determine to
do what I can to reform some of the many evils which I can
now see do exist here. We had so insensibly sunk into this
condition, that we did not realize it until you showed it to us
in your Reproof."

To Mrs. MeFarland' s credit it should be stated, that she did
try to alleviate the dreadful condition of the patients as much
as possible.

After Mrs. Waldo left, she became matron,- and filled this
office as well as she was capacitated for. Her kind and gen-
erous sympathies rendered her a general favorite amongst the
patients, and atoned greatly for the undeveloped woman in
some other respects. She sympathized with me in many
ways, and tried to favor me, even in defiance of her husband's
known wishes to the contrary.

One day the Doctor found a carpet upon my floor, and as
he stood upon the threshold of my room, looking at it for the
first time, he exclaimed :

" Who has been putting a carpet on Mrs. Packard's room ? "

My attendant, Miss Tomlin, standing by, replied in her very
mild tone :

" I believe it is your wife's work."

He said nothing more, but the carpet remained on the floor
until I left.

THE MATRON. 201

It was through her influence that I was allowed to have a
room by myself, after one year's confinement to the dormitory.
I had sent a written request to the Doctor to let me have a
wash bowl and pitcher, but he did not notice it so much as
to refuse it.

But Mrs. McFarland contrived to get one, and gave me,
also, a nice curtain for my window, and a chair for my
room — a great, but rare privilege in the Eighth ward.

There was one time that the Doctor tried to so torment my
feelings, that I felt self-defence required me to withdraw
all communication of thought with him, to save them.
Therefore, for months, I would not speak to him, not even so
much as to answer the most common question. Mrs. McFarland
approved of this course, by saying to me :

" Well, Mrs. Packard, I would not speak to him if I were in
your place. If a man treated me as he has you, I would let
him alone."

And she told my attendants not to treat me as they did the
other patients.

I will here give an extract from a letter I wrote to her about
April 30, 1862 ; " Mrs. McFarland, I have almost unbounded
confidence in your womanly nature ; I believe its instincts are

safe guide in dictating your duty so far as it goes ; yet, I do
Lot regard your judgment as so mature, that experience may
iot improve it.

Will you therefore allow me to make a suggestion, when I
assure you it is made with the purest motives, and the kindest
feelings. I am prompted to do this, from the assurance I feel
that you will allow the suggestion all the influence which
truth, reason and common sense, urge in its support." * * *

With regard to the suggestion I then made, together with
many others, I will only say that Mrs. McFarland almost
ilways heeded them, and often consulted me, in relation to
her family matters and the interests of the institution.
9*

202 MODERN PERSECUTION.

The reform thus inaugurated, through her agency, led to
the expression often made during these better days of prison
life:

" This house is a paradise compared with what it has been."

Dr. McFarland seemed to be the last and the hardest one to
move in this direction; but satisfied he could not stop the
wheel of revolution by opposing it, he after a while, allowed
himself to simply hang as a dead weight upon it, until the
aristocratic ladies from Jacksonville insulted and ridiculed me
in my room, when all at once a new spirit seemed to hold him,
for a time, to be our co-worker, instead of an antagonist.

There seemed to be something in his wife's increasing
popularity which convinced him that it would not be policy to
oppose her openly, for if he did, she told me she should do as I
had done, " appeal to the Trustees " to sustain her !

Finally, from the influence of the outside pressure in favor
of reform, the Doctor himself thanked me for giving him the
reproof, and freely acknowledged that I intended it for his
good.

Through Mrs. McFarland, as the principal agent of this re-
form, the tide of popular influence seemed to undergo an entire
change. Instead of its being popular to abuse the patients, it
became more popular to treat them with respect and even
kindness. And finally, by a change of some bad attendants
for good ones, I began to feel that the evils were becoming
greatly lessened.

And so it did appear for awhile. But I was everywhere
told:

" There will be a relapse if you ever leave this house, for the
Doctor is afraid of you, as the only reason why he is making
this spasmodic attempt to co-operate with his wife."

From the Committee's report, and that of my personal
friends I left in the Asylum, I have too much reason to fear
that so it proved. My friends have assured me that the " reign

THE MATRON. 203

of terror " commenced anew when I left, so that abuse and
cruelty again became the rule of the house, to a greater degree
even than ever before.

Now I am fully convinced that this temporary reform, so far
as Dr. McFarland was concerned, was merely the effect of policy,
rather than principle — that he assumed this appearance merely
to satisfy me he had repented, so that I might be induced to
represent him to the public as worthy of confidence, on that
ground ; for he knew full well, that my conscience would not
allow me to expose a penitent man's sins, however great the
magnitude ol his previous guilt.

I find, therefore, in my journal, from the time I began to
hope he was treating the patients on the principles of justice,
I have been exceedingly careful not to " Break the bruised
reed, or quench the smoking flax;" that is, I encouraged every
hopeful manifestation to the highest and fullest extent, consis-
tency and truth would permit.

Many blamed me on this ground, that I was too charitable
to the poor sinner ; but dictated as I was by the promptings
of my own forgiving nature, I was thus inclined to cover more
sins with this mantle of charity, than some would have thought
proper or allowable.

I never can find it in my heart to blame, where there is the
least possible chance for encouragement. I aim to" Overcome
evil with good," instead of attacking evil with evil, where
there is any possible opportunity of doing so.

But there are cases where it is a mercy to be just to the sin-
ner. Nothing but ruin will save them from ruin. That is,
they never will repent until they are first punished ; and the
just punishment, which I tried so long and effectually to have
him ward off, was the public exposure of his hidden iniquities.
But persistency in his sins, has forced me to do, what for a
time, I hoped I could be excused from doing.

CHAPTER XXVII.

The Sane kept for the Doctor's Benefit.

The remark Miss C. L. English, a good attendant, from
Chandlerville, Cass Co., 111., made, conveys an important truth
which the tax payers ought to know — viz :

" It is plainly to be seen, the Doctor keeps sane people here
from choice, to serve his private interests, knowing that the un-
requited labor he gets out of them he can turn to his aggran-
dizement— in his report of the finances of the institution."

Yes, all this slave labor turns to his advantage as he reports
it, thus buying their patronage, as it were, to secure his salary.
This salary is thus earned for him by his slaves. His own ac-
tion, or rather his inaction, shows that he is almost totally
indifferent to the. interests of his prisoners, only so far as his
interests can be promoted by an assumed regard for theirs. He
does not seem to care how many hearts he breaks with anguish,
nor how many choice spirits he crushes into annihilation, if
he can only rise on their downfall.

The faithful hard working Kate has well earned her two or
three dollars a week, if any female attendant earns that
amount by her work. She has been as sane a worker as any
attendant in the house ever since I knew her, and I am told
she had been just as competent and useful for many months
before. And Kate is only one of scores of others of like type.

And if they are ever discharged after these years of unre-
quited labor either their friends or the county will be required
to pay the institution, in addition to all this unrequited toil,
all that their clothing has cost them, beside the bill charged
for making it, even if the patient has cut and made every stitch
of it herself ! How much more profitable to the pecuniary in
terests of the State is this robbing of its citizens, than it would

THE SANE KEPT. 205

be to pay their just debts ! If it were not for this slave labor
the State would be compelled to have double the number of
attendants to do all this work, which it now gets as a gratuity
out of its prisoners.

Dr. McFarland is a good financier for the State in this par-
ticular, but a miserable one for the interests of the State's
prisoners under his care. If the State wish the interests of
its unfortunates cared for, they must get some other person
than Dr. McFarland to do this for them, or it never will
be done.

He knows that the pecuniary interests of the State demand
munificent pecuniary resources to meet the immense de-
struction of State property which is constantly going on,
through his stolid indifference.

Could the State but be allowed to know the management as
it really is, not as the Doctor reports it to be, they would be
horror struck at the extravagant, unnecessary and unreason-
able amount, oi property destroyed merely as the legitimate
result of this insane management.

The rules as they are practically carried out are unreasonable
and unjust in the extreme. Much property is oftentimes wan-
tonly destroyed as the legitimate result of this cruel injustice.
There is no other manner in which they can express their just
indignation of the power which is thus oppressing them. The
amount of property thus unnecessarily destroyed which is
daily going on, might relieve the wants of thousands who stand
in perishing need of the comforts it might furnish for them.

Just consider how unjustly I am treated here. Here my
good, firm health is suffering from my close confinement ;
and in duty to myself I reported my state to Dr. McFarland,
and asked if I could not be allowed fifteen minutes exercise
in the open air daily, without an attendant, and he denied
my request.

I then concluded I would avail myself of the laws of the

206 MODERN PERSECUTION.

house, and go to the wash-house or ironing-rooms, and there
work for the State, that I might thus secure the exercise and
fresh air my health demanded. But lo ! here I am met with
Dr. McFaiiand's strict command not to let me out for this
purpose, while other prisoners can go at their option.

I have not done anything to forfeit my right to this privi-
lege, guaranteed by law to the prisoners, to my knowledge, or
to the knowledge of any other one. And. yet Dr. McFarland
has just as good a reason for denying me this right, as he had
for removing me from the best ward to the worst.

Neither I nor any other one in the house have ever known
his reasons for thus treating me ; but on the contrary, we
know that he had no right or excuse for doing so. Nothing
but sovereign, arbitrary rule dictates his course of treatment
towards me. Yes, he is ruling me with a rod oi iron, and I,
in my deeply sensitive nature, am suffering protracted mar-
tyrdom at his hands.

At the request oi Mrs. McFarland, the Doctor finally con-
sented to my going into the sewing-room for the half of each
day, while other prisoners can go all day, if they choose.
Thus, by sewing for the State, as its imprisoned slave, I can
buy the privilege of exchanging the putrid, loathsome air of
the ward, for the more wholesome, purer atmosphere of the
sewing-room for half a day.

But instead of this being a relief, it seems to be only an
aggravation of the evil, for the air of the hall seems doubly
grievous and unendurable by contrast, and the incessant noise
and uproar of the maniacs, seems heightened every time I
return to the roar of the tempest after a short calm.

I think I can well pay my way, by making a vest or pair of
pants daily, to swell the aggregate of Dr. McFarland's report
of the pecuniary profits arising solely from this slave labor.
This is my only alternative to get better air for my health !

If I were a male prisoner, I might perhaps be allowed, under

THE SANE KEPT. 207

a watchful keeper, to go on to the Doctor's great farm, and
hoe his corn and potatoes, with his sixty other day laborers,
which this house furnishes, without cost to himself, for his
exclusive benefit.

And thus, by Dr. McFarland's granting me the right to
breathe the fresh air of heaven, I might help fill his coffers,
by my unpaid labor.

I might thus help Dr. McFarland to publish his benevolent
deeds to the world, that he gives to the poor around him
yearly, a bushel of potatoes from his own farm !

Or it might help to buy some of the costly wines, and
cigars, and confectioneries with which the asylum feast tables
are loaded, at the State's expense, to the credit of Dr.
McFarland's great hospitality !

Yes, it may pay for the intoxicating drinks the company of
soldiers to which his eldest son belonged, used on that memora-
ble occasion, when they, after this drunken debauch, stalked
through our halls, headed by their drunken leader, to see us,
the boarders of the house, put off with nothing but bread and
molasses to eat, and nothing but a single saucer left to eat it
from ; for we were deprived of every cup, spoon, knife and fork,
and chair, to supply the table of Dr. McFarland's guests.

If we could have had one raisin, or cake, or candy, or
apple, or any thing, left in the shape of fragments from that
groaning table of luxuries, in exchange for the vegetables,
strawberries, butter, sugar, and tea, they took from our table,
we should have felt better satisfied.

I could not help sympathizing with the remark made by
our kind attendant, Miss Tomlin, on that well-remembered
occasion — as we stood around our table, dipping our bread
into our black molasses. The Doctor seemed inclined to shut
this scene from the soldiers' view who followed after ; but
Miss Tomlin, instead of granting this wish, said, as she
opened the door :

208 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" No, let them see us as we are. Let them see how our
table comforts compare with their own ! "

It may help too, to pay for the costly wine which Mrs. Coe
told me she had seen carried, by the pail full, into the cham-
ber of his eldest son, to treat his companions with, taken
from the asylum storehouse of luxuries, charged for the
" good of the patients."

Seldom, very seldom, did a drop of these wines ever pass
the lips of a patient, for his " good " or evil either.

Dr. McFarland's mode of u impressing " free citizens of
these United States into Ms service is truly profitable, if not
novel, in that it pays him well, as a public financier.

CHAPTER XXVIII.

Record of a Day.

The record of one day is a record of all, since I came to this
ward. I rise with the breakfast bell, which rings about fifteen
minutes before we are called to the table. I first drop upon
my knees and offer a short prayer for protection and guidance,
and then drink a tumbler of rain water, which, in connection
with my other health regimen, proves effectual in producing
good digestion, which habit is so indispensably necessary to
perfect health and mental vigor.

I wet my head in soft water, and wash my hands and face and
dress myself as quickly as possible.

I then throw off my bed clothes, article by article, giving
each a shaking to air it, and stir up the husks of my mattress,
and then leave them all airing while I eat my breakfast. I
sleep with my window wide open, both summer and winter.

After breakfast, I finish making my bed, sweep and dust my
room, and then invite the ladies of our hall to my room, to
prayers, leaving each entirely free to come or not just as they
choose.

There is but one chapel service daily, and that is at night.

Sometimes one, sometimes three, and oftentimes no one re-
sponds to my invitation by coming to prayers.

After reading and praying I commence my studies, by first
writing in my diary and journal. I pursue a systematic course
of studying the Bible and writing out my conclusions, and then
read some scientific book requiring thought and close attention,
until eleven o'clock.

I then take a full bath of cold water, and follow it with
vigorous friction, accompanied with gymnastic exercises, adap-
ted to the expansion of the chest and muscles of the system. I

210 MODERN PERSECUTION.

pursue this vigorous exercise before my open window until I
find it a sweet relief to sir down and comb my hair thoroughly.

I then complete my toilet for the day, all of which occupies
nearly one hour's time. I am then in a condition to relish my
dinner, after which, I read some light literature, or the daily
paper, over which, I often drop to sleep in my chair, and thus
take a short nap.

I then take my embroidery and do a certain amount, while
at the same time committing to memory certain passages, which
I have marked in my reading as worthy of particular note ;
or, while sewing, meet my attendants, Miss Tomlin and
Miss McKelva, in the large dormitory, and there listen to
readings from Shakespeare's plays which we mutually agree to
do for our individual improvement.

This occupies my mind completely until the horn blows for
supper, when the farm hands are all summoned in from their
work in the fields, about five o'clock.

I take no supper, finding that two meals are all my
present habits render necessary for the unimpeded and health-
ful operations of nature.

I noticed that while taking suppers my sleep was not so
quiet and refreshing as it ought to be — that I awoke with a
bad taste in my mouth, and had but little appetite for my
breakfast. I felt rather averse to effort. Aware that I
was over-feeding instead of refreshing nature, I dispensed
with my suppers entirely, and all these symptoms and indiffer-
ent feelings subsided, and I felt well, that is, had no special
reason for considering that I had a body to care for, so quiet
and unimpeded were its functions carried on.

The body thus cared for instead of being an incumbrance
to the mind, became only its faithful -servant.

My sleep is now really a luxury, even amid this den of how-
ling maniacs, and my breakfasts and dinners are peculiarly well
relished — have not a pain or uneasy sensation whatever in

RECORD OF A DAY. 211

my physical system to which to call the mind's attention.
How thankful am I for my practical knowledge of the laws
of my physical nature ; for I do believe that godliness, or
living according to God's laws, is profitable in every respect ;
and ungodliness, or trespasing on nature's laws, cannot be
done with impunity.

After supper I lay aside my work, and devote myself to
amusing the patients, by dancing and playing with them until
after chapel service, when they are locked up for the night.

I go through my gymnastics again at night in my room, and
drink my tumbler of soft water, and pray, and go joyfully to
bed to sleep and pleasant dreams.

1 often feel when rising, as much relieved and rested from
my troubles, as if I had really been absent from my prison, on
a pleasant visit to loved friends. It sometimes takes me some
minutes to realize where I am, on awaking from such pleasant
dreams.

I often think this hell is not so unmitigated in its torments
as the hell of lost spirits is represented to be, by their resting
not, day nor night. Could not these prison torments be sus-
pended by sleep, they must soon become too intolerable for
physical nature to sustain. God grant me deliverance from
endless, unmitigated torment !

The discipline of this hell has had one influence over my
moral feelings which is certainly conducive to inward peace of
mind, and that is, I am becoming comparatively indifferent to
the " speech of people," which is really one of the greatest bug-
bears in the universe. I now think it is much better to do
as we please, or rather as we think it right, promptly, and
independently, than to square our conclusions by other peo-
ple's estimates.

Blessed be independence and moral courage ! for by these
alone can we secure the approbation of a good conscience.

Let me get above " folks," where I can breath a pure

212 MODERN PERSECUTION.

atmosphere and live. The idea of suffocating and choking to
death down in the vitiating atmosphere of a meddlesome and
gossiping world, is very disagreeable.

The record of every day's experience here of this doleful
prison life, carries me farther and farther above this groveling
atmosphere, so that my mind finds peace amid tumult and
noisy strife.

For the benefit of others who may be called to endure similar
trials, I will add, that I find it an invaluable habit to be able
to secure good sleep, and plenty of it, to fortify one invincibly
against the attacks of ulow spirits." ,

To be a " good sleeper" is as indispensable to a happy, vigor-
ous state of the intellect, as being a " good eater" is to a good
physical condition.

And my signal triumph over low or depressed spirits, which
never for one entire day disturbed my inward peace of mind,
during all my imprisonment, is greatly owing to my constant
practice of sleeping soundly from ten to eleven hours out of
the twenty-four.

The need of this habit was presented first to my mind by my
scientific reading in the Asylum, where it was shown that
whenever the brain had unusual burdens to carry, either in the
form of trials or of deep study, a greater amount of sleep was
indispensable to sustaining it unharmed.

CHAPTER XXIX.

How I Bought and Retained some Paper.

Before narrating the incidents concerning the paper, I will
state a few facts incidentally bearing upon the subject.

As I have before stated, orders were expressly given on my
removal to the eighth ward, that I be not allowed to go out
of it at all except to chapel service.

These orders were strictly enforced for about five months,
when orders were received that I might be allowed to ride
and walk out with the patients.

I have reason to think myself indebted to Miss Lynch for
this privilege, as she was the first who bore to me the message
in these words :

" Mrs. Packard, the Doctor has given me permission to take
you to ride to-day in company with his daughter Hattie."

Availing myself of this privilege, I took with me the only
capital I owned in the whole world, viz. — a silver dime —
which Dr. McFarland had given me, and which by an unac-
countable combination of circumstances, he supposed was
justly my due, determining if possible to invest this capital in
paper — now the great want of my existence.

At my request, Miss Lynch left me at Dr. Shirley's office,
to get some unfinished work done on my teethrwhile she and
Hattie rode off.

While they were gone I took occasion to step put to make
my investment. But recollecting that five months before, in
settling up my account at the " Philadelphia Store," I found
myself indebted five cents above what I was able to pay, and
accordingly asked Mr. Woodman to trust me for it, assuring
him I should pay him the first opportunity. He however gal-
lantly replied, " it is of no consequence, you are welcome to it."

214 MODERN PERSECUTION.

But as I felt bound in honor to fulfill my promise, I went
directly to this store, and after stating the circumstances,
offered my dime to meet my obligation, secretly praying how-
ever, that he would still insist upon it that it was of " no con-
sequence" to him, for it was of great value to me — half my
fortune !

But in this I was disappointed, for it was now his clerk
with whom I was doing my business instead of the kind Mr.
Woodman, the owner. So after searching his money drawer
over in vain to find the five cents my due, he left me alone in
the store long enough to steal half his goods had I been so
disposed, and went to the bank to get my dime changed, and
thus obtained my five cents.

But having no paper, as I had before offered to take it in
paper, I hastened to the nearest bookstore, where I bought
five cents worth of damaged foolscap, which amounted to eight
sheets !

Overjoyed at the success of my investment, being three ex-
tra sheets above the current price, I, with the lightest heart
and quickest step possible, returned to Dr. Shirley's office,
lest Mary get there before me.

But alas ! the tardy bank was so long in changing my dime,
that she drove up to the door just as I returned to be thus
caught ! But by carefully concealing my long roll of foolscap
under my shawl as best I could, I thought I had satisfied her
inquiry as to where I had been, by telling her I had been to
the Philadelphia Store to pay a debt.

But alas ! the long roll of foolscap would so protrude itself
against my shawl as to lead her to suspect I had not told the
whole truth in reporting myself. However she did not express
these thoughts to me until that evening when just before
chapel, she came to me with this question:

" Mrs. Packard, did you get any paper when I took you to
ride to day ? "

BOUGHT AND RETAINED PATER. 215

" Why do you ask me that question, Mary ? "
" Because I thought I saw something under your shawl
which you seemed to try to conceal from me."

" What if I did ? haven't I a right to carry things without
your knowledge ? "

" You have no right to carry paper without my knowledge,
for the Doctor has expressly forbidden me to let you have a
scrap of writing paper, and if you have used the privilege I
granted you of riding out, by getting yourself paper, I must
report you to the Doctor. Did you get paper, or did you not ?"

"I did, Mary, get five cents' worth ? "

" I must report you to the Doctor — it is my duty."

" I am sorry, Mary, your conscience dictates such a course,
still if it does, obey it, for I know you will favor me whenever
you can conscientiously do so."

As she left the hall, I as quickly as possible, took the three
extra sheets from my roll and hid them about my person, leav-
ing the roll in the top of an old box which I was using as a
trunk to keep my things in, with one dress simply covering
the roll.

After chapel, when the ladies were nearly all locked up
for the night in their rooms, the Doctor's steps were heard in
our hall, and as he entered at one end, I left my room at the
opposite end, and as we approached each other we met at about
the middle of the hall, when standing directly in front of me,
he remarked, with his eye fixed most intently upon me :

" Mrs. Packard, did you get some paper when you went to
ride with Miss Lynch, to-day ? "

" Yes sir ! " said I looking him also full in the eye.

" Will you give me the paper if I ask you for it ? "

" No sir ! " with emphasis, said I.

" Will you give it to me if I demand it of you ? "

"No sir ! " with greater emphasis.

216 MODERN PERSECUTION.

For a moment we stood looking at each other in silent
amazement, then he said :

" Where is the paper ? "

" With my things."

We then passed each other, he going to my room to attend
to his business, and I to the opposite end of the hall to attend
to mine.

When I returned, I found the Doctor searching the table
drawer where I kept my choice things, the key to which I
carried in my own pocket ; but it seemed the Doctor had
opened it with some other key. I wonder if there are any
locks which Dr. McFarland's keys cannot lawfully open !

After watching his movements, while he stood bent over
my drawer, carefully opening every box, large and small, and
pocketing such articles as he chose, such as bits of pencils,
and old pens, and any articles of stationery he could find, I
left the room, while he was ransacking the paraphernalia of
woman's toilet, remarking to my dormitory companions as I
left:

" Ladies, bear witness to this robbery ! "

Failing to find the paper he was in search of, he closed and
locked the drawer, then asked the ladies if they knew of any
other place where Mrs. Packard kept her things.

Miss Goldsby replied, " She keeps some in this box, I be-
lieve," pointing to a cushioned covered seat near by.

This box, the size of a common trunk, was full of my
larger articles of wearing apparel, which he carefully searched
throughout.

But failing to find the roll of foolscap, because in such plain
sight, near the top ! he left, chagrined and mortified at hia
failure, and locking the door of my room as he passed out, he
left me alone in the hall, while he, with a quick, anxious tread,
passed speechlessly by me, out of the hall, closing the dead-
lock upon me.

BOUGHT AND RETAINED PAPER. 217

As I alone paced the hall, silently ruminating npon my prob-
able fate, I saw the hall door open, and the Doctor entered,
followed by his porter. " Now," thought I, " I am to be trans-
ported off to some dungeon or secret cell, to suffer the penalty
for telling the truth to him and my attendant."

And stepping up deliberately, in front of the porter, I claunt-
lessly stood, with folded arms, ready to be unresistingly borne
to my place of torture. •

The friendly porter, who had more than twenty times put
the reins of the carriage horse into my hands, and received my
" thank you," as often, just gave me a smile, and a respectful
bow of recognition, and passing me, followed the Doctor into
my room.

He soon appeared again with what the Doctor supposed was
my trunk, in his hands, and followed the Doctor with it up to
the trunk-room, where it was left beyond the reach of Mrs.
Packard's accommodation.

Thus the Doctor had the satisfaction of feeling that if Mrs.
Packard has baffled him in finding the paper, he has been able
to annoy her by taking her trunk ! But as the event proved,
the Doctor, upon a second overhauling of my things in the trunk-
room, found the roll of foolscap ; and being five sheets, he felt
that this amount answered to the five cent's worth Miss Lynch
told him I had bought, so that, after unlocking my large trunk
in the trunk-room, and robbing it of all my letters, and papers,
and manuscripts of every kind, he felt satisfied, that, at last,
his plan to defeat his prisoner of her rights had succeeded,
even in my case.

But don't let the great Doctor feel too confident that he has
gained the laurels of victory, after all, for he did not know that
his wife furnished me with a better trunk, and more of my
wardrobe than ever before, with a key to it also.

And besides, the Doctor did not know that I still kept and
faithfully used, the three large sheets of foolscap, from which I
10

218 MODERN PERSECUTION.

am now copying for the public advertising of himself, through
this record of his own actions !

No, neither did he know that this ungallant assault upon a
defenseless woman's rights, aroused the just indignation of the
house in sympathy with his victim ; so that it came to be re-
garded as a part of the code of honor in that house afterwards,
to evade the mandate to " keep all stationery from Mrs. Pack-
ard," so that the employees willingly followed the example
which Mrs. McFarland set them, to furnish me with supplies,
clandestinely, whenever they could safely do so.

In this way, he, himself, furnished me with sufficient mate-
rial to print a volume quadruple this size when it is all printed !
Can not God cause the " wrath of man to praise him 1"

CHAPTER XXX.

How Mr. Packard gave me Paper, and
how Dr. MeFarland stole it.

Mr. Packard visited the Institution twice during the three
years I was imprisoned in it.

But these visits were not designed to comfort and cheer me
with the hope of deliverance from my prison life at some
future time, but to perpetuate it, through his influence over
the Superintendent and the Trustees.

He visited me in my cell — saw my companions — the
howling, raving maniacs — and although he feared for his own
life while among them, he expressed no fears for my own.

He tried to raise his voice so much above the roar of this
tempest of human passions and seething hate, as to make me
understand that I was under obligations of gratitude to him
for replenishing my wardrobe for a longer campaign !

But he failed to make me appreciate this obligation of
gratitude due a benefactor, who was only restoring stolen prop-
erty to its rightful owner. What obligation am I under to
the robber who meets me in. the street and robs me of all I
have, my watch, and purse, and even my wearing apparel, and
then comes and asks me to bestow on him my grateful thanks
for presenting me my own wardrobe, as his gift.

Either the tumultuous elements surrounding me, or the lack
of capacity within me, or both, prevented my seeing this obli-
gation due him as my benefactor ! My sense of justice will
not allow me to thank robbers for gifts which are already my
own property ; therefore, this reverend divine was obliged to
leave, feeling that he was a much injured man, because his
benefactions were so little appreciated by his ungrateful benefi-
ciary !

220 MODERN PERSECUTION.

Although the articles from my wardrobe which he brought
to me in the prison, were the most inferior part of it, being in
the main, clothes which I had done wearing, and had laid
aside for donations to others more destitute than myself ; yet,
destitute as I then was, they were very acceptable, for I had
ample time for making new things out of old, and thus appear
in quite a respectable costume for that place.

But there was one article he brought me, for which I did
really feel so grateful, I could hardly control this emotion by
my principles or reason. I felt so instinctively grateful for the
large roll of writing paper, envelopes, and stationery, that I
almost spoke my thanks, before reason had had time to give
her verdict to the contrary.

He saw that my joy was almost boundless, at this most un-
expected possession.

As soon as he left, I commenced writing a letter to my
children on it, feeling no need of secrecy now. Therefore,
when Dr. McFarland caught me quietly using, my stationery,
he, in astonishment, inquired :

" And where did you get your paper ?"

" Mr. Packard gave it to me."

" How did Mr. Packard come to give you paper ?"

" I don't know, sir. I suppose, however, he felt that it
might be an innocent amusement for me to write here, know-
ing I loved to write when I was at home."

" How much did he give you ?"

" Quite a number of sheets."

" Let me see it."

I then took the roll from under my pillow and handed it to
him, saying :

" Here it is."

Before this I had taken out one-half of it and hid it about
^y person. I did not tell him of this !

He took the roll, examined it carefully and thoughtfully, for

STOLEN PAPER. 221

some minutes, then putting the whole under the breast of his
coat, he remarked :

" I will take charge of this."

And he has been true to his word ; for I have been relieved
from this charge ever since.

But the matter did not stop here. The Superintendent
arraigned the Minister as an intruder into his business, and
authoritatively demanded of this husband why he had given
paper to his wife.

The husband replied, he did it for her comfort and amuse-
ment.

The Superintendent then, after giving the Minister a severe
reprimand, finished by the threat, that if he ever attempted to
interfere again with his management or discipline of his wife,
he should have the liberty of taking her away, forthwith.

This terrible threat silenced the Minister into unanswering
submission to the superior mandates of the Superintendent,
over the control of his wife's destiny.

CHAPTER XXXI.

My Family Relatives.

Not far from this date I find a copy of a letter I sent to my
own dear father in Sunderland, Mass., viz.:

My Dear Father : Dr. McFarland, the Superintendent, has
given me permission to write you a letter. This is the first
opportunity I have had to write to you. Hitherto all commu-
nication with my friends has been denied me, except through
my husband.

Father, I am entombed here without cause. But I am try-
ing to bear my wrongs as patiently as I can. The suggestion
has often been made that I write to you clandestinely, so that
you might know how unjustly I am treated, and some have
promised to write for me, but as yet I have thought it best to
break no rule of the institution.

My trust in the rectitude of a divine providence, is still un-
shaken, notwithstanding the clouds and darkness in which my
destiny is enveloped.

Yes, my dear Father, your Elizabeth is called to tread a very
thorny path. Her road to heaven is through a vast howling
wilderness, where no rills of earthly comfort are allowed her,
to refresh her weary fainting spirit. Not only are all the
comforts and blessings of a Christian home denied me, but
even my personal liberty for nearly one whole year, has al-
ready been taken from me through marital usurpation.

Oh, my Father ! how my heart has bled and my soul grieved
in agony, at being thus separated from my own flesh and
blood — my precious children. My own husband has forced
me from my God-given charge, and imprisoned me, with no
prospect, but that it must be life-long, simply for daring to
defend what I thought to be truth.

MY FAMILY RELATIVES. 223

He has made out a charge of insanity on this ground alone,
while in all my conduct he can allege nothing against me. I
have neglected no duties, have injured no one, have always
tried to do unto others as I would wish to be done by ; and
yet, here in America, I am imprisoned because I could not
say I believed what I did not believe.

Oh, Father, can't you help me ? Can't you take me to your
own home for a short time, and try me, and see if I am in-
sane ?

If you feel that you are too old to come yourself, do let
brother Austin come and see me, at least, and then if he
thinks this asylum is the proper place for me, I will consent
to stay.

But with no trial and no chance for self-defence, is it not
unjust to leave your only daughter uncared for any longer ?
Do, Father, do something, to get justice done to me and my
precious children.

Your affectionate daughter,

Elizabeth.

For my father's defence, I will here add, that the Superin-
tendent sent with my letter one of his own, which destroyed
the influence of mine.

And as the Superintendent and the husband both agreed in
opinion respecting me, it is not so strange that a man nearly
eighty years old, should heed their statements, rather than
those of one whom he supposed insane.

He had unbounded confidence in the integrity of his son-in-
law, Mr. Packard, and he, of course, concluded that a man
sustained by the State must be a reliable man, whose opinion
demanded respect and confidence.

Therefore, instead of coming to my rescue, he sent one
hundred dollars to Mr. Packard, to help him in keeping my
imprisonment perpetuated !

Another fact. Mr. Packard succeeded in influencing the

224 MODERN PERSECUTION.

Trustees to place me on their charity list, and then carefully
concealed this fact from my father, so that he could beg the
more successfully from him, the patrimony which was my due.
Thus he kept my patrimony, and secured my support from the
State of Illinois.

My persecution reminds me ol Father Chinique's experi-
ence, when his friends forsook him, because he had forsaken
the errors of the Catholic Church.

So I, when, from the clearest convictions of conscience, for-
sook and exposed the errors of our Church, and endorsed
some truths found in the Methodist, the Baptist, the Unitarian,
the Universalist, the Catholic, and other denominations ; in
short, when I endorsed the Truth, instead of Presbyterianism,
for my creed, nearly all my former friends seemed to regard
this extension of charity as an unpardonable offence, deserv-
ing eternal punishment from them and all civilized society !
This is the penalty I am called to bear, for the crime of be-
coming a self-reliant thinker, and tolerant Christian in the
Presbyterian Church.

This Institution, my friends, and the church, may hold me
on this rack of insanity as long as they choose ; I shall hold
myself in defiance of them all, an independent thinker, and
a charitable Christian ; and shall be all the more independent,
on account of this opposition.

I used to have an almost unbounded respect and reverence,
for Theologians and Doctors of Divinity ; but I am happy to
say, that now I have more respect for my own individuality,
than for them all.

To some, this may seem like an arrogant spirit ; but it is not.
I do not say, like these Theologians, that my opinion is the
standard for any other individual ; but, on the contrary, that
it is not. No other individual in the whole world is to be
judged by this standard of belief but myself. Therefore, it
would be arrogant in me to try to get others to adopt my

MY FAMILY RELATIVES. 225

standard as their own. God requires of them the same in-
dividuality that he is developing in me.

I am sorry to say that my father sustained this cruel con-
spiracy for years, persistently resisting all light, unless it came
through the medium of the conspirators.

But he did this ignorantly, not wilfully ; for I rejoice to add,
that when he saw me, about eighteen months after my libera-
tion, his paternal feeling so gained the mastery of his bigotry,
(he was a minister of the same creed as Mr. Packard,) that
he soon saw his mistake, and then he tried to counteract the
influence he had encouraged in believing me to be insane. He
now fully believed I had never been insane at all, and from
that time he has been a father indeed to me. As proof of this
assertion, I here give his certificate :

"KEV. SAMUEL WARE'S CERTIFICATE TO THE PUBLIC.

" This is to certify that the certificates which have appeared
in public, in relation to my daughter's sanity, were given upon
the conviction that Mr. Packard's representations respecting
her condition were true and were given wholly upon the au-
thority of Mr. Packard's own statements. I do, therefore,
hereby certify, that it is now my opinion that Mr. Packard has
had no cause for treating my daughter Elizabeth as an insane
person.

Samuel Ware.

. ( Olive Ware,*

Attest. | Austin Ware.

South Deerfield, August 2, 1866."

And here it may be due to my two brothers to state, that
they, like my father, sustained this conspiracy for too long a
time, through the ' misrepresentations of Mr. Packard. But
like him, they did it ignorantly, not wilfully ; for just as soon
as they saw me, and had an opportunity to judge for themselves

*My step mother. My own mother died in 1844.

10*

226 MODERN PERSECUTION.

they became my valiant defenders, both publicly and privately,
and have ever since seemed determined, by their extra kind-
ness to me, to make all the restitution the gospel requires, as
evidence of sincere repentance.

Of course, I have long since most freely forgiven them, for
to me, they are like what Lazarus was to his sisters, " raised
from the dead." This temporary death of their natural affec-
tions seems to have been quickened into a new, higher, deeper,
and tenderer love for me than ever before.

But to sister Mary, my brother Samuel's wife, is due the
highest compliment, for she is one of the precious few who
escaped the psychological influence of this learned and popu-
lar minister, my husband, in that he could never, for one mo-
ment, convince her that I was an insane person.

She, with my adopted sister, Mrs. Angeline Field, of Gran-
ville, Illinois, both stood erect before this minister, on their
version of his statements, in maintaining their own individual
opinions respecting my sanity.

But sister Angeline, I am happy to say, had her husband,
Mr. David Field, to encourage and sustain her in defending
my sanity ; while sister Mary had her husband to combat, in
defending me.

CHAPTER

Old Mrs. Timmons Deserted by Her
Children.

This lady was brought to the Asylum about one year and a
half before I left. For several months she occupied the same
•ward with me, and from the day she was entered she was my
daily companion. I took pleasure in her society as she seemed
perfectly sane, and sorely afflicted at the fact that her friends
would not let her remain with them at home. She was above
sixty years of age, but showed no signs of premature old age
or ill health. The longer I saw her, the greater was my as-
tonishment that she should be called insane.

From her I learned the reason she was imprisoned was, that
one night she got up in a somnambulic state and went to her
son's bed, and inflicted two blows upon his cheek with an axe.
This her friends regarded as evidence of insanity, although
she had no recollection or knowledge of doing so.

This son brought her to the Asylum, and the dreadful scar
on his cheek authenticated her statement. She always ex-
pressed the keenest sorrow and the most true penitence for
having done this dreadful deed, for this was her favorite son.

She was willing to do anything possible to atone for it, if
she could but live at home with her dear children. She
begged to be locked up nights by herself, lest she do an injury
again to some one, but she could not bear to be put into this
terrible place to spend her days as a criminal, when no one
regretted the deed being done more than herself. The thought
of having thus harmed her darling child was agony enough,
as she thought, to make atonement for the deed, without suf-
fering this awful penalty.

Mrs. Timmons had already endured one term of nine months

228 MODERN PERSECUTION.

imprisonment for this act, in an Asylum in Indianapolis, where
she assured me the inmates were treated no better than at
Jacksonville, and her friends knew she had much rather be
buried than to be put into another such Institution.

Yet, they could tell her she was not going into an Asylum,
but only going to consult a physician about her health, and
thus they decoyed her behind another " dead-lock," to be free
no more !

As I listened to her expression of hopeless agony uttered
when sure the Doctor could not hear, I could not but feel that
the custom of professedly barbarous nations, which allows the
aged and infirm to be left in the woods to be eaten by wild
beasts, was not so barbarous as this mode of disposing of un-
welcome citizens, which the civilization of the nineteenth cen-
tury has rendered popular ; for the lingering protracted tortures
of dying in this institution are far more to be dreaded than
the shorter, quicker mode of being devoured by wild beasts.

Indeed, I often heard this distressed woman express this
preference in these words :

" Oh, if I could only live under a fence, for my home, rather
than here, I would rejoice in the exchange ! anything or every-
thing would I give for my liberty ! any death would be sweet
to such a life as this ! "

And yet this is a Christian institution .

" Yes, this is ' Modern Persecution ! ' "

Her maternal feelings reached such a pitch of agony that it
was to relieve her I consented to write the following letter for
her, which I sent to her friends on my " underground express."
" Insane Asylum, January 29, 1862.

My Dear Children : My heart is almost broken in conse-
quence of the course you have taken towards me. Do write
and explain yourselves, or what would be better, come and
tell me, for as I now feel; it seems to me I shall soon grieve
myself to death.

MRS. T1MM0NS. 229

Why could you not take care of your poor afflicted mother
yourselves, and not again trust me with strangers where you
know I have suffered so much ? Oh, do tell me why you
have treated me so !

You know I told you I was willing to live in a room by
myself, locked up both day and night if you were afraid of
me, if you would only let me live at home and take care of
me yourselves.

You know too, I have always done just as you told me
without objecting in the least, and now how can you put me
off so again ? Did not John tell me he had forgiven me for
injuring him ? and have I ever attempted to injure any one
else ? Is it not punishing me more than I deserve to imprison
me twice for the same thing, when you say I was not to
blame for doing it as I did ?

You treat me worse than if I was a convict, for they do not
deceive them, but tell them plainly, what they imprison them
for, and for how long a time they must bear their punish-
ment.

But this time you did not even tell me why you imprisoned
me, nor do I know that you ever intend to trust me with you
again ! I shall die of grief before long, unless you do- some-
thing to alleviate my 'heart sorrows. I could not treat you as
you have me, and Oh, how can you punish me so severely for
doing a sinless act?

Oh, children ! am I in danger of perpetuating my imprison-
ment by revealing to you the inmost feelings of my heart ? If
so, what shall I do ? If my own children will not relieve their
agonized mother, when it is so easy for them to do so, by
simply taking me home, I do not know what I shall do.

The hope that you will do so as soon as you consistently
can, after receiving this letter, will sustain me, till then, and
when that hope is gone, it seems to me I shall die.

Do not delay one day, for you cannot imagine how long

230 MODERN PERSECUTION.

time seems here ; one day seems like a month elsewhere.
It is not that I am abused physically, for I am not. It is
not this which causes my suffering, but the thought of your
treating your old mother as you do that is killing me.

Yes, killing me ! For my sake do not let the Doctor know
of my sending you this letter.

Your Mother,

M. A. Timmons.

But I am sorry to say that her relatives did let the Doctor
know of it, and did nothing to relieve her !

The Doctor then removed her to another ward to cut off
her communication with me, suspecting that I had helped, in
some way, to get her letter out.

I retained a copy of this letter in my journal, and now give it
to the public that my readers may see what feelings the asylum
discipline produces. Is it right thus to punish for a misfortune ?

Her children came to visit her twice while I was there, and
although they found her working like a slave for the asylum
and Dr. McFarland's family, and never showing the least
aberration of mind, they would leave her, with the promise
that just as soon as they could get a room prepared for her in
the new house they were building with her own money (they
were rich) they would take her home. »

They told her the room would be ready in about three
weeks, and although six years have already elapsed, this
promise remains unfulfilled !

The mother who bore them and earned for them the com-
forts of their own homes, is still left to pine away, a prisoner's
life of rayless comfort, doing the cooking in the Doctor's
kitchen.

When these children become old and gray-headed, how will
they like to have their children treat them as they are treating
their mother ? " With what measure ye mete, it shall be
measured to you again."

CHAPTER XXXIII.

Mrs. Cheneworth's Suicide — Medical
Abuse.

Mrs. Cheneworth hung herself in her own room, after
retiring from the dancing party, last night.

Her measure of grace was not sufficient to enable her to
bear the accumulated burdens of her hard fate any longer.
She was driven to desperation.

I cannot blame her for deliberately preferring death, to
such a life as she has been experiencing in this asylum. She
has literally been driven to it by abuse.

She was entered in my ward, where she remained for sev-
eral weeks, when she was removed to the lowest ward, where
she has been murdered by slow tortures.

If this institution is not responsible for the life of Mrs.
Cheneworth, then I don't know what murder is.

She was evidently insane when she entered — she was not re-
sponsible, although her reason was not entirely dethroned.'
Her moral nature was keenly sensitive ; her power of self-con-
trol was crushed by disease and medical maltreatment. She
resisted until she evidently saw it was useless to expect justice,
and was just crushed beneath this powerful despotism.

She was a lovely woman, fitted both by nature and educa-
tion to be an ornament to society and her family. Gentle
and confiding, with a high sense of honor and self-respect,
she despised all degrading associations.

From her own representations, I inferred she had been the
pet and pride of her parents — a kind of household goddess in
her father's family. Under these benign influences her
virtues were fostered, and she had the satisfaction of being
loved and appreciated.

232 MODERN PERSECUTION.

She had been quite a belle, and finally from her many
admirers, she married one of her own, but not of her parents'
choice. In him she seemed to have found everything her
heart could desire. He both loved and appreciated herr as
well he might.

She was small, delicately and gracefully formed, and pecu-
liarly lady-like in her manners. She was a most accomplished
dancer, having been trained in the school of the best French
dancers in the country.

Her complexion white and clear, with regular features ;
dark but mild and tender eyes ; hair long, black and glossy.
In short she was a little, beautiful, fawn-like creature, when
she came to this Institution.

She had been here a short time once before, after the birth
of her first child ; and from her account I inferred that her
restoration to reason was not then attended with the grim
spectre of horrors which must have inevitably accompanied
this.

She had left a young babe, this time, which her physician
advised her to wean, since she was now in a delicate condi-
tion. Thus her overtasked physical nature, abused as it was
by bad medical treatment, added to the double burden she
was called to endure, could not sustain the balance of her
mental faculties.

Her nerves were unstrung, and lost their natural tone by
the influence of opium, that most deadly foe of nature, which
evidently caused her insanity.

The opium was expected to operate as a quietus to her then
excited nervous system ; but instead of this, it only increased
her nervous irritability. The amount was then increased, and
this course persisted in, until her system became drunk, as it
were, by its influence. The effect produced was like that of
excessive drinking, when it causes delirium tremens. Thus
she became a victim to that absurd practice of the medical

jrlRS. CHENE WORTH' S SUICIDE. 233

profession, which depends upon poisons instead of nature to
cure disease.

It is not natural to cure disease by creating disease. To
poison nature, is not the natural way to eradicate poison from
the system. To load nature with additional burdens, is not
the way to lighten its previous burdens.

But common sense dictates that the natural way to aid na-
ture in throwing off her diseases, is to strengthen the powers
of healing, and thereby directly assist her in curing disease.

Nature's energies are strengthened, renewed and nourished
by rest, quiet, sleep, food, air, cleanliness, freedom, exercise,
etc. ; and medical skill consists in adapting these agencies to
their peculiar functions, so that the special want of nature
may be met by its natural supply.

What Mrs. Cheneworth wanted, was the nourishment of her
exhausted physical nature, by rest, food, air, and exercise.

She did not need to have the powers of her system thrown
into confusion by taxing them with poisons, which nature must
either counteract and resist, or be overcome by them, and sink
into death. Nature was importuning for help to bear her
burdens, being already overtasked.

But instead of listening to these demands, her blinded friends
allowed her to be thus medically abused. After having suffered
her to receive this treatment, which brought into a still worse
condition — an insane state — when more than ever she needed
help and the most tender, watchful care ; then to be cast oft
in her helplessness upon strangers, who knew nothing of her
character, her habits, her propensities, her cravings, her dis-
position, or her constitution ; how could they reasonably ex-
pect her thus to receive the care necessary to her recovery ?
They probably did expect it, and on this false basis placed
her here for appropriate medical treatment.

What a delusion the world is laboring under, to expect such
treatment here ! Did they but know the truth, they would

234 MODERN PERSECUTION.

find that all the " medical treatment" they get here, is that
of locks and keys !

Thus having hidden them from observation, and cut them
off from all communication with their friends, they then in-
flict upon them what they consider condign punishment for
being insane !

Why cannot their friends bestow upon them this " medical
treatment" at home, without the expense of sending them to
the Lunatic Asylum ?

This is the sum and substance of all the " treatment" they
get here, which they could not get at home — that is, they could
not get this treatment from reasonable friends, any where, out-
side of these inquisitorial institutions.

How doleful is this purgatory ! thus legally upheld for the
'punishment of the innocent ! Great God ! Is this Institution
located within the province of thy just government ? or is this
Satan's seat, that has net yet been subjected to thy Omnipo-
tent power ?

Mrs. Chene worth is only one among many, many others
which her case represents. During the few weeks she was in
my ward, after she first came, she was kindly treated. Per-
haps her own parents could not have done better by her, than
did Miss Tomlin and Miss McKelva, so far as their limited
powers extended.

They could not grant her that liberty and freedom she so
panted for, nor could they gratify her longings to see her own
offspring, and bestow upon them the love of her maternal
heart ; nor could they bring to her the sympathy of her fond
mother, for which she so ardently longed ; neither could they
summon to her side her husband — her chosen protector — who
had sworn before God never to forsake her in sickness or in
health, although it was her most earnest wish that he might
come and see her condition for himself.

No, neither of these influences could these attendants sum-

MRS. CHENE WORTH'S SUICIDE. 235

mon for her relief or benefit ; but so far as the ward duties
extended, they did as well by her as they could.

I never saw either of them get the least angry or impatient
towards her, although she tried them exceedingly by her an-
tics. They seemed to feel that instead of getting angry at an
insane person, they were placed here to " Bear the infirmities
of the weak, and not to please themselves."

I feel that they have nothing to dread in the revelations of
Mrs. Chene worth's Asylum discipline. Of each of them I
trust the Judge will say, " she hath done what she could" for
her suffering sister.

These attendants are highly cultivated, well developed wo-
men, who could enter into Mrs. Cheneworth's feelings, and
sympathize with her in her trials. They not only knew how
to treat her nature, but their principles controlled their feel-
ings, so that her trials might not be increased by any injudi-
cious act on their part. Neither did they seem to despise her
for being so sorely afflicted, but pitied and longed to help her.

Alas ! for poor Mrs. Chene worth ! her days for reasonable
treatment expired when she was removed to the lowest ward,
and consigned to the care of Elizabeth Bonner.

This attendant was a perfect contrast to her former attend-
ants in character, disposition, and habits. She was a large,
coarse, stout Irish woman, stronger than most men ; of quick
temper, very easily thrown off its balance, when, for the time
being, she would be a perfect demon, lost to all traces of hu-
manity. Her manners were very coarse and masculine, a
loud and boisterous talker, and a great liar, with no education,
and could neither read nor write.

To this vile, ignorant woman was Mrs. Chene worth entrusted,
to be treated just as her own feelings dictated.

Miss Bonner's first object was to " subdue her," that is, to
break down her aspiring feelings, and bring her into a state
of cringing submission to her dictation.

236 MODERN PERSECUTION.

Here was a contest between her naturally refined instincts,
and Miss Bonner's unrefined and coarse nature. Any mani-
festation of the lady-like nature of Mrs. Cheneworth, was met
by its opposite in Miss Bonner's servant-like nature and posi-
tion, and she must lord it over this gentle lady.

The position of the latter, as a boarder, must, at her beck,
be exchanged, by her being made to feel that she was nothing
but a slave and menial. If she ventured to remonstrate
against this wanton usurpation of authority over her, she
could only expect to receive physical abuse, such as she was
poorly able to bear.

And Oh ! the black tale of wrongs and cruel tortures this
tender woman experienced at the hand of this giant-like ty-
rant, no tongue or pen can ever describe !

She was choked, pounded, kicked, and plunged under water,
until well nigh strangled to death.

Mrs. Coe assured me this was only a specimen of the kind
of treatment all were liable to receive at her hands, since she
claimed that this was the way to cure them ! and this she in
sisted upon, was what she was put here to do.

Being strong, she was peculiarly adapted to her place, since
no woman or man could grapple with her successfully.

This is the attendant who so often made it her yboast that
Dr. McFarland let her do with the patients just as she chose
— that her judgment, her feelings, and her temper could be
trusted in all cases !

Oh ! what is there of injury and physical abuse that this
institution will not have to answer for, which has not been in-
flicted by brutal attendants— while Dr. McFarland has sus-
tained them by knowingly approving of these things ?

I do not believe the trustees would knowingly sustain these
brutalities. But Dr. McFarland's statements are regarded by
them as infallibly correct, and as he represents the treatment
here bestowed upon the patients, they doubtless feel confident

MRS. CHENE WORTH'S SUICIDE. 237

that they are humanely treated. But did they know what I
know, I believe they would disapprove of it, and not like Dr.
McFarland, try to cover it up, lest the interests of the insti-
tution be jeopardized by the investigation.

The facts I have already placed before them in a written
form, would of themselves arouse their interest and summon
their immediate investigation, did they not so implicitly rely
upon the Doctor's contradiction as proof of their fallacy !

In this way they are believing lies, and under this delusion
they are not only winking at iniquities, but publicly sustaining
them. It is in their power to ascertain the truth, did they feel
determined to know for themselves. But this investigation
would be attended with more trouble and inconvenience than
it is to let it go on, and thereby these slothful servants of the
public are justly held responsible for the sins of this house.

Poor Mrs. Cheneworth could not await this retribution, but
was driven to seek the only defence within her reach, death !
yes, death — the most dreadful of all evils — was chosen rather
than such a life as she was doomed to endure under the rule
of this Inquisition.

I cannot, no, I cannot blame her for killing herself. I do
not think God will blame her. She was like one who deliber-
ately rushed into the flames, to escape the barbed arrows of an
invincible foe. She only chose the quicker, rather than the
lingering, agonizing death, to which she seemed inevitably
doomed, at the hands of Elizabeth Bonner.

The last time I saw Mrs. Cheneworth was at the dance, after
which she hung herself, being found suspended from the upper
part of her window by the facing of her dress.

I never saw a person so changed. I did not know her when
Miss Bonner introduced me to her that evening. Such a hag-
gard look! such despair and wretchedness as her counte-
nance reflected, I have never witnessed. My feelings were
touched.

238 MODERN PERSECUTION.

I asked her to go with me, and putting my arm around her
waist, she walked with me across the ward to the window
looking South. Here we conversed confidentially, freely. She
said:

u0h! Mrs. Packard, I have suffered everything but death
since we were parted ! "

" But how has your face become so disfigured by sores, and
what causes your eyes to be so inflamed ? "

" I fainted, and fell down stairs, and they poured camphor
so profusely jover my face, and into my eyes and ears, that I
have, in consequence, been blind and deaf for some time."

I do not know whether her chin, which was red and raw,
was thus caused or not. She said the fall had caused her to
miscarry, and thus, thought I, you have had to bear this
burden in addition to the load of sorrows already heaped upon
your tender, weak person. Said I :

" Have you any hope of getting out of this place — of ever
being taken to your friends ? "

" No ! none at all ! Hopeless, endless torment is all that is
before me ! Oh, if I could only get out of this place, I would
walk to my father's house. It is only fourteen miles south,
here," pointing out of the window, " but Oh, these iron bars !
I cannot escape through them."

How I did pity her ! But I could only say, as I do to
others :

" Do try to be patient as you can ; for I do hope this house
will not long stand, and that in its destruction, we may be de-
livered out of this place of torment."

I had no other tangible hope to offer her drooping heart,
already deadly sick from hope too long deferred. She said :

" I wish I could get into the ward with you ; I will ask Dr.
McFarland, to-morrow, to remove me there."

" Alas ! " thought I, " no request of yours will be heeded, as
a source of relief to you ; for it is not to relieve, but to torment

MRS. CHENEWORTH'S SUICIDE. 239

you, that you are kept here. Could I but inform your parents
of their dear daughter's sad fate, surely they would come to
your rescue."

Then I thought of the letter I had sent to Mrs. Timmons'
friends in her behalf, and how, like deaf adders, they would
not hear, or would not believe my statements, unless endorsed
by Dr. McFarland. I turned away, sick at heart, at sight of
woes I could not mitigate or remove.

Oh, when will the prisoner's bonds be loosed and the lawful
captive be delivered ?

Notwithstanding, I think I offered to intercede for her, while,
at the same time, I knew it would be utterly fruitless, as I
have so often tried reason, argument and entreaty, only to find
it useless.

" Yes, sister, I cannot but congratulate you on what I be-
lieve to be your happy exchange ; for I do not think you can
find, in all the universe, a worse place of torment than you
found here. May'st thou find that rest in death that was
denied thee on earth.

CHAPTER XXXIV. *

Changes and how brought about.

After occupying the old Eighth ward about a year, we were
all summarily ordered to move into the new Eighth. During
the summer of 1861, this new and airy part of the building-
was my home, although the patients were not materially
changed in character.

Again, in the last of the autumn, we were all removed into
the old Seventh. Now the class of patients was changed to a
more quiet class, and some of them, like Mrs. Timmons, sane
and intelligent. Besides, we were now taking our meals in
the dining-room of the new Seventh — the class of prisoners
with whom I associated the first four months.

I felt that I was in the region of the intelligent world again,
for part of the occupants of the new Seventh, were iust as
sane as most boarding school girls, pr hotel boarders, generally.
I seldom saw anything here, that would, outside of an Asylum,
be considered insanity, or anything like it.

I can assure my reader that I was fully prepared to appre-
ciate a return to civilized society, and this change was, there-
fore, to me a harbinger of good things. I could talk with my
old associates at the other table, while at the table, and our
fare and table arrangements were much alike now, which, of
course, was a great improvement on our former style.

I was allowed a good room by myself, and this being the
first time for one year this privilege was granted, I had much
to be thankful for.

Another change affecting my prison life, took place about
two months after Miss Lynch obtained permission to take me
to. ride, which occasioned the prison doors to be closed entirely
upon me.

CHANGES HOW BROUGHT ABOUT. 241

I felt it to be my duty to enter a protest against my imprison-
ment, and in doing so, asked Dr. Sturtevant, our Chaplain,
to be my witness in the reception-room.

It was Sabbath, after chapel service that I went to him and
asked him to meet me in the reception-room.

He consented, and we parted, he going down with Dr.
McFarland and Dr. Tenny one flight of stairs, while I went
down the opposite. When about two-thirds of the way down,
Dr. McFarland met me; and seizing my arm, ordered me back
to my ward. I remained motionless. He then applied force,
saying:

" Have you no feet ?"

" I have no feet to walk into prison with."

He then tried to drag me back. But when he saw Dr.
Sturtevant looking at us, he let go his hold of my arm, and I
dropped from his grasp upon the floor below.

He followed, and passed me without speaking, and joined Dr.
Sturtevant and Dr. Tenny, where, after a short consultation,
they passed down stairs, while I still sat upon the floor.

The fall had so stunned me, that for a few moments I hardly
knew whether I could rise or not, but when I saw the three
men who ought to be my protectors, and helpers, under such
circumstances forsake me, I began to try my powers of self-
dependence, and found I could not only raise myself, but could
also stand alone too, without a man to lean upon !

Strong in my own self-reliant strength, I hastened to meet
my appointment with our chaplain in the reception-room below,
but found no one there.

Nothing daunted by this failure on Dr. Sturtevant' s part, I
walked into the office and met the whole trio there.

But for some unknown cause, Dr. McFarland seemed un-
willing to face me, but, coward like, shall I- say ? fled out of
my presence.

The other two gentlemen did not run away, but looked me full
11

242 MODERN PERSECUTION.

in the face, while I entered my protest in the following lan-
guage:

" I have a right to my liberty ! No law in the United States
holds me legally imprisoned ! I assert this right — I shall never
return a voluntary prisoner to my cell !"

Turning to Dr. McFarland, who now stood in the door-way,
I said :

" You, Dr. McFarland, have might to put me there, but no
right. I assert my rights from principle. I believe God re-
quires me to take this stand. I am immovable in my purpose.
You can carry me to the ward with the help of two of your
men, and I have no one to defend me against this power. I
shall offer no resistance to physical force. Use it if you dare !
You do so at your peril."

Then handing him a letter, I said :

" I request you to stamp and mail this business letter, un-
read to my son. This step is preparatory to a legal defence of
my rights at the bar of my country.

Then turning to Dr. Sturtevant, I said :

" Will you, Sir, stand my witness that I now assert my rights,
and therefore, am henceforth an involuntary prisoner here ?"

He replied, " I am your witness."

" Now, Sir, my business with you is done, unless you wish
to witness my forced return to my ward."

The carriage had been some time waiting for him at the
door, therefore after asking me to excuse him, he left.

Dr. McFarland then said, " Are you going to compel us to
put you back into the ward ?"

" I shall never return a voluntary prisoner to my cell."

" Then I must get a porter to take you back."

And he went for his porter, and soon returned with a strong
burly Irishman, Mr. Bonner, to whom he said :

" I want you to take this lady up to the Eighth ward, she
don't seem disposed to walk back."

CHANGES HOW BROUGHT ABOUT. 243

He then took me up in his arms, but finding my weight too
much for him, I suggested that they take me on a chair, and
Dr. Tenny take hold with him.

This plan worked well, and I was therefore transported up
two flights of stairs in this manner, preceded by the Doctor,
who unlocked the prison door to receive the prisoner — and no
one could ever after say that I was a voluntary prisoner in
Jacksonville Insane Asylum ; for from that time I never re-
turned a voluntary prisoner to my ward.

I never regretted taking this step, as now I had done all I
could do to get my liberty, and having entered my protest, I
was thus exonerated from all responsibility, as in any way a
willing accomplice in the conspiracy.

There is one point in connection with this transaction,
worthy of note — that is, that my falling down stairs as I did,
is, in Dr. McFarland's estimation, evidence of insanity in me ;
and he also maintains that this is the only insane act he de-
tected in me, during all my three years' imprisonment !

Now, I think there was more evidence of insanity in Dr.
McFarland's conduct in this transaction, than there was in
mine. He ought not to have left one of his patients in my
condition, until he had so much as inquired whether I could
raise myself or not. He did not know but my bones were so
broken that I could not get up.

I think the Doctor's conduct was ungentlemanly to say the
least, to treat a sane lady like myself, in this manner, and even
if I had been insane, it would have been no excuse for this un-
manly conduct towards one whom he claimed as his patient.

The final change I experienced, was in being removed from
the old Seventh to the old Eighth again, after having enjoyed
the privileges of civilized society for a few weeks. This, my
second consignment to the maniac's ward, was in the follow-
ing manner, as I find it recorded in my journal.

CHAPTER XXXV.

My Battle With Despotism— No
Surrender.

The Doctor has to-day assigned me again to the Eighth ward,
against my wishes. Since entering my protest against prison
life, no rule of the honse is binding upon my conscience.

Still, hitherto I have thought it best to break none in open
defiance of " the powers that be," only by getting paper and
pencils, when and where I could, and in sending letters by my
" Underground Express."

But this unreasonable sentence or mandate I felt conscience-
bound to resist, and I have done so from settled principle.

I claim the right of a reasonable being, to be influenced in
and through my reason, and henceforth, throughout my
whole life, am fully resolved to resist all dictation, coming in
the form of despotic mandates in defiance of reason.

My first battle with despotism was now to be fought in re-
sistance to this unreasonable command. Had the Doctor given
me one reason why he wished me returned to the maniac's ward,
I would have been satisfied to obey his command, even if I did
not see the propriety of his reason. But he did not, even when
I asked for one. The facts were these :

One day, after quietly enjoying my new surroundings for a
few short weeks, the Doctor came to my room and in a very
quiet, pleasant tone remarked :

" Mrs. Packard, I have given your letter to Mr. Russell, and
the reply will depend upon him and his decision.

" Thank you, Dr. McFarland."

He then said :

" Mrs. Packard, I have been making new arrangements — I
have fitted up the ward above you clean and nice, and I am to

BATTLE WITH DESPOTISM. 245

occupy it with a quiet class of patients, with Miss Smith and
Miss Baily for attendants ; I have thought it best to have you
go and occupy the room above yours. "

That room was a screen-room. I replied :

" I did request to go to the new Eighth, to my airy, corner
room, that I might have the benefit of purer air, since I am
now so closely confined within doors, but I do not wish to go
into the ward you assign me, because Miss Smith is a cruel
attendant, and I am becoming so extremely sensitive to wrong
and abuse, that I cannot, and shall not witness it without
interference, even if you put me into fetters for it."

" Perhaps you might benefit her — do her good."

" Perhaps I might — I have thought of that — still, I feel
that I owe a duty to myself, also."

Here he passed on, simply remarking :

"I have decided to have you go."

" And I have decided not to go ! It will be merely an act
of brute force on your part that puts me there. It is a
requirement of despotism, and I am conscience-bound to
resist it."

Mrs. Page, one of the sane prisoners, said to me when the
Doctor was out of hearing :

" It is your duty to yield to despotism, if it is Beelzebub
himself who issues the command, if it comes in man form !"

But Mrs. Page and LdifTer in opinion on that point. I agree
to yield to reason everywhere — to despotism nowhere.

The attendants from the Eight ward soon called for me. I
declined going, and related the above conversation with the
Doctor. Miss Smith replied :

" I do not abuse the patients — the charge is a false one."

" I hope that I have been misinformed. Miss Clauson says
she thinks you are trying to do as well as you know how, and I
hope you have improved. Mrs. McFarland told me she disliked
the way you treated the patients, and she wished you were

246 MODERN PERSECUTION.

away ; but she added, ' she is good to the sick, and 1 wish to
give her all the credit she deserves.' But should we be together,
I can assure you, I shall be a true friend to you — I shall respect
and honor your conscience — I shall defend the abused and the
wronged everywhere, whether attendant or patient."

" We shall not, of course, force you to go with us."

And they went to report me to the Doctor.

Next, Dr. Tenny was sent, to try what influence he could
have over me. I told him that :

" I cannot see why the Doctor cannot treat me as gentle-
manly as he has of late begun to treat the maniacs, in asking
them civilly, whether they were willing to go to another ward ;
and he has, to my knowledge, left it to their own wishes to
decide this question. I know this is a great progressive step
for him to take in the right direction, but why should I be
singled out just now as an exception to this new era of events ?
Despotism is making another attack for mastery over his
better nature, and he ought to be restrained, for he has no
moral right to rule responsible moral agents, except through
their reason. For his good, as well as my own, I shall never
submit to this rule over me in any other manner."

Dr. Tenny replied, " He cannot be governed by the wishes
of the patients. It is my opinion you had better go."

" It is my opinion I had better not go. So we differ in
opinion here."

Mrs. McFarland next came, and tried to influence me to go
voluntarily. I remained firm.

Many of my friends about the house, and my companions
in the new Seventh ward tried to induce me to give up to the
Doctor, and as I gave my reasons to one Mrs. Farnside, she
remarked : " Well, suffer it to be so now."

About eleven o'clock the next day, Dr. McFarland with two
of his porters, entered my room while I was packing my trunk
to be transported. The Doctor very politely asked :

BATTLE WITH DESPOTISM. 247

" Mrs. Packard, will you go up to the Eighth ward your-
self?"

" No, sir ! I refuse from principle. I regard your order
as an act of despotism, which I cannot conscientiously coun-
tenance. "

" Yery well," and turning to the porters he said :
" You take this lady up very gently, and carefully, don't
hurt her, and carry her to her room."

" Thank you, Doctor, for your kind cautions to handle me
gently, for I am not as well as usual to-day, although better
than I was early this morning. Can I finish packing my
trunk?"

" Yes, Oh, yes, certainly. Your things shall be taken
care of."

At my suggestion, the porters then formed a " saddle-seat "
with their hands, upon which I sat, with my hands upon their
shoulders, and thus they transported me very gently and safely
to the upper ward, followed by the Doctor, and preceded by
Miss Gerta De La Hay.

When within the limits of the ward, I said to my guard :
" I can walk now — I will not burden you any further."
I then thanked them for carrying me so gently, and turn
ing to Dr. McFarland I inquired :

" Can these men bring up my trunk ? "
" Yes, certainly, you shall have all your things."
The Doctor was true to his word — all my things were
removed with me to this ward.

As the Doctor left with his porter, I remarked to my
attendants :

" The Doctor can do a mean thing in the most alert gentle-
manly manner possible. But I was determined to be a match
for him in playing ' the lady ' as far as he did ' the gentleman.'
His manner reminds me of Mrs. Waldo's remark, ' do the thing
in a Christian spirit, and all will be right ! ' But I think it is

248 MODERN PERSECUTION.

as impossible to do any wicked act in a Christian spirit as it
would be to murder or steal with a Christian spirit. Now I am
under your care, and I have not sinned in coming, for the act
was not mine, but Dr. McFarland's, therefore, I hope to enjoy
the smiles of an approving conscience, here as well as else-
where. Will you now introduce me to my new associates ? "

Miss Bailey replied, " Mrs. Packard, I do not think there
is a patient in this hall who can answer a rational question
in a rational manner."

u I will not trouble you then to introduce me. Where is
my room ? "

She then showed me the screen-room the Doctor had as-
signed me.

My attendants were amazed at this appointment, and insisted
there must be a mistake.

But I told them this was the room above mine, and I should
obey his orders in taking it.

But before my carpet was cleaned and brought, Miss Smith
had inquired of the Doctor why he had given me a screen-
room, when the astonished Doctor said he did not know it
was a screen-room, and directed her to let me have my choice
ot all the rooms in the hall. I accordingly chose a pleasant
front room, which I occupied until I was discharged. I was
allowed one favor here which had before been scrupulously
denied me, during my prison life, and that was to have the
liberty of closing the door of my room in the day time.

I was never locked in my room nights, by any attendant
after I had a room by myseli. This, too, was a rare favor.

As the Doctor has said, he had a quiet class of patients in
this hall, so that with my closed door, I had a nice quiet place
to write " The Great Drama," which was written in this room.

The way in which this came to be written will appear in
its proper place.

I am now quietly settled in my new quarters. My prospects

BATTLE WITH DESPOTISM. 249

for quiet, rest and study, were never brighter. So true it is,
that good comes out of seeming evil. The darkest providen-
ces are often the stepping-stone to prospective good.

I have indeed been crucified again. The cross upon which
I have been hung, although by some is regarded with con-
tempt, yet like the scars the noble soldiers receive in battles,
for the defence of their country, is yet to be looked upon in
its true light.

I have had a battle against the rule of despotism here— I
did not surrender, neither was I conquered.

Though the thing aimed at was accomplished, yet the power
of despotism here is weakened more by the triumph than it
could have been by the defeat.

Miss Mattie Shelton, one of my attendants in the old Seventh
said to me :

" I can't blame you for doing as you do, we are all ruled
with rigor here."

" It is true that all who will submit to be trod upon, will
surely be thus subjected. I shall stand upon my own self-de-
fence, and so must all who stand here. I hope Dr. McFarland
will never try to govern an intelligent woman with force again.

Miss Johnston, attendant in the new Seventh, says :

" Mrs. Packard, you are strong both in mind and body, so
you can bear this crucifixion better than a weaker subject
could."

" If I can help woman by suffering in her stead, I will re-
joice in my sorrows."

11*

CHAPTER XXXVI. v

Reading Books and Papers.

There is a library connected with this Institution, which
the public designed for the use of the patients, and there are
a large number of papers generously sent to the Institution as
a free-will offering for their benefit.

But it is due to the public and the patrons who bestow these
gifts so kindly, that it should be known that these books and
papers very seldom find their way to the prisoners in the
wards.

Even while I was an occupant of the Seventh ward, it was
with great difficulty I could get either ; and while in the Eighth,
it was almost impossible for me to get one, except clandes-
tinely and by strategy. And were it not for the special kind-
ness of Dr. Tenny, Mr. and Mrs. Coe, and Mrs. Hosmer, I
should have been left to famish from mental starvation.

It was war time, too, when daily events of the most thrilling
kind were occurring, and I felt it to be a great privation to be
deprived of the news of the war.

Among my Asylum papers I find a copy of a letter I handed
to Dr. Sturtevant, one day after chapel service, wherein my
feelings upon this point are portrayed as follows :

Dr. Sturtevant : Dear Brother in Christ. — Entombed alive,
as I am at present, I, as an intelligent being, suffer greatly from
being deprived of all communication with the world outside
this Asylum, so far as Dr. McFarland can prevent it ; and fully
believing that you, kind Brother, " suffer as bound with me,"
I venture to ask of you an expression of this sympathy, by
furnishing me with the reading of the Independent, weekly,
by bringing it to me, on each Sabbath, when I will exchange
the previous one.

READING BOOKS AND PAPERS. 251

Did you but know how I long to keep informed of what is
transpiring now in my country, at this eventful crisis, I know
you would pity me ; and not scruple to grant so reasonable a
request, of an afflicted sister in bonds. Still, I will not mur-
mur if you turn me off with an excuse, rather than grant my
request ; for I know that God rules in the hearts of men, and
" He turneth them whithersoever He will ; " and I have long
schooled myself to submission to all God's appointments, as
providence develops His wishes.

Since I am suffering for conscience sake alone, I see no pros-
pect, on the natural plane, but that it will necessarily be life
long, since I never can relinquish my right to " obey God
rather than man," when I know these mandates conflict. So
long as I will not take man's judgment instead of my con-
science for my guide, I must remain inprisoned in this Asylum !
And yet, this is free America !

Yes, Dr. Sturtevant, I fully believe that my country will not
prosper, so long as woman is suffered to be thus treated. But
so far as I am concerned, " all is well." Nothing can harm
me. God is my only trust and shield. Fear not for your
sister in bonds, although her persecutions almost daily increase
in intensity.

By the help of your prayers and those of God's faithful
ones in my behalf, I shall be ultimately delivered out of the
hands of my sagacious enemies. By faith I stand. Through
God I shall do valiantly. I shall trust God by doing right,
and thus wait his deliverance.

Your sister in bonds,

E. P. W. Packaed.

To the discredit of Dr. Sturtevant, the honored President of
Illinois College, and that of the sacred profession of the min-
istry whom he represents, I am sorry to add that he took no
notice of my requests, not even so much as to give me any
excuse for not lending me his Independent to read !

252 MODERN PERSECUTION.

The letter shows what confidence I then had in his Christian
character, and in his manliness as being " woman's friend."
And it was a trne index of my feelings towards that class, who
profess to be the ministers of our holy religion, and the prac-
tical followers of that Master, whose cause they pledge to de-
fend as their chosen profession.

Therefore, as a sister in need, I, of course, expected a
Christian response to my appeal to one of this class especially.
But lo ! " ye did it not," must certainly be said of this man,
among this revered profession.

This incident has taught me that it is not the profession
which makes the man, but it is the manner in which its duties
are performed and its high responsibilities are discharged,
which is to determine the standard of merit among ministers,
as well as men in other professions.

In short, ministers must be judged by the same standard as
other men — they must stand or fall upon their own individual
actions, not upon their position or profession.

Another lesson taught me by this incident and its subsequent
events, was, that if we do right, we shall feel right ; if we do
wrong, we shall feel wrong. So long as this our " chaplain "
treated me as a man and a Christian, he felt like a man and
a Christian towards me. But just as soon as he forsook this
standard of action, his feelings forsook this. standard.

He began to treat me unsympathizingly — he began to feel
cold towards me ; and the more he manifested this coldness
the more unsympathizing and unfeeling he became.

Thus he closed up the avenues to his warm, manly heart, by
his own heartless actions, or rather inaction, which, if con-
tinued sufficiently long, will inevitably ossify this noble heart,
which was made to reflect Christ's own image.

But Mr. J. C. Coe, finding how I was situated, very mag-
nanimously took a St. Louis daily paper for the express purpose
of supplying me with the news, and Mrs. Coe, his wife, daily

READING BOOKS AND PAPERS. 253

brought it to me under her apron ; so that it was not known
at headquarters how I obtained my knowledge of passing
events, any more than how I passed out my letters.

Dr. Tenny also kindly brought me the Independent weekly,
which he took at his own expense, and for the purpose, as he
said, of accomodating some of his friends in the asylum.

Mrs. Hosmer also, occasionally, brought me some of her
papers, and by a special permission from Dr. McFarland, at
times, some of her own books to read, on the subject of
Swedenborgianism .

Why the Doctor wished to deprive his prisoners of this relief
and amusement, is a mystery I could never fathom. I some-
times thought it was to increase their mental torment, that he
thus heartlessly denied them this right the State had granted.

I have heard intelligent patients beg and plead with him to
bring them a paper or a book to read, while he would pass
speechlessly on, seeming not to hear a word they were address-
ing to him. This indifferent manner would sometimes arouse
the indignation of the petitioners to such a pitch that they
would heap curses upon him after he left, often affirming :
" He comes to the wards for nothing else but to torment us !"

But I am happy to say, that during a favored period of my
prison life, he not only allowed me to read Dr. Channing's
works, but I think he has exchanged the volumes for me him-
self, and once he brought me one of his own volumes of Shak-
speare's works.

I noticed in a Chicago paper of January 14, 1*868, Dr . Mc-
Farland advertises for books to be sent to the institution
for the benefit of the patients.

I think if the public knew how indifferent he feels in rela-
tion to the wants and comforts of his patients, they would not
be over anxious to stock their library with books while Dr.
McFarland was the State Librarian.

CHAPTER XXXVn.

Abusing Mrs. Stanley.

My worst fears respecting the management of this ward, I
am sorry to say, were fully realized. Miss Smith possessed
naturally a very quick temper, and having it aroused, by ward
scenes, into a most unhealthy exercise for many months, she
had now become extremely irritable and cross also, so that
her atmosphere was anything but salutary and pleasant to the
patients under her charge.

Indeed, the contrast between her management and the quiet,
kind and gentle influence of Miss Tomlin, and her associate,
Miss McKelva, was truly painful, and to me a return to the
old system of punishment and abuse, was rendered doubly so,
after so long a cessation of hostilities.

Had I been removed from the asylum instead of to this
ward, I should have felt confident in the pleasing hope that a
reform had really been inaugurated, when I now see that it
was only local and spasmodic in its extent and nature.

My feelings were first hurt in witnessing Mrs. Stanley's
abuse. She is a high spirited quick tempered lady, about
thirty-five years of age, the mother of several children. She
had been delicately reared, of aristocratic feelings, and unac-
customed to labor, except that of the superintendence of her
servants and nursery. Indulged and gratified herself, she
had not learned how to have her wishes crossed, and maintain
at the same time her equanimity.

One day Miss Smith ordered her off her bed, in terms so
stern and authoritative, that it aroused the invalid's temper,
and she remonstrated, and claimed the need she felt of lying
upon her bed on account of sickness.

The argument was regarded by Miss Smith as a justifiable

ABUSIMG MRS. STANLEY. 255

reason for laying violent hands upon her, and pulling her sud-
denly from her bed upon the floor, when, as usual, a fight
commenced, and Miss Bailey was summoned to assist Miss
Smith in " subduing " Mrs. Stanley !

After fighting awhile, Mrs. Stanley constantly ordering them
to let her alone, they concluded to try the " cold bath " to
" subdue " her.

Fearing and dreading this punishment more than all others,
she, in the most reasonable manner, urged the soundest logic
against it, in her present state of health, and then begged
and prayed that, for her health's sake, if nothing else, they
would spare her this exposure. She said :

" Miss Smith, I am sorry ! I ask your pardon ! Oh, do
forgive me ! pray do, I won't do so again."

Still they persisted, regardless of her entreaties, confessions
and prayers.

I went to the bath room, hoping my presence might restrain
them, and I begged them to forgive her.

But they would not.

After pouring a pail of cold water on her head, Mrs. Stanley
said:

" Won't you now kiss me ? "

" No ! " said Miss Smith, " I won't kiss those who will talk
as you do."

Here I said, " do forgive her ! for you will sometime want
forgiveness yourself."

She then stopped with the threat :

" If you speak another word you shall not have one mouth-
ful of food all day ! "

Miss Smith then turned to me saying :

"lam not going to take abusive language from a patient !"

In a low tone I replied :

" You must remember, she is insane, and you cannot ex-
pect her to do as a sane person would."

256 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" She is not as insane, as she pretends to be — she knows
how to behave better, and I will not bear abuse from her ! "

" We sane ones ought to bear more than we can expect
them to bear," I replied.

Another incident connected with the fight. Mrs. Kinney,
a very sympathetic patient, seeing how Mrs. Stanley was being
misused, interfered, and pulled Miss Smith off. Here was
another severe tight, which resulted in forcing Mrs. Kinney
into a side room, and locking her up.

After all the fighting was over, Miss Bailey, looking at her
finger, remarked :

" I don't know but my finger is broken."

I thought " if you inquired if you had broken any of the
patient's bones, it would be becoming."

Thus this weak, delicate woman, who was placed here to
receive kind, humane treatment, as the laws direct, is thus al-
lowed to be abused, her own health and nerves to suffer per-
haps an irreparable injury, from those from whom it is impos-
sible to escape ; and wrongs from which there is no redress,
since all the witnesses are outlawed by the brand of insanity :

The oppressed find in this ward no comforter, except it be
in defiance of the reigning powers. I have, and do still, defy
them, so far as to try to comfort the broken hearted, to sym-
pathize with them in their sorrows, and these are the evidences
of my insanity which call for my protracted martyrdom !

There is no necessity for abusing a patient. I have seen
both systems tried, abuse and kindness ; and kindness is by
far the easiest, safest course.

And besides, these patients are the boarders of the house,
and the attendants are the hired servants, and this distinction
ought to be recognized as an inspiring feeling of respect at-
tending the patient's welfare.

Kind attendants, sometimes get abuse from maniacs, but
feeling required to " bear the infirmities of the weak," they

ABUSING MRS. STANLEY. 257

never feel justified in returning abuse for abuse, " Dut contra-
wise blessings." They soothe and calm, where the irritable
attendant excites into the heat of passion.

Under Mrs. De La Hay's reign of injustice, I have seen the
forbearance and magnanimity evinced, operate to inflame her
malignity, and have heard her even twit them with imbecility
and weakness, thus calling these heroic virtues, " their in-
sanity ! "

When she would provoke them into a manifestation of re-
sentment, she would exult, as if she was now justified in
abusing to any extent, because they are insane !

CHAPTER XXXVHL

Subduing a New Prisoner.

One night I was aroused from nry slumbers by the screams
of a new patient, who was entered in my hall. The welcome
she received from her keepers, Miss Smith and Miss Bailey, so
frightened her, that she supposed they were going to kill her.

Therefore, for screaming under these circumstances, they
forced her into- a screen-room and locked her up. Still fear-
ing the worst, she continued to call for " Help ! " Instead of
attempting to soothe and quiet her fears, they simply com-
manded her to stop screaming.

But failing to obey their order, they then seized her vio-
lently and dragged her to the bath-room, where they plungea
her into the bath-tub ol cold water.

This shock so convulsed her in agony that she now screamed
louder than belore. They then drowned her voice by strangu-
lation, by holding her under the water until nearly dead.

When she could speak, she plead in the most piteous tones
for "Help! Help!"

But all in vain. The only response was " Will you scream
any more ? "

She promised she would not, but to make it a thorough
" subduing," they plunged her several times after she had
made them this promise ! My room was directly opposite with
open ventilators over both doors, I could distinctly hear all.

This is what they call giving the patient a " good bath ! "

But the bewildered, frightened stranger, finds it hard to see
the " good " part of it. The patient was then led, wet and
shivering, to her room, and ordered to bed, with the threat :

"It you halloo again, we shall give you another bath."

The night was very cold, and I lay under my winter's

SUBDUING A NEW PRISONER. 259

amount of bed-clothes to keep me comfortable, while this shiv-
ering girl was allowed only a sheet and one thin blanket to
cover her.

She told me next morning that she lay almost frozen all
night, and complained of universal soreness for many days
after. For a long time I could see black and blue spots all
over her body, caused by this violent handling of her tender
frame, in putting her through the process of initiation — " the
subduing."

The next morning I was awakened by hearing Miss Smith
reprimand her most sternly for wanting her shoes, which she
could not find. Instead of trying to pacify her, she forced
her shoeless patient to the bath-room, and held her head under
the streaming faucet !

The frightened one screamed for " Help ! "

For she had not yet learned the sad truth, that she was out
of the reach of all human " help," now that she had passed
the fatal " dead-lock" of a charitable State institution.

She kept calling for her shoes. Miss Smith had promised
them to her after she had washed. This being done, she called
for her shoes. Now Miss Smith required her hair to be first
combed, and having obeyed this order also, she again called
for her shoes.

At this point, my feelings drove me to the spot, to defend
the rights of the stranger, where I found Miss Smith, with
upraised hands over her victim, ordering her to " Stop ! "

I whispered in Miss Smith's ear :

" I would get her shoes for her."

She turned angrily upon me, and said :

" I shall not be interfered with ! I know what I am about —
I haven't seen her shoes — I know nothing about them."

I left, and went to breakfast. Soon after, Miss Smith came
in with her unhappy, shoeless patient, and ordered her to sit
down and eat her breakfast. The patient wanted her shoes
first, but no request of hers was noticed.

260 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" You may eat or not, just as you choose," said Miss Smith,
as her only reply to her inquiry for her shoes.

This was her first meal among this great crowd of strangers
in this strange place. I could not help pitying this friendless
one, and passing her on my return from the dining-room, put
my arm around her waist, and kindly invited her to come to
my room, telling her, at the same time, that I would be a
friend to her, and treat her kindly.

She replied, " That is all I want."

I told her I would ask the attendants to find her shoes —
that it was their duty to attend to her wants, and keep all her
clothing safe for her.

Her neck was cold, as her dress was very low, and she had
lost her cape. I sought for it in her room, but not finding it,
asked the attendants for it, but they said that they knew
nothing about it. I then lent this shivering girl a sacque of
my own, and invited her to sit down in my room, upon my
trunk, which I had covered with a cushioned top for a seat
for my guests. She seemed rejoiced to have found a friend,
and clung to me as to her last hope. She would not leave
me without a promise that she might return. She said her
father told her she should have all she wanted when she got
here, and would see a great many nice things.

" But all I want is to be treated kindly."

I told her I thought the attendants would soon look for her
things — that they had many to look after — that we must try
to be patient.

She waited several hours ; again her lost shoes began to
trouble her, as she wished to go out, if I would accompany
her ; and if she might return again to my room. I offered
to lend her a pair, and had just handed them to her, when
Miss Bailey came in with the missing shoes and cape.

■ The other patients were now going to walk, and she wished
to go too, but Miss Smith decidedly refused; saying :

SUBDUING A NEW PRISONER. 261

"I think it is best you should not go."

I tried to relieve her disappointment, by telling her :

" I presume they choose to wait a few days, to see how you
behave. They may fear you will try to run away now; and
besides, you have not rested from your long journey in the
cars, and they think it better that you keep quiet a few days."

She seemed easily satisfied, and remarked :

" I presume the bath will do me good, but I hope I shall not
need another. If ever I have to take another bath, won't you
be with me?"

She said she thought that was baptism ; she had now been
twice baptized — once in a creek, and now by these two women !

She often complained of being hungry. I went to Miss
Bailey, and asked her if I might take her key and go to the
dining-room closet, and get her some bread and butter, as the
By-laws allow the patients a piece between meals, if they need it.

Miss Bailey went and got some herself.

This was a very rare favor. Indeed, in all of my Asylum
life I never knew it done in any other instance. The truth is,
these By-Laws are merely By-Lies — worse than none at all — ■
for they delude the credulous public into the belief that human
kindness must be the inevitable result of such a humane code
of By-Laws. Whereas, there being no link to connect the
patients with the laws of our country, their rights ■ may be
ignored to any extent with impunity. These By-Laws are sim-
ply a dead letter when tested in their application to the patient's
interests.

I devoted the day to her comfort and amusement, and she
seemed, before night, to. be quite cheerful and contented. She
was uniformly quiet and peaceable, and disposed to do the best
in her power.

I am fully satisfied that the scene in the bath-room was en-
tirely owing to mismanagement on the part of the attendants.
There is never any occasion for fighting a patient. The State

262 MODERN PERSECUTION.

has furnished a screen-room for the restraint of the pugnacious
ones, and the room should be used for only such and at such
times as they need restraint.

Another initiating process. Miss Smith said she thought
she should be obliged to cut off her hair, since she had " creep-
ers," in it. The patient did not wish to lose her fine hair, and
I remonstrated against it, saying that I thought she had no
right to do so without her own or her friend's consent, for
they always felt bad to find it had been done, when they had
recovered. Besides, the Institution furnishes ointment for the
evil she deplored.

I made a thorough investigation myself, and found no cause
for the excuse she gave for cutting her hair. I found the
reason she wished it shingled, was to save her the trouble of
combing it.

She yielded to my appeal, and thus was the long black hair
of this young lady saved to her, by my interposition.

I had given my word to this lonely one, that she should find
in me a friend, not knowing what disaster to my own interests
might be the result. But, since I have nothing to lose, but
my life, I am willing to risk it in defence of the oppressed
and down-trodden.

I will simply dare to do my duty, remembering Christ's word,
that if " I am ashamed of him and his words, he will be
ashamed of me." I never was in any place where Christ's
principles were so ignored and contemned as in this doleful
prison house.

I have detailed this single case as a type of others of daily
and almost hourly occurrence here, the bare mention of which
would fill a volume.

CHAPTER XXXIX.

Treatment of the Sick.

I had for my dormitory companion for more than one year,
Miss Emily Goldsby, who was sadly afflicted with epileptic fits.
It was for this she was sent to this Asylum for treatment, and
for this purpose she consented to come. But like all other
similar expectations, this hope went out in utter darkness,
under her Asylum experience.

Her mental faculties had already become somewhat impaired,
in consequence of these fits, and both she and her friends,
fondly hoped that under the medical treatment of the far-famed
Dr. McFarland, the cause of this aberration might be mitiga-
ted, or removed.

But she had scarcely anything done for her by way of med-
ical treatment, although I often heard her intercede with the
Doctor, either to do something to cure her, or send her home
to her friends.

But he could not be prevailed upon to do either, so that she
lingered out a most wretched imprisonment of many years,
uncared for and apparently forgotten.

Her friends thus finding it was easier to be relieved of the
care of her, than to take care of her themselves, when at last
they were obliged to take her away, they cast her into a county
house !

She not only received no treatment for her disease, but no
care even when she had her fits, except what I gave her.

One night, before I could get to her bed, she fell to the
floor in one of her fits, and broke her collar bone. This acci-
dent caused her much suffering, and she daily appealed
to the Doctor for relief; but he would turn silently away with-
out seeming to hear her. I finally influenced Dr. Tenny to

264 MODERN PERSECUTION.

look at it, and see for himself that she had need of medical
help. He was satisfied that the bone was fractured, and sent
her some liniment which . relieved her pain.

She had, at several different times, periods of unusual ir-
regularity of conduct, so that she could not sleep for several
nights in succession, nor could her room-mate sleep with her.
I was her constant and only watcher and nurse during the
whole year, including these periods.

Once, after several sleepless nights, I said to Dr. McFarland :

"lam willing to do my share of hospital nursing, but I am
not willing to sacrifice my health in this cause, and therefore,
I wish you would make some change for a few nights, at least,
so that I may get a little sleep."

But he passed on without making any reply whatever, leav-
ing me to quiet my patient as best I could, and get my own
sleep where I could find it, or go without it if I could not.

There was another lady in our hall who needed medical treat-
ment, for a weakness which caused her attendants some trouble
about her bed ; and although over sixty years of age, she was
punished for it as if she were a child, instead of being medi-
cated as she needed.

She was lady-like, intelligent, perfectly submissive, and uni-
formly quiet. She was always neatly and genteelly dressed,
and had I met her outside of an insane asylum, I should
never have had a suspicion of her being an insane person ; I .
never saw anything like insanity in her. This lady had to be
punished daily, morning after morning, with the horrors of
the plunge bath, because she caused her attendants trouble
about her bed. She was not to blame for causing them this
trouble, for she could not help it.

She used to come to my room after these death-like stran-
gulations by water and say :

" Oh ! Mrs. Packard, I thought they would kill me this morn-
ing ! I only wish I had died, for now I am only spared to go

TREATMENT OF THE SICK. 265

through it again to-morrow, for I can't help it. I lie awake
all the time I possibly can for fear, but sleep will overcome me,
and then I am guilty of 5 an insane act,' as they call it, for
which there is no escape from this terrible punishment."

I reported her case to her married daughter who visited her.
But she took no notice of this defence of her mother's rights,
but left her defenceless as ever, to the tender mercy of the
Superintendent, in whom she expressed the most unbounded
confidence !

This daughter's visit to her mother is described in the follow-
ing chapter, showing the legitimate tendency of insane asy-
lums to extinguish natural affection. I present it to my
readers as I find it recorded in my journal.

12

CHAPTER XL.

Mrs. Leonard's Visit to her Mother.

Yesterday I met Mrs. Leonard, who is here on a visit to her
mother. I advised her to take her mother home, and bestow
upon her a daughter's kind and dutiful care and attention,
instead of leaving her to the care of strangers.

She replied, " Why, I think it looks pleasant here. Don't
you enjoy staying here ?"

" No, I do not ; this is a very unnatural life, compelled to
live as we do. Defenceless, exposed to abuse, separated from
all our friends, and cut off from all intercourse with them,
shut out from the world and all the privileges of society and
citizenship, and worse than all, confined for an indefinite
period."

" Why, I think I could be happy here."

" You may perhaps have an opportunity to test it ; you may
become insane, and confined here ; or you may, like many
others, be confined here without being insane, and thus learn
by your own experience, what it is to be cast off by your own
children, as you have cast off your own mother ; for ' with
what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.'
Your mother is liable to abuse here, and I am her witness that
she receives, it, too."

" It seems pleasant here. I do not think they would make a
false impression upon strangers."

" A stranger passing through here, knows nothing about the
management of the house. When the friends visit, they are
told by the employees, that their friends are well taken care of
—that they are contented and happy ; and if the injured ones
dare to contradict these statements, they are sure to be
punished for it as soon as the friends are out of sight. Besides,
these visitors are instructed not to heed anything the patients

MRS. LEONARD'S VISIT. 267

say, and an attendant is to keep her ear open to the conver-
sation which her charge has with strangers, and is instructed
to urge them on if they tarry to hear anything they wish them
not to hear. The patients fearing to tell the truth, and denied
an opportunity of doing so, the visitor leaves with a very false
impression, and this dust which is thrown into his eyes, pre-
vents his seeing anything for himself, just as is the case with
you now."

" But the friends place them here, believing it is for their
good."

'; Yes, under this sophistical plea they take the first wrong
step. The neglected and injured relative, finds a class of
emotions germinating in his heart, which inevitably culmin-
ates in alienation, and irreconcilable enmity frequently ensues.
The wrong doers make the first infringement upon the law of
love by not doing as they would be done by. Every advanced
step in the wrong direction leads them into deeper and deeper
darkness, until at length they become so blinded and callous
that they lose all traces of humanity, and thus become entirely
perverted and fallen."

I could clearly discern in Mrs. Leonard, that she had become
sadly indifferent to her mother's welfare. She had got rid of a
burden by putting her off upon the care of others — the laws
approved of her course — it was even regarded by perverted
humanity as her duty thus to treat her — the tender yearnings
of her true nature were stifled, and she was left to moral judi-
cial blindness.

I told her she would not like to be thus cast off, if incapable
of taking care of herself; instead of this, she would claim that
this was just the time she most needed her friends' care and
assistance. When well, and able to care for herself, she had
better be then abandoned, rather than in a defenceless con-
dition.
• If these charitable institutions would only show their real

268 MODERN PERSECUTION.

character openly, as Inquisitions and Penitentiaries,- of the
worst kind, the danger to humanity would be mitigated to the
greatest extent ; for few are so lost to a desire for the esteem
of others, as to do such an outrageous act openly and pro-
fessedly, for the purpose of torturing their afflicted friends by
sending them to the Inquisition for that purpose.

But as it is, thousands are doing that very deed knowingly
to themselves, but ignorantly to the world, through the specious
plea of sending them to a hospital for " their good."

This morning Mrs. Leonard, came to the bars, and seemed de-
sirous of speaking to me. I left my work, which was cleaning
my bedstead, went to the bars and talked a little more with her.

I told her the patients in this ward were treated like slaves
and menials ; that the attendants claimed to be their overseers,
and ordered them to do the work which they were hired to do.
This morning, Miss Smith has ordered them to wash their
own bedsteads, and requires them to do it, whether they are
willing or not. Some object, saying that they are not put here
to work — that they have not been used to such work, and the
laws do not require it of them. Still she says they shall obey
her, in all she chooses to require.

There is Mrs. Stanley, for instance, who has not been used
to such work, having had hired help all her days, and she ob-
jects, but Miss Smith told her she should have no breakfast
until she had done all she had required of her. She started
for breakfast ; Miss Smith ordered her back, repeating her
threat. I did not tarry to see how the quarrel terminated. One
fact is evident, she went without her breakfast, and seemed to
feel like a much injured woman.

I told Mrs. Leonard that Mrs. Stanley was right in saying to
Miss Smith that she had no right to speak so to her, and order
her about hi that style, for the laws forbid it — Miss Smith
being her servant, and the laws expressly forbid involuntary
servitude.

MRS. LEONARD'S VISIT. 269

Yet -under our present system, we are regarded and treated
as their slaves, or as convicts in a Penitentiary, condemned
to work or risk the penalty of disobedience. I added :

" This is one of the greatest systems of oppression and
cruelty to human beings, the world ever witnessed."

She listened, apparently, with the indifference of a stoic,
and left me abruptly without making any remark.

I returned to my duties, feeling that I had done all my duty
to her, to get her eyes open, to see what the rules of the house
are. My hope was that the latent spark of filial feeling to-
wards her afflicted mother might be revived, and she, under
its natural promptings, be induced to take her home.

But all my efforts to enlighten her, seemed like water
spilled upon the ground. She evidently seemed to regard all
my talk as the representations of an insane person, whom
she considered beneath her notice or attention, except to hold
me up to scorn and ridicule. She plainly made light of it !

God grant that I may never be left to violate any of my ob-
ligations to any human being, so as to give my testimony in
favor of relations thus deserting their own kindred in the time
of their greatest need.

So far as my influence and example go, they shall find this
testimony in favor of kindness, the most unremitted, to my
afflicted kindred. I will do all that is possible to secure the
same to afflicted humanity wherever found. Should even my
husband become a raving maniac, I would not consent to his
being put into a hospital so long as any kindred of his own
could take care of him. A mother's authority, if necessary,
should secure for him the personal attentions of his children
in his behalf, so far as was necessary to aid my own personal
efforts for his comfort and happiness.

I would think of the reward which Mr. and Mrs. John
Hardy, of Shelburne, Mass., have received for themselves, in
taking care of their insane son, eighteen long years, so kindly,

270 MODERN PERSECUTION.

invariably, and unremittingly ; although they may, on enter-
ing upon their reward, exclaim :

" We have only done our plain duty to our child."

God, their Judge may reply :

" I acknowledge it to be true, and on this ground you have
proved your loyalty to my government, by obeying the pa-
rental laws of the nature I have given you, and not, like my
disloyal subjects, rejected its teachings, and left the unfortu-
nate one to stranger hands."

I should feel although weariness and painfulness might at-
tend the act, yet no selfish considerations should induce me to
swerve from, or remit our attentions to his comfort and his
wants. This sacred promise I now make, and record, that I
and my children, will be true to this pledge — So help us God!

CHAPTER XLI.

Mrs. Emeline Bridgman — or Nature's
Laws Broken.

This Mrs. Bridgman lias been an inmate of this Asylum for
the last ten years ; has been one of the most unfortunate vic-
tims to the deteriorating, debasing influences of such insti-
tutions, upon the true aspiring nature which God has given us.

Her nature is a specimen of a superior order of female or-
ganization, very tender, sensitive feelings, exquisitely suscep-
tible to emotions of a spiritual nature, feeling an insult to her
self-respect and native dignity to the most highly sensitive
degree, exhibited by a feeling of shame, mortification and self-
distrust; which seemed so deeply stamped upon her soul as to
render it impossible for her to rise above it.

So long has she suffered the shame of being regarded insane,
that she has become morbidly sensitive, and it seems now to
have become morally impossible to overcome it. She has a
superior intellect, conservative in its character, yet fully ca-
pable of clearly apprehending new ideas — new views of truth
— although instinctively averse to progress or change in her
opinions.

The Orthodox system of theology, as the conservative divines
of the last century taught, is her standard of truth, and all
deviations from this standard she is almost tempted to regard
as a sacrilegious act.

Her will is very persistent, almost inflexible ; her temper
forgiving, her spirit trustful ; still, fearful and doubtful as to
the future. All her hopes lie buried deep in the past.

No ray of hope illumes her future in this life, and her hopes
for the future rest upon a belief that she was made a subject
of regeneration twenty or thirty years since. On her evidences

272 MODERN PERSECUTION.

then, that she had experienced a change of heart, she now rests
her hope of final safety, believing that when this instantaneous
change of heart has been once experienced, there is no possi-
bility of a failure in receiving a heavenly inheritance.

Her nervous system became deranged from some physical
cause at the age of eighteen. She was then sent to the Wor-
cester Hospital, Massachusetts, where she remained a short
time under the treatment of Dr. Woodward, the Superintend-
ent. She soon recovered, and entered upon the practical
duties of life with interest and satisfaction.

She was happily married, and lived eight years with her
husband, when she became a childless widow.

Her life has since been like " the troubled sea which cannot
rest." Her nerves have become so chronically diseased, that
they constantly disturb her mental repose.

Her friends, at her own request, let her enter this Asylum,
hoping the result might be as favorable as it formerly had
been. But they were disappointed.

Instead of receiving the kind, humane, Christian treatment
here as she did at Worcester, she was treated most abusively
and brutally. Her sensitive feelings thus received such a
shock, followed by such a feeling of degradation and shame,
that it has become impossible for her to rally and recover her
lost self-respect.

As one specimen of the manner of treatment to which she
was subjected, she told me that in taking her baths, they
forced her to disregard, and tried to crush out every refined,
virtuous, and elevated feeling of her nature, telling her, in
most unmistakable language, that they considered this eradi-
cation of modesty as the object and intent of their discipline
and treatment.

Of course, her God-like nature instinctively revolted at this
heaven-defying sacrilege — this crushing of the divinity within
her. This, added to the abuse which was inflicted upon her

MRS. EMELINE BRIDGMAN. 273

tender, sensitive frame, was too much for her powers of
endurance.

Her nervous system, her aspiring feelings, her noble nature,
could never rally, so long as this abuse continued ; and it has
continued for ten long successive years.

Rather than to live in this agony, she sought death ; not
that she made any attempts to commit suicide, but she" often
begged and prayed that they would kill her outright, rather
than by this slow torturing process.

No ! so long as she exhibited any natural feelings under
this torture, she was subjected to the cruel rack. Her sound
logic, her entreaties, her prayers, her just and holy resent-
ment, each and all, only seemed alike an occasion for inflict-
ing some new form of degradation.

Mrs. Bridgman was scrupulously neat in her habits ; but
regardless of this, she was forced into the water tub where
several others had bathed, who were peculiarly filthy in their
personal habits, so that the water was not only highly colored,
but covered over the top with a thick scum of filth. Into this
she was plunged, head and ears, to their heart's content, and
held under the water !

Then, as her flesh was of an uncommonly fine texture,
sensitive in the extreme, she was scrubbed with a corn
broom, which had been first dipped into a dish of soft soap,
to lather her entirely over from head to foot, and then washed
off with the thick water already so soapy as to almost con-
sume the skin. Here she was rubbed and scrubbed, as if her
skin was a rhinoceros's, and then locked into her room, where
the cold was so intense that her hair was often frozen to her
pillow.

I inquired why she did not report the attendant's conduct
to the Superintendent.

She said she did try to, but he would not credit her state-
ments, since the attendants contradicted them, assuring him
12*

274 MODERN PERSECUTION.

that they had not abused her. He regarded her truthful
representations as the hallucinations of a diseased mind, and
the attendants' conduct was tacitly approved, as judicious
and correct.

Thus she found that all she had accomplished by reporting
them truthfully, was to elicit an approval of their practice
from the Superintendent, and a secret grudge against herself,
which she would be sure to know of in her future aggravated
and increased sorrows.

And now, since she has been made to become a mere wreck
of her former self, as to her personal habits, and her refined
manners and fashionable appearance, having become neces-
sarily almost indifferent to the opinion of others, as a result
of her loss of self-esteem, her earthly prospects seem to be
entirely blighted, even in the meridian of life ; and all the
natural result of the rule of this wicked Institution.

That she did not become a maniac long ago, is one of the
mysteries of God's providence. Since I have known her she
has not been insane. She has been one of my most esteemed
associates — as an intelligent and capable woman — as com-
petent to attend to the practical duties of life as ever, could
she only be induced to make the effort.

But all her ambition and self-esteem being prostrated by the
abuse she has experienced, her case seems almost hopeless —
her usefulness for this world destroyed, except so far as her
case may be employed as a warning — a living memorial of the
barbarous influences of the present Insane Asylum system.

If it had not been for these institutions, she might have
been, ere this, a useful and happy woman ; and had she been
cherished and cared for by her kindred, as their true hearts
then prompted, instead of being consigned to the care of
strangers, she might have recovered her health and spirits,
and long have been a blessing to them and to the world.

But alas! this willing victim has been offered a living

MRS. EMELINE BRIDGMAN. 275

sacrifice to the Lunatic Asylum! and under the specious
pretence that her good might be secured !

Several of her friends have died since she has been here,
but she was not allowed to know anything of the event, until
she chanced to see the notice of their death in the papers !

Oh, can this entombing of kindred while alive, be for their
or our own good ? Is it for our own good to cut off our
afflicted friends, and so desert them, as to root out all traces
of sympathy in them, or interest in their welfare ? Is it for
their good to put them where the affectionate yearnings of
their fond hearts have no object to cling to, and no means
allowed through which to exercise their emotions ? Can a
natural development of the faculties be secured by this most
unnatural process ?

No, no ; those who have survived this machinery are the
exceptions ; those who are injured the almost universal rule.

Mrs. Bridgman never was a fit subject for the asylum, since
she never was an insane person. She is diseased in her nervous
system, and instead of being treated as a criminal, she needs .
unusual forbearance and kindness, to inspire her with self-con-
fidence and thus draw out her self-reliant feelings and efforts.
All depressing, debasing influences are death-like in their
influence over her already weakened powers of resistance.

The only irregularity of conduct indicating a dethronement
.of reason, was a propensity to pick her clothes to pieces.
This appearance of restless uneasiness, would seek vent from
the ends of her fingers by nervous twitches upon something
tangible, which effort seemed to be an almost instinctive act
of self-defence from the overflowings of her pent-up mental
agonies.

I could not blame her any more than I could blame a drown-
ing man for catching at a straw as a reliance of self-defence.

Although the drowning man's act is in itself an unreason-
able act of self-dependence, yet we do not call it an insane act

276 MODERN PERSECUTION.

under his surrounding. So, although in reality, Mrs. Bridg-
man's acts of self-relief are not reasonable in themselves, yet
under the anguish of her mental throes, she should be excused
as innocent of an act really insane.

If her sufferings cannot be assuaged by judicious kind care,
she should be allowed great latitude in seeking any way of
relief her instincts might prompt.

She has been most wantonly and thoughtlessly punished,
being innocent, so that she is almost raving, under this insult
and abuse of her moral nature added to her physical sufferings.

I have heard her entreat Dr. McFarland to let her out of
this, place ! his utter indifference to her cries only confirmed
her in feeling that this is a place of hopeless torment, from
which she can never escape. Nor can it be right under any
circumstances, to keep a human being in such a state of
involuntary suffering, or to add to this suffering state personal
imprisonment.

She has been allowed to visit her friends several times,
within ten years, and remains with them a few weeks or
months, but the memory of the asylum so haunts her, that
its fear and dread are inseparable from her existence.

This Institution should place an inseparable barrier to her
entering it again ; her friends ought to adopt her anew into
the affections of their hearts, and make her feel sure that
they will never again forsake, but cherish and love her as
they would wish to be, in exchange of circumstances.

But from Dr. Tenny's account I fear they cherish no such
intention, but like other alienated perverted kindred, will feel
justified in placing her here again ; thus ridding themselves
of a burden upon their care and attention.

Rid of a burden ! What can be more humiliating to a
proud, noble nature than to feel that they are looked upon as
burdens by their friends such as they are willing to resign
knowingly into a state of hopeless, unmitigated sorrow.

MRS. E ME LINE BRIDGMAN. 277

Is there any spot in this great universe where human anguish
is equal to what is experienced in Lunatic Asylums !

Are we not experiencing the sum of human wretchedness ?
Can a woman's sufferings be greater than are Mrs. Bridg-
man's ?

To me she is the very personification of anguish. Oh, my
heart has so ached for her that I sometimes feel that I would
be willing to lay down my natural life to relieve her.

I did try to comfort her by imparting genuine sympathy in
deeds of kindness, and she would sometimes say that she found
some comfort in my room, but none anywhere else. I have
often assured her that if ever I got a home where I could do
as I pleased, I would like to adopt her into it most cheerfully
as my sister, and she should find in me an unfailing friend.

I have studied into the cause of her disease of the nervous
system, and so far as I can judge, it was caused by her disre-
garding the laws of her nature, as a woman, in working extra
hard at the time she was unwell. She said she suffered so
much pain at such times, that she sought relief by hard work,
and this exertion being unnatural, only increased the evil she
designed to remedy. Her temporary relief was purchased at
the price of future sufferings. A chronic disease was the
result, which has since manifested itself in untold mental
agonies.

If women would have resolution enough to be quiet at such
times as nature and reason both dictate, they would be relieved
of a vast amount of suffering, which is inseparably connected
with thus trifling with this law of our nature.

It is said that the Indian women who are so peculiarly ex-
empt from female diseases, invariably rest one or two days at
such times, and these are the only times that they lie in bed,
by sickness — in consequence of which they are almost as hardy
as the men. To them, the curse of the fall seems almost an-
nihilated.

278 MODERN PERSE CUTION .

• If civilized women would only learn this lesson from their
uncivilized sisters, they might hope to enjoy the same immu-
nity from suffering.

Since I feel conscientiously bound to regard all the laws of
my being as God's laws, and now recognizing this law in that
light, I cannot feel exempt from its obligation. Eighteen years
of obedience to this law has demonstrated the fact in my case,
that civilized woman can, by so doing, be as exempt from
suffering as their uncivilized sisters.

Oh I that civilized women would dare to be as healthy as
Indian women are, by daring to be as natural in obeying this
law of woman's nature ; then might we hope for progress,
based on the plane of sound and vigorous constitutions in their
offspring.

CHAPTER XLn.

Siek Patients Driven off from their
Beds.

Mrs. Watts was most peremptorily ordered off her bed whiie
sick, by Miss Smith, and this distressed woman was compelled
to stand leaning against her bed all day, suffering severe pain.

She had no chair or seat of any kind in her room, and was
not allowed to sit upon her bed, so she must stand all day or
lie upon the cold uncarpeted floor, so that her bed need not be
tumbled, lest company might pass through and thus prevent
a good display of the house !

After listening to the quarrel from my room, I went to com-
fort her, and found her as I have described. I expressed my
tender est sympathy, telling her that if it was in my power I
would do anything in the world to relieve her, but that I was
just as helpless as herself. I kissed and left her, saying :

" I will do all I can for you."

I then took Miss Bailey, the other attendant, into my room
and with tears in my eyes, I plead her case and appealed to her
compassion to take her part, and let her lie upon her bed,
saying :

" It is your right to act independently when you see the
patiente are wronged."

She assented to all I said, but did nothing.

I then went to Mrs. Watts, and offered her my bed, assuring
her I would protect her while there.

She positively declined doing this, saying :

" I guess I can bear it as the rest have to,"

I left her leaning against her bed, hoping some one would
come in to whom I could appeal for her. But no one came.

280 MODERN PERSECUTION.

After dinner I found her sitting upon the cold floor. I then
brought her my chair, and insisted that she should use it.
This she was willing and glad to do. At night I took it back
and told Miss Smith what I had done. She seemed impressed
with a feeling of guilt and apologized for having done so, and
gave me encouragement to hope she would not repeat the
offense.

The next day I made a most earnest appeal to Dr. Tenny in
behalf of the sick in our ward, to which he responded by
saying :

" I do think they ought to be allowed to lie upon their beds
when sick."

" Then do use your influence at headquarters, for we cannot
get a chance to tell our grievances to the Superintendent ; he
will no more listen to a patient's complaint, than he would
defend them from abuse ! "

Miss Elizabeth Bonner, an Irish attendant in the lowest
ward, thus caught one of her patients, Miss Mary Hodson, and
ordered her most peremptorily to get off from her bed. Her
tone and manner, in connection with the injustice of the act,
very naturally aroused the indignant feeling of the insulted
invalid, and she ventured a word in self-defence.

This is enough! She, Elizabeth Bonner, is not going to
bear insulting language from her patients !

She seizes her roughly and drags her from her high bed upon
the floor, with extreme violence. The patient thus aroused to
a higher pitch of indignation, now tries to defend herself with
the same kind of force she is called upon to resist.

A fight ensues. But alas ! for the unfortunate victim !

The laws of the house allow Miss Bonner to summon any
one in the house to her assistance ; while the abused one is
allowed no help, and if the patients volunteer their aid as their
sympathies sometimes compel them to do, they are sure to
find it to their own sorrow afterwards.

SICK PATIENTS.

281

Mr. and Mrs. Coe, the cooks, being near, were called in at
this juncture, where, according to their testimony given under
oath to the Investigating Committee, they found Miss Bonner
— a large heavy woman— resting her whole weight upon the
body of this small, delicate invalid, with her knees upon her
stomach, and thus confined she was using the patient's head as
a hammer, and her hair as a handle, and thus pounding the
floor with it with the greatest violence.

They exclaimed as they entered and saw this spectacle :
" Why, Lizzy, what are you doing ? Are you killing her V
" I am seeking satisfaction and I will have it ! I will not
be abused by a patient ! You help me jacket her so I can
have satisfaction upon her ! "

They suggested, " Why not put her into a screen-room,
where she can hurt no one and get quiet ? "

" I will have satisfaction upon her ! for she has got the devil
in her and I mean to beat it out of her."

She then persisted in putting on the straight-jacket as well
as she could, and then tied both her arms behind her back,
and dragged her across the hall to the bars, where she tied
each hand to the bars firmly, and tied each of her feet to
the bars in the same manner, and she tied her knees together
also. And thus having entirely disarmed her, she seized hold
of the hair of her head again and commenced beating the back
of her head against the sharp corners of the bars — each blow
inflicting a deep gash into her head — so that every blow was
followed with blood splashing in every direction, besmearing
the floor and walls, our clothes, and a pie I had in my hand,
with human gore.
We again exclaimed :

" Lizzy, are you actually going to kill her ? "
" No, but I will have satisfaction upon her and teach her
that I will not take abuse from a patient."

" Another time," Mrs. Coe adds, " happening in her ward

282 MODERN PERSECUTION.

at a call of duty, I saw her seize Mrs. O'Brien — an apparently
dying woman — who was lying upon a hard settee, confined
with a tight jacket about her, which Lizzy said was necessary
to keep the clothes over her ! But to all appearance she had
not strength enough to put them off.

The food and froth were running from her mouth and a
deadly look was upon her features. She took hold of one of
her arms and dragged her with violence from the settee upon
the floor and dragged her across the hall to the bath-room,
where with the help of her assistant, she held her face under
the streaming faucet by jerking her neck back by the hair of
her head !

In answer to my inquiry : " "What are you doing, Lizzy,
with that dying woman? " she replied :

" I am washing her neck and face ! "

" Wouldn't it be better to take off her clothes and put her
into a bath-tub and give her a nice, warm bath, and then put
her into a nice, clean bed ? "

" You had better be attending to your own business in the
kitchen, getting us something fit to eat, and not be here dic-
tating to me — if you don't stop this business, I'll report
you to Mrs. McFarland."

" Mrs. McFarland has no right to prevent my coming here
at the call of duty."

Mrs. O'Brien died a few days after.

She said also, " I know of another case where she dislocated
the arm of a patient by her treatment and she died a few days
after."

She said Dr. McFarland told her not to let it be known at all
abroad that she had dislocated the arm, and this was all the
reproof he gave her.

Miss Bonner has made her boast that Dr. McFarland once
caught her abusing a patient, and he just gave her a smile of
approbation and then left her to torture her poor helpless vie-

SICK PATIENTS. 283

tim to the full extent her angry passions prompted her to
do.

Oh ! if there is any place on earth where the afflicted have
no comforter, it is in our insane asylums. " Verily on the
side of their oppressors there is power, but they have no com-
forter,"— no protection.

For there is no link to connect the inmates of insane
asylums with the laws of the country.

So long therefore as this link is wanting, so long is every
inmate of our insane asylums liable and exposed to receive
the treatment inflicted upon Miss Hodson.

Often have I heard the threat expressed :

" I shall prosecute you for this."

And as often heard the retort :

" Insane people have no rights that the law respects. You
prosecute! What is your testimony worth as a witness, in
law ? Nothing ! You can't scare us by your threats — no law
reaches you — you are wholly at the mercy of your keepers !
We are. amenable to no law except the will of the, autocrat
who reigns supreme within these prison walls ! "

CHAPTER XLHI.

Interview with Mr. Wells, of Chicago — A
Victim of Homesickness.

At one of our dancing parties, I had the satisfaction of
meeting Mr. Wells, of Chicago, whom I found upon acquaint-
ance, to be a man of pleasing address, of fine talents, and
possessing a great share of learning and intelligence. While
others were engaged in dancing, we would oftentimes be con-
versing on subjects ot common interest respecting the man-
agement oi the asylum.

There seemed to be a perfect coincidence in our views in
relation to this subject, and we secretly agreed upon a plan oi
exposing it when we got out.

But he became a victim of homesickness to the highest
degree which caused his death.

This long pent up indignation would sometimes vent itself
in vehement language. For example, one night at our dance,
I inquired if he had heard from his friends. He replied in a
most vehement and impressive manner :

" Friends ! I have no friends ! I will never have a friend
again ! They have been the curse of my life ! Curse on all
the friends I ever had ! "

I can respond to this sentiment, as can almost all others
who have been put in here by their friends. It is indeed now
true, that " A man's foes are they of his own household."
And if any doubt it, I think if they were at once put in here by
their friends they would then be compelled to believe it. Miss
Hall, a very smart young lady who had been here for a few
weeks, said :

4 If my friends can put me into such a place as this, they can

MR. WELLS' HOMESICKNESS. 285

not care anything for me ; I am knocked about as if I were
nothing but a dog. I am Miss Smith's mere slave or brute.
It is enough to drive one's senses and intellect all away from
us, to be treated as we are. Those who have established
such Institutions must be criminals ! What can they mean, to
let that saucy, mean girl drive us about so ? And there is no
escape, no appeal from her impudence ! '

And, Mr. Wells, have you not ascertained that this is
one of the most prominent features of the ' treatment' we are
sent here to receive ? They must make us feel that we are
utterly deserted, with no sort of appeal, to inspire in us a
reverence for the despotic will which rules supreme here."

" Despotic will ! There never lived a greater despot, than
now lives in that man," pointing to Dr. McFarland, who was
now approaching us. "But we must separate — the Doctor
must not see us together."

Saying this, he arose and walked to another part of the hall.
After the Doctor left the hall, we resumed our conversation.

" Mr. Wells, have you suffered from Dr. McFarland' s
tyranny, personally ? "

" Indeed I have ; I could now show the deep ridges upon my
limbs here," placing his hands upon his lower limbs, just
above his knees, " marks of the rope with which I have been
bound to the bed-rack in the lowest ward ! "

" What ! you bound with ropes ! what did they bind you
for?"

" Because I insisted upon having my little poodle dog in my
room for my amusement, and his safety. I had just paid three
dollars for it, intending to carry it as a present to my little son
at Chicago. But being denied this solace, I contrived to evade
the command to take it from me ; and finding it in the coal-
bin, when I was out one day, I managed to get it back, un-
noticed, to my room.

But alas ! this happiness soon terminated ; for orders soon

286 MODERN PERSECUTION.

came from headquarters, that ' Mr. Wells be put into the lowest
ward, and confined to the bed-rack, as his penalty for this act
of disobedience.' I made every appeal possible to Dr. McFar-
land to induce him to mitigate my sentence ; but all in vain.
I said, ' Doctor, you are a father, 'can you not sympathize with
me in my desire to receive a welcome from my darling boy,
and in return bestow upon him a gift which I know will delight
him ? ' He made no reply, whatever, but turned away as if he
heard not a word I said ! "

" That is just as he has treated me, although physical abuse
I have riot suffered ; yet, what is worse, I feel his iron grip
upon my every inalienable right — all, all are at his bidding,
subject wholly to his will alone. Mr. Wells, this is a State
Institution ; can you tell me how such a despotism could have
taken root on Illinois soil ? "

" Mrs. Packard, the people of Illinois know nothing about
this Institution, except through the Doctor's one-sided reports.
He, himself, has run the Institution into a despotism, and now
it is hard to convince a blinded public of it, as he has made
them feel that he is almost infallible. He is of Scotch descent,
and he has stamped the monarchical feeling of his nature upon
this nominally republican Institution.

" But can it not be known ? Can't we tell of it, when we
get out ? "

" Yes, Mrs. Packard, I am determined upon that. I com-
mand a printing press at Chicago, and I will print all you will
write, and will write myself; and this shall be the first great
work I shall do, after I get out of this place. I am determined
in this matter. But don't let the Doctor know of this fact, for
he never will let us out alive if we do."

" But I have already told him of my determination, and
that is what he is keeping me for."

" Oh, Mrs. Packard, you will never get out then ! But I
will tell of your case when I get out, and help you, if I can."

MR. WELLS' HOMESICKNESS. 287

Here the party broke up, and taking his offered arm, he escor-
ted me to the door of my room, where we parted forever, with
these words ; while bending over me, he whispered in my ear :

" Mrs. Packard, my press shall be used for your benefit ; but,
Keep dark ! Keep dark ! "

In one week from this time Mr. Wells was a corpse.

His desire to see or hear from his wife and children in
Chicago, reached such a pitch of intensity, that nature could
bear no more. His large, capacious brain became convulsed
under the mental agony of too long suspense — of hope of hear-
ing from his wife too long deferred — and these fits continued,
•with but few short lucid intervals, until he died.

The day he died, Mary, the Doctor's youngest daughter,
came to my room, and remarked, with tears in her eyes :

"It is too bad ! it is too bad ! Father ought to have sent
Mr. Wells' letter."

" What do you mean, Mary ? "

" About one week ago Mr. Wells gave father a letter, to be
mailed to his wife. In this letter he wrote how terribly home-
sick he was — how he could not stand it much longer without
hearing from her — that if she disappointed him this time, it
would kill him. He knew it would kill him. The hope of
getting a reply to this letter would keep him up until there
had been time to get a reply, and then < if I don't get one 1
shall die . I oan't bear another disappointment and live through
it.' He then asked his wife's forgiveness for all the hard things
he had spoken or written about her putting him into such a
place, saying, as his only excuse, ' You cannot imagine how
much I am suffering. But I can, and will, forgive all, if you
will now take me out, or even write and tell me you will do so.
But if you do not promptly respond to this letter, in some way,
farewell forever ! It will be my last ! I shall die of anguish ! ' "

" Now," she added, " Mr. Wells is dead, and father has
that letter yet!"

288 MODERN PERSECUTION.

The very day he expected a reply, and received none, he went
into convulsions, which continued until he died.

As Mr. Wells was so well known in Chicago, I will here add
Mrs. Olsen's notice of him, as found in her " Prison Life."

Mrs. Olsen was for one year an associate with me in my
Asylum life and experience. For a few months we were allow-
ed to occupy the same ward and eat at the same table. The
companionship and sympathy of this devoted and most
intelligent Christian sister in bonds, was the brightest oasis
of my prison life.

Since our liberation she has written a most thrilling story of
her Asylum life, which I have published, and several thou-
sand copies of which are now in circulation. From this book
I make the following and also several subsequent extracts :

" One evening a ball was held in another hall to which I was
invited, I observed a very dignified and intelligent looking
gentleman, by whose appearance I inferred him to be one of
the attendants. On being introduced to this gentleman I
remarked :

" ' I presume, Sir, you are one of the attendants ? '

" 'No, I am not an attendant,' he replied with emphasis.

" ' But you are not a patient here ? Surely you are not
deprived of your liberty ? '

" ' They call me a patient, but I do not call myself one, as
nothing is done for my health.'

" This was the late Mr. Wells, of Chicago, formerly editor
and proprietor of a popular commercial paper in that city.
He proceeded to speak very freely to me, while the rest were
dancing.

" He said he had been ill treated by a landlord, and that
his indignation on the occasion had been construed into insanity,
and that his wife being frightened, was influenced by others to
take him to the " Asylum" where he had remained in a con-
dition of great physical discomfort, and mental suffering.

MR. WELLS' HOMESICKNESS. 289

" 1 asked him if he was not well treated by Dr. McFarland.

" He answered unhesitatingly in the negative, affirming that
he was uniformly cold and frigid in his deportment to him.

u I endeavored to console him as well as I could, referring
him to those general principles of justice, which I believed
would ultimately be carried out, and work emancipation to
all the suffering. I said nothing disrespectful of Dr. McFar-
land, as I did not wish to confirm the views of Mr. Wells, or
add to his unpleasant feelings in that direction; but said
briefly all I could suggest in favor of the Doctor, reminding
Mr. Wells how difficult it must be to do justice to every one,
in a position involving such weighty responsibilities.

" I cannot forget the look he gave me, as he turned away
in apparent disgust.

' " If you are the apologist of McFarland and his iniquities,
I don't covet your acquaintance,' he exclaimed with much
emphasis.

" I apologized for having inadvertently wounded his feel-
ings, and quietly withdrew to another part of the hall.

" In the course of the evening, we met again. Feeling reluct-
ant that he should have an erroneous impression respecting my
conversation, I made some bland remark about the festivity of
the evening. Quite reinstated in his good humor, he replied
very politely, and again we entered into conversation.

" I asked him if he did not dance on these occasions.

6 " I have danced sometimes, but I shall never dance in these
halls again. I cannot dance — 1 am thinking of my lonely
young wife — my little babes, thus deprived of a father's pro-
tection, I am all but dying to see them.'

" He spoke of his wife with the deepest tenderness ; said
she was ever true and forever kind to him ; he did not at all
blame her for his imprisonment, but severely blamed those
who had been her advisers.

' " No,' he repeated, as he cast a rueful look again upon the
13

290 MODERN PERSECUTION.

dancers, ' no, no ; I shall never dance in these halls any-
more.'

" Soon the ball was ended, I bade him good evening, and
we parted.

" One week later another ball was held in the same hall, to
which again a few of the patients, myself included, were
invited. I looked around for my friend, but looked in vain.

" Upon inquiring, I was informed that Mr. Wells was very
sick. His prediction proved true ; he had indeed danced his
last. Grief and suffering had brought on a disease, which
could not be cured, at least by the cold ministrations of care-
less hirelings.

" They were dancing — He was dying ! "

CHAPTER XLIV.

An Asylum Sabbath.

It was my good fortune to find the Sabbath-day here ob-
served or kept in what I call a Christian manner. It was
observed as a day of rest, as God's command requires.

There were more tumbled beds, this day, than any other.
The rule of other days, " Keep them off their beds," was in a
measure suspended on this day for rest. It was very seldom
that company entered the wards on this day, therefore this
suspension of the rules for " display," was no detriment to
the reputation of the house.

I felt that, for myself, I could better meet the demands of
my conscience under the influence of this house, than I ever
could outside its walls.

Having all my life been connected with a minister's family,
I found, of course, little time for the rest the command
enjoined upon me.

Besides attending to the necessary labor incident to eating
and sleeping, as on other days, I was obliged not only to dress
myself, but my children also, for church and Sunday school,
and attend two or three public services, besides the Sunday
school and teachers' meeting, perhaps, in addition ; so that
when my resting hour arrived, I would usually feel more the
need of rest from weariness, than any other day of the week.

NW, since I have allowed my common-sense a little lati-
tude in this direction, I am convinced I was then in reality
breaking the Sabbath, by pursuing this course. Instead of
being rested as I ought to have been, in mind and body, by
the Sabbath, I so used it as to unfit myself for the renewal
of weekly toil with fresh vigor.

292 MODERN PERSECUTION.

I now understand that God rested from his labor on the
Sabbath, and so should we.

He has so constituted us, that more than six days of con-
tinued, unbroken labor, without extra rest, is a detriment to
our mental and physical faculties. To go to meeting too
much, may be breaking the spirit of the command, as well as
working too much. It is rest that we need, and it is rest we
should feel bound to take on this day, as an act of obedience
to a law of our nature.

We should so spend the day as to find ourselves refreshed
and invigorated for the active duties of our calling ; otherwise
we break the Sabbath.

CHAPTER XLV.

An Attendant put under My Charge.

Miss Adelaide Tryon, a young school girl of eighteen years,
was introduced into our ward, to take Miss Smith's place. To
all appearances, she is a girl of weak mind, and small abilities ;
but time alone will test her, and develop whether she is fitted
for the place or not.

My first impressions of her are not good, still I intend to
suspend judgment till a fair trial. My mind may be a little
prejudiced, from my first interview.

I went into the dining-room, after breakfast as usual, to get
my ice, when I met her at her duties. Since the ice had not
come up, I waited a few minutes and entered into conversation
with her.

She answered me rather short and abruptly, evidently try-
ing to impress the idea upon my mind, that she regarded me
as beneath her notice, except as her under-servant. She or-
dered me to hand her the knives and forks, for her to put
around the table, which I did ; after which she ordered me
out of the dining-room.

I silently obeyed, and returned to my room to ponder over
the peculiar trials to which an imprisonment among maniacs
rendered our moral nature liable.

While upon my knees praying for grace and patience to bear
them with a Christian spirit, my devotions were suspended by
the entrance of Miss Hall. She came with a full heart of
grief and sorrow to pour out her complaints to me. She fin-
ished by saying :

" Mrs. Packard, I had rather be taken out and shot than be
looked upon as an insane person, and treated as we are."

294 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" So had I, and so would hundreds of others here, could
they have their choice."

Here God had sent me a remedy for my own sorrows ; I
must bear her burdens, to lighten my own. Like many others
here, Miss Hall is suffering for the sins of her friends towards
her, and now in addition, she has to bear the sins of Dr. Mc-
Farland's injustice by suffering his attendants to torment her.

After she left, Miss Try on came to my room and attempted
to bolt in, very unceremoniously. I arose and opened the
door and introduced her in, when she, in a very abrupt man-
ner, said :

" I came in to see what you were doing ; what have you in
your hand ? Are you fond of reading ? "

After answering her civilly, I tried to converse with her in
an intelligent lady-like manner ; to which she seemed heed-
lessly indifferent, evidently seeming to regard what I said, as
idle talk, beneath her notice.

Here, this little school-girl feels at liberty to lord it over
me as much as she chooses, regarding me and my society with
contempt !

Mean as she seems, I wish to do her good as a sister. But
in order to do so, I think I must tell her that I am not her
servant — that she is my servant, that I am a boarder here,
and she a hired servant to wait upon the boarders. If she at-
tempts to rule over me, I shall regard it as an insult, such as
I shall feel morally bound to resent. But by forbearance and
patience, she may be led to see her faults for herself, and avoid
them in future.

I have told her that I was the means of getting her here,
for it was through my influence that Miss Smith was dis-
charged, since I reported her to the Doctor for her abuse of
the patients.

She said, " You won't report me, will you ? "

" I don't expect to have occasion to do so, for I trust you
will be kind to them."

MY CHARGE OF AN ATTENDANT. 295

It is due Miss Tryon to add that she became a reasonable
and kind attendant ; and so far as her subsequent treatment*
of me was concerned, I had no occasion to complain of her,
and as Providence appointed, I was delegated by her father
to be her guardian ! This was a new thing in Asylum life, to
have an attendant put under the care of a patient ! The facts
are these :

Miss Tryon one day brought her father to my room, and
after introducing us, as I responded to her lady-like knock, by
opening the door, she left us, and I asked him into my room,
when we soon found ourselves engaged in earnest and intelli-
gent conversation. As he took his leave, he remarked :

" Mrs. Packard, I see you are a sensible woman ; now, may
I not be allowed to place my daughter under your charge,
since she is young and inexperienced, and needs the guardian-
ship of some one like yourself? "

" Certainly, Mr. Tryon, I not only thank you for the com-
pliment, but I should be happy to accept the charge, and will
promise you to be to her a true friend."

Apparently pleased and satisfied with my answer, he took
a respectful leave, and joined his daughter in her room, where
he asked her about me, who I was, etc.

To her reply that I was a patient, he expressed his astonish-
ment by exclaiming :

" Why, she is the most intelligent lady I ever saw ! There
is not the least particle of insanity about her ! There must be
some mistake about that."

" I think so too, for she has been just as she is now, during
the three weeks I have been here, and all in the house say she
has been just the same, ever since she has been here."

" There must be some mistake — there is foul play somewhere
— I shall speak to Dr. McFarland about this."

And he did speak ; and the result was : Miss Tryon re-
ceived express orders from Dr. McFarland never to let her
father into the ward again !

CHAPTER XLVI.

A Scene in the Fifth Ward.

One afternoon, Miss Tryon came to me in quite an exhausted
condition, exclaiming :

" I am actually weak and faint from witnessing a scene of
abuse in the lowest ward. Bridget Welch, Elizabeth Bonner's
assistant, has been treating one of her patients most barba-
rously. I never saw a human being so basely abused. Bridget,
in her passion, seemed more like a fiend than a woman. If
Dr. McFarland could have seen and known how she treated
her patient, and approved of it, he must be a very different
man from what I had supposed."

" The Doctor does know and approve of things most horri-
ble here. I could prove that Elizabeth Bonner had said the
Doctor once caught her, in one of her passions, abusing her
defenceless victim, and gave her a smile of approbation, leav-
ing her to expend her fury to her heart's content."

She replied, that Bridget had told her that she and Elizabeth
were fighting Miss Rollins, and the Doctor caught them at it,
and simply passed on, exclaiming as he passed :

" ' That is right — Give it to her, unless she will give up.' "
But, " it don't sound like Dr. McFarland."

" No, it don't sound like him in his ostensible character, but
I fear it is like him in his real character ; he is a very deceit-
ful man. He looks well after his ostensible character, and
plans very adroitly, to delude, deceive, and pervert the truth,
so as to shield himself publicly from the imputation of inhu-
manity. When he finds he has gone too far in encouraging-
abuse, and is in danger of exposure, he is careful to give the
tide of feeling a new turn, by discharging ^the attendant for
abuse, and thus reserve to himself the credit of being humane
to his patients.

SCENE IN THE FIFTH WARD. 297

Thus he puts upon our merciful sex, the credit of the in-
humanity of his acts, and claims to himself the humanity. In
reality, he instigates them to do what their nature revolts at,
but what they feel compelled to do, to retain his approval ;
then he will add abuse to abuse by discharging them for doing
as he wished them to do!"

She said Bridget Connelly had refused to leave the dining-
room at the request of Bridget Welch, the attendant. Instead
of dealing gently with her, to induce her to go, they used
authority over her, which did not increase her readiness to obey.

Then commenced a terrible scene of battle ; the attendant
seized Bridget by the hair, when Miss Tryon came to the res-
cue.

She endeavored to pacify both parties, by trying to induce
Bridget Connelly to leave the hall. But her endeavors were
not successful in making peace.

By the help of another attendant, they undertook to secure
the obedience of Bridget by brute force. Thus they succeeded
in what they called " subduing her."

"Having done this, and even after the patient had yielded, they
inflicted upon her a terrible beating. Then throwing her upon
the floor, they kicked, pounded, and stamped upon her with
both feet. They repeatedly knocked her head upon the floor
with great violence, pulled up her head by the hair, pounding
it with vehemence. It seemed as if this process must have
beaten all the sense out of her, which was, indeed, the case.
She became almost insensible before they finished. Exhausted
and overcome with suffering, her strength now entirely failed.
In this condition they dragged her, as if she were a dead car-
cass, from the dining-room, across the long hall, then locked
her up, and left her alone to her fate. Indeed she seemed
nearly dead."

I said to Miss Tryon, " The Doctor ought to know it."

" I do not like to tell him, being a stranger here ; and I may

MODERN PERSECUTION.

get the ill will of the attendants. Dr. McFarland often in-
structs us to observe the By-laws, which say we must take the
attendants' part, when called upon to do so, and I did not con-
tinue to do it when I found how she was misusing her."

I felt that I could appreciate her feelings, and could not urge
her to tell the Doctor ; but I felt that a responsibility rested
now upon me, and retired to my room to seek wisdom to know
and do my duty with reference to it.

While thus employed, Miss Tryon came to my door, and
asked me to promise her that I would say nothing to the Doc-
tor about it.

I told her I would not make such a promise ; that I had the
demands of my own conscience to meet, and I should do what
seemed my duty. I added, however :

" You have nothing to fear, Miss Tryon, from what I do ;
it will not harm you, for you are deserving great praise for what
you have done. The stand you have taken, has shown you to
be true to your nature — to the dictates of humanity — such a
position cannot harm you. It will exalt you more than any
course you can pursue. Don't fear to do right — to be true to
your knia instinct — for this is the only true road to prefer-
ment."

I again asked for light to know my duty, and concluded to
report to the Doctor myself.

I accordingly did so, when Dr. Tenny came to my room. I
have found by observation, that Dr. Tenny possesses a heart.
He has not permitted the generous, tender sympathies of his
heart to ossify as Dr. McFarland has done, by turning a deaf
ear to the claims upon his sympathy, which his suffering
patients demanded of him. We can go to Dr. Tenny, feeling
that his ear is not deaf to the dictates of reason and humanity.
We find he has a heart to pity, and feel that he will do what?
in reason, he can for us.

The prompt, vigorous response he made to my appeal, shows

SCENE IN THE FIFTH WARD. 299

him to be still alive, and not " dead in trespasses and sins."
After patiently listening, and giving me opportunity to un-
burden my heart to him, by telling the particulars of the case,
as Miss Tryon related them to me, he sought the Doctor's
office with a quick step, and there related the affair as I had
told him, accompanying it with such enthusiasm and indigna-
tion, that it seemed to arouse the intellect of Dr. McFarland.

He saw that unless he did something, others would.

He accordingly summoned Bridget and Miss Tryon to his
presence, and the latter was called on to relate the story her-
self.

She did so, and Bridget did not deny it.

The Doctor then summoned Bridget to his office, and gave
her a discharge.

CHAPTER XLVII.

Mrs. Olsen's Fifth. Ward Experiences.

As the reader is now introduced into the Fifth ward, I will
here add a chapter from Mrs. Olsen's experience there. She
was consigned to this ward because she ventured to expostulate
with Mrs. McFarland upon her refusing to grant her request
for permission to write to her friends, instead of accepting the
denial with unanswering submission.

" If the inhabitants of the Twentieth century should ever
have the real condition of this terrible prison described as it
now exists, and be informed of the purposes to which it is ap-
plied, they will regard this prison with the same feeling as we
now do the Spanish Inquisition and its abettors and apologists.

As, under the guidance of the ill-fated Dr. Tenny, I descend-
ed the three long nights of stairs leading to this charnel house
of human woe, I felt a dizzy heart-sickness which almost de-
prived me of the power of articulation. Was it a prescience
of those a coming events," which " cast their shadows before,"
that affected me thus ?"

I could not tell, but was only conscious of a faintness and
weakness which nearly deprived me of the power of locomo-
tion.

I asked Dr. Tenny to give me a formal introduction to the
attendant, having never seen her. He complied, and though
her countenance had an expression of stern repulsiveness, I
determined, if there was any goodness in her, to find it out. 1
would, by the patience and assiduous kindness of my own de-
portment, awaken and develop all of goodness and humanity
that might possibly be found smouldering beneath the icy sur-
face of her heart. Perceiving that she was Irish, I remarked :

" Oh, you are an Irish lady ; I love the Irish dearly ; many

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 301

of them have shown me much kindness. I know your people
are kind-hearted. Well, you may be sure that I shall give
you no trouble. I always obey the rules, and try to help my
attendants ; indeed, Miss Bonner, I think you must have much
work to do here, with so many to take care of, and perhaps I
may be able to assist you some in your labor."

I thus attempted to conciliate, and enlist her kind feelings.
But slander and hatred had taken fearfully the start of me.
She replied, as I had said I should give her no trouble :

" Indeed yee'd better not make me any trouble, it won't be
well fur ye if ye do."

I confess I was " taken back a few miles ! "

She continued, " yee's no better'n the rest on em ; yee'r all
jist alike here, un ye needn't ixpict iny better treatment un
the rest on um git. Now ye jist set down (pointing to a hard
stationary bench) un mind yer business. Yer the wust un, the
crazyest on em all in the hull Institution; yees a nuisance."

After this most amiable delivery, she stopped to take breath,
and fearing she might again start on a fresh " heat," I imme-
diately obeyed her, by sitting down in silence on the bench
she had assigned me.

I began to doubt my power over the insane. Here indeed
I saw the insane without mistake, but I then thought, and
never afterwards changed my opinion, that Lizzy Bonner was
more insane than any one in her care ! I did not fear them,
with all their fury ; but I confess I did fear her, with her much
wilder fury !

I had always some expedient by which I could easily disarm
her very wildest maniacs, but I never could disarm or tame
their far more ferocious keeper !

Beside me, sitting, or rather crouching on the same bench,
were a few silent and very filthy women, with their one gar-
ment indecently torn, and a puddle of unfragrant water on
the floor under their feet.

302 MODERN PERSECUTION.

Some, in more remote parts of the hall, were screaming fear-
iully, at which I did not wonder. If I had been a screamer, or
at all nervous, I should doubtless have swelled the concert, so
lull was this pandemonium of every imaginable horror !

The faces of many were frightfully blackened by blows, re-
ceived partly from each other in their internecine conflicts,
but mostly, I subsequently discovered, by their attendants !

One very fat old woman who could not speak English, was
sitting on the floor with a perfectly idiotic expression upon
her face. One pale girl sat weeping bitterly, and shivering
upon a bench with very thin clothing. Several were silent
and appeared to take no notice of anything. These were
melancholies in nearly the last stages of despair.

One, in quite the last stage as I inferred, was tied to her
hard bench with her arms and chest tightly confined by a
straight-jacket, and attempting to commit suicide by fiercely
beating her head back against the wall. The sight of this poor
young female, in her frantic attempts to rush from an obvious
hell into the untried scenes of an undiscovered future, was too
appalling for me to gaze upon. I turned away my eyes with
a sick horror, but still heard her pounding her bruised head.

No one here was working, for all capable of being made to
work, were at this time engaged in some of the numerous toil-
ing departments of the establishment. Some were lying on the
floor, exhibiting the most indescribably indecent appearances.

The windows were all open ; I was shivering with cold,
being at this time in the incipient stages of fever and ague.

This disease was probably acquired by inhaling- the mephi-
tic exhalations of the Eighth ward.

I drew my woolen shawl closely about my person, covering
my head and eyes from these terrific sights and sounds, and
sat in dumb amazement.

" Is this," I silently ejaculated, "the destiny to which I am
doomed for an indefinite period ? "

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 303

Oh, the insufferable anguish of those moments of horror !
Language cannot portray it ; it is utterly powerless. Every
faculty of mind was intensified to the utmost, in those few
moments of dumb tearless agony. It seemed as if my palsied
heart must cease its beating.

But these contemplations were soon interrupted by the
coarse voice of Bonner, screaming loudly from the opposite
end of the long hall. She was obliged to scream very loud,
in order to be heard above the rest of the screamers.

" Miss Coalspit, come here ! "

Not supposing myself addressed, I did not move from my
seat ; she repeated :

" Miss Coalspit, I tell ye come here ! "

Still I moved not, and began to wonder that neither did
any one else, in obedience to this imperative mandate. Ob-
serving me still motionless, she yelled out yet more furiously:

" You woman that's a sittin there with yer shawl all over
yer head, I tell ye come here this minute ! "

This last was a " trumpet " with no " uncertain sound ! " I
rose immediately, walked down the hall to where she was
standing, and said in a low voice :

" Excuse me, Miss Bonner, I did not know you addressed
me, as my name is not Miss Coalspit, but Mrs. Olsen."

" We call folks anything here, jest as happens ; we don't
stan about bein polite here to any on yees," she replied in a
stormy voice.

" So I perceive, but for myself, you will please excuse me
from following this fashion. I have no more politeness than
I need, I cannot dispense with any, but must use all I have,
as I perceive politeness is rather needed here ; what do you
wish of me, Miss Bonner ? "

" I wish ye to take off that are shawl, ye don't need it
here ; the rest on em don't wear shawls, un you shan't."

"lam very cold — have taken the fever and ague, the chills

304 MODERN PERSECUTION.

are upon me now, and I fear sitting still with the windows
open, as you say I must, would in this very damp air, cause
me to take cold ; I should prefer to keep my shawl upon me
for the present, if you please, Miss Bonner."

" I don't want any of yer talk ; take it right off this minute,
ur I'll save yees the trouble — folks have to mind here, I tell
ye, — so be quick."

Seeing her fiercely approaching me, I immediately gave her
my shawl, walked once more to my seat, and again sat down
still, as she had ordered me to do.

In this prison was exacted the most immediate and uncom-
promising obedience to rules and requirements which a slave
holder would have blushed to inflict upon his human chattels.
Our own preferences were never consulted.

u You must do this because I want ye to," was all the rea-
son given.

Does the public think this a good way for lost sanity to be
regained ?

Alas, what has the public hitherto known about it ?

There is absolutely no escape from obedience here, no matter
what is required. I have many times, seen even tardy or re-
luctant obedience punished with fearful severity.

I have seen the attendant strike and unmercifully beat her
patients on the head with a bunch of heavy keys which she
carried fastened by a cord around her waist ; leaving their
faces blackened and scarred for weeks.

I have seen her twist their arms and cross them behind the
back, tie them in that position, and then beat the victim till
the other patients would cry out, begging her to desist.

I have seen her punish them by pouring cold water into their
bosoms, a pailful at the time, leaving it to dry without chang-
ing their wet clothing, the remainder of the day, several hours.

I have seen her strike them prostrate to the floor with great
violence, then beat and kick them.

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 305

At other times I have seen Elizabeth Bonner after throwing
them down, their faces to the floor, pull them back and forth
by the hair, and beat the noses and faces repeatedly upon
the floor.

I have seen her kneel upon their bodies and strike and pound
them, till by struggling and crying, they became too weak to
make resistance, then drag them to their rooms and lock
them up for many hours, leaving them alone.

I have seen her do all this too, without any proof that they
had been guilty of what she had accused them. And even
when others had accused them, she was always more ready
to believe the accuser than anything the accused could say in
self-defence.

In this way, this Jury, Judge, and Executive of her own
laws, went on using the powers her position as head attendant
gave her under the direction and command of Dr. Andrew
McFarland! " our accomplished Superintendent! "

It was not rarely and occasionally, but hourly and continu-
ally, that these brutalities occurred.

There was not a single day, of the twenty days I staid there,
that I did not witness scenes of this character. Sometimes it
appeared that I must turn away ; that I could not endure to
see human beings thus abused. But the next thought was one
of self-accusation for being thus tender to my own feelings.

" If these sufferers can bear to feel it, I can and will bear to
see it, for if I do not see these things, I cannot testify that I
did. So I will even look on."

But this resolution I confess did sometimes break down, for
I was often so much shocked that I had to turn away my
eyes, and many times I stuffed both my ears as full as possible,
with locks of cotton to deaden the noise of demoniac shrieking
of these victims when under torture.

One day I became so indignant that I summoned courage,
and told Miss Bonner that if she did not stop abusing the
patients in this way, I should tell Dr. McFarland of it.

306 MODERN PERSE CUT I ON.

" Dr. McFarland knows all about it, I don't do anything
here, but what he knows it all, and he tells me to manage
the patients here by my own judgment, and I intend to do as
he tells me. So you can mind your own business."

But I told her then that I should talk matters over with
Dr. Tenny when I could get a chance to see him, and intimated
that I should give him some edifying information of how mat-
ters went on. Also that in due time Mrs. Packard should be
informed of these affairs.

" You shan't tell Mrs. Packard, she's a lady, and you're a
nuisance ; you ain't fit to speak to her."

" But she loves me, if I am a nuisance ; she gave me this
chain," pointing to a beautifully-wrought white chain which I
then wore upon my neck. " She gave me this to wear as a
pledge of her attachment to me, and I shall wear it every
day, for her sake."

Lizzy " looked daggers," at this discovery, and had it not
been for the great popularity of Mrs. Packard there, I think
she would have robbed me of this beautiful ornament, as I have
seen her rob others of gold ornaments.

At that moment, I was wearing garments which Mrs.
Packard had lent me in the Eighth ward, as my own under
garments had been stolen from me, and divided among some
of the employees in the asylum.

As soon as " Liz " knew I was wearing borrowed garments
of Mrs. Packard, she compelled me to take them off and give
them to her, to be returned to Mrs. Packard, saying that it
was against the rules for one patient to borrow of another.

" I wish it was against the rules to let the servants steal
the clothing from the patients."

But this I said in my own heart, not vocally.

The loss of these garments, added to the robbery of my
shawl, caused me to shiver continually. In a few days, the
fever and ague was so established that I became nearly prostrate.

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 307

When again I saw Dr. Tenny, I told him how I constantly
shivered for the loss of my clothing. He ordered Lizzy to
restore my shawl immediately, which she did; my stolen
garments were not returned.

After this, Lizzy appeared to hate me with a bitterness that
was truly appalling. She tried in many ways, to provoke me to
ill temper, as 1 supposed, in order to frame some complaint
against me, or to have some excuse for abusing me. But I
determined she should have not even the semblance of justifi-
cation for the wanton insults with which she first met, and
almost uniformly ever afterwards treated me, especially while
in the lowest prison ward.

I resolutely governed my temper, persevered in obeying
instantly her slightest commands, and always addressed her
with tones of mildness and conciliation.

She never, in the Fifth ward, used any violence with me, but
assured me of her readiness to do so, in case I dared to disobey.

As she saw to her sorrow, that there was some danger of
Dr. Tenny's protecting me, she was obliged to refrain from
actually striking me, but calmed off occasionally some small
portion of her ever-boiling fury, by shaking her fists, and
annoying me with all the little petty persecutions possible.

In my dialogue with Lizzy Bonner, already referred to, I
had given her to understand that I should lay these matters
before Dr. Tenny, the first opportunity.

She replied, that if I interfered, I should " git the same
treatment the rest on 'em git."

I was so closely watched, however, that no opportunity
occurred for a long time, in which to tell Dr. Tenny.

Dr. McFarland seldom came into the Fifth ward, and when
he did, would pass directly through the hall, without ever, to
my knowledge, stopping to show the least sympathy, or the
least attempt to relieve the suffering so dreadfully apparent
in every face.

308 MODERN PERSECUTION.

We used to say that Dr. McFarland's nose was too deli-
cate ; he didn't seem much to enjoy the smell of the Fifth
ward. We didn't blame him for that ; we only blamed him
for making us endure it.

The room Lizzy gave me was one where the occupant,
unfortunately, was much addicted to using tobacco, and would
eject the superfluous perversion of the gastric juice all over
the floor, and the walls of her room, with a liberality, which,
to a decent woman, must be truly appalling.

It certainly appalled me, when, to my utter consternation,
I discovered that this room was assigned to me !

In this most filthy place, I could not breathe without nearly
strangling, but I was assured that the room was :

" Good enough fur yees."

Sick and enfeebled as the ague had made me, I yet felt
more able to scrub and clean, than to breathe and sleep in
this terrible Pandora's box as it was.

I very mildly asked of my attendant the privilege of pro-
curing from the wash-room a pail of hot water and soap, with
which to clean this room. She granted this favor, and I was
overjoyed, having feared that I was to be locked in here as
it was.

I began my task, proceeding gradually as my strength
allowed, to scrub and make clean this filthy room, so far as
I was able to reach the wall upwards. The remainder I was
obliged to leave unfinished. But the floor I made quite clean,
with abundance of water and soap scrubbing, so that before
night the room was really quite tolerable.

One of the insane, who was allowed to go out, had the
kindness to bring a nice bouquet of beautiful flowers, which I
accepted gratefully, and placed in my partly darkened window.
I looked upon these beautiful expressions of good-will with
real pleasure, — a pleasure bestowed by the sweet ministra-
tions of our gentle mother nature.

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 309

What a poor fool I was, to imagine for a moment that such
a privilege would be allowed me !

As soon as Lizzy came along, she rushed up to my flowers,
jerked them out of the room in an instant, without saying a
word, then giving the door a bang with her keys, vanished out
of my sight.

I dared make no remonstrance, "lest some worse thing
might come to me."

The next day, lo, a worse thing did come !

Seeing how tidy and clean I had made the room, she in-
formed me she wanted that room for another patient.

Before I had time even to look up in atonishment, I was
jerked out of it, with as little ceremony as had been my un-
fortunate flowers the previous day. Opening another door,
into another horribly filthy room, she said :

" This is to be your room now."

I shall not attempt to portray my feelings on this occa-
sion!

With much abated strength, and now rather waning hope,
again I procured soap and other etceteras, and repeated the
cleaning process of the previous day.

I was allowed only two days to enjoy(f) this room before I
was again driven into one still worse !

Those " petty persecutions " continued till the attendant
saw that I had no strength left with which to scrub. Then
she put me into a screen-room and there I remained the time
I staid in this ward.

One day I heard a dreadful noise, worse by far than any I
had previously heard. It appeared that for some trifling
offence, disputing with an attendant, I believe, Mrs. Hays had
incurred the anger of Lizzy Bonner, who now was punishing
her.

She tore off, one after another, every single article of cloth-
ing from her victim. She did this with so much haste, that

310 MODERN PERSECUTION.

she tore the under woolen garment into several pieces, and
threw the pieces about the floor. ' Then when perfectly nude,
the attendant kicked her body till she had crowded her quite
under a stationary bench, when Mrs. Hays curled herself up
in a heap, so to speak.

Lizzy's back was turned to me ; she did not know I was
" taking notes."

I stood paralyzed on witnessing these barbarities, silent and
motionless, transfixed with a cold creeping horror :

" Oh, God ! " exclaimed I, ' in the deep abyss of my soul,
while with dumb lips I quailed.' " Is it thus that thy children
must suffer ? How long, Oh, Lord, how long ? "

The screams of the sufferer were so terrific, and the blows
she received so much more terrific, that at last I turned to
leave the scene, feeling that I could no longer endure to see it.

But in one instant, — as if more than mortal strength come
to my aid, — I thought, " if this sufferer can bear to feel them,
I will train my selfish nerves to look on. Because, if I do not
see these things, I can never say that I saw them, and as they
do exist, I wish to be able to testify."

I silently prayed that death should come to the suffering
Mrs. Hays, and relieve her from further torment. But she
did not die, for her time had not yet come. Neither did I die,
for my time had not yet come.

After Lizzy had beaten, and pulled her hair, and kicked her,
to her perfect satisfaction, she dragged her across the hall, into
an empty room, and after telling her that "she shouldn't have
any supper," left her entirely naked, locked up alone.

Mrs. Hays made no reply ; she seemed evidently much
weakened ; I had no idea that she could live till morning, for
I did not then know how far the endurance of human suffer-
ing could be carried.

I said nothing to any one. A heavy cloud like the gloom
of a funeral in a stormy day was upon my spirit. I felt as

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 3H

the power of human language had left me, and I quietly glided
back to my screen-room.

I saw at supper time while passing her door on my way to
the dining hall, that two other very imsane women had now
been locked up with Mrs. Hays. Their door was only half a
door, the upper part being ah open iron frame like a window
frame, so that one on passing, could see all within. Indeed
chis was just like my own door at this time, so that I had no
protection, not even that of a whole door to defend me from the
horrid sounds, sights and smells of this truly purgatorial abode.

" But why are these three dangerous women locked up to-
gether ? " was my query.

I believe it was done so that in case the black spots which
the blows of Lizzy had made upon the face of her victim should
not disappear in comfortable season, their infliction might be
ascribed to the two fierce patients locked up there with her !

I went to my supper table sadder than I had ever felt.
The terrible sights I had seen, followed my vision and de-
stroyed my appetite.

I managed to steal a biscuit from the table, intending to
slip it through her bars to the suffering Mrs. Hays, as I passed
her door on returning to my own room ; but Lizzy, who I be-
lieved suspected something of the kind, followed me closely,
drove me into my room, and locked my door for the night.

My health had now become extremely enfeebled ; I could
not sleep except when utterly prostrate from long wakeful-
ness ; nature could hold out no longer.

It was my practice to stuff cotton into my ears to deaden
the sounds of the terrible shrieks which came from all direc-
tions. But the cotton had not power to solace even one brief
hour, for the dreadful sounds would find avenues to my ears.
I thought I must either become insane from the long pressure
upon my brain, caused by these influences, or must die of
brain fever, so terrible was the pain in my head.

312 MODERN PERSECUTION .

As a last resort, in my persistent endeavors to counteract
these influences, and thus protect my sanity, I used to rise in
the night, from my recumbent position, and sit up with these
large wads of cotton bound tightly about my ears, at the same
time vigorously pressing my head and face downwards to
divert the blood from the cerebral veins. I had already begun
to experience symptoms of congestion of the brain.

One night while much distressed by such apprehensions, an
unusual lassitude crept over me, and ere I was aware, was
actually lost in the sweet unconsciousness of slumber.

I was not in heaven, though, in this enviable hour of rest,
I dreamed I was there, but in the midst of my rapture over
the thought that such a lingering death as I had been suffer-
ing, was now indeed " swallowed up in victory," lo ! a fierce
and rapid succession of far other sounds than " the songs of
the redeemed," convinced my reluctantly waking eyes that I
was not yet, as I had hoped, " on the other side of Jordan! "

" Oh God ! Oh God ! let my tormentors be swallowed up
forever in the lake of fire and brimstone ! "

Shouted with terrific loudness, a young sufferer of about
twenty years of age. Her room was but a few feet from my
own. She continued with vociferations of this character, as
long as she had breath.

Before this song was ended, it had awakened and excited
another patient opposite, who, angry to have her temporary
sleep thus disturbed, screamed out :

" Yes, I mean to send McFarland's soul to hell ! There it
shall be roasted and burned for thousands, millions, millions,
trillions, trillion years ! "

This, too, was many times repeated, as she emphasized and
prolonged the first syllable, " M-i-1-l-ions — M-i-1-l-ions ! "

Thus this aged woman and the young girl, the fiercest in the
hall, tortured my brain, and in the same way almost every
night of my stay in this ward ; till in my iron determination

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCE. 313

not to become myself insane, I actually discovered a method of
effectually fighting against Dr. McFarland's seeming decree
that my sanity should become annihilated !

I relate it for the benefit of any readers who may possibly
be placed in similar circumstances.

Finding that sleep was out of the question, with such a jar-
gon about my head, I resolved to neutralize the effect of such
sounds by reversing the current of their ideas ; by calling to
my aid with a violent effort of will, opposite ideas. Sitting up,
erect in my bed, with as loud a voice as I could possibly com-
mand, to help to drown these opposite voices, I repeated
passages of the most beautiful and attractive poetry I had ever
learned in former years.

These daily distractions, added to the intense mental exer-
tions of these my midnight labors, had now perfectly pros-
trated my health.

One morning my attendant missing my presence at the
table, called to my room, and said :

" Ain't ye up yit ? "

" I am sick, Elizabeth, please excuse me, I cannot go to
the table, and do not wish to eat."

Perceiving my inability to rise, she brought me a plate of
baked pork and hot biscuit !

I thanked her, but declined telling her it was impossible to
eat it.

She seemed angry, though my manner to her was perfectly
gentle as it had ever been. She hastily responded :

" The rest on 'em don't complain ; its good enough for 'em
they think ; un its good enough for ye too, so ye'll eat that or
git nothin."

I preferred to " git nothin."

I then very mildly asked her if she would bring me up a cup

of weak tea without sugar, if that was not convenient, a glass

of cold water. She replied:
14

314 ^MODERN PERSECUTION.

" If yee's to good to eat sich us the rest on 'em eat, I won't
bring ye nothin more."

So shutting my half-door with a bang, she left me.

But as it seems " my time had not yet come to die," I rallied
and in two or three days, again became able to leave that bed
of pain, and go out into the hall. But as neither rest nor
safety was to be found there, I again went to my room.

Here, being so weak, the intrusion of the noisy was more
annoying than ever ; being now unable to either amuse them
or attract them out of my room, as I nad often done before.
They would persist in pulling over everything in the room,
then in the same manner, would examine my person, put their
hands into my pocket, and feel of my head, making themselves,
in spite of the best efforts I could make to get rid of them,
most disgustingly familiar.

They would overhaul the work, which even here, I still tried
to do ; often taking away parts of it, causing much disturbance.
In other moods of mind, they fancied me their enemy, and
would inflict punishments like Lizzy Bonner, on their own re-
sponsibility.

Sometimes they would strike me suddenly, knock me down,
and often spit upon me, either in my face, or upon my hands
or garments, as suited their convenience. Sometimes they
annoyed me still worse by trying to pull my clothing from my
person, declaring it was theirs, and I had stolen it from them.

Now in my present condition of weakness, I ventured to
humbly ask her to lock me up alone in my room in the day
time, explaining how they annoyed me, and promising if she
would comply with my request, that I would help her again
about her work all I could, as soon as I was well.

But she refused, saying :

" What business had ye to be here then ? ye ain't crazy, un
ye must have been ugly, or yur friends wouldn't put ye into
sich a place as this, I ain't a goin tu run round ahter ye, un ye

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. Sib

needn't be complainin iny more to me. If they kill ye, *tis
likely ye deserve it."

So I concluded that though locks and keys were always
ready to be used against me, yet never could they be used for
my protection or advantage.

Therefore, as now I could not defend myself from their fury
while sitting up, and feeling very sore and lame, from their
blows, I felt no longer able to fight so unequal a battle, and
now retired to my bed in the day time, covering myself as
closely as possible, to protect my head from the danger of their
blows.

My attendant did not allow such indulgence long, but soon
ordered me to :

" Git'up5 and not muss up the bed in the day time."

I rose mechanically, and once more, with but half an armor,
endeavored to win my desperate way.

So, on and on I struggled daily, never for a moment losing
sight of my original determination to learn all the mysteries
of " Lunatic Asylums ! "

Whenever I walked from my screen-rooom to my meals,
to the wash-room, indeed anywhere, I had to " watch there-
fore" how I should step, in order to escape some of the
" dangers" which, in the language of a well-known religious
poet, " stand thick o'er all the ground, to push us to the
tomb."

If I went too near an old lady, Mrs. Triplet, who always sat
in one place by which I was obliged to pass on my way to
meals, she would brandish her arms and curse and swear
loudly, threatening to kill me.

If, in my attempts to escape her, I came too near another
on the opposite seat, (both of whom spent most of their time
sitting on their, seats) the latter would discharge a load of
spittle, which she had previously prepared for my reception,
into my face, or about my person.

316 MODERN PERSECUTION,

So I was each moment obliged to study how to so adjust my
steps as to escape this Scylla and Charybdis. I found it neces-
sary also to appear to be careless, and to conceal from all the
fact of my using such vigilance. I did literally walk in a
straight and narrow way.

My position here constantly reminded me of that locality,
so graphically described by Bunyan, the " Yalley of Humili-
ation," where Christian, at every step encountered " gins,
traps, pits and snares."

These were ever menacing my progress, and often caused
me internally to exclaim :

" Why am I made to possess months of vanity, while wea-
risome nights are appointed unto me!"

But " there is an end to all earthly things," it is said, and
I here add my testimony that there is also an end to some
unearthly things."

CHAPTER XLVIII.

Mrs. Olsen's Eighth Ward Experiences.

"According to previous arrangements of Mrs. McFarland and
Lizzy Bonner, it was now officially announced in the hall, that
the latter was to take about fourteen of her patients up to the
Eighth ward in a few days.

This of course created a great sensation, and the query be-
came general:

" Who is going ? Is it I ?"

So, while yet unable to sit up all day, I joyfully emerged
with the rest, and in due ceremony, we were conducted to the
very highest part of the building.

Our ascent to the Eighth ward occurred in the morning.
When the dinner hour arrived, and I again saw the tranquil
beaming face of my beloved friend, Mrs. Packard, I longed
to throw myself into her arms, and weep with joy upon her
bosom.

She was affected in the same way as were many others re-
specting the abusive treatment to which the patients were sub-
jected. Yet she did not see the worst forms of this cruelty.
The attendants dared not in her presence perpetrate these.

She honestly expressed her feelings both to them and to the
officers on this subject. When her eloquent, yet intensely gen-
tle and tender voice was raised in the defence of the suffering
ones around her, every other voice was hushed.

We all knew she " was a host " in herself, and many of the
" insane " possessed yet sufficient sanity to recognize in her
their future deliverer.

The hand of this, our dear friend, was ever ready to admin-
ister acts of beneficence, so far as her restricted privilege would

318 MODERN PERSECUTION.

permit — her voice to soothe, to cheer, and to sustain — to en-
courage the desponding and indolent to energetic activity and
self-respect, and to intellectual and moral elevation. The sick
delighted to grasp her hand, when she was permitted to visit
them, and deep were the murmurings when this privilege was
not allowed.

Such an ardent lover of truth, so heroic a defender of princi-
ples— dear as her own life — I never saw outside these walls. The
boldness with which she reproved tyranny and the thrilling
eloquence with which she defended the cause of suffering
humanity, were truly " a terror to evil doers !"

No one was so popular in the whole institution. Without
ever being intrusive, she drew all eyes, all ears, in every
circle.

At balls the most aerial dancer ; in labor, the most indus-
trious, in all public gatherings or private circles, " the ob-
served of all observers." The wonderful power she possessed
over the minds of others drew all to her ample heart, with an
irresistible magnetism. When she came into our hall, every
hand, eye and heart, were open to receive her.

I never saw one, who took the least notice of anything, who
after having seen her once, did not wish to. see her again.
When we suffered any unusual abuse, it was very often
said :

" I'll tell Mrs. Packard of this."

We knew our rights would find an able advocate in our firm
and gentle friend.

Doctor and Mrs. McFarland were much annoyed by these
demonstrations of the fact that Mrs. Packard was so much
more popular than themselves ; and this annoyance was un-
doubtedly the reason, that shortly after the accession of the
patients from the lowest prison, to her ward, the privileges of
Mrs. Packard were materially abridged.

The restrictions to which she was condemned, were very

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 319

severe — sufficient to exasperate the gentlest mind. Yet they
could not ruffle her undaunted spirit, or change to a frown the
sublime tranquility of that heaven-sustained soul.

To my astonishment and joy, at dinner, the day we en-
tered the Eighth ward, Lizzie Bonner said to me :

" Mrs. Olsen, you can have your seat at the table next to
Mrs. Packard." >

I did not dare even to thank Miss Bonner, or to show any de-
monstration of my joy when this most delightful decree was
announced, but quietly took my seat.

Here, for a few weeks, I had the privilege of eating without
fear that my brains would be knocked out, or that any other
episode from dinner, such as some one's upsetting my plate, or
laying her hair into it, or crowding or sneezing, or anything of
the kind.

Mrs. Packard and myself conversed in very low tones, so as
not to disturb any one, and not to permit our attendant 1o
suspect that we were particularly happy. Our meal hours
were the most pleasant hours I enjoyed, for with my sweet
friend by my side, I forgot that the potatoes were always cold,
the meat often tainted, and butter no longer visible.

Mrs. McFarland now avoided Mrs. Packard as much as pos-
sible ; not only declining to show her the least sympathy, but
utterly refusing to speak to her.

Though the latter could never be accused of ever breaking
any of the thousand and one rules of our key-holders, and
yielded, no- less than myself, implicit obedience to all their
commands, yet, she was accused by the matron and one of the
most obsequious of the attendants, of being " very trouble-
some !"

I believe she was " very troublesome," to some of Satan's
kingdom ; since she persisted so firmly, not only in giving no
cause for offence, but in exhibiting, so far as the most blameless
life could do so, all the " peaceable fruits of righteousness."

320 MODERN PERSECUTION.

But it troubled the adversary much to know that she spent
nearly all her time writing in her own room, some " mischief,"
they had reason to fear, might come of it, " Othello's occupa-
tion " might become endangered.

It had been discovered by the " powers that be," that her
alliances were becoming quite too numerous for the enemies'
forces. She was now securely entrenched by fortifications
erected by the warm friendship of numerous partizans ; and
the daily accessions to her party were a signal of defeat to the
enemies' forces.

Indeed we all felt that we had been drawn into a regular
civil war with the Institution !

All the seventy patients in the Eighth ward who took the
least interest in anything, sympathised with Mrs. Packard ;
and, so far as I could learn, every attendant, both male and
female, in the Asylum, defended, and very highly respected
Mrs. Packard.

This state of affairs created increased apprehensions in the
camp of the enemy. Something must be done. Our potent
commander, after holding a war-council with several of his
allies, the chief of whom was Bonner, the Prime Minister, now
issued officially from his " sanctum," a new and startling Pro-
clamation. It was this :

" All intercourse between Mrs. Packard and the inmates of
the west division of the Eighth ward, must be prohibited ex-
cept under strict guard of an attendant ! Mrs. Packard must
not be allowed to go into the hall, except when accompanied
by an attendant. She is to hold no more prayer meetings,
lend no more books, and those she has lent must be imme-
diately returned."

This Proclamation was met in our hall with silent hisses of
execration. Some, however, were far from being silent. A
few swore loudly on the occasion, and prayed very loudly for
a fresh instalment of curses upon the head of Dr. McFarland.

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 321

As for me, I wept more bitter tears than any I had ever
shed there, knowing that now my life was to be deprived of
almost its only earthly solace.

In a very few days I was suddenly ordered to leave my seat
at the table next to Mrs. Packard, and take a seat at another
table in the same hall by the side of an old lady who was
known to be the fiercest and most dangerous of all the female
patients in the Asylum ! She had been recently conducted
from the prison below.

I met this terrible order without trembling, but with a deep
and inexpressible indignation, that of course was voiceless. I
left my table immediately, without a word of demurring, and
took a seat, as ordered, by the side of this fierce woman.

About this time all our rules were rendered much more
severe than ever. We were seldom permitted to go out of
the house at all ; some were never allowed to go, but were
kept constantly in close confinement. These were harmless
patients too.

Rides were also prohibited. The balls were suspended, and
only a very few were permitted to attend the chapel services.
Company was also kept out ol our ward for a long time. We
were not allowed private conference with each other, and all
who did not render instant obedience were severely punished.

I often saw Lizzy Bonner pull* patients into their private
rooms and shut the door after them. Then I would hear her
beating them, and the latter screaming, and in a choking,
stifled voice, begging :

" Oh, Don't kill me ! Don't kill me ! "

I did not let the attendant know I heard this.

One patient had become so disgusted with life under such
circumstances, that she determined to destroy it by starvation.
She had been a long time in close confinement in her own
room alone. I many times knew that Lizzy was using violence
upon her person, throwing her heavily upon the floor. She
14*

322 MODERN PERSECUTION.

persisted in her resolve on suicide till she became emaciated
almost to a skeleton ; for many weeks taking neither food or
drink except by force.

Her resolution thus to die was at last overcome by the fierce
pains of hunger. She now was glad to eat, and a terrible re-
action ensued. Her long abstinence had made her so fiercely
hungry that it seemed she would devour everything she could
reach. After eating as much as was assigned to the rest, she
would clutch the food from the other patients, and devour it
with the most terrible voracity.

But all were glad to see her eat, thinking she had now
abandoned the idea of suicide. She now came constantly to
the table with the rest, and behaved so mildly for several days
that all were confirmed in the hope that she might yet live
and recover.

One day at dinner, she startled every one at the tables, by
suddenly seizing a knife and cutting her own throat !

Oh, I will not attempt to describe the terror of this scene !

The wound, however, was not so deep as she intended to make
it ; the knife was immediately taken from her bleeding throat,
and she was led to her room and again put into a straight-
jacket in solitary confinement. But no one, as yet, had ever
heard her speak a word in that hall.

This was the first attempt at suicide I had seen at Jackson-
ville. There were many others, some successful, in different
parts of the house as I heard by attendants and others, but
I am only describing scenes that fell under my own observa-
tion. .

Another unfortunate actually threw herself from a high un-
barred window in the work-room, four stories from the ground,
and was taken up dead from the pavement.

She had been there only a few days, and it appears had no
knowledge of the place. I saw her when she arrived.

She was mild and gentle, conversed intelligently of her

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 323

husband, and of the home she had left ; expressed a strong
desire to return to it again.

Every thing she saw seemed so very strange to her, and the
severe restrictions so mysterious to her frightened sensibilities,
she thought herself in a worse house than she indeed was, if
such a thing is possible.

They wanted her to increase the number of gratuitous labor-
ers in the work-room ; took her there, and required her to go
to work with the rest. She sat down and looked distressed,
at last rose up suddenly, and exclaimed with a voice and look
of terror :

"Oh, what kind of a place have they brought me to ! "

Then rushed suddenly head foremost from the window, into
eternity ! Oh, Reign of terror ! Reign of terror !

Scenes of tumult and terror now so frequently succeeded
each other, that no one felt that life was safe. With nothing to
afford hope — no avenues to the world — no amusements to re-
lieve the ever thickening horrors of such a destiny, a look of
fixed discontent now sat on every countenance.

At this time, one, bolder than the rest, by some means
escaped, and attempted to run away. The alarm was given,
and the " watch-dogs " were out. By these she was speedily
overtaken, forced back to the Asylum, and condemned to soli-
tary confinement as her punishment.

Two others ran away not long after this scene. One was a
widow, a young and very beautiful lady of excellent talents
and a very cheerful disposition. She was not insane as I
could discover at the time, though much dejected by grief for
the death of her brave and much loved husband who had died
in the army.

Soon after hearing this afflictive intelligence, she became
ill with a fever, and this was probably, as is often the case,
accompanied with temporary delirium. He friends, not know-
ing how to treat either the fever or its consequent delirium,

324 MODERN PERSECUTION.

which they thought insanity, found a convenint way of get-
ting rid of their responsibility, by handing her over to the
care of " our accomplished Superintendent," to receive her
three hundredth share of his attentions. (There are three
hundred in the Asylum.)

Here it had been her destiny to remain for many months ;
and feeling very anxious for the welfare of her children at
home, and moreover, being indefinitely put off by the most
silly excuses, and reprehensible delays, she at last assumed the
responsibility of asserting those rights which nature had given
her of finding and taking care of her own babes.

She was accompanied by a kindred spirit, another widow,
whose husband had also laid down his life upon our bleeding
country's sacrificial altar. Neither was this person insane
that I could discover ; I believe she was several times the sub-
ject of some harmless trances. But I think she did a very
sane action in trying to free herself from bondage.

Their plan succeeded so well, that, after traveling six miles,
they were overtaken by a kind hearted teamster, who by the
request of the now much wearied travelers, took them into
his conveyance, and listening sympathetically to their truthful
tale of distress, carried them on their way until overtaken by
their remorseless pursuers.

On their return, one of these was sentenced to one of the
lower prison wards, and the other brought to our hall in the
Eighth ward.

Hers was a most courageous spirit ; she even smiled on en-
tering our hall, determining to disappoint her victorious captors
by showing herself unrevengeful, and in no wise bowed in
spirit, or humiliated !

Therefore, instead of complaining that she was deprived of
all her privileges in the privileged Seventh ward, and sentenced
to the noisy tumults of the maniac's ward, she daily evinced
the most pleasant and cheerful deportment.

MRS. OLSEN'S EXPERIENCES. 325

Mrs. Davis was very beautiful and musical, and withal a
decided wit ; so benevolent too, so unaffectedly kind that she
would often relate some amusing story, or use her most
musical and enchanting voice by singing for the entertainment
of the desponding, when her own heart was full of unutterable
sorrow for her own griefs. If this cheerful and most noble-
hearted woman was " insane," I wish every woman in the
land possessed such an " insanity ! "

But with all her heroic attempts to throw off the benumbing
influence of affliction, she did suffer most keenly in mind at
her disappointment in not being permitted to see her darling
children.

This feeling, together with the over-exhaustion of so long a
walk, soon brought on a fever. I used every morning, and
many times in the day to visit her, that I might assist her if
possible, and also learn from her those beautiful lessons taught
by her trusting faith and hopefulness.

As she lay, day after day, on her bed of suffering, surrounded
by the noisy and filthy, of whose annoyances I never knew
her to complain, I had never beheld a more perfect example
of patience.

But 1 burned with indignation at the ignorance of a com-
munity, in the very country her husband had fought and died
to protect, that his beloved young wife could not herself be
protected from such shameful abuses as those she suffered here.

A few weeks after her recovery, she went home. Could
she have gone at the time she had started, or previously,
instead of being punished in prison for thus braving danger
for the love of her children, she might have escaped the fever.

Our reign of tern r augmented to such a degree, that I did
not deem it safe to enter the dining-hall, even when the door
was left open, for a glass of water for the suffering Mrs. Davis,
without humbly asking liberty of Lizzy to do so !

At last one of our number, a very intelligent married lady,

326 MODERN PERSECUTION.

made the following proposition, namely : That we should
make a general onslaught or campaign against the State's
property, and in various ways, destroy all we possibly could
without discovery. Thus we should make apparent to our
persecutor, that this most desperate movement was but the
natural and legitimate result of his own extreme severity to
his victims — that it was the complete desperation of our cir-
cumstances which evolved this " military necessity.''

Let those who may blame us for acting upon this, remember
that we were fighting fcr our lives. Compelled as we were to
inhale the poisonous gases from so many diseased bodies while
sleeping so near each other, and the still deadlier exhalations
arising from typhoid and other fevers, ulcerated lungs, and
fetid sores, all confined in one hall ; we felt, that between the
above influences, and the sudden blows and violence which all
the time menaced us, by the fierce maniacs and their fiercer
keeper, that our lives were most essentially imperilled.

Our liberty, even the liberty of speech and writing had all
been taken away, and we wished for emancipation from this
inexorable thraldom with an agony of desire that none but
the victims of such a bondage can ever appreciate.

We all felt ourselves hotly pursued by the enemy. Only
the wild and reckless scarcely dared to breathe. They indeed,
like the mad Saul of Tarsus, in his fruitless attempts to
destroy Christianity, dared to " breathe out threatening^ and
slaughter," not against Christ, or any of his followers, but
against our asylum prison-keepers, and their abettors in the
unjust embodiment of State Legislation.

CHAPTER XLIX.

""Wives and Husbands There Must Part."

" Returning from a walk one day with others, I observed,
on coming up the long flight of stairs, a scene which gave my
feelings a severe shook. The attendant evidently did not
wish us to see this, for she kept hurrying us along to our
hall, but the circumstances were such we could not help it.

A husband who that morning had made a brief visit to his
wife, was then taking leave of her. She failed to recognize
the propriety of being left, and wished to return to her home
with her husband. She entreated him, with tears that ceased
not flowing, to let her go home and see her children.

" Oh husband dear, do let me go home ; I don't want to
stay here any longer, it don't do me any good, I must go !
Oh, I must live at home with you and my children. Dear,
dear husband ! Do not leave me here ! "

The husband hesitated, looked at her streaming tears, then
at the door — he lingered — there was an evident struggle in
his mind.

The agitated wife perceiving his indecision, seizing the
advantage, took his arm within her own, and embracing him,
exclaimed again, in tones of agony :

" Oh husband, I must go home with you ! Do not, do not
leave me here ! "

Several of the officials of the asylum were standing near,
the husband had evidently been receiving instruction from
them instead of his own conscience.

Then with one violent effort, he disengaged himself from
the trembling grasp of the pleading wife, left her and walked
hastily down the stairs.

328 MODERN PERSECUTION,

Iii her anguish she sank down powerless upon the floor,
and was dragged by two men, still gazing after her husband's
receding form, to all the horrors of locks, keys, and imprison-
ments !

We all returned to our hall in sadness and silence, the at-
tendant left. When we found ourselves unwatched, one said :

" Oh, how could that man have the heart to leave her, when
she so begged to go with him ? "

Another replied, that " he had been befooled by the Doctor,
who had told him it would not be safe to take her home."

Said a third, " What a fool a man must be, to let another
man judge between himself and his wife ! he ought to have
known himself whether she should have gone home. If he
wanted to go and attend to his affairs, he ought to have con-
sidered that she had the same right, for his home duties and
her own were the same."

Another spoke with apparent disgust, in her turn, to the
last speaker.

" Do you think such husbands possess the faculty of consi-
deration ! I don't agree with you, it appears to me that all
their own consideration, all their faculty of independent
thinking, has become weakened, if not destroyed, when they
give up to the stupid prejudice that another man can better
guide a woman than her own husband ! "

Said another voice, " now they will call this poor woman
noisy and excited, say it hurts her to have her friends visit her,
because she cannot help crying and grieving about his leaving
her ; then they will put her down into a lower ward, where of
course she will grow worse, and may become incurable. Yes,
this is the way they do here ; I wish the public knew it."

aMy God!" echoed yet another hitherto silent voice, "it
makes me shudder to think how many splendid minds are
made incurable lunatics, or worried into a sickness which ends
in death, by just these barbarous means ! "

WIVES' AND HUSBANDS' PARTING. 329

At this stage of the colloquy, our attendant re-entered the
hall. The conversation here ended, hut our thoughts did not
end. The stupid thoughtlessness with which a husband can
commit to other hands, the wife of his bosom, when distracted
or enfeebled in body or mind, is utterly unaccountable.

No one would trust a valuable horse to be stabled without
knowing something of the treatment he would be likely to
receive. Would you, farmers, commit one to strangers of
whom you knew nothing beyond the fact that they are public
stable-keepers ? Would you send even a horse to a stable, and
permit him to remain for months and even years without
visiting, or at least sending some one to visit the animal?
Would you not fear he might be cheated out of the proper
quantity of oats or other food — that he might be exposed to
contagious diseases from other horses in his vicinity, or that in
some way his value might be diminished ? Would it be a safe
experiment thus to commit even a horse to the mercy of for-
tuitous influences ? How is it then, that you give less care to
your tender wife ?

Did you tell her, when a lover, that you could not engage,
in all future circumstances, to give her as much attention as
your animals should receive ?

Was it among your lover's vows, in your sacred moonlight
rambles, that if she became insane, you would desert her —
that you would love and cherish her, and share her destiny
" till death us do part," on condition that she would retain
her youth and beauty unimpaired ; but that, if these, or if
health or reason should fail, you would consign her to some
other man ?

Oh, no, such was not your sacred vow !

What did you promise her ?

I was not there listening under the hedgerow ; I did not
witness your sacred vows before marriage ; I only witness how
you fulfill them afterwards !"

CHAPTER L.

How to make Incurables.

" One day a patient received a letter from her aged mother,
in which the latter entreated her to write, in these words :

" Let me know without delay, if you are alive. I hardly
know if I have a daughter, it is so long since I have heard
from you."

The daughter showed this letter to me, and with overflowing
tears, besought me to use my influence with the Superintendent,
that she might be permitted to answer this letter.

I told her I had no influence whatever with the Superintend-
ent, but would try to procure the consent of Doctor Tenny to
let her write.

I also exhorted her to be watchful over her own conduct,
and try to control the occasional vagaries of her mind ; in
short, to use every possible endeavor to preserve her sanity and
her patience.

She made the most commendable attempts to do this for
several weeks, and my hopes were sanguine respecting her.

I first saw her in the Fifth ward. She was walking the hall,
pale, haggard, hopeless, and constantly biting the ends of her
fingers. Her dress was ragged, her hair uncombed, and her
whole appearance indicated a mind on the verge of despair.

In this condition I first tried to open to her the avenues of
hope. In the absence of our attendant, at stealthy conversa-
tions, I discovered that she possessed excellent talents, was a
good scholar, and had formerly moved in an elevated sphere
of life.

She was the only daughter of a physician ; had in early life
married a man of wealth and ambition, with whom she had
lived happily for several years, and who had loaded her with

HOW TO MAKE INCURABLES. 331

comforts and luxuries. Subsequently, the tide of her fortune
was reversed ; misfortune came with swift and heavy shocks,
upon her devoted head. Her affectionate father was laid in
the grave. She lost her husband, to whom she was most
tenderly attached, by the most terrible of all deaths, the death
of his affections for herself.

Won by the fascinations of another, in an evil hour, he had
deserted her forever, leaving three helpless babes upon her
care, with no means of support. One by one these lovely
children had all been laid in their graves, and the mother was
left in the terrible loneliness of the heart's deepest desolation.
No wonder the energies of her mind at last gave way ; that
the haunting images of her heart's lost treasures were ever
before her eyes. Her health sunk, she was unable longer to
combat successfully the tide of her terrible calamities.

In this crisis, her own brother, instead of being her com-
forter, blamed her for not retaining the perfection of her
energies, and turned against her in the most heartless manner.
She now became unable longer to baffle adversity, and having
no pecuniary resources left, was reduced to the necessity of
accepting a home in a miserable county alms-house.

Some time after leaving the Asylum, I went into the vicinity
where these events occurred, and after diligently inquiring,
found all the statements of her history she had made to me,
corroborated.

In my first interview with her, observing how she had lacer-
ated her fingers by constantly gnawing them, in her agony of
mind, I suggested :

"Now let me wrap up your fingers, and I want you to prom-
ise me not again to put them in your mouth. Will you
solemnly promise this, and keep your word ?"

She complied, and I soon procured some rags, and bound up
her bleeding fingers.

" Now," said she, " I want you to make a promise to me."

332 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" "What is it ? most happy should I be to do anything pos-
sible to relieve your condition."

" Oh, promise me," she entreated with earnest emphasis,
" that you will never speak to me, nor take the least notice of
me in the presence of Lizzie Bonner."

" Why should I promise this ? you possess an intelligent
mind, an immortal soul, you have been a great sufferer, and
still remain so. I dislike to treat you with disrespect or neg-
lect in the presence of any one."

" If Lizzie sees you trying to make me happy, she will feel
reproved because she has never done so herself. She will hale
and ill treat you worse than she does now ; and more than
that, she will separate us, and thus deprive you of all oppor-
tunity to carry out your kind intentions respecting me."

I saw in this response, so much sanity, and gratitude ; so
much in her mind worth cultivating, that it confirmed my de-
termination to benefit this most deeply suffering woman if
possible.

I cannot here recount the experiments I tried to aid her in
bringing back to its full triumph, her wavering reason and
self-control. My success astonished myself ; I felt almost cer-
tain she would recover.

Respecting the letter Mrs. George so earnestly wished to
write to her mother ; with much difficulty, I had procured a
sheet of paper for my own use ; this she begged of me, and
wrote upon it a very sensible and affectionate letter to her
mother. No fault was found with the Asylum, or with the
fact of her long sufferings there, but she gave the idea that
though she had been much disordered in mind, she hoped she
was now improving ; that she trusted she had acquired a good
degree of self-control, and thought she could now return to
her mother and make both happy.

Doctor McFarland soon after appeared in the hall. Leading
Mrs. George to him, I ventured to say, in a very respectful tone :

HO W TO MAKE INCURABLES. 333

" Doctor McFarland, I am happy to believe this person now
fully clothed in her right mind. She has desired me to present
a request to you, in behalf of herself and her mother, but I
think her better capable of stating her own request, if you
will please to listen to it.

I then withdrew a little.

Mrs. George modestly advanced, and said in a very defer-
ential tone :

" Oh, Doctor dear, will you please be so very kind as to let
me send this letter to my poor feeble mother, if after having
read it, you think it proper. She is getting quite old, and I am
afraid, may not live the coming winter through. I have caused
her much grief, and if I could only be with her, I think I
could do much to make her happy. Please Doctor, grant my
request, and I will be grateful to you as long as I live*"

The Doctor barely deigned to hear this humble supplica-
tion, then turned his back, without a word, and left the hall.

I had so often witnessed such replies to similar appeals, that
I felt not the least surprise, but I much feared the effect of
such a repulse upon the sensitive mind of his patient.

She had for several weeks, been making the most energetic
effort to govern her own mind. She had struggled nobly and
successfully to repress the natural rising of indignation, when
she had been abused by her keepers, tasked, beaten and re-
proached for not being able to quite fulfill the severe exactions
in the toiling drudgeries every day assigned to her.

With unrepining patience, this child of grief had borne all
these indignities, supported by the hope that she should again
taste the sweets of liberty and affection with her beloved
mother. I had watched with the greatest pleasure, the pro-
gress she was making in the few hours of leisure that were
allowed her in reading and needle-work.

But now, a shock too great for her to sustain, was given by
the Doctor's most heartless repulse.

334 MODERN PERSECUTION.

A few days subsequent, a marked change for the worse came
visibly over her mind and manners. She saw how fruitless
were all the efforts she had been able to make for her own re-
covery, and again sank into gloomy discouragement.

She now laid aside her needle and her book, neglected her
personal appearance, began to pace the hall in morose silence,
tearing little bits of paper, and again biting her fingers.

In vain I remonstrated ; in vain attempted to rally the now
departing gleams of reason.

She seemed to have a perfect consciousness of her own peril ;
indeed told me she knew she was on the road to destruction.
I sought in every way I could think of to divert her mind,
urged her by every possible motive to try to recall hope, and
still cultivate patience.

" No, no, it is all in vain," said she, with a look of tearless
despair. " You cannot raise me, so little power as you have
here. They keep me working most of the time in the wash
and ironing rooms, I've made up my mind now, that they
mean to keep me here forever, I shall never see my mother
any more ; never again know the joy of liberty. Oh, I wish
I were dead."

Her descent was rapid ; a short time after, she tore to shreds
every article of clothing upon her person. Her attendant put
her at once into solitary confinement.

This did not mend the matter, she broke the glass, mutila-
ted the furniture, broke the crockery in her room, and with
the sharp fragments attacked her attendant, and wounded her
severely in the arm.

Lizzy quickly locked her door and ran to me, holding up her
bleeding arm, requesting me to bind it up for her.

I did so, but pitied her victim more than herself.

As soon as she dared, she again opened the door of Mrs.
George and called me to look at the scene.

What a spectacle ! Never saw I more complete debasement !

HOW TO MAKE- INCURABLES 335

or more perfect abandonment of all decency in human
conduct ! She was shouting, swinging her arms, laughing
triumphantly and horribly ; swearing, dancing and screaming,
alternately.

She was led to the wash-room, beaten and washed, then
straight-jacketed and tightly bound by cords to a stationary
bench in the public hall.

While sitting here upon the bare floor, she kept constantly
uttering the most profane, blasphemous expressions against
herself and all around her, against God and nature, heaven
and the universe !

The young patients stared in perfect horror at her terrible
transformation. Her words rolled in perfect torrents from her
mouth so long as she had power of utterance.

Then she foamed at the mouth which was followed by ges-
ticulations and motions so indecent, as to forbid all attempts
at description. She became so intolerable, that every patient
left that part of the hall, and huddled back into the remotest
places, unable longer to endure her vicinity.

Her room was close to my own. Her nights, like her days,
were spent in raving and shouting :

" Oh, curses, curses on Dr. McFarland ! Oh, my mother,
my mother ! Oh, my ruin ! my ruin ! "

These were the noises with which I was tormented all the
long hours of those terrible nights ! Again I feared for the
continuance of my own sanity, so almost impossible was it to
obtain any sleep.

Every particle of decency and of humanity now seemed to
have forsaken my once hopeful friend. Her countenance in
its contortions had wrought out of itself almost every human
feature.

It was remarked by one of the patients, that she now looked
more like a baboon than like a human being. In a few days,
she was removed to the Fifth ward. She is doubtless now, if

336 MODERN PERSECUTION

living, ranked among those who have by such a process oeen
manufactured into incurables.

Not far from this time, one of the keys of the hall was
missed. Lizzy suspected Miss Hodson, the industrious sewing
girl from the Fifth ward, and questioned her.

She denied having taken the key, but was not believed.

Then commenced the most shocking scene of injustice I had
ever beheld.

Lizzy insisted that Miss Hodson was guilty of the theft, and
commenced searching her room, in every nook and corner.
She scattered the bed all over the floor seeking the key. It
was all in vain ; it was nowhere to be found.

She next accused Miss Hodson of having secreted the key
about her person.

This was also denied.

Lizzy then hastily tore off all her clothing, till the helpless
victim of such diabolical indecency, feeling a just indignation,
wrought up to the highest climax of rage, fought the attend-
ant with most terrible desperation.

Seeing the contest doubtful Lizzy shouted for reinforce-
ment ; her fellow attendant came instantly to the rescue.

Then both seized their victim, the one holding her arms,
the other actually kneeling upon her body and beating her
furiously, vociferously shouted :

M Now tell where you've hid that key ? "

Lizzy then pounded her on the bowels and head, kicked her
furiously, and in the progress of the battle, tore out her hair,
and beat her nose heavily against the floor, raising her head
up and down rapidly by the hair

The sufferer now ceased all resistance ; she became speech-
less and as I thought, insensible.

Lizzy, to extort the expected confession, then ordered the
other attendant to bring a pail of water. I looked on in dumb
horror as I then saw those two attendants plunge the bruised

HOW TO MAKE INCURABLES. 337

head of that motherless orphan into the water, and hold it
there till she strangled convulsively gasping for breath.

She was now speechless, motionless and naked, they then
applied a straight-jacket to her unresisting arms, locked her
into a room, and left her !

I beheld this whole scene without daring to remonstrate,
having been many times punished for trying to excite pity for
the victims when under these modes of torture.

These injuries of Miss Hodson I think were incurable.

She never, while I remained, did any more work for the
Institution, but would sit or lie on the floor of her own room
mostly, brooding over her unrequited wrongs, in melancholy
silence.

After the terrible scene I have related, she never was known
to converse socially with any one. By swift degrees, she ap-
peared to lose all hope ; at last she became a furious maniac.

I think they have made her an incurable, if, indeed, she is
living.

I ought to add, that a few minutes after the perpetration of
this outrage, the lost key was found in the shoe of a Mrs.
McClay, a patient who had made several attempts to run
away.

The attendants did not give Mrs. McClay the least punish-
ment. I thought it was because they were too much fatigued
in fighting Miss Hodson ! Justice ! !

I did not tell the Doctor of this scene. Why should I ? I
knew that he perfectly well knew that similar scenes were
every day occurring in different parts of the Asylum/ "

Here ends my extract from " Mrs. Olsen's Prison Life.''
My own narrative is resumed in the succeeding chapter.

15

CHAPTER LI.

I was Punished for Telling the Truth.

The power of truth is irresistible, and disturbs this hidden
nest of iniquity. I make no side thrusts through fear of the
" powers that be," knowing that they are wicked powers that
cannot harm me, because held in check by the Highest. And
so long as I do not prove traitor to this Highest Power, I can
claim protection under it.

But the first compromise with these hidden powers of evil
cuts me off from all claims to the protection of the higher
constitution.

They try to make themselves believe that it is slander which
I utter when attacking the evils of this house ; still they know
them to be sad truths, which they would vainly deny, and re-
proach me, the medium, as insane, hoping thus to render my
testimony nugatory. Did they see I attacked only fancied
evils, they would not be thus disturbed by my testimony.
But since they know it is real, tangible truth, which I speak,
their consciences accuse them, and in despair they are driven
to seek this means of quieting them.

Could they only make me act as they have made Mrs.
Farnside act, they would be relieved of an intolerable burden.
Then they could tell of my own actions in support of their
theory of my insanity, without telling in connection with
them the great provocation which elicited such a mode of
defensive action.

Mrs. Farnside was subjected to an ordeal which she could
not sustain. She fell into a passion before this temptation,
and under the influence of this temper, she lost her dignified
self-possession. She descended from the plane of lady-like

PUNISHED FOR TELLING THE TRUTH. 339

resentment, to their own low plane of brutality, and acted
then like her tormentors.

Thus she put herself in their power, so that they can now
say of her that " they were afraid of her," just as she had
had reason to say of them, that " she was afraid of them ; "
and for this very reason she had to defend herself from them.
Although there is precisely the same reason for fear in both
cases, yet, Mrs. Farnside bearing the brand of insanity, has
to be represented as dangerous on that account, while their
own insanity, although more marked, is entirely left out.

So in this hidden den of iniquity, the innocent do suffer for
the guilty actions of their keepers.

Seeing at a glance the artful workings of this hidden mode
of treatment, I determined to face the enemy in open opposi-
tion to the " powers that be," assuming all the consequences
to myself or others ; therefore I became a staunch advocate
and defender of truth and justice, being extremely careful
however to be just to myself, while trying to be just to others.
That is, I was careful not to put myself in their power, by
coming on to their plane at all.

From this higher platform of principle, I could look down
upon them on their lower plane of passion, policy, deception
and brutality, and from this standpoint, command the moral
courage to be their reprover, and their reporter to the world.

They envied my position and determined to take my fort
by strategy, since open attacks had proved so unsuccessful.
Their chagrin at their hitherto signal defeats had become
exceedingly embarrassing, and as their machinery had
hitherto proved successful in almost every other instance,
they were very loth to abandon the siege.

It was for this reason I was kept so long, and made to feel
the force of all the combined powers of this dark house of
darkest deeds, before they would abandon the siege against
this impregnable, invincible fortress of calm self-composure.

340 MODERN PERSECUTION.

They feared me, not because I would fight them as Mrs.
Farnside did, but because I would not fight !

It was for this reason Dr. McFarland wrote to my friends,
in the heat of these battles :

" Mrs. Packard has become a dangerous patient, it will not
be safe to have her in any private family ! "

And Mr. David Field, of Granville, Illinois, wrote in reply
to this information, and very respectfully inquired what evi-
dence I had given in my own actions of being a " dangerous
patient."

When he insolently replied, " I do not deem it my duty to
answer impertinent questions ! "

He knew that it would be " dangerous " to have me in any
private family long, for then they would find out what he had
discovered, that 1 was an uncompromising defender of truth
and justice, and such weapons he feared, and might well call
them " dangerous " to his interests in the hands of a free
woman !

He knew too well, that no bribes, no threats, no punish-
ments could throw me from the track upon which I had chosen
to pass my earth life. And since I had baffled his skill and
gigantic powers in this attempt, he was sure the only safe
place for such a woman, was behind the dead-locks of an
insane asylum !

Mrs. Chapman told me one night at the dance, that she
had inquired of Mrs. McFarland why they did treat me so
abusively, so unreasonably, so persistently evil.

To which she replied, " It is because she slanders the house."
I replied, " there is nothing so cutting as the truth ; they
have become convinced that I am a fearless truth teller ;
therefore they fear me. She is at liberty to prove my repre-
sentations slanderous and false, if she can, but she is not at
liberty to defame my character to disprove them."

She then added, " I have also consulted Dr. Tenny about

PUNISHED FOR TELLING THE TRUTH. 341

your case. I said to him, how can you treat Mrs. Packard as
you do ? it would drive me distracted and dethrone my reason
entirely, to be put through such a process ; and then to per-
sist so long, in so abusing an innocent and injured woman, is
beyond all precedent ; how can you do so ? "

" I am only a subordinate — I cannot help it," was his reply.

I then told her, " Mrs. McFarland has been an angel of
consolation to me ; when I was so exceedingly sorrowful,
before Miss Smith's discharge, she actually shed tears of pity
for me, and did try to raise my dying hopes, by assuring me
I might hope her husband would send me home before long."

" Yes, she can talk sympathy, but why don't she do some-
thing for you ? Talking sympathy is not what you want ;
you want to be treated as your character deserves to be
treated."

" Mrs. McFarland did say she could not help my being
placed among the maniacs, to be subject to their injurious
treatment, but she said she would send me something occa-
sionally from their own table. And she has done so. Once
she brought me under her apron or in her pocket a tumbler of
jelly and a teaspoon to eat it with. And another time I had
a quantity of loaf-sugar and lemons and a pitcher of ice-water
sent into my room from their kitchen. She also consented to
Mrs. Coe's bringing me good things from their kitchen, or
anything else she chose to bring, for my comfort. And Mrs.
Coe has availed herself of this right, and brought me apples
in abundance, raisins, oranges, and prunes, some of which she
bought with her own money. She brings me strawberries
and sugar, cherries and melons, which Mr. Jones, the Super-
intendent of the asylum farm sends me, by permission from
Mrs. McFarland, so that through her influence, I have my
sorrows lessened perhaps as much as it is possible for her to
do, under the circumstances. Indeed, since Mrs. Coe has
been our cook, and this license given her, I have hardly been

342 MODERN PERSECUTION

a day without some extra luxury, such as fruits, cakes, and
confectioneries. Now I think this is " doing something."

" Yes, it is a comfort to be thus cared for in your now for-
lorn condition, but that is not restoring you to your family
and society, as you ought to be."

" No, it is not, but the hope of being so, is next to the frui-
tion, and Mrs. McFarland has held this hope before me as a
solace by saying :

6 1 can assure you the Doctor will never consent to take
you ink) this institution again ; you may settle your mind
upon that point, and I think the Doctor did very wrong to
listen to Mr. Packard so much ; and he ought to have sent
you home long ago ! ' and such like rays of hope."

" But I sometimes think, Mrs. Chapman, that I have felt
more impatient since she inspired this hope than before. I
have been like the soldier so long trying to keep down an
inordinate desire to see my children once more, a free
woman, that the least probability of the closing of the campaign
almost fills me with ecstacy, and each blighting of a hope of
this kind seems harder and harder. Another thing I have
found, Mrs. Chapman, to be indispensable to my support, is
to keep myself constantly employed, that my mind does not
prey upon itself. My heart is so keenly alive to emotions
and impressions, that a track is necessary for me to move
upon, or it might become morbidly sensitive if left to itself.
I therefore conscientiously employ each hour according to a
set plan for systematic employment. And in this too, I am
aided by Mrs. McFarland, for she lets me buy cotton knitting
yarn by the pound, and as much muslin as I want to em-
broider bands and trimmings of any style I choose. And I
am accumulating an immense amount of embroidery for my
own and my daughter's under-clothes, expecting, as you see,
to live in the world a long time yet to need it ! "

" Yes, the bow of hope is always to be seen in your horizon."

PUNISHED FOR TELLING THE TRUTH. 343

" Is it not well to have it so ? "

" Yes, if you can — but were I in your situation I think I
should give up in despair."

" What would that accomplish ? "

" Nothing, but to let them see the wreck they had caused !"

However her argument failed to dispirit me. Indeed I felt
stronger for her sympathy, and determined to let matters take
their natural course, believing that the dark riddle would be
sometime made plain to my comprehension.

I was now suffering what I was put in to receive — a " dres-
sing down " for daring to speak the truth respecting the
Church dogmas.

And now I must not turn back, but face this new enemy I
have called into the field, by boldness of speech here — and
must endure my punishment for telling the truth about the
insane asylum dogmas.

Yes, I am being " Punished for Telling the Truth ! "
And God grant I may never escape from this calaboose of
torture, by recanting the truth respecting creeds or asylums !

CHAPTER Ln.

The Prisoner Who Called Himself
u Jesus Christ I"

One evening at our dancing parties I was introduced to a
fine looking young man, with whom I held a very agreeable
and intelligent conversation, wherein 1 failed to detect any
indications of loss of reason, or mental unsoundness. Know-
ing that he was a new arrival, I, of course, looked for some
mental aberration, as his passport to the privileges of our in-
stitution.

But having signally failed, after the most searching scrutiny,
to detect the slightest title to this claim, I began to fear here
was. another smuggled victim of some evil plot. The longer
I conversed, the more confirmed was this suspicion.

Determined to pursue my investigations on this point, I
sought and found his attendant, and inquired what was the
character of the insanity of this young man.

He replied, " I am as ignorant as you are, Mrs. Packard,
on that point. I have watched him with the closest scrutiny
ever since he was entered, and have entirely failed to detect
the first irregularity in any respect. Indeed he is the most
kind, obliging and exemplary person I ever saw, and as for
sympathy and tenderness towards the patients I never saw it
surpassed in any one."

" I fear we have another bogus candidate for the honors of
this institution," replied I, " for I am sure that so far as in-
telligence and reason are concerned, he is a most unfit person
to receive the brand of insanity."

" That is my opinion of his case thus far," replied his at
tendant, " and yet I may be able to detect some peculiarity

THE PRISONER, "MR. JESUS CHRIST!" 345

upon a longer acquaintance ; still from his appearance during
the weeks he has been under iny care, I should judge he was
the last person who ought to be put under a lock and key."

"I very much fear he is another of the many victims of
unjust persecution, sent here by those who employ this Insti-
tution to shield their own crimes, for there is evidently guilt
somewhere in entombing such a promising young man as he is.
Won't you please ascertain if you can, what are the facts in
the case, and tell me at our next party ? for I am making ob-
servations and seeking facts for a book on this subject."

At our next party I accordingly pursued these inquiries, and
found that, although he had been on the most vigilant search
for facts on which his imprisonment was predicated, he had
found nothing that could afford any solution to his mind of
this dark mystery. He more than confirmed his previous
defense of his entire sanity, by adding :

" He is the most forgiving, kind, tender sympathizing person
I ever saw."

" Yes/' thought I, " here is doubtless another instance
where there is too much Christianity for this perverted age to
recognize, and therefore he must be offered in sacrifice upon
this altar of insanity. Can it be that men as well as women,
are imprisoned here, because they exhibit too much of Christ's
spirit ? I will find out whether this brother in bonds is of
this class."

With these thoughts I met my new friend, and extending
my hand, said :

" Good evening, Mr. , I don't recollect your name."

" My name is Jesus Christ ! "

"Jesus Christ!" thought I, greatly taken aback — I knew
not what to say — Oh, this is your insanity, this is your crimi-
nal offense, doubtless — but how is this ? I am determined
never to call a person insane for the utterance of opinions,
merely, no matter how absurd— but here is an opinion where,

346 MODERN PERSECUTION.

I fear my philosophy will be balked — my principles are not
going to stand this test !

With these thoughts, I ventured to pursue my investigations,
and recollecting how reasonable and sensible he had appeared,
I asked him in reply to this introduction of himself:

" But how is it, Sir, you can call yourself ' Jesus Christ/
when he is the Son of God, and came to earth, and was here
crucified for sinners ? "

" Oh, I am not that Jesus Christ, but another Jesus Christ ! —
he is my oldest brother, and I being of the same family bear
the same name, but, of course, there can be but one oldest
brother in the great human family, any more than in any
other family. Haven't you more than one son in your family ? "

" Yes, I have five sons, my oldest is named Theophilus, my
others, Samuel, George, etc."

" Well, but are they not all Packards, the Samuel as well
as the Theophilus ? and is there any more impropriety In
calling George the youngest, a Packard, than in calling The-
ophilus, the oldest, a Packard V

" Why, no, not in that sense."

" Just so it is in God's family — all his sons are Jesus Christs
as much as the first, just as soon as they become perfectly
developed into his spirit. Such are Jesus Christs, whether on
earth or in heaven, as much as Jesus of Nazareth was ; but
they are all different persons. There is but one Jesus of
Nazareth, but there are as many Christs as there are true
perfected men. Such are all brothers bearing the same com-
mon name, after Christ is fully developed in them."

" Then you claim that the Christ is fully developed in you,
do you, and that on this account you call yourself ' Jesus
Christ?"

" Yes, I do. I consider that I am now perfect in God's
estimation, in the same sense that his oldest son was perfeet.
This is fulfilling the command to ' be ye perfect in Christ

THE PRISONER, "MR. JESUS CHRIST!" 347

Jesus ' — meaning, perfect in Christ Jesus' estimation. I am
not perfect in the estimation of the church, or the world ; but
in God's estimation, I have obeyed his command, in this re-
spect. Do you think God would have commanded his children
to do impossibilities ? and if they could not become perfect in
Sis estimation, he is an unreasonable being in issuing such a
command."

So here my " Mr. Jesus Christ " had explained himself to
simply mean that he was a perfect man. He insists that he
is not the Christ, the world's Saviour, but simply a perfect
person in Christ Jesus' estimation.

Now, where is his insanity? even his "hobby," where has
that gone?

Just into the belief of the perfectionists, as it was defended
by Dr. Finney and others of this class.

Now comes the question, shall this man be locked up in an
"Asylum" because he says he is a perfect man — in a style of
language peculiar to himself— in order to force him to abandon
his originality of expression, and become an echo of other
men's forms of expression ?

Yes, because he is insane on this point.

Insane ! because lie chooses to utter an opinion respecting
his own character in original language ! What a dangerous
person to be allowed his liberty ! Won't he kill somebody ?
for somebody has chosen to call this peculiarity insanity, in-
stead of a singular mode of expression.

Still he is dangerous, for we do not know what an insane
person might do, although his opinions of himself seems to
be true — that is — he seems to exhibit the Christ spirit to an
uncommon degree, yet he may kill somebody ! therefore he
must be locked up.

It won't do to wait until he has killed somebody and then
imprison him as we do criminals after they have committed a
crime.

348 MODERN PERSECUTION.

We must imprison this man not only before he has com-
mitted any crime, but even before he has shown the first indi-
cation that he ever intended to commit a criminal offense !

Yes, he claims that he is Jesus Christ, and so long as he
acts like Jesus Christ, he must be locked up to make him like
other people, lest he kill somebody !

Now I think if all those who call themselves " Jesus Christ,"
and act like Jesus Christ, ought to be locked up for fear they
may kill somebody, all those who call themselves " totally de-
praved," and act as though they are totally depraved, ought
to be locked up also, for fear they may kill somebody too !

CHAPTER LIH.

My First Opportunity for Self-Defence.

A few days prior to the September meeting of the Trustees,
1862, in a familiar conversation I had with Dr. McFarland
in my room, I remarked :

" Doctor, I don't like to spend my days here doing nothing ;
why can't I fire a few guns at Calvinism, before those Trus-
tees, who are to meet in a few days ? "

" Why, Mrs. Packard, they are Calvinists, and the chair-
man is a member of the Presbyterian Synod of the United
States ! "

" I don't care for that — I should not hesitate to give my views
before the Synod itself, if allowed. And besides, it is all the
better for your cause that they are, for my views will be likely
to be regarded by them as insane, because a difference of
opinion is insanity you know — on the minority side of the
question of course ! Now one, alone, against so many — and
that one a woman, too — what have you to fear ? "

This was enough. He was converted into a free and full
consent that I might " fire all the guns" I pleased at Calvin-
ism, and he would furnish me with all the paper I wished to
write my views upon.

" Now," thought he, " Mrs. Packard will unmask herself,
thus demonstrating to the Trustees that I represent her cor-
rectly in calling her insane. Yes, she'll hang herself! "

The Doctor was true to his promise, and brought me paper
himself, the first sheet he had ever given me, and I, true to
my engagement, made out the most clear, concise, and com-
prehensive view I could of the whole system of Calvinism, as
I viewed it, by contrasting each principle with the Christian

350 MODERN PERSECUTION.

principle, showing the system to be " doctrines of devils,"
instead of doctrines of Christ !

The Doctor examined my document, and finding it all right
he engaged to call for me the next day, in the afternoon, and
take me down to the parlor, where I should then meet the
Trustees.

Keeping my wardrobe in order for the dancing parties, I
easily found a very suitable summer costume in readiness for
the occasion, which, with a tasteful head-dress to relieve the
sky-blue trimmings of my white lawn dress, I made quite as
good an appearance as any one need desire.

Therefore with more of a queen-like feeling, than that of an
imprisoned slave, I took the proffered arm of the Doctor, and
was escorted By him into the parlor of these grave, dignified
gentlemen, and introduced, in the most gallant manner, first
to the chairman, and then to the other gentlemen, sepa-
rately, after which, he led me to a most conspicuous seat by
the chairman, when I withdrew my arm from his own, and
sat down.

Here I must notify my readers that there was one gentle-
man present to whom he did not introduce me, and to whom
I did not speak. But, as I afterwards learned, he did speak
of me, and of the impression made on his feelings, as he saw
me so politely escorted into the room by the Doctor, in these
words :

" I never saw a lady look so sweet and attractive as she did ! "

Now I will introduce the gentleman to my readers as Eev.
Mr. Packard, the husband of this lady.

The chairman, Mr. Brown, then addressed me in these
words :

" Mrs. Packard, we have heard Mr. Packard's statements, and
Dr. McFarland has informed us that you have something you
would like to say to us. We will allow you ten minutes to say
it in."

MY FIRST SELF DEFENCE. 35X

Taking out my watch and looking at it, I remarked to the
Doctor who sat opposite me :

" Please inform me when my time is up, will you sir ? and
I will stop at any moment you designate."

Nodding his consent, I commenced reading my document
with a clear, calm, distinct voice, to a silently attentive audience.
So profound was the silence, I could almost hear the joyous
pulsations of my own heart.

On, on, I went, assailing fortress after fortress of the Cal-
vinistic creed, and notwithstanding the havoc and devasta-
tion, thus caused by the skillful use of the weapon of truth
and common-sense, still was tolerated. Neither did my time-
keeper inform me that I was trespassing upon the limits
assigned me, although my ten minutes were soon lost in fifty
minutes before our interview terminated.

Having finished my " Exposure of Calvinism and Defence of
Christianity," I was emboldened by their toleration to ask
another license, which was, permission to read another docu-
ment which I had clandestinely prepared and taken with me,
but which the Doctor had never seen.

That this license was most cheerfully and readily granted,
was indicated not only by an unanimous hand vote of the
Trustees, but also by the accompanying exclamations :

" Let her go on ! Let us hear the whole ! "

In view of this generous and cheerful response, I playfully
remarked :

" I should think appearances betoken that I am in the ele-
ment where freedom of opinion is tolerated."

" We don't know about women thinking as they please !
We must look after them" responded Mr. Club.

He was promptly silenced, however, by the noble " woman's
right's" Miner, remarking in a very decided tone:

" Go on ! Mrs. Packard— Go on ! "

After thanking friend Miner for his generous defence, I

352 MODERN PERSECUTION.

proceeded to read my unknown document to equally attentive
listeners.

This document exposed " The Conspiracy" of their Super-
intendent and Mr. Packard against my personal liberty, in as
bold and uncompromising terms as my exposure of Calvinism
had been given in. Still I was tolerated !

The Superintendent and the Minister listened in mute
amazement to this dauntless revelation of the truth and their
own guilt. Without denying one of my statements, or offering
a single apology, Mr. Packard left the room at the request of
the Trustees.

The Superintendent soon followed.

The Trustees now acted the part of cross-questioning attor-
neys, while I their witness, was secretly exulting in the oppor-
tunity thus afforded me, of making further revelations of the
depth and magnitude of this malign conspiracy.

The playful, easy style and manner in which I made my
statements, seemed to dissipate the sanctimonious gravity of
this august body — so that they came to seemingly regard me
as one of their number, instead of a culprit under the grace
of court ! They manifested a willingness to do anything and
everything I asked.

Mr. Brown told me that he saw it was of no use for me to
think of returning to my husband, assuring me he now under-
stood that my incarceration had been obtained in consequence
of my using my reason, instead of losing my reason !

He kindly offered to send me, independently of Mr. Packard,
to my children at Manteno, if I thought best to go ; or, they
would pay my passage to go to my father in Massachusetts ;
or, they would pay my board in Jacksonville, if I chose.

In short, I could have my liberty to do just as I pleased, as
they were satisfied the Insane Asylum was no place for me.

Of course, I thanked them most sincerely for this offer of
liberty — to me the most blessed boon of my existence, adding :

MY FIRST SELF DEFENCE. 353

•
" Gentlemen, it is of no use for me to accept this offer at your

hands, for although you acknowledge by this act that I have a
right to my liberty, yet, you have no power to protect this
right to me — for since I am a married woman, I have no legal
protection of my person, or any of my rights, only as this pro-
tection is guaranteed to me through the voluntary act of my
husband. The law does not compel him to protect or support
me outside of an Insane Asylum, if he only chooses to claim
that I am insane. This charge from my husband, even before
it is proved against me, annihilates all my rights as a human
being, not even excepting the right of self-defence from this
charge. But on this, his single allegation, confirmed by the
signature of your Superintendent, he can lawfully imprison me
for life in this, or some other Insane Asylum. No father,
brother, son or friend, or even our Governor himself, has the
power to protect the personal liberty of any married woman in
this State, while such a law exists on Illinois' statute book.
There is no protection of my personal liberty under the
American flag, so long as Mr. Packard lives, therefore I may
as well spend my days in this prison as in any other."

The Trustees replied, " We pity you — it is a hard case — we
never before realized how defenceless a married woman was
under our laws — but what can we do for you ? Is there any-
thing ?"

" Yes, gentlemen, there is one thing you can do, and only
one that I can see, by which you can exonerate yourselves from
complicity in this transaction, and at the same time confer a
great favor upon me, which is, to furnish me with a key, or a
pass, by which my personal liberty would be in my own hands,
rather than in your hands as it now is. I might continue to
stay for the present, as I have done, subject to the rules of the
other prisoners, in all other respects, except that of being my
own keeper. I have felt it my duty to protest against my false

354 MODERN PERSECUTION.

imprisonment, and have, thereby, shut myself up more closely
than the others are, for in my protest I said, ' I shall never
return a voluntary prisoner into the wards,' neither can I
do so, for I regard this vow as sacred. Indeed, I cannot now
even return to the wards voluntarily, without a key or a pass.
And if you force me back, it is you who are imprisoning me,
and on you must hereafter rest the responsibility of being
accomplices in this conspiracy."

They did not give me a key, nor a pass, neither did they
request Dr. McFarland to do so, but thus compelled the
Superintendent to carry me back in his own arms, as was the
case.

But they did confer upon me the right to advise with the
Doctor, assuring me I might do as he and myself could agree
it was best to be done.

Accordingly, the following day the Superintendent called
upon me in my room, and introduced the subject by saying :

" Well, Mrs. Packard, the Trustees thought you hit the
mark with your gun 1"

" Did they ? Was that what they were shouting at, after I
left the room ?"

"Yes, it was ; for I told them that you wished 4 to fire a few
guns at Calvinism.' "

" I knew, Doctor, that I had put in a heavy charge, but I
determined to risk it, and improve my chance lest I should not
get another. I somewhat feared it might burst the cannon !
but it did not ; for I see none of them believe me to be an
insane person, after all."

" Mrs. Packard, won't you give me a copy of that document,
for what is worth hearing once, is worth hearing twice."

" Yes, Doctor, I am perfectly willing to do so, for I should
like you to have a copy, and the Trustees also, and I should
like my father to have one, and my early friend and teacher,
Rev. Henry Ward Beecher, and some others of my Orthodox

MY FIRST SELF DEFENCE. 355

friends. But it is very irksome for me to copy. How would
it do to get a few printed in handbill form, and send them to
my friends ?"

"I think it would be well to do so, and I will pay the printer.
You re-write it, and add to it what was said, and I will see
that it is done, forthwith."

" Do you mean to have both documents printed ? The Ex-
posure of the Conspiracy, also ?"

"Yes, the whole ; and anything else you may choose to add."

" Well done, for Dr. McFarland ! If you are going to give
me such liberty, I shall feel that I am a free woman ; and this
may possibly prepare the way for my liberation."

The paper was faithfully furnished by the Doctor, and T,
with the most elastic feelings which this hope of deliverance
inspired, went to work to prepare my document for the prin-
ter. But before twenty-four hours had elapsed since this liberty
license was granted to my hitherto prison bound intellect, the
vision of a big book began to dawn upon my mind, accompa-
nied with the most delightful feeling of satisfaction with my
undertaking. The next time the Doctor called, I told him that :

" It seems to me I must write a book. The thoughts and
their arrangement, are all new and origina7, until suggested
to my mind by this sort of mental vision. What shall I do,
Doctor ?"

" Write it out just as you see it."

He then furnished me with paper, and gave directions to the
attendants to let no one disturb me, and let me do just as I
pleased.

I commenced writing out this mental vision, and in six weeks
I penciled the substance of " The Great Drama," which, when
written out for the press, covers two thousand five hundred
pages of note paper.

Can I not truly say my train of thought was engineered by
.he " Lightning Express ?"

356 MODERN PERSECUTION.

I had no books to aid me but Webster's large Dictionary, and
the Bible. It came wholly through my own reason and intel-
lect, quickened into unusual activity by the perfect state of my
health, from the most persistent conformity to the laws of
health in eating, sleeping, and exercise, and by the inspiring
hope of coming freedom. The production is a remarkable
one, as well as the indicting of it, a very singular phenome-
non.

If, during my life-time, this "Great Drama" can be published
and not imperil my personal liberty, I shall be happy to give it
to the world.

But until that time arrives, when an original thought can be
spoken or written, without incurring the charge of insanity for
such an act, my personal liberty is only safe, while this manu-
script is hidden from the age in which it was written.

CHAPTER LIV

My Exposure of Calvinism and Defence

of Christianity, as Presented to

the Trustees.

Gentlemen — I am accused of teaching my children doc-
trines ruinous in their tendency, and such as alienate them
from their father.

I reply that my teachings and practice both are ruinous to
Satan's cause, and do alienate my children from satanic
influences, /teach Christianity ; my husband teaches Calvin-
ism. These are antagonistic systems, and uphold antagonistic
authorities.

Christianity upholds God's authority. Calvinism, the devil's
authority.

Calvinism befriends slavery. Christianity befriends liberty.

The kingdom of Christ and the kingdom of Satan can no
longer exist in one and the same family or government. The
time has come when the tares and the wheat must be separa-
ted ; for the harvest of the world is fully ripe.

Calvin was a bigot — an intolerant despot — a murderer.
Christ was a kind, liberal, charitable and tolerant friend and
protector to all, and the Saviour of all.

Calvin trespassed upon the inalienable rights of others.
Christ protected the rights of all.

Calvin hated with a deadly hate his Christian brother. Christ
loved with saving power his enemies.

Calvinism is treason to God's government. Christianity is
loyalty to God's government.

Calvinistic marriage requires the subjection of woman.
Christian marriage requires the protection of woman.

358 MODERN PERSECUTION.

The teachings of Christ and those of Calvin are antago-
nistic.

Christ taught there is but one God. Calvin taught there
are three Gods.

Christ taught that he was the Son of God. Calvin taught
that he was God himself.

Christ taught that the Son could not be as old as his Father.
Calvin taught that they could be of the same age.

Christ taught that he was a subordinate being, subject to
God's authority, and that he acted with delegated power as the
world's Saviour, and that when this end was fully achieved
he should deliver up his delegated authority to his Father, and
he himself be subject to him, and God would then be " all
and in all."

Calvin taught that Christ was God himself, and acted by
his own self-derived authority.

Christ taught that God was the Father of all the human
family, and as such, purposes and designs the best good of all
his children ; and he taught that he had Omnipotent power
to carry out and accomplish all the benevolent purposes of
his paternal nature.

Calvin taught that the larger part of the human family
were the children of the devil, and that he had Omnipotent
power to thwart God's purposes concerning such, and could
ensure to them eternal destruction in spite of God's intention
and purpose to redeem the whole of the human family from
destruction.

Christ taught that every sin would receive its just punish-
ment— that the law of justice was inexorable — that the only
way to escape punishment was to escape the cause of punish-
ment.

Calvin taught that the favorites in God's family would be
exonerated from this law, simply because they believed that
Christ died for sinners.

CALVINISM AND CHRISTIANITY. 359

Christ taught that punishment would continue so long as
transgression continued, that whenever repentance took place,
pardon ensued ; and that all would sometime repent, because
he had purposed to save all in this way alone ; and he taught
that death and hell would finally be destroyed, and, of course,
if the effect ceased, the cause must have ceased.

Calvin taught that the greater part of God's family would
transcend God's ability to discipline into subjugation to his
authority and obedience to his commands ; and that failing in
his ability so to do, he was determined to show his power over
them by keeping them in endless, hopeless torment, and thus,
fiend-like, manifest his despotic authority by forever torturing
his helpless victims.

Calvin taught that the day of probation terminated with
the death of our natural bodies.

Christ taught that there were no limits to God's mercy, that
he was unchangeable, " the same yesterday, to-day, and for-
ever," therefore, repentance will always remain a condition of
pardon — the free-agency is an indispensable law of our moral
nature, over which the death of our natural body has no in-
fluence— that this natural law of our physical being has no
more influence or control over the laws of our moral nature
than the natural law of eating or sleeping has over them — or,
that putting off our natural body has no more power to change
the laws of our moral nature than a change of clothing has
to change the character.

Christ taught that our natures are holy — -that all their God-
given instincts and laws are but a type of his own nature which
we cannot violate with impunity — that to disregard nature's
claim, is to disregard God's claims. And he has shown us
what these claims are by living a natural life himself on earth,
for our example. He has shown us that sin consists in
violating the laws of our God-given nature — thus depraving,
or perverting it, from its original tendencies ; that he came to

360 MODERN PERSECUTION.

restore human nature from its present perverted condition to
its original, natural state of innocence.

Calvin taught that our natures are sinful, that to live a
natural life is to live a sinful life. He taught that human
nature is our worst foe, which we must conquer into subjec-
tion to his perverted standard of faith and practice, or be lost
eternally.

Christ taught that to be baptized we must go down into the
water and come up out of the water, as he did.

Calvin taught that to be baptized we must stand up in a
house and be sprinkled.

Christ taught that to feel right we must first do right.

Calvin taught that to do right we must feel right.

Christ taught us to " overcome evil with good."

Calvin taught us to overcome evil with evil — that the first
step towards becoming better was to believe you were very bad,
and if you are too honest to say you were bad when you felt
that you were not, it was the darkest sign of guilt — so that the
upright, sincere soul felt driven to become bad, so that he
could make an honest confession of his guilt in order to secure
the confidence of his Christian brethren that he was converted.

Christ taught that to clothe ourselves with his righteousness,
was to do like him, be like him, by doing right in everything.

Calvin taught that to clothe ourselves with Christ's right-
eousness was to act contrary to the dictates of human nature
and utterly repudiate obedience as a meritorious act, or as a
reason why we should be acquitted and justified in God's
sight, and depend wholly upon the merits of Christ, entirely
independent of our own ; or, in other words, to continue in an
unnatural state, depending upon a soveregin act of God to
appropriate the vicarious sufferings of Christ for our benefit,
independent of our accountability.

Calvin taught that the elect were all that would or could be
saved, and that these were God's children, and all others the
devil's children.

CALVINISM AND CHRISTIANITY. 361

Christ taught that all were God's dear children — that all had
good and evil in them, but that all the evil in them he came
to destroy. And that for this purpose, he had elected some
of his children and capacitated them by peculiar sufferings
and trials to be co-workers with him for the good of the
many. As if a father should bestow peculiar advantages upon
one child, that he might be fitted to be the educator of his
other children. This is " The economy of grace."

I believe that with these, his educated company of sanctified
ones, who have come out of great tribulation, such as he
endured on earth, he will make such assaults upon Satan's
kingdom as will ensure its entire overthrow and destruction.

I believe that this reign of Christ on the earth, with his
elect co-workers, is about to be inaugurated ; and that these
troublous times are only the day of preparation for a better
state than has ever been experienced on earth. The clouds
which precede this bright, millenial day, will soon be dispersed
by the Sun of Righteousness ; and that a kingdom is about to
be established, which shall never be destroyed.

Then will the great work of redeeming a lost world com-
mence, with accelerated power and efficiency.

Christ, with his chosen band of purified ones, will then
make practical the beneficent, self-sacrificing principles of his
unselfish nature, so that no inveterate foe to His government
and reign — not even the stoutest Calvinist — will be able then
to resist, effectually, any one of his benevolent plans to save the
whole class of Calvinists from endless torment, by leading
them to bow to his sceptre, and become kind and tolerant
towards others, as Christ and his followers are toward them.

I believe that all who have died unsanctified, will live again
on the earth, where their surroundings will be so favorable,
that they will be able to live natural lives, and, in this manner,
take the first step to a higher spiritual life. For God says,
with no exception, i* First the natural, then the spiritual."
16

362 MODERN. PERSECUTION.

And the poor deluded Calvinist, who has been led to despise
nature, will not be found to have committed a sin too great
for his benevolent Sovereign to pardon, on the ground of late
repentance.

I believe that some incorrigible Calvinists may compel God
to punish them one thousand years in what, to them, is endless
torment, before they will be willing to renounce Calvin's
creed, and adopt Christ's creed — " to do unto others as they
would wish to be done by " — in its stead.

The sum of my practical theology is contained in the fol-
lowing stanza :

" With cheerful feet thy path of duty run,

God nothing does, nor suffers to be done,

But what thou wouldst thyself, couldst thou DUt see

Through all events of things as well as He."

Reflections.

1. This impious, Calvinistic attempt to chain my thoughts,
by calling me " insane," for opinion's sake, and imprisoning
me on this account, is a crime against the constitution of this
free government, and also a crime against civilization and
human progress. For who will dare to be true to the inspira-
tions of the divinity within them, if the pioneers of truth are
thus liable to lose their personal liberty for life, for so doing?

2. The law by which I am imprisoned, which entirely de-
prives a married woman of the primeval law of heaven — the
right of self-defence — is a Calvinistic law, since it conflicts
with the gospel — the golden rule.

3. This notorious family rebellion, is the legitimate fruit
of the Calvinistic law of marriage, which enslaves the wife.
And the only cure for it, is legal, constitutional emancipation,
based upon the principles of God's government, which demand
liberty to aU.

CALVINISM AND CHRISTIANITY. 3(53

4. This kidnapping intelligent moral agents of their account-
ability is the climax of all human wrongs to which Calvinism
gravitates. An imprisonment as a criminal does not begin to
compare with it in cruelty — since a criminal is regarded as an
accountable being. He is not locked up to be deprived of the
Godhead within him ! His capacity to become a guilty, wicked
person, is allowed him — and this capacity, even with guilt at-
tending it, is less to be dreaded, than a feeling of annihilation
— an extinction of human capacities and being.

Gentlemen, I claim ability to defend every sentiment herein
advanced by sound argument, and I pledge myself ready now
to do so, either in an extemporaneous defence, or a written dis-
cussion. And I will engage to write a volume in their defence
and have it ready for publication at your next meeting, if you
will be so kind as to furnish me with paper to write it upon..

It would be the greatest luxury to me, to thus be able to
improve this opportunity, to advance the cause of truth and
righteousness on earth, so that when called to give an account
of my earthly stewardship, it may appear, that while numbered
with the incapacitated, useless members of society, I did
what I could for the cause most dear to my heart.

Dr. McFarland, please to accept my most grateful thanks
for permitting me this privilege of presenting some of my
most radical views of religious truth before the Trustees.

Gentlemen, Trustees of this Institution, as your friend, I
advise you to follow the dictates of your individual consciences,
God's secretary within you, in performing the part Providence
has assigned you in this great drama. Remember, gentlemen,
we are a free people, and every citizen living under this Gov-
ernment has a right to form his own opinions, and having
formed them, he has a right to express his individual opinions
wherever he may think proper. And whosoever seeks to
imprison him because he does this, is a traitor to that flag
and the cause which it represents.

CHAPTER LV.

The Dawning of a New Dispensation.

The reader will now perceive that a new dispensation has
dawned upon me — that the Superintendent is regarding hip
prisoner in the light of a citizen, rather than a slave.

And if any of my readers feel disposed to censure me for
seeming so readily to forgive this great sinner, let me remind
them that they may perhaps be better prepared to judge cor-
rectly .of my feelings if they could exchange situations with
me.

Ever since the Doctor had taken my part in the insult of
the Jacksonville aristocrats, I had an occasional cause to feel
that my happiness was not an object of such stoical indiffer-
ence to him as it formerly had been. And besides, I had
noticed that just in proportion as I had Dr. McFarland's
approval, just in that proportion was I regarded as a terror
to the evil-doer ; neither was my influence over those who
were doing well lessened by it.

Therefore, benevolence itself would prompt me to " impress "
this influence into a good cause, if possible. And with me it
has always been a settled purpose to train my own children
and scholars to do right under the influence of encourage-
ment rather than censure. I am more watchful to find out
some cause for just approbation, rather than for fault-finding.

This being my native or home element it is not strange that
I should seize with avidity the first opening bud of promise
on this barren stock of manliness, which daily passed under
my observation.

Yes, I did strive with all the charity and forgiveness I could
command, to find every hopeful sign that possibly could be

DAWNING OF A NEW DISPENSATION. 365

summoned into the exercise of encouragement to the well-
doer ; for my principles led me to despise the flatterer as well
as the slanderer — that is, I could no more praise without
cause for praise, than I could blame without cause for blame.
Both being falsehoods, I could practice neither, and it was
not possible for me to determine which evil of the two was the
greatest, therefore, I strove to avoid both.

Again, my theology teaches me that in every human being
there is a soul to be redeemed. That in every rock there is
a well. Could I not, therefore, hope that the drill of long
and patient perseverance might yet reach this spring in this
Doctor's flinty heart ?

Yes, I had my hope quickened into a spasmodic life that the
latent spark of manliness in this hardened sinner, might yet
be developed into the strength of a vigorous life, correspond-
ing to his intellectual strength. It was my aim and purpose
thus to develop him, by the only power in the universe ad-
equate to this work, and fitted for it, and that is " woman's in-
fluence." Indeed I fully determined that in the same ratio
that he had tried to crush the womanhood in me, in that same
proportion would I raise the manhood in him. And although
my first effort for his elevation cost me banishment from the
scenes of civilization, to dwell among maniacs, yet this did
not dispirit me, nor cause me to regret the effort.

I know too, that God does not require one sinner to punish
another sinner, for he has expressly claimed the right of pun-
ishment as being his own prerogative. The Great Father of
the human family has not delegated the right to one child to
punish the faults of another — on the contrary, he claims the
right of punishment as exclusively his own.

Therefore as his child I am bound to refer to my Father,
the settlement of the wrongs I receive from my brothers and
sisters. All he allows me to do is, to do them good, that is
to defend myself by benefiting them, not by injuring them.

MODERN PERSECUTION,

Now the greatest good I could bestow upon Dr. McFarland
was to influence him to stop sinning, by doing justice towards
me forthwith. And now that he had taken the first decided
step in that direction, I aimed to urge him onward by every
possible influence.

Again, I do not feel called upon to judge of the motives of
my fellow sinners. If they act right, it is none of my business
what motive prompted the act.

For example, if Dr. McFarland allows me the right of self-
defense, and thereby secures my personal liberty, I have a
right to acknowledge the act as a good one, even if he was
compelled to do so through fear of exposure or punishment,
or even if selfish policy, and nothing else prompted him to do
this good deed.

His subsequent course has demonstrated that he had no
good end in view, so far as I was concerned, in allowing me
to write this book, but on the contrary he determined to use
the book as the means of getting me again incarcerated.

As he had allowed me to expose Calvinism before the trus-
tees, for the purpose of getting their sanction in calling me an
insane person ; so he now allowed me to write a book, hoping
thus to secure the sanction of my readers in calling me insane.
And notwithstanding the whole plot had been conceived and
executed on the principles of the most conceited selfishness,
yet, I have no right on that ground to call the act a wrong, or
a bad act. These may have been the highest motives this
hardened sinner could possibly exercise, on this low plane on
which his persistent iniquities had placed him.

And since my Father in Heaven does not ignore fear, as a
bad motive, why should I ? He says, " the fear of the Lord
is the beginning of wisdom," evidently representing this prin-
ciple as the very lowest round of the ladder of human pro-
gression yet being an agent employed by God for the sinner's
arrest in his downward course, we should not despise it, lest,

DAWNING OF A NEW DISPENSATION. 367

we thus " quench the smoking flax or break the bruised
reed."

But the caviler may say, " what goodness can be attributed
to the act of giving you what was already yours by the right
of inheritance, as a human being V Your right of self-defense
was not Dr. McFarland's to bestow, even if he did allow you
to use this right, while others withdrew from you every op-
portunity for its exercise. It was yours already. You did not
seem to feel under any special obligation to Mr. Packard for
giving you your old clothes on this principle."

No, I did not, for he was at this time beyond the limits of
Christian fellowship. I felt conscious that the law of love
required me to withdrew from him all fellowship, believing he
belonged to that class whom we are commanded to treat in
this manner, for their good. I had borne with him until for-
bearance had ceased to be a virtue ; for every act of fellowship
bestowed, only encouraged him in his course of wrong doing.
I had for twenty-one years pursued this uniform course of per-
sistent kindness, only to be trampled under his feet, for so do-
ing, and now circumstances compelled me to treat him on a
plane lower even than the fear of punishment.

From that class who cannot be moved even by the lowest
motive in human development, I feel bound to withdraw my-
self, knowing that stern justice alone can now move them in
the line of repentance, and as he had denied me the least
shadow of justice in the right of self-defense, it was now meet
that he should experience the justice he had denied me.

This was not taking justice into my own hands, it was only
leaving him to his own chosen way to work out his own de-
struction, unimpeded. All hope ol deliverance from this in-
corrigible sinner, had long since gone out in utter darkness.
He had deliberately put me off upon another man's protection,
by withdrawing his own entirely.

And I must sav that I felt a little exultant, under the

368 MODERN PERSECUTION.

thought that my entrance on the Doctor's arm might possibly
make him feel that I had found in the protector he had chosen
for me, one that suited me better than the one of my own
choice !

Here let me say to my husband, that it is perfectly natural
for me to love the opposite sex, it need not be a matter of
surprise to him if I should come to love the only man he al-
lowed me to associate with, for three years, especially if I can
find in him anything worthy of my love.

And failing to find the jewel I sought in this personifica-
tion ol a man determined to develop it, if woman's influence
could do it, and now my hopes so long buried, were just ger-
minating, and that they might perfect the beautiful buds of
promise was to me my soul inspiring business to hasten this
consummation.

Under the influence of these new and most joyous emotions
I pursued my delightful employment of writing my most novel
book.

The gallant and now gentlemanly Doctor's visits were most
welcome seasons of rich and varied interchange of thoughts,
so that my mind seemed stimulated into a new and healthful
activity from this powerful magnetic influence.

The sound of his iootsteps in the hall, and his gentle knock
at my dpor now caused my heart to bound with joy as before
it had caused a throb of anguish, to know that he was on his
way to my room, into which he would bolt the most uncere-
moniously, without caring whether he was welcome or not.

Now to be treated as a lady, in this gallant manner, by
this once boorish man, was to me the inauguration of a new
and delightful era of my prison life.

But the brightest day has its clouds, and the finest gold its
dross, as will be demonstrated in the following chapter.

CHAPTER LVI.

The Moral Barometer Indicates a Storm
— A Hurricane.

Woman's love for man is based on the principle of reverence.
We can never truly love a man who has never inspired in us
the feeling of fear, or reverence. A woman's nature calls for
protection, as instinctively as the climbing rose calls for some-
thing stronger than itself to climb upon. She can not,
naturally, cling to a nature weaker than her own, any more
than the vine can naturally climb without a stronger support
than its own to cling to.

Fear, respect, and reverence, are emotions which superiority
alone can inspire. I cannot exercise the feeling of reverence
towards a being whom I do not look up to, as to a superior.
A child cannot reverence his parent, unless that parent can
command the feeling of authority over the child. Until this
fear, or authority is established, the foundation stone of the
edifice of filial love is wanting. A servant cannot reverence
nor love his master, unless the principle of authority is estab-
lished in the master. Let the servant, or the child feel that he
can rule the master, or parent, and thus hold his authority in
his own hands, then the foundation for contempt or irrever-
ence is established.

God commands the love of all his creatures on the principle
of superiority, which inspires reverence for his authority, and
from this root, the purest, tenderest, most confiding love, nat-
urally germinates.

Woman's nature is peculiarly fitted to love such a being, feel-
ing him to be the embodiment of strength and power3 such as
16*

370 MODERN PERSECUTION.

she wants, to meet her instinctive aspirations. God tells us he
has made man in his image, and therefore, on this basis, she
turns to him as her natural protector. She finds in man, this
tower of strength and wisdom, which she, like the vine is in
search of, that she may live a natural life.

When she finds a man combining strength and wisdom su-
perior to her own, she as naturally desires this power as her
shield and defence, as she naturally desires food and sleep, to
meet a demand of her nature.

For example, my nature being endowed with the instincts of
a natural woman, has ever sought for a personified deity in a
man form, to reverence and love. This feeling was first exer-
cised towards my father, whose authority and kindness quick-
ened this latent spark into activity. His authority was the
stepping-stone to God's authority. He was to my childish
nature, God's representative, and just in proportion as I rever-
enced my father's authority, just in that proportion did I rev-
erence God's authority.

As the child, in time, lost itself in the mature woman, so the
filial love for my father became merged into a higher love of
manhood, that of companionship, as well as protection. Un-
like some children, I could not find in my father that kind of
companionship my development demanded. He ruled me still,
but not through my freedom, as my intelligence demanded.
This, therefore, stifled this confiding spirit, because it could not
act in conflict with reason.

And so it was with the feelings awakened by my husband's
authority ; he mingled with it so much of the tyrant, at the
same time denying me the protection of the man, that my
higher love was never quickened into natural life under
either influence. This great want of my nature, spiritual
freedom, was never met or gratified, until this period, when,
under the manly protection of Dr. McFarland, I was allowed
to write an independent book, free from all dictation.

STORM— A HURRICANE. 371

The awe of the tyrant was now settling into a reverence for
a mighty power, adequate to this great emergency. As he had
had almost omnipotent power to crush, so he now had this same
power to raise and defend me. The power of the Husband, the
power of the Trustees, the power of the State, had all been
delegated to him. As to the power of protection, he was all
in all to me now ; and the spiritual freedom granted to me by
this power was almost God-like.

Dr. McFarland knew that one great object in my writing my
book, was to destroy the evils of Insane Asylums, and he knew
too, that in order to expose these evils, I must necessarily
expose him in his abuse of power. Still, like the Trustees, he
tolerated the truth, sad though it was — for example :

One day he came to my room after I had just completed a
delineation of himself through his own actions which pre-
sented him in a most unfavorable light, and as I allowed him
to see all I wrote, if he wished it, I handed him these sheets,
saying :

" Doctor, what will you do when such facts come to be pub-
lished ? Can you stand before them ?"

After reading them carefully through, he remarked with a
deep sigh:

" If I stand at all, I must stand before it, — -for it is the
truth!"

Could I help reverencing a power who would thus submis-
sively and coolly take this severe chastisement from one whom
he regarded as his dependent ?

No, I could not.

I felt that here was a eulogy, a compliment bestowed in a
manly style, surpassing anything I had ever witnessed. It said
to me:

"Mrs. Packard, I can trust you — I will trust you, for you are
such a truthful witness I dare not confront you."

Yes, his fortitude, his patience, his tolerance under my

372

MODERN PERSECUTION.

castigation — severe as his own unvarnished actions made
them — really moved my pity, and led me to exclaim :

"Oh, Doctor, how coidd you compel me to write such a
hateful record ! How could you act so meanly ! How I do
wish I had no such sad truths to tell ! Now Doctor, you must
give me a chance to redeem your character as a penitent.
Won't you do so ?"

Yes, he did resolve to be my manly protector, by letting me
write just such a book as I pleased, thus trusting his character,
as it were, entirely in my hands. Oh, this trust ! — This sacred
trust — second to nothing but the ark of truth ! Under the
influence of these feelings, the legitimate offspring of such
exhibitions of manliness, I prepared the first installment of
" The Great Drama," for publication.

I told him the manuscript was ready for the printer, and
inquired if he held himself responsible to publish this, by the
first offer he had made me. Of course there was ground for
hesitation by the enhanced expense. I, therefore, offered to
write to my son and get the extra amount, to meet this
emergency.

Still he hesitated — I thought too, I could detect the old
" policy " principle coming into life again, aiming to supplant
the self-sacrificing spirit of benevolence, which seemed to be
just taking root in his heart. I trembled — knowing that my
all depended upon his continuance in well doing.

I asked wisdom. It was impressed upon my mind to write
him a letter — I did so — and as I took it to my attendant, Miss
Mills, and asked her to carry it to the Doctor's office, and
deliver it herself, I said, as the presentiment of the coming
storm came over me :

" This may bring a storm of indignation upon me ; if it
does, do the best you can for me, but don't tell a lie to help

me."

In this note I had expressed my fears, that the fear of man

A STORM— A H URRICANE. 373

was gaining the ascendency over his better nature — that in-
stead of daring to trust hinjself where the truth would place
him, as his higher nature prompted, I feared he was settling
down on to the plane of selfish policy, so beneath the noble
dignity of his nature, and I gently warned him of the conse-
quences of such a relapse, saying:

" I shall be just as much bound to expose the truth, as be-
fore; but with this relapse I cannot save you with this
cause of truth, as you will not then be the penitent, which
is indispensable to my saving you with the ark of truth.' ' In
short, I added, " If you fail to keep your promise to publish
my book, or help me to liberty, I shall feel bound to fulfill my
promise to expose you."

In about one hour from the time Miss Mills delivered the
note, I heard his footsteps in the hall, and I could also almost
hear my own heart palpitate with emotion as the step ap-
proached my door. I responded to his rap as usual, by open-
ing the door, and extending my hand, said :

" Good morning, Doctor ! "

But my salutation was not returned, and instead of accedting
my proffered, hand, he sternly remarked :

" Step out of your room ! "

" Step out of my room ! did you say ? "

" Yes."

I obeyed, when no sooner was I past the threshold, than he
pulled my door together, and locked it against me. Then
holding his key in his hand, as much as to say, " I hold your
destiny by the power of this key, and I hold too, that precious
book now in your room under the power of this key ; it there-
fore becomes you to be careful what you do ! " and standing
in front of me, he said:

" Mrs. Packard, I consider that note you sent me as unlady-
like— as containing a threat."

Pausing a moment, I replied :

374 MODERN PERSECUTION.

" Dr. McFarland, that note contained the truth, and nothing
but the truth. I promised you when I had been here only
four months, that I should expose you when I got out, unless
you repented — I don't take it back ! — I don't recant ! "

Without saying another word, he took hold of my arm and
led me gently into a screen-room, and locked me up !

This was the first time I had ever been locked in a screen-
room, and now his own hand had turned the bolt of this
maniac's cell upon me ! Unlike screen-rooms generally, this
room had a chair in it, which the patients said the Doctor
carried in himself before he came to my door.

Having of course here nothing to do, I took the chair and
placing it before the corner of tlie room, I seated myself and
tipped it back, and resting my head against a pillow I took
from the bed, tried to compose myself to sleep, knowing that
good sleep is as good an antidote to trouble, as I could then
command. In this position I quietly rested with closed eyes,
for two hours, thinking over the probable fate of my book.

" There is one part of my book," thought I, " which will
escape this destruction, for Miss Mills had yesterday taken the
first volume down to Mrs. Chapman of the Seventh ward.
The Doctor won't find this in my room, thank good fortune ! "

But I am sorry to say this part of my soliloquy did not
prove true, for the Doctor, after searching all the things in my
room, even the bedding, both of the ticks, and both of the
pillows, and not finding this book which he knew was ready
for the press, he finally inquired of Miss Mills if she knew
where one volume of Mrs. Packard's book could be found.

My kind attendant, recollecting my instruction, "Doirt tell
a lie to help me," felt bound to tell the truth, which she did.

The Doctor, therefore went to Mrs. Chapman's room and
demanded the book. She took the manuscript from between
her ticks and handed it to him.

" Now," thought I, " this paltry thief has got every scrap of

A STORM— A HURRICANE. 375

my precious book into his own hands ! besides all the other
manuscripts and all the stationery of every kind, which I had
in my possession that he could find."

But thanks to a good Providence, my entire journal escaped
this wreck. Although the greater part of it passed through
his fingers, yet he knew it not !

It was all rolled up in small, separate portions, in the
different articles of my wardrobe, and as the Doctor handled
over each and every article of linen in my trunk, he little"
thought that the contents of this book then passed unobserved,
through his fingers, by being wrapped up in these articles, and
fastened by a pin ! Had he removed one pin and thus found
•one roll, he would, doubtless, have removed all the pins, and
thus found them all. But it seems the Doctor's curiosity was
satisfied with the examination of a lady's wardrobe, without
looking to see with his own eyes the style of embroidery upon
her linen !

After this general overhauling of my things, it seems the
Doctor was not satisfied, for he then went to every female em-
ployee, and in the most excited state they had ever seen
their Superintendent, asked them the question he had asked
Miss Mills, viz. :

" Do you know of any place where Mrs. Packard keeps her
papers ? "

None, except Miss Mills, were able to inform him on this
point, for my prudence did not allow me to- make a confidant
in these matters, of any person in the house, not even after
the new dispensation had been opened upon me ; for I knew
that it is not all gold that glitters, and possibly this gold
which I thought I had found in the Doctor, might not stand
the smelting process to which I knew it must yet be subjected !
I now saw the wisdom of granting to great sinners a " day
of probation," before taking them into " full fellowship ! "

When my " new convert," had got through his " backsliding

376 MODERN PERSECUTION.

business, he came in my room, and unlocking my door found
his prisoner as quietly sleeping, to all appearance, while this
wrath cloud of indignation was expending itself about her, as
if she had no responsibility of any other person's actions
resting upon her except her own.

I opened my eyes, and said to the Doctor who stood in the
open doorway looking at me :

" Can I come out now ? "

"Yes."

" Can I go to my room ? "

"Yes, of course."

He then followed me to the door of my room, and as he un-
locked it and disclosed to my view the empty box upon the
floor, which two hours before contained my precious book,
and my bed and toilet articles presenting the appearance that
my room had had a crazy occupant in it since I left it, I
turned my eyes from that sad scene to his face, and simply
said, in a quiet, soft tone, as I laid my hand gently upon his
arm :

" Doctor, never fear ! — God reigns ! — This will all work
right!"

CHAPTER LVH.

The Clouds Disperse.

This sudden tempest which had just passed over the moral
horizon of my earthly destiny, had in its violence left my
earthly prospects a complete wreck. Nothing tangible was
now to be found to rest my troubled soul upon. If it were not
that my anchor had been cast within the veil, and found there
a firm foundation to rest it upon, this foundering bark of my
earthly destiny must have become a perfect wreck.

But, thank God ! this refuge of faith failed not, and thus I
stood unharmed. Even my peace and composure of soul never
forsook me for one hour, but on the contrary I and my friend
Mrs. Olsen, seemed to be the only hopeful ones in the Asylum,
as to the effect of this moral hurricane. From every part of
this spacious house I could hear that the wail of pity for me
was being expressed in language as various as the sources
whence it came — I received many of the most tender messages
of sympathy suited to the emergency.

But in one particular all agreed that I should never see my
book again.

" It is lost ! forever lost — as to your ever seeing it again,"
was the great unquestioning fact on which their sympathy
was predicated.

Since I kept my own secrets in more than one particular,
these sympathizers did not know on what ground I built my
hope, when I assured them all :

" I shall get my book again ! He will return it to me ! He
will not burn it ! "

Was my prompt decided response, to their kind and generous
sympathy.

This was to them a mystery they could not fathom, and I

378 MODERN PERSECUTION.

must add in truth to myself, that it was almost as much so to
myself. But like Abraham, I felt that my darling book would
in some way be saved, as was his darling Isaac. And, like
him, I only knew by the assurance of faith in God's promises.

I knew that whatever I lost for truth's sake would be re-
stored to me fourfold. I had deliberately exposed my book to
save Dr. McFarland's soul ; that is, I was willing to probe deep
into this sinner's corrupt heart, lest the " hurt be healed
slightly," and therefore I told him plainly the consequences
of backsliding, hoping thus to hedge up the way against it.

But instead of this, the sunlight of truth caused these buds
upon the house-top to wither and decay — the resolution of
holy obedience had not yet found the good soil of firmness
and moral courage to take root in, so as to make it a principle
of permanent growth.

But what must now be done ? Must he be left as an incor-
rigible sinner, past all hope of redemption ? My faith said :

" No, try again."

I did try again, and when the next morning he came his
usual rounds, and found me sitting in my room quietly sewing
with my door wide open, and my room full of patients listen-
ing to my conversation for their entertainment, I arose to meet
him at the door, and as I extended to him my hand, I said,
with a smile :

" Doctor, will you shake hands with me this morning ? "

" Oh, yes — yes — most certainly."

And at the same time took my hand and while he held it, I
remarked in an undertone, with my eyes resting upon his
hands :

" Doctor, the Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away,
blessed be the name of the Lord ! "

After gazing at me in amazement for a few seconds, and
saying by his manner, " of what kind of material are you
composed ? " At length he said :

THE CLOUDS DISPERSE. 379

, " Why, Mrs. Packard, your book is all safe."

" Of course it is safe, in your hands, Dr. McFarland ! "

He then passed on, considering what ground his prisoner
had for reposing so much confidence in her keeper, especially
after he had proved so untrue and so unmanly to her.

" Is she determined to make me worthy of trust by trusting
me?"

Yes, so it was, and as I knew it to be a law of our nature
that we are apt to become what we are taken to be. I knew
the best way to make a man of this being, was to bestow upon
him the trust and confidence of a woman, hoping thus to in-
spire again the latent spark of manhood, which was now pass-
ing under another eclipse.

The next time when he found me alone in my room, I asked
him to sit down and let us talk over matters a little. He did
so, and I asked him the question :

" Doctor, which is the most lady-like or Christian-like act ;
to ruin a person by exposing them without warning — or to
warn them first, and thus give them a chance to escape the
exposure by repentance ? "

Seeing the self-condemnation the answer involved, he chose
silence as the better part of valor this time.

I then tried another question :

" Doctor, which would be the most chivalrous act, for a man
to keep his promise to a lady whom he had promised to protect
— or to take a defenseless woman, and by an act of might, lock
her up in a room where she could not defend herself at all, and
then rob her of all her valuables ? Would it be a noble, and
manly act, to treat a woman who had never harmed you in
this manner ? Just make the case your own, Doctor ; suppos-
ing a man should take you from your office, and lead you into
a room and lock you up, and then with secret keys should ran-
sack your valuables, and all your private notes and papers of
the greatest value to you, and then claim them as his own —

380 MODERN PERSECUTION.

what would you call such an act ? Would you think there
was much honor to boast of in that kind of use of the power,
might gave him over your rights ? "

Getting no replies, and choosing not to harass my con-
demned culprit too much, I next remarked :

" Doctor, when I consider what a valuable soul there is to
be redeemed in you, and then resolve to try one more effort to
secure its safety, this passage is often presented to my mind,
6 of some have compassion, making a difference : others save
with fear ; pulling them out of the fire.' But Doctor, I have
to go so near the fire to get hold of you, that I get burnt my-
self sometimes ! "

At this point he threw back his head and laughed outright,
seeming not to know what to say, but by his looks and man-
ner he seemed to say :

" You are an anomaly I cannot comprehend."

By a series of lectures of a similar character, this poor sin-
ner was at length brought to see and realize, the meanness of
the act, and with a feeling of self-abhorrence and self-condem-
nation, in about three weeks he sent back my papers, unasked,
with an apology for not having done so before !

He also withdrew his order to my attendants, to not let me
have any writing materials whatever,, and now ordered them
to aid me in every possible way in granting me facilities for
doing so.

It was thus under the auspices of a cloudless sky, I again
resumed the delightful work of preparing " The Great Drama "
for the press, and under the benign influence of a cloudless
manhood I henceforth pursued my onward way. The moral
victory thus achieved, increased rather than diminished my
spiritual freedom.

The anxious Superintendent became satisfied that it was
useless to try to comfort me in the line of my duty. He saw
that no policy but that of moral rectitude could secure my

THE CLOUDS DISPERSE. 381

sanction — that no fear, but the fear of sin, could conquer me
into subjection to any human power, so that this final con-
quest over the principles of despotic power brought his prin-
ciples of selfish policy to a final end, so far as his treatment
of me was concerned.

I never could ask any man to treat me with more deferen-
tial respect than Dr. McFarland uniformly did from this
time. And here let me credit to this man the compliment, I
honestly think is his due, viz. : that there are few men who
are able to excel Dr. McFarland in his gentlemanly appear-
ance when he feels disposed to assume the gentleman.

Now every noble manly act of protection extended to me in
the very respectful manner in which he bestowed it, restored
to me with renewed strength, such entire trust and confidence
in his manhood, that I could say, "my heart is fixed," trusting
in Dr. McFarland as my God-appointed deliverer and protector.

I had no reason to feel, after these three long years of ab-
solute desertion, that another man lived on earth who cared
for my happiness, but Dr. McFarland. Therefore, in choosing
him as my only earthly protector, I merely accepted of the
destiny my friends and the State had assigned me, and in
return for this boon thus forced upon me, I willingly offered
him a woman's heart of grateful love in return, as the only
prize left me to bestow.

If any of my readers are tempted to regard. this act as rash
and unreasonable, let me remind them that human instincts
are above human reason — that God's laws are subject to no
human conventional or legislative enactments. The law of
my nature instinctively extends pardon to the penitent — and
gratitude to a benefactor.

For example : should I be struggling for life amid the waves
that were engulphing me, and one who had been my worst
enemy should, at the risk ol his own life, rescue my own from
a watery grave, would I wait to reason upon the absurdity of

382 MODERN PERSECUTION.

giving my grateful heart's devotion to one who had hitherto
been my enemy ?

" Nay, verily all that a man hath will he give for his life."
So I as instinctively gave to the penitent Dr. McFarland, as
I then regarded him, all I had to give — my forgiveness — and
my grateful heart's devotion in return for his voluntary pro-
mise to bestow upon me that most invaluable prize — that
most blessed boon of human existence — my personal liberty.
I did then, and still do regard tins offering as none too costly
to lay upon the altar of my personal freedom.

And I say, moreover, that heart must have become ossified
or dead which would not pulsate in harmony with these laws
of its higher nature. And if this act was wrong or sinful,
under the circumstances, then I say to God's law — the law
of my nature — is the penalty justly due.

CHAPTER LVIIL

My Oldest Son Obtains My Discharge.

Theophilus, my oldest son, had been anxiously waiting, now
nearly three years, when he should be " of age," that he might
liberate me from my confinement. He visited me four times
during my incarceration, and had done all that lay in Ins
power to do, to procure my discharge, although his father had
forbidden his visiting me at all, and had threatened to disin-
herit him in case he should break this command.

The same threat hung over my second son, Isaac, also, but
he, like his brother, chose to expose himself to be disinherited,
rather than to suffer his mother to languish in her prison,
without human sympathy.

Cheering as it was to my fond heart to receive their true
sympathy, it was saddening, also, to know that every effort
they were making for my deliverance was abortive — that no
possible hope of relief could be expected through them until
they were twenty-one.

Their father, knowing their determination to help me to
liberty as soon as they attained this age, tried to guard this
avenue of escape, by negotiating with an Asylum in Massa-
chusetts, to take me under their lock and key, hoping thus to
elude their action. But ere this plan was consummated, Mr.
Packard was notified by the Trustees that he must remove
me in June.

Theophilus not knowing of this arrangement, made applica-
tion to his father to consent to his removing me from my
prison, assuring him that if he would allow him this privilege,
he would cheerfully support me himself, from his own hard
earnings. Knowing he could not legally remove me without
his father's consent, he made this proposal to induce him to do

384 MODERN PERSECUTION.

so, and his father knowing, too, that he must take me out
soon, consented to let him thus assume this responsibility.

Therefore, with a light heart, he sought his mother's cell
for the fourth time, and was most politely introduced into my
room by the Doctor as a " new man," just espousing the
rights, privileges, and powers of an individual man, subject to
no dictation but that of law and conscience ; said he :

" Here is a man who proposes to assume the responsibility
of being your protector — he has had his father's consent to do
so, and I have given him my own, and do hereby discharge
you into the hands of this new man. Mrs. Packard, you are
at liberty to go with your son where you please, and I do
hereby discharge you into- his hands."

Thanking him, as the Superintendent, for this discharge, I
begged the privilege oi consulting with him as our mutual
friend, respecting the best course to be pursued. Said I :

" You know, Doctor, that the law holds me still subject to
my husband, and therefore my son has no legal power to
protect my liberty only so far as his father's promise goes as its
security. Now I have no confidence in that man's word or
honor, and therefore I consider myself eminently exposed to be
kidnapped again, and put into the Asylum, at Northampton ;
so that without some other guarantee of safety than his promise,
I prefer to remain here until I can finish my book, which will
take about six weeks, and then I can have a means of self-
defense in my own hands, which I can use independent of any
legal process. Now I must be boarded somewhere these six
weeks ; why cannot my son pay my board here, as well as
any other place, and thus let me complete my book, unmo-
lested by any change until then ? "

The Doctor replied, " I see no objection to your doing so
if your son has none."

Theophilus replied, " I wish mother to do just as she thinks
best, and I am satisfied."

SON OBTAINS MY DISCHARGE. 385

Accordingly it was decided, by the consent of all parties,
that I should remain there until my book was finished, and
that my son should pay my board during this time.

I then, as a boarder, not as a prisoner, accompanied my son
on foot to Jacksonville, (the Asylum being about one mile
distant) where we consulted printers, respecting the terms on
which they would print my first volume — bought some paper
with my son's money and returned to my boarding-house — but
not to a prison — because I was not now an ^Woluntary prisoner,
although the bolts still confined me, with no key or pass of
my own to unbolt them.

In this sense, my prison life terminated four weeks before I
was removed from the Asylum, and I really felt safer under
the gallant protection of Dr. McFarland, than I could have
then felt in any other situation.

17

CHAPTER LIX.

The Trustees Force Me into the Hands
of Mr. Packard.

In about four weeks from the time of my discharge into the
hands of my son, the Trustees counter-ordered this Superin-
tendent's action, and claimed me as their prisoner still, by
ordering me to be put into the custody of my husband on the
18th of June, which time completed my three years term of
false imprisonment !

Although the Trustees had told me through their chairman,
Mr. Brown, that I might do just as Dr. McFarland and I should
think best, and although the Doctor had already discharged
me, and he had agreed to the arrangements above mentioned,
yet regardless of all these claims of honor and justice, they
deliberately trampled my every right into the dust, and treated
me as the law does, as a legal nonentity, whose rights no one
is bound to respect.

Yes, this is the respect which the identity of woman receives
in America, by assuming the bonds of the marriage union !

When will the time arrive, when the marriage law will re-
spect the identity of the woman as well' as the man ?

On the 17th of June, Doctor's orders were sent to my room,
by Miss Sallie Summers, the Supervisoress, that :

" Mrs. Packard's trunk must be taken out of her room and
packed."

Against this order I entered a protest in these words :

"In the name of Illinois and as its citizen, I claim that my
right to the disposal of my own wardrobe be respected — that no
hands be laid upon it without my consent. I therefore forbid
you or any other person disturbing me or my things, in

FORCED INTO MR. PACKARD' S HANDS. 387

my own hired room, until I consent to such interference."
My reply was reported to the office. The next order was :

" If Mrs. Packard makes resistance, lock her in a screen-
room !"

To this order I replied :

" I never offer physical resistance to the claims of might,
over my inalienable rights — but I give you no license or con-
sent to touch one article in this room belonging to myself."

The Doctor then, with the help of Miss Summers, searched
my room, bed, toilet and drawers and took from them every
thing belonging to me, and laid them into my trunk — then the
porter was ordered to take my trunk into the Matron's room to
be packed. This trunk now contained my entire book, journal
and private papers, indeed all my treasures — even the sacred
looking glass wherein my Eeproof to Dr. McFarland, was con-
cealed. What would be their fate, I knew not. But thanks to
the Power which held my usurpers, no article of my manu-
scripts were taken !

The book was, of course, seen and examined, but my private
journal was passed through their fingers unnoticed ; for the
Matron and Supervisoress were only required to number the
articles, and each article, large and small, being pinned up
separately, it was not necessary to examine the center of each
roll where lay a portion of this journal, which the Doctor so
much dreaded.

Nothing was taken except the inkstand Dr. Tenny had given
me, and the package of note paper my son had bought for me.
For this trespass, if not theft, I still hold the Institution re-
sponsible, in addition to what had been previously taken from
me wrongfully.

Dr. McFarland showed the coward on this occasion, by dele-
gating his orders to Dr. Tenny, and availing himself of a
leave of absence just at this time.

I think he had better have faced the battle !

388 MODERN PERSECUTION.

However his orders were faithfully executed, even to the
book, all being carefully packed, no part was missing !

Does not the Lord shut the mouth of lions so that they
cannot hurt others when he pleases ? Did I not have a host
fighting for me, although unseen to mortal eye ?

Yes, for so " the Lord encampeth about those who fear him
and He delivereth them."

The next morning, Miss Summers came with the order
that :

" Mrs. Packard must be suitably dressed by nine o'clock to
go with her husband on board the cars.

To this order I replied :

" Miss Summers, I have no objection to being dressed to-day
so as to suit the requirements of this mandate, even to the ex-
tent of wearing my bonnet and shawl suited to my traveling
dress, and will do so with your assistance in bringing me those
articles ; but as to accompanying the said gentleman to the cars,
I shall never consent to do this."

She accordingly exchanged my morning wrapper, for my
traveling dress, and packed my wrapper in my trunk. I then
put on my hat and gloves and laying my sun-shade across my
lap, I sat down in my chair before the window and went to
reading, as I had no other employment in consequence of the
assault of the previous day.

While thus employed, my door was suddenly and violently
opened by Dr. Tenny, who, without. knocking, or even asking
leave to enter, violently pushed the door against my bedstead,
which I had placed before it, as was my habitual practice, to
prevent intruders, having no other means of fastening my door
on the inside. I could easily move the bedstead back four
inches, and thus respond to a rap almost as quickly as I could
have turned a button or a bolt if I had had one, and I had done
so to give the Doctor's entrance hundreds of times.

But now this hasty, uncivil entrance into a lady's private

FORCED INTO MR. PACKARD'S HANDS. 389

room — by which my bedstead was pushed almost upon my
feet, as it was forced diagonally across my room by the great
and sudden violence of the door against it, and as it was
opened I saw three stout men standing at the door, almost
frightened me, and having disobeyed no order I was not a
little surprised at Dr. Tenny's impetuosity on this occasion.
I felt like saying to my captors as Christ did to his :

" Have you come out against me as a thief, with swords
and staves for to take me ? "

Dr. Tenny then said :

" Mrs. Packard, your husband is in the office waiting to take
you to the cars in the 'bus which is now waiting at the door.
We wish you to go with us for that purpose."

Looking at me for a reply, I said :

" Dr. Tenny, I shall not go with you for that purpose.
And here in the presence of these witnesses, I claim a right
to my own identity, and in the name of the laws of my
country, I claim protection against this assault upon my
personal rights. I claim a right to myself, I claim a right to
remain unmolested in my own hired room."

Turning to his porters, he said :

" Take Mrs. Packard up in your arms and carry her to the
'bus ! "

After instructing my new body-guard how to construct the
famous " saddle-seat " once more (an indispensable appendage
to the enforcement of the " nonentity " principle of the com-
mon law, in cases where intelligence claims the recognition
of an identity !) I quietly seated myself upon it and after the
attendants had, at my request, properly adjusted my clothing,
I held myself again in readiness to be offered a sacrifice on
the altar of unjust legislation to married women.

My guard transported their " nonentity" safely down three
long flights of stairs, preceded by Dr. Tenny, and followed by
my female attendants, to the door of the 'bus, where the Rev.

390 MODERN PERSECUTION.

Mr. Packard stood holding the door back for the reception of
this living burden of non-existence.

, Living burden of non-existence ! Married woman's legal
position under a Christian government !

Think ! Law-makers ! is this the way to raise woman to a
companionship with yourselves ?

Do you think this Reverend husband could look upon such
a spectacle and feel the inspiration of reverence for a being
whom the law thus placed in his absolute power ? or, would
not a man of his organization more naturally feel a contempt
for a worm whom he could thus crush beneath his feet ?

Yes, a Worm ! a Thing ! not a Being — is married woman
before the principles of common law. What wrongs cannot
be inflicted upon woman on this principle ?

And what power of self-protection can she use in case of
any assault and battery upon her person or her rights ?

Oh ! my gallant brothers of this republic ! just place your-
selves in my exact position, and from this standpoint, frame
such laws as would meet your own case. Then your doting
daughters will never be liable to suffer a similar experience.

I found other employees from the house had been appointed
to accompany this Reverend gentleman to the depot, to assist
him if necessary in the disposal of his " human chattel," and
with these gentlemen held a conversation on our way to the
depot.

But with this Reverend, I did not deign to speak.

I told these men I should not need their services any longer
— that I should go as any other unattended person did, into
the cars, as I did not recognize the claims of this legal pro-
tector at all, and should ignore them entirely, by holding no
sort of fellowship whatever with him. Therefore I wished
they would see that I was put on board and comfortably seated,
and I would excuse them from further duty. I could buy no
ticket for I had no money.-

FORCED INTO MR. PACKARD'S HANDS. 391

I told them I knew not to what place I was bound, whether
into another Asylum, a Poor-house, or a Penitentiary. No one
deemed it necessary to inform a " nonentity " or a " chattel "
in these matters, fortius act might -be an acknowledgment of a
right of choice in a" chattel," which would be absurd, you
know!

But from what my son had told me, I supposed he was go-
ing to put me into an Insane Asylum at Northampton, Mass.,
for life, as a case of hopeless insanity. Indeed I knew that was
his ultimate purpose concerning me, therefore it was, I did not
willingly pass into the hands of this man, for this purpose.

It was not that I wished for liberty with any diminished
ardor or intensity that I declined the boon now offered me ; but
because I apprehended its value to a greater degree than ever
before ; and also realized that another commitment into another
Asylum would greatly enhance the danger of my ever obtain-
ing this inestimable prize— that is, the crisis towards which I
felt myself verging must necessarily be postponed, perhaps
indefinitely, by another Asylum experience . The great question
with me seemed to be :

" Are you willing to be removed to another Asylum, and
risk the consequences of fighting another battle for freedom ;
or, do you prefer to have the question settled at once, in the
light of present experiences ?"

By my protest, I said, " this question shall be settled at
once — the issue shall not be transferred to another battle-field."

Whether a married woman can retain her personal identity
or not, was the great practical question involved in my case.
My hitherto painful experience had already furnished proof
sufficient, as it seemed to me, for the immediate agitation of
this question, and my experience had already shown that any
attempt to escape from this marital power was fruitless and im-
practicable, and also that any peace, regardless of justice, woidd
only be a treacherous sleep, whose waking would be death !

392 MODERN PERSECUTION.

"Go Willingly."

Written on the occasion of Dr. McFarland's saying that Mrs.
Packard must be removed by force from the Asylum, in case
she did not "go willingly."

" Go Willingly 1" to such a doom !
My God ! O lay me in the tomb,
Ere such a terrible decree
Bind me again by lock and key.

Where is the mother — where the wife,
Daughter or sister, who her life
Would "willingly" resign to thee,
Who thus would wield thy lock and key !

" Go Willingly!" my future life
To battle in that stormy strife,
Torture my fluttering heartstring there
Amid the waitings of despair ?

" Go Willingly ! " to waste life's hours,
Its aspirations, hopes and powers,
To bury my affections there,
In those dim haunts of black despair?

" Go Willingly /" to read my doom
Thus graven on a living tomb, —
Where hope or joy can never come,
Till death shall call the prisoner home?

I'd rather rove the world around,
Chained like a criminal on ground
Where God's own sun my light would be,
Without the aid of lock and key !

" Go Willingly " Thyself! and find
Cure of thy own " disordered " mind !
The very willingness would be
Proof of a fixed insanity.

Mrs. S. N. B. 0/

FORCED INTO MR. PACKARD'S HANDS. 393

I was put into the Asylum without my choice or consent,
I was thus removed without my consent, and contrary to my
choice. In either case my identity was ignored, in that my
right of choice was not recognized in either case. By my pro-
test, I alone recognize it, and claim it, illegal as this claim is.

Like the fugitive, I claim protection under the higher law,
regardless of the claims of the lower law.

My argument seemed to enable these gentlemen to see that
my principles required me to resist the "nonentity" principle
of the marriage law in this tangible manner, hoping thus to
demonstrate its injustice to the comprehension of the law
makers.

This having now been openly done, I had nothing further
to do but to be passed on as coming events should indicate.

I recollect one remark made by one of these attendants,
was:

" We shall miss you Mrs. Packard, at the Asylum, for there
never has been a person who has caused such universal
sensation there, as you have. You will - be missed at our
dances also, for you are regarded as one of our best dancers !"

I thanked him for the compliment, ill-deserved though it
was.

Before closing this chapter, I feel bound to say that the
action of the Trustees in this case was far from being upright
or gentlemanly. They had given me unqualified liberty to do
as their Superintendent and I should agree to do. Their Su-
perintendent had already discharged me. He had made a
bona fide bargain, in presence of a witness, that I might use
that room of the Institution as my hired room until I had
finished my book. I was no longer subject to his, or the In-
stitution's control, as a patient. Now to have these gentle-
men ignore this business of their Superintendent in this sum-
mary manner, and at my expense, seemed ungallant at least,
if not unjust and illegal.
17*

394 MODERN PERSECUTION.

Again, these gentlemen had in their hands, in my own hand-
writing, a protest against being put into the hands of my hus-
band, assuring them it would never be done by my own consent.

They had also heard from my own lips my reasons for taking
this stand, and Mr. Brown, the chairman, had told me himself
that he saw it would be useless for me to go to my husband for
protection ; and yet, after all, he could issue this order to a
boarder in the Asylum, that she must be forced into the hands
of this her persecutor, just when the way seemed prepared
for deliverance, by means of her printed book.

If my readers wish to know why the Superintendent was
not on hand to defend the rights of his boarder, I must refer
them to him for this answer, for he has never told me his
reasons for doing so.

Therefore, I can only oifer you my own conjectures on this
point. I suspect this " young convert" was seized with an-
other temptation to " backslide," too powerful for his "weak
faith" to withstand, and therefore he had tried to throw off
the responsibility of my removal upon the Trustees, hoping
by this means to secure Mr. Packard's co-operation in destroy-
ing my book, without doing so directly himself, and wishing
at the same time to retain my good will, he hoped his absence
might better subserve all these ends than his presence. There-
fore he made Dr. Tenny his agent in doing this mean work,
by proxy.

One reason for coming to this conclusion lies in the fact
that, after my return home, I accidentally ascertained that the
Doctor had advised Mr. Packard to burn my book and put me
into another Asylum ; and he had volunteered his aid in
doing so !

I also accidentally found a letter from Dr. McFarland
wherein he says to Mr. Packard, "I have laid your request for
Mrs. Packard's re-admission before the Trustees, and have used
my influence to have them consent to take her. But they

FORCED INTO MR. PACKARD' S HANDS. 395

decidedly refuse to do so, on the ground that the Institution
is not designed for such cases."

In the same letter, he advised Mr. Packard to keep the facts
of this transaction from all public prints, and shun all agita-
tion of the subject in any form. For said he :

" The dignity of silence is the only safe course for us both
to pursue."

Another evidence that he had slidden back into the old self-
ish " policy" principle is seen in the fact that a lettter was read
in Court at Kankakee, from Dr. McFarland, wherein he
urged that I was insane, in the form of a certificate, which
Mr. Packard could use for my incarceration in another Asy-
lum!

This did not harmonize with the pledges he had given me
in the Asylum that he would be the defender of my personal
liberty.

Another evidence that he has backslidden, lies in the fact
when I met him in June, 1868, in Jacksonville, before the
State's Investigating Committee, at the Dunlap House, he made
a most strenuous effort to prove me insane, for the purpose ol
invalidating my testimony as a witness against the evils of
that Institution.

After an examination and a cross-examination occupying
nearly seven hours at a single session, with the aid of his
attorney and the Trustees, he failed entirely to produce this
conviction on the minds of the audience, if ex-Gov. Hoffman's
testimony is a representation of others present, which I
have reason to think is the case ; said he to 'me at the close
of this tedious session ;

"Mrs. Packard, I believe you to be a perfectly sane person,
and moreover, I believe you always have been."

Thanking him for the comfort this announcement gave me,
I left better fortified to meet a most cruel and wanton attack
Dr. McFarland then make upon my moral character, while he

396 MODERN PERSECUTION.

knew, better than any other man, that my character was
stainless.

Looking at Dr. McFarland's character from these various
standpoints, I am forced into the unwelcome conviction that
he is a most unprincipled man, and on this ground is un-
worthy of confidence as a man, and much less as a public
servant.

I have done all I knew how to do to raise this man, from the
low level of selfish policy to the higher platform of Christian
principle — but all in vain — I now herewith pass him over into
the power of that State, whose public servant he is, hoping
and praying that this power may be able to do for this man's
benefit what "woman's influence' ' has failed to accomplish.

And if the State will not receive him, I then leave him with
his own worst enemy — Himself!

If any of my readers wish to know what has been my destiny
from the time of this discharge, I would refer them to my
Second Volume, wherein they will find this part of my expe-
rience delineated, affording a fearful exhibition of the abuse
of marital power, which every married woman is liable to suffer,
in her present position of legal disability to defend herself.

CHAPTER LX.

An Appeal to the Government to Protect

the Inmates of Insane Asylums

by law.

God's laws are above all other laws and therefore human
instincts are above all human enactments. No matter what
the penalty — the more atrocious and cruel, the more certain
are they to be disregarded. No human power can stand a
law in violation of our natural instincts.

Our present Insane Asylum System ignores these principles.
It says :

" God's laws are subject to human enactments."

It tramples upon the highest and noblest instincts of our
nature, and enthrones an autocrat to rule over them, instead
of the rule of reason. The law of sympathy, which God has
established in our natures, as one of its noblest elements,
suffers strangulation under this Asylum System.

Instead of developing this faculty in a normal manner, by
caring for and administering to the unfortunate one, whom
Providence has placed under our charge, for our own especial
discipline and development, we admit the human law of
Charitable Institutions to usurp this holy instinct of human
sympathy, and its aspirations die out for want of their natural
nutriment to perfect the vigorous growth it naturally seeks
for in the human soul.

Thus God's law, or our human instinct of sympathy, is
supplanted by human enactments.

No matter how large the compensation offered in lieu of this
usurpation, nothing can compensate for the blemish our divine
natures receive by this soul strangulating process.

398 MODERN PERSECUTION.

The orphan, for instance, in order to receive the benefits
of the Orphan Asylum, is compelled first to sever the purest
and holiest affection of his nature — the love of his parent — as
his necessary passport to the benefits of the Institution. The
price is too dear — the equivalent received can not be commen-
surate to the loss sustained to secure it. But if, instead of
depriving the orphan of a mother's love — its God-given heri-
tage— they should so disburse the charities of the Institution
as to secure this influence to the child, as the first God-given
risht of his nature : then these charities would act in concert
and harmony with God's law, instead of conflicting with it,
as the Orphan Asylums are now compelled to do.

So in the case of the insane — to sever them from the sym-
pathy of their own kindred, is to deprive them of the first
God-given right of their nature ; and no adequate equivalent
can be rendered as a compensation for this usurpation.

But if the charities of our present Insane Asylum System
could be appropriated so as to act in concert with this in-
fluence, then would this system bless both the giver and the
receiver of natural affection and human sympathy.

They would then be doing right by their unfortunates, and
as the result of a law of our nature, they would consequently
feel right towards them.

Whereas our present system compels them to act wrong
towards them, by severing them from home influences ; and
they of course, come to feel wrong towards them, as the in-
evitable result.

First comes a feeling of indifference, as the result of casting
off a responsibility which God had laid upon them to bear ;
then succeeds the feeling of alienation, as the heart gradually
ossifies by this extinction of human sympathy, which a neglect
of our practical duties to our natural responsibilities produces.

I never knew this legitimate tendency of our present system
to lead to any different results, when practically applied.

APPEAL TO THE GOVERNMENT. 399

Therefore, in order to place the axe at the root of the evils
of our Insane Asylum System, and other Eleemosynary Insti-
tutions, there must be a recognition of this great fundamental
truth, that human instincts are above human enactments.

Again the despotic treatment which patients received under
the present government of Insane Asylums is the only natural
result of one of the fundamental laws of human nature, in its
present undeveloped state ; which is, that the history of our
race for six thousand years demonstrates the fact, that absolute
unlimited power always tends towards despotism — or an
usurpation and abuse of others' rights.

Superintendents have, in a practical sense, a sovereignty
delegated to them, by the insane laws, almost as absolute as
the marital power which the law delegates to the husband.
All of the inalienable rights of their patients are as completely
subject to their single will, in the practical operation of these
laws, as are the rights of a married woman to the will of her
husband.

And these despotic Superintendents and Husbands in the
exercise of this power, are no more guilty, in my opinion, than
that power which licenses this deleterious element. No Re-
publican Government ought to permit an absolute monarchy
to be established under its jurisdiction. And where it is found
to exist, it ought to be destroyed forthwith. And where this
licensed power is known to have culminated into a despotism,
which is crushing humanity, really and practically, that Gov-
ernment is guilty in this matter, so long as it tolerates this
usurpation.

Therefore, while the Superintendents are guilty in abusing
their power, I say that Government which sustains oppression
by its laws, is the first transgressor.

Undoubtedly our Insane Asylums were originally designed
and established, as humane Institutions, and for a very humane
and benevolent purpose ; but, on their present basis, they really

400 MODERN PERSECUTION.

cover and shield many wrongs, which ought to be exposed
and redressed.

It is the evils which cluster about these institutions, and
these alone, which I am intent on bringing into public view,
for the purpose of having them destroyed. All the good which
inheres in these institutions and officers is just as precious as
if not mixed with the alloy ; therefore, in destroying the
alloy, great care should be used not to tarnish or destroy the
fine gold within it.

As my case demonstrates, they are now sometimes used for
inquisitional purposes, which certainly is a great perversion
of their original intent.

That great abuses have grown up in connection with Insane
Asylums, both in this country and in Europe, is a truth that
has been fully established by recent revealments.

Governed as they are, the Superintendent is an absolute,
irresponsible autocrat. Whoever falls within his power may
be most foully wronged, having no means of redress.

The unfortunate has been cut off from the right of using the
mails, or from communicating with friends in any way except
under the eye and ear of the Superintendent, and in too many
instances what the people have regarded as noble institutions
of charity, have been foul prisons, where savage discipline
has taken the place of kind, curative treatment.

Nor are these institutions essentially different, wherever
found. The trouble with them is, that the theories on which
they proceed are essentially wrong, and their practice just the
opposite of what it should be. Until these are changed it will
be a question as to whether asylums do most good or harm.

The most heinous wrong of our present system consists in
the fact that the inmates of Insane Asylums are denied the
primeval right of self-defence.

Under our present legislation every citizen of most of the
States in this Union is constantly exposed to lose this right by

APPEAL TO THE GOVERNMENT. 401

an incarceration in an Insane Asylum, since these institutions
must necessarily be based upon the principles of an autocracy,
under which government the right of self-defence is annihilated.

Now, simply for a misfortune to place any citizen outside
the pale of justice, while inside an Insane Asylum, is not
only unjust but inhuman.

There should, therefore, be a superior power inaugurated
by Legislatures by which this autocratic power, when abused,
can be held amenable to the laws of our Republic.

And since there now exists no link to connect the inmates
of our Insane Asylums with the laws of our Republic — thus
leaving them wholly at the mercy of an autocrat — there should
be one through which this unfortunate class can secure the
protection of law, when needed. A Standing Committee of
Protection should be enacted by every Legislature, as the link
connecting the inmates of asylums with the laws of the country.

It is not assumed that Superintendents, as individual auto-
crats, need to be watched any more than any other individual
invested with unlimited power.

But it is argued that no absolute autocracy should be created
and sustained by a Republic whose fundamental principles
require that every citizen shall be held amenable to the laws,
and be able also to seek the protection of law, when needed,
in defence of their inalienable rights.

Now the insane have the same inalienable right to be treated
with reason, justice and humanity as the sane ; therefore, the
insane ought to have the same protection of law as the sane.

But under the present rule of asylums they have none at all.
No matter to what extent their right to justice is ignored,
there is granted them no chance whatever for self-defence.

This Protective Committee should have free and unrestricted
post-office communication with every inmate of every asylum
in order that they may ascertain if any individual, among all
this unfortunate class, can be found who needs the protection

402 MODERN PERSE CUTION .

of justice, and should administer it, when found, without
a question to be entitled to it.

The law should give to this Committee a power superior to
that of the Superintendent, by which he himself can be held
amenable to the laws, in his exercise of power over his patients,
through this Committee.

For example, if this autocrat should be found to have been
guilty of " assault and battery, manslaughter or murder," in
his realm, he could then be held accountable to the laws like
any other criminal found guilty of like offence outside of an
asylum, and this Committee would constitute a link between
him, as the Superintendent, and justice, as they would between
his patients and justice.

It would be a humane law. It is a much needed law. It
would be an honor to every State in this Union to pass such
a law, through which she could administer to her afflicted
ones the right of self-defence while confined as inmates within
the prison walls of an Insane Asylum.

Iowa has already immortalized herself as the banner State
in this great humanitarian reform. The " Bill " which her
Legislature of 1872 passed, securing the protection of law to
the inmates of her own Insane Asylums, will be found in the
Second Volume and is here commended to the candid con-
sideration of every Legislature in this Union.

It is fondly hoped this bright example will speedily be fol-
lowed by all the States in the Union, and thus demonstrate
the fact that this American Government is a Christian
Government, in that she can then claim, and be entitled to
the honor of protecting by its laws — the right of self-defence
— even to that most unfortunate of all classes of its citizens
— the Inmates of Insane Asylums.

End of Vol. I.

DATE DUE

201-6503

Printed
In USA